Sep 22 2008Heidi Montag & Spencer Pratt immortalized because God is a cruel bastard

THIS is what's wrong with this site these days. You can't have it both ways - promoting non-celebs while pretending to make fun of them. Does anybody doubt that Douche and Douchette's agent pays sites to post these "stories"?

What the hell?! That is horrible... Who would want to eat there?? (Besides Speidi of course)

I think there's 5 Heidi Montag posts for every 1 post about anything else.

what the fuck.

retards. i hope they both burn in hell....oh wait they will

I can't stop staring at her freakish jaw. How dare she go out in public?

What the hell did these two idiots do to get famous?! Are they just from MTV or did one of them invent the Sham-Wow!

PRATT! the funniest surname ever and translates to British-English well. Love it .

OMG could her white bag be any bigger!!?? (no pun intended LOL)

EEEEEK i love them!
where can i mapquest this shit to go eat here????
i'd stare. i'd stare!!

I'm guessing LC won't be dining there EVER

lol those two fucking morons are good at stirring shit up, that's for sure.

IMG I hate these fuckers...can't they die already? Once again, why are they famous?

Furthermore I found this video of the MTV music awards and a guy was trying to interview these douche bags and they were basically like no and the guy looks at the camera and says "and that is why we all hate Spencer and Heidi."

When they come in, it makes you wonder who left.

She must have had lip injections on the day they took that photograph because her lips look fugishly weird...

She must have had lip injections on the day they took that photograph because her lips look fugishly weird...

She must have had lip injections on the day they took that photograph because her lips look fugishly weird...

Why does Pratt look soulless and vacant in his painting?

It's like he was kidnapped and his portrait was aged 30 years to show what he might look like should he be alive today. Oh, what a fantasy.

Now we know Wolfgang is not above getting cheap publicity....

Police have issued two photographs, one showing how Pratt looked upon his apprehension by authorities... the second... what authorities believe he looks like after the sex change.

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!

That's HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Like Heidi EATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YOU have GOT to be MOTHERFUCKING kidding me with this. Really? REALLY?????? Ok fine. I never liked Wolfgang Puck, his canned soups SUCK!!

And, the gay one looks really fucking ugly in that painting. I'd sue (well if I weren't Spencer Patt and retarded)..

are these by martin schoeller?
his 'big head' portraits are awesome.

Either this site is getting weak as shit, or all the decent celebs that people actually want to hear about are at home picking their asses. I think it's a mix of both.

are they wearing the same color lipstick in these photos on the wall? i agree with #18, total before/after pics of sexual reassignment surgery.

I swear to doG, everytime I see that douchebag's face I wanna go on a killing spree, with him as my first victim.

ugh, why don't these two idiots just go away?

www.cafepress.com/angryrobotwear

I just want everyone to know i had the chance to destroy those and didnt because i didnt want to loose the job- i printed and trimmed those to ugly mug shots u see there up behind the to real live deusche bags.. sorry peeps-- i would have if i could have!

~420~

I don't get it.

I just do not get it.

.

#25:

Let the rage flow and don't hold back. If a jury somehow convicts you (doubtful), I will send you cigarettes for the duration of your incarceration. Gladly.

Wolfgang Puck's website noted that he just changed the restaurant's name from "Cut" to 'Cunt". Now I see where he was going with the portraits....

yea they're portrait PHOTOS (not paintings) by martin schoeller. they might be the most useless shitheads in hollywood, but these are still def beautiful portrait photos.

To everyone... it's ignorant people like you that make this site successful so give yourself a nice pat on the back. *claps hands*.

To Superficial Writer...I'm in love with you. Seriously! lol

I love to hate this couple. Spencer is an ass that doesn't deserve heidi and Heidi is a famewhore that let's her "talent" go to waste by having Spencer as her manager. Seriously! Ugh I hate this couple so much but just can't stop reading about them. I guess I have to thank them for my entertainment while at work!

God I hate them. http://tinyurl.com/4gub9b

#32 - was that some type of reverse psychology? That may be the dumbest, most "blind follower" comment I've read here, yet you start by calling somebody else "ignorant." At least we all can read your comment and understand, painfully, that a small group of tards exists that continues to support the "celebrity" status of these soulless douchebags. It's much clearer who, exactly, needs to be killed.

Someone remind me: what's the point of looking at Heidi when she's not displaying her Wondercleavage?

what happens when they break up? Will their faces be separated?

As Binky would say, #32 is an inside job. You're not fooling anybody. There's no excuse to continue publicizing these idiots.

#27

Next time, cut your nose off to spite your face. Give us the small satifiaction that there is some sort of social justice available in this plastic world of ours.

How much are they paying you to keep these two idiots in the limelight?

I agree with #10. These two are the biggest douche bags to walk the planet. i can't believe heidi puts up with spencer's shit.

That's the price these two pay for being part of the celebrity crowd -- everyone wants to be seen with them. Although the pictures do not do either of them justice, it's their hard work, dedication and exposure that has made them both rising stars.

Randal

WHAT THE FUCKKKKKKKKKKK??????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Nobody's handbag should be that gigantic, WTF?! Then again, it's the perfect size to fit both Heidi and Spencer's body parts in........and daydream over. Boo.

Hey, at least their pictures make for good target practice:

http://www.captainassclown.com/72-heidi-montag-spencer-pratt-rifle-range-targets.html

Randal, you freaking ROCK!

At least Heidi has her damn mouth closed in the over sized, Orwellian photo.

Well. Theyre in fornt of theyre respectful painting. Heidi has man jaw, and Spencer is a bitch.

my god she is waaaaaay too skinny!...she is so fuuuucking ugly!

Awesome, more Spencer Pratt. My favorite!

That's a plane I'd like to see crash with no survivors.........

Ode to a Tapeworm:

Hard work and putting up with people's shit are virtues few maintain. All the best to a hardworking creature who goes to extreme lengths to achieve the goals it sets for itself. A true display of awesome intestinal fortitude rare in our lackadaisical modern world.

Randal's Rectum

I AM NOW CERTAIN CIVILIZATION IS COMING TO AN END

I mean, people are supposed to try to eat there with those two hideous faces looking down upon them? Why not put up pictures of leprosy victims too?

Somebody send Gordon Ramsey into that restaurant quick!

Maybe we're sheltered here in NZ, but who the hell are these two?? They take up a lot of Superficial space, nobody likes them.........they seem to spend their time constantly posing in totally artificial situations. I don't even know them and they drive me mad!

spencer looks like a lesbian that just had a sex change operation and was issued testosterone. The boy is very peculiar indeed!

spencer looks like a lesbian that just had a sex change operation and was issued testosterone. The boy is very peculiar indeed!

Yikes!!!

Those are some scary paintings!!

I couldn't enjoy myself knowing I was being strared upon by Spencer the fairy princess and Gorgon, ruler of the lantern-jawed drones.

BTW, does that fruit pie take his hair off at night? That has to be a helmet

Hear that?*

It's the sound of Mr. Superficial cashing another check from Heidi & Spencers' publicist.......again.

*cha-ching!

I bet The Superficial gets paid to post stories about these two. If it weren't for this site, I wouldn't even know who these people are.

Not cool at all...

They look like brother and sister......

They look like the composite pictures put together by nursery schoolers from magazines. You know, lips from this one, one eye from another, mismatched new perfect nose...granted, a fairly good description of Heidi's incrementally plastic person.

Unfortunately, nothing can change Spencer's superior doucheousity, but in the name of real mankind i"ll try. Superfish, rusty scalpal, stat!

You pucked up, Wolfgang. "CUT" is right - it's what most people want to do when they see those twin vacant zombie stares of death on the wall.

Hah, republican wunderdouches! Somewhere (a stall in the minneapolis airport bathroom) rough daddy is crying, or, more likely, gagging on cheney's penisballs.

They both pray to gawd for COCK.

Heidi & Spencer love the cock.

Let us PREY!

Ok im not reading post regarding this 2 freaks, but who in the hell are these 2, are they famaous for something? I live in germany but I know a lot of US celeb, but never heard a word of this 2?

You peeps r jest jealous! You don't have the fame, fortune and good looks , WE DO! God loves us!

So I was watching Team America; World Police last night and noticed that Heidi looks exactly like Lisa, the wooden marionette. I wonder if she took a picture of her with her to the plastic surgeon??

"God is a cruel bastard"

Not only that, he/she is veangeful, malevolent, jealous, immature and most of all....a creepy mass murderer.

Now, pass those family values bible stories about rape, murder, slavery, drunkenness and incest.

i love you heidi montag; now and forever.

Vomit. Thank god they are not up here at Wolfgang's in New York. So I can eat there without barfing the delicious food back up.

If thats really you guys writing about yourselves, please crawl under a rock someplace and die, is this really the kind of fame and fortune you want? The kind that makes anyone that knows you not proud but embarrased for you? And the kind that makes people hate you, not want to represent you. And you are definitley not good looking, heidi you used to be so cute before all of your plastic surgery, so natural now you look like a freak, spencer has always looked like some freakish elf. Heidi, you keep being oblivious to the fact that you encouraged jen to hook up w/ brody even though lauren liked him and was seeing him, you egged both of them on, that's why you will NEVER be friends again, who does that to someone especially your best friend who was only ever trying to protect you from that sleaze bag? God loves people that are kind and don't sin everyday. That's not you!!!

Those portraits kind of remind me of the ones of Will Farrell and his wife during their wedding reception in "Old School."

I bought a Wolfgang Puck frozen spicy chicken pizza the other day. Cost me $7.50. It was the worst pizza I ever had! I ate one piece of it and threw the rest of the vile stuff in the trash. Figures that this overpriced phony asshole would have portraits of Heidi and Spencer in his cheesy, low-priced, overrated dive.

They look horrible in the paintings. Creepy.

The guy creeps me out. He looks like Paul Bernardo. If you don't know who the hell that is just google it. Compare pictures of the two and you'll never look at Spencer the same way again.

Who the fuck are these people seriously? I never heard of any of them before this blog, does seriously anybody cares about them?

Stop posting shit about them, no one cares, even if i knew who they were, i still wouldn't care.

Unbelievable.

PLEASE stop posting about these two idiots! I love the site, but I can't stomach these two much longer!!

Sooo, Wolfgang Puck wants his diners to vomit of their dinners? He must. I mean, as soon as someone looks as Spencer Pratt's Cabbage Patch face hanging on the wall, their dinner's coming right out. Those beady, piggy eyes, those fat chubby lips, those fatty fat cherubic repulsive cheeks, that dick-like chin...Yeah the dinners are gonna be flying...

he looks like Eugene Tooms from the X Files.

Yarr, that'll be replacing the whale in my dreams

They look like some nightmare Aryan overlords

Who are they? And why?

That is the most hideous shit I've ever seen.

*

I don't get it. Who the hell are these two nothings?

*

Pratt? Isn't that a term the British use for someone who's an idiot?

*

The way he poses his head at the camera.. Every photo he makes sure he looks dead on at the camera; posing like he thinks he's a homo beauty queen.

i can't believe this shit. i ate at this very restaurant for my birthday this past summer and i loved it. BUT I WILL NEVER GO BACK THERE as long as these fucking imbeciles faces festoon their walls. who the fuck was in charge of this mind-numbing decision? are there really any people interested in these two cretins and the utter pointlessness of their existence? why am i even furthering the flames w/ my commentary? normally i zip right past any speidi drivel when i encounter it... but this actually offends me personally. i want to gouge out these fucking retards eyeballs with a bayonette and skullfuck them w/ an ar-15. if i have to read one more thing about these fucking nobodys i'm going to lose my mind. the only thing that would interest me that was connected to these two cunts would be a new brand of grilling charcoal that's made from their ashes.

I'm a HUGE fan of Schoeller's work, but the fact that he shot these two vapid wankers makes me very dissapointed.

damnit...puck makes such good soup! now all i can think of is those two creepy skin cancerlike stares. indigestion :(

I'm so happy I can't afford to dine at such establishments.

That slut has a square head!!!! She does look like a man with that chin..

God, remember when Heidi Montag was cute BEFORE she fucked up her face with all that plastic and her life with that even more plastic guy?

hey they're not really republicans, obama's campaign paid good money for them to endorse mccain.

I'm sure alot of people have to PUKE now!!
............I pretty well understand, FOLKS!!

it looks like the artist added a few years...

1) That whore needs to go to finishing school. Bad. You don't carry a white bag after labor day, you can bring out the off-white/winter white bag during the winter;
2) You don't go to a dinner party honoring your ugly ass photo, and hold that ginormous bag while you hold a champagne. Copy cats don't know when it's appropriate to carry the proper bag in particular environments. They just see so-and-so carrying it "all the time" so they do, too. It probably has gas-x and diet pills in it anyway.
3) Don't even get me started on your low-rise washed out CROP jeans paired with some platform sandals, ugly belt, bare-midriff, and SCARF... Don't EVEN get me started, bitch.

GOD... I can only hope the point of these photos on the wall is to throw food at them and perhaps even bows and arrows... is this Wolfgang's training center on how to throw bad food away?

These are a couple of the most strange looking people that I have ever seen. I'm not sure why you would ever want any size picture of them.

Heidi & Spencer Love the Cock (just like TCLTC).

These idiots are shallow, uneducated, have no talent at all, both suck cock, are trying desperately to pretend and convince people that they are stars.

that is the ugliest piece of artwork i have ever seen!!

Does anyone else think that they look like siblings??!?!?!?!?!

Cabbage Patch Dolls were modeled after his compressed face.

God...they are both so ugly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm sorry.... have I missed a whole decade's worth of news about these 2 people and their importance?? WHO ARE THEY??? Why should people have to be aware of their faces as they eat their meals?? is this a Soc. experiment?? maybe that's it....

As a republican, I'm pretty good at ignoring any conservative bashing that goes on (especially considering that most of my generation are flaming democrats)... I've gotta admit though, this one got to me. I think I speak for all Republicans when I humbly beg the liberals out there: "Please, PLEASE take these two- we don't want them!!!"

can i act like i give a !@$#? i really don't but ... anyway, i'm ready for the hills to wrap up like yesterday ; ( other than that, one thing of interest .. i saw an ad the other night about a new show with young fashionista kira plastinina .. looks pretty funny .. is she talented or just rich??? comedy ...

aw i love Kira, she's so cute and her designs are way better than h&m and whatever...not to mention HEIDI'S AWFUL LINE that couldn't even sell at hot topic or wherever they were trying to sell them. is the Kira show on MTV too, anyone know??

What flattering portraits. They should be on Mount Rushmore.

Okay please understand Im not a religious fanatic, but a headline that reads "God is a cruel bastard"? Cmon isnt that in poor taste t to say the very least? Even a lil bit? I kindly request that u change it. Thanks.

Dude they look downright creepy in those portraits...Why the hell would I want two creeps in a portrait staring at me while I enjoy my steak???That would just kill my appetite.

Oh dear god. Who the hell would want to see that whilst trying to eat.
Heidi is ugly as it is...but jesus that is a vile picture spencer actually looks like the more actractive half of there grusome twosome...and i actually think spencer may be the most horrible looking thing ever to be born

Oh dear god. Who the hell would want to see that whilst trying to eat.
Heidi is ugly as it is...but jesus that is a vile picture spencer actually looks like the more actractive half of there grusome twosome...and i actually think spencer may be the most horrible looking thing ever to be born

these two suck. So self absorbed and ego driven. Hes a little pussy boy and she is a fake titted, fake blond dip shit. U both can jump off a fuckin cliff