Oct 9 2008Hugh Hefner: Low on sperm, but not on love

FRIST BITCHES!

XOXOXO

- Randal

thats just because he's always shootin it all over the place...

Who knew that you can't get knocked up from dust, er, I mean Hef's tadpoles.

As much sex as Hef has had, I am sure he is close to empty by now anyway. His nuts probably look like raisins by now.

This immoral pervert has been instrumental in bringing what used to be in the bedroom into America's living rooms. Our nation has been siezed by a culture that is not our own and the average character is sadly too dumb to be aware of the FACT.

time to take down our flag and put up the Victor's

(anyone care to guess what flag that is?)

HAHAHAHA

"She was testing here this weekend"

Classic line. He treats these 20 yr old sluts like dogs, not even, like pieces of meat. And they just keep lining up, way to go feminism.

He's my idol.

@#5: Stick it up your ass, ya prude.

Hef's still the man. Time to update the bimbos anyway.

Talk all the shit you want. This guys gotten more ass than a toilet seat....

.

Gross geezer sex! With PLA stock < $3, no wonder she wants out before the dude becomes a Wal Mart greeter.

#5, get a life, you repressed Puritan

anyway, it IS a bit frightening that he's 80+ and going after girls that can't legally drink.....

I wonder if tossing Hef's salad with ranch dressing is part of the test.

I bet Barack Obama's daddy could have impregnated her, but he would have abandoned the bastard mulatto child

I love you Randal!

#5...I give! What flag? (I know I will regret this)

Some fucking cunts just don't want to get a job. But sucking wrinkled penis for room and board? SLUT WHORES!

These, bitches must have a high tolerant for ben gay...

hef is my idol and after 80+ years he has to right to treat these young bitches like meat. good looks will go away but being a dumb ass last forever.

You keep hitting that young shit, Hef. The real estate market is in the toilet, the economy is the shits, and the whole world is a mess. But the one thing that gets me out of bed every morning is the knowledge that an 82 Year-old guy like you is out there pounding the shit out of some brainless bimbo like Kendra.

Make us all proud. Pop another Viagra and slip your mangled old cock in to another confused girl that just got off the bus from Nebraska.

You and your dick are icons of this great country. So get out there and start pounding away!

HEF - Good for you, and Good for America.

For every super hot girl there's a guy who's bored of fucking her and putting up with her bullshit...

Haah! Suck it, Hugh.

With your empire crumbling, you're going to be giving handjobs for coins behind the Santa Monica promenade by year's end.

There's alot of people on here slagging off the 'Heff', what's wrong with you ? You're either Jealous, A Woman, or just plain stupid..!! Heff gives all us guys hope that we'll still be banging hot chicks into our twilight years, and all you girls hope that you can bag an ageing millionaire playboy (THE ORIGINAL PLAYBOY..i might add..) So please take your hats (..or pants) off and salute the Heff for the god that he is.
Thankyou.

Hey, just get a Mexican or latina girl... they can generate babies on very low sperm counts.. even a vasectomy... as in my case... son of a...

Umm isnt that Holly,and NOT Karissa Shannon, in that picture? It looks exactly like her.

Umm isnt that Holly Madison in the picture and not Karissa Shannon?

#24 Danklin
The girl on The Superficial's picture is Holly.

But this page is quoting E! News, and the picture on the E! News page is of the twins. Click on the the "E! News" link in that sentence.

There are two accounts of this story. In one, Hef says he had sperm count issues and in another he's quoted as saying he didn't want to get married or have more kids (People's account).

He speaks as though his girlfriends are perspective employees. Holly left her position, so now he has to hire more. The fact that he calls these high-priced call girls "girlfriends" is insulting to those who are actually involved in real, committed relationships. At least simply calling them arm candy or trophies would be honest...

"SINNERS!!!! All of you are just plain immoral SINNERS!!!! "

"You, along with all the other idolators will perish in a lake of fire where there will be weeping and knashing of teeth! Repent NOW before the day of Judgement arrives! For those who seek salvation with the Lord shall indeed be saved, and those who remain lost will truly per...oh my Lawd that girl with Hef be lookin' fine! Can I get an Amen????"

Talk about livin the dream baybee!

eighty-two?... wow... just wow

#18 You are a sick bastard for waking up every morning thinking about an 82 year old man having sex. I doubt that his old rickety body could pound anything except a tube of Bengay

I wonder if he ever lost his dentures in their vagina while eating them out.

@30 WTF is wrong with an 82 year old man spanking some 19 year old slut from Nebraska. You must be some pathetic loser that can't get the time of day from the opposite sex. What ever that is for you. Should we just call you Pat?

#21 If he didn't have money, he wouldn't get any pussy. He is no god or legend. He's just a rich old man who likes to show off the whores that he buys. Instead of buying their services for an hour, he buys their services for a year or two. Any rich old man can do what he does. If I am lucky enough to be a rich some day, I would do the same thing. That won't make me a god or legend.

RANDAL?!? Shame on you for using the word 'bitches!'

You're the one that always writes words of encouragement to the 'celebs' we bash. Come on now!

The problem dear children is not that Hugh's sperm count is low, no, it's HIS BAN ACCOUNT IS LOW!
YEs, fwendz, Hugh Hefner is losing money faster than white faced Jacko with a Platinum Amex card in FAO Schwarz. LOok, Jacko, children ! BOY CHILDREN! I'll ring the dinnerbell ...

#32 Watching an 82 year old man having sex gives you a hard-on, but grosses me out. I don't know what's your obsession with Nebraska. Maybe you like to be cornholed.

@#36: LMAO

Well played, sir/ma'am. Well played.

I can't wait for Holly's sex video to pop on local shelves.

I envy Hugh because he can still get errections.

How do you know he can still get erections?

Heff is gonna die hilt deep. Love that man!

Amy Leigh Andrews is smoking hot way better than Holly so good job Hef !!

Those twins are hideous. All of the current girls are hotter. Even Bridget who is almost all enough to be their mother. But maybe they have hot bodies.

Amy Leigh Andrews has a myspace page that induces seizures: http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendID=110511322

This is just another jew living off pornography and vice.
Soon, they will come for your daughters.

"I wonder if he ever lost his dentures in their vagina while eating them out."

I've seen an old man's dentures suddenly pop out of his mouth before. Your thought is definitely a possibility.

As much as it damages my psyche to admit it, I feel kinda bad for him. He probably had a vasectomy after his WIFE had a baby and was stringing HM along, but I think he figured she'd be the one who would love him to his grave. He'll die a lonely old man. Surround by silicone, poontang and millions of dollars.
Wait. What was I saying, again?

I am not in any way a prude. However, I find it repulsive to see an ugly perverted crone using his money to fuck young women who almost certainly are disgusted by his ancient body.
I believe that my country has lost most of it's national character and is being lead by a people of a different character or lack therof. This is not the same place as it was decades ago.
I am not sure if I want to see Jesus paraded around on South Park as an imbecile and no I am not a Christian either.
Why has christmas been taken away from us? Why is it Seasons Greetings now?
Yeah I know you fools don't get it. It's too late now anyway and just doesn't matter so I hope Hef gets a nice chick who just turned 18 and has her suck his gross dick. There. Am I still a prude?
#7 Stick it up your own ass fag.

Isn't Heather Locklear or Denise Richards available?

@18 - you really think an 82 year old man can "pound" these girls??

Thanks for the laugh. These girls (who actually go to the gym) would probably be stronger and definitely ALOT fitter than Hef. Trust me, he aint "pounding" them and if he is, its because the girls are humoring him.

@ 33 - totally agree. ANY guy with millions of dollars can buy whores. Big freakin deal. Its not like Hef is seducing these girls with his animal magnetism, charm, big cock, skills in bed (all the things girls really want) he pays them to be seen with him.

Wow, what a god.

THAT'S THE CRUCIAL POINT IN RELATIONSHIPS, folks!!

"They very much want to be girlfriends and now under the present circumstance, they probably will become my girlfriends," Hefner says.

WTF? What is he, in 8th grade? Christ old dude, give it up - you were THE MAN in the 1960's, but come on, any guy can dial up better porn on line at no charge than waste $$ buying a Playboy for pix of digitally enhanced tarts with IQ's lower than a bar of soap.

"...will become my girlfriends." What's that mean, Hef? That they feed you strained beets while you talk about the "good old days" of coppin' a feel off of Jayne Mansfield?

Hugh Hefner is one of the skeeviest, grossest people around. Even talking about having 19 year old girlfriends is grotesque. I can't wait for him to FINALLY die. And, yes, these women are concubines and nothing more...forget this girlfriend shit. They cast a bad light on women everywhere as money-grubbing whores. Yech.

Hugh needs to read our article on low sperm count and how to increase it, then he would know it is all those frequent ejaculations causing it!

listen to me.

puffin is a handsome man, with a heart of gold.

some of us would ENJOY not having to fork up $28 bucks a month at planned parenthood. GOD, holly. youre such a bitch.

All the viagra in the world couldn't keep this feeble old fellow erect. Hef is hovering near dementia. His poor penis has to rest on its laurels.............

oh for fuk sake!!! Hef isnt bangin these chicks, how the fuck could they I mean can you honestly imagine Kendra enjoyin an old wrinkly body on top of her banging her its all a sham to boost his ego and image