Marla Maples & Bachelor Andy: Huh? Who? What?

His boardshorts are too high, what is he 55?

Wait...

first!

what the dumb f@@k, in two years she will look like his grand ma. He's definitely messing with that just for a secure paycheck after the navy.

Technically, an Oedipal complex is fancy people talk for: Dude hates his eyes.

looks like some MILFy goodness if you ask me.

please please please please PLEASE! keep going with the old ladies in bikinis. For the last story, over the weekend, how about Kathy Bates in a thong?

She's cougarlicoius......

He's a naval physician?

Boy, when they specialize they really do specialize!

.

sweet beachyness! check out her abs!

He has an extremely caucasian way of carrying himself on the beach.

If I were her age, I'd be ecstatic to be banging her.

If...

He's hot but he's obviously wayyyyyy into himself that many women would leave him after banging him.

Thanks, I enjoyed looking at her beaver bump.

Jesus is going to fry me for that one.

This woman has the sexual power of a lioness. Look at those flanks. She'll suck out his youth and be boning 17-year old boys when she's 55.

Uh.. it's only a 12 year difference, what's the big deal, they look the same age. Women age better than men, and live longer, anyway, it's a perfect match. My mom is 10 years older than my dad and after nearly 40 years they're as happy as ever.

I'm pretty sure you wouldn't be criticizing if the man were that much older than the woman. I know this site is called the Superficial and all, but let's stick to the fashion and leave out the sexism and misogyny.

Fish is stumping Randal today with this garbage!

First, we have some African American with stuff on his teeth making wine.

Then, we have some woman that looks like Hulk Hogan with breasts.

Now, we have this no-name, generic, "I pump iron at the gym" flop.

Seriously, I'm on the road to becoming bitter and mean... like the rest of you chumps.

Randal

Can you imagine going from watching ugly old fat Donald Trump taking off his clothes, to watching that studly young doctor get naked! I bet she thinks she died and went to heaven.

God, if you're going to date an older brood, at least date one that dresses skanky, like some divorced Long Island chick, not Susie Homemaker with the 1985 style fucking two piece

We only got four minutes to save the world!

Randal

I thought Tom Brady was tapping that Brazilian granddaughter of some Nazi war criminals?

he's cut, she's old.

Randal

can we make it 2 1/2 minutes? I gotta shit first.

This dude was so boring and stupid to watch. He was a plain vanilla bachelor, not sure why he was liked the best. Listening to him talk, you'd think his brain was getting frozen mid sentence. And he is a doctor. I wouldn't want him operating on me. And if he wants to hit The Donald's sloppy 3rds, more power to to the loser.

One day you will all be old, more so those of you who live with hate in your hearts. I, on the other hand, release hate freely. Check the name, I am always laughing!!

She looks surpisingly good for a Medicare recipient.

#14 - Laura - give your dad some truth serum and the first thing he'll tell you is that he died a little every time he had to lick your mom's pancake tits and loose, gray-curlied drooping gunt.

I would pay money to watch them have sex.

Hey #15...

You know the site is called thesuperfical huh? But then you go on to rail against exactly what this site is, and is called? You are so fucking stupid I don't even know where to begin. Why don't you swing by godhatesfags.com and say you love the site, but you wish there was a little more gay friendly material.

Idiot.

He's drop dead gorgeous. I would even consider going on that hideous show to get a shot at doing something sexual with him. Marla looks good, certainly way better than that disgusting woman who won the show. God, was she fugly (Tessa was her name I think)

Hey Jim, #6 I'd like to see some Angela Lansbury bikini pics too!

reminds me of those photos that are already in the picture frames... from the '70's

She looks a helluva lot better than Heidi Montag. Damn, I'd gladly nail good ol' Marla.

#14: I'd have to completely disagree with you. Men age with distinction and generally look better with age, women just look more old and tired.

I met her before, and she's a stuck up bitch. What's a nice guy like that doing with old lady thighs? Oh, and wasn't it freezing yesterday in Laguna Beach?? Notice no one else is out there on the beach

#14 & 15 - Will you two play tonsil hockey while I make a sperm deposit on your intertwined lips?

#14 & 15 - Will you two play tonsil hockey while I make a sperm deposit on your intertwined lips?

SHE'S UGLIE AND OLD AND DOESN'T MEAT MY PERSONIAL STANDARDS :P

:( what happened to tessa??

Marla likes the beach. As I recall, she was banging the body guard on the beach at night when she was married to Trump.

So she's holding it together somewhat although she looks like she needs a little more leg work.

But hey, she's still banging body guard types out on the beach.

The more things change...

Marla looks great. I would most definitely hit that.

This guy though must realize that he isn't hot shit because Marla did claim she had the best sex ever with the Donald.

If Dina Lohan had a transfusion with the blood of twenty virgins then she and Marla would look alike. They both have chipmunk teeth. As a matter of fact, I picture both of them sitting on their haunches and chipping nervously away at some nuts. Like that guys' nuts - the one grimacing and hiding his empty nut sack.

She's a bit long in the tooth. A guy like me, thirty-something, good job in data entry, no STDs due to limited number of partners, the acne's most cleared up, high speed connection (at work) and a wide screen TV (at home), can afford to be picky. I would never do Marla! My woman would have to have a PERFECT body and be younger than me.

And Ted, you know women NEVER lie and tell a man that he's better in bed than he actually is! Especially the rich ones. Women are even more honest with rich men that poor men.

She is a nice looking lady and it is obvious that she knows when to push herself away from the plate.

Wait... I thought he went with the smart asian doctor lady. Guess she finally reclaimed her brain after spending some time away from his Guy Smiley grin and ditched his ass. Isn't he a Navy officer? Shouldn't his ass be on a boat somewhere defending freedom, not chasing menopausal women?

Cut the guy some slack. He's not marrying her.....just hittin' it for a bit. She's doable, so why not?

Nothing less sexy in this world than an old woman who was once hot.

#14 Ummm, That's just completely wrong, but go ahead and keep telling yourself that. I'm sure you're quite the cougar.

Just me, or does he have a bizarre looking torso?

great legs

It should be a Federal law - or at least an NFL rule - that every 43 year old woman looks like *that* body RIGHT THERE.

Together their IQ likely equals the length of his penis multiplied by her bra size divided by the sum of teeth veneers plus total BFI.

I'd pump her holes fulla fuck juice for sure!!!! Come on, you know 43 year old cougars do the DIIRRRRRRRRRRTIEST stuff under the sun... I'm talkin about the ball sucking and ass rimming diaries... Not to mention she prolly screams "fuck my 43 year old asshole" at the top of her ancient lungs!!!! Dude!!! Unbelievable.

Nick Nolte (52) is a smart man. I would most certainly stick my tongue into this woman's asshole. That is all.

. Barack - April 4, 2008 2:47 PM

He has an extremely caucasian way of carrying himself on the beach.
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If I said this shit about black ppl there'd be an uproar of "you're so racist"!!! Yea, as a white person I have to say, this dude acts like a stupid fucking cracker, but then again, so does Barack Obama...

I would like to sleep with both of them.. they're looking so good, so sexy..

I totally support you # 15. # 28 can go fuck himself.

Women do not age better than men. Once we hit menopause the estrogen goes away and we dry out, essentially.

It is going to suck.

She looks good, why not? Big fat uglyold men with pot bellies can parade around with sexy girls half their age, but once an older ( and still very attractive) woman does it, it's a big hullaballoo...

Should we women just commit suicide on our fortieth birthday? Wait...don't answer that!!!

Fuck it.

He knows the secret; older women really know what they're doing.

Like where to find the best deals on Metamucil.

#58,
Don't DO IT aja!!!! I love 40 and 50 year-old women... more so than 20 and 30 year-old women. They're more fun in the rack and at the dinner table.

i think iti is a ashton thing

Tessa was way better.

Say what you want, but I saw her in Santa Barbara last year and she looks A-mazing!!! If I look like that at 43, I can die happy. BTW - the daughter, ugh. Donald with blond hair, unfotch!

Wow, I guess he was lying about wanting children. This shows how truly superficial he is. He wants to date an old gold digger who ripped up a marriage and dated an old asshole. It's funny how people can appear sincere on t.v. and then end up being gold digging fame whore douchebags. The bachelor show is so stupid because not one of those guys stayed with the girl they picked (except for that one guy who picked Mary, who ended in jail for beating him! WTF).

She looks terrific for someone of 43 yo.. Eat that Miss Bikini New York.

Janine I think The Bachelor is an amazing show. Each person is amazing. It's amazing that you don't see that. I think they are both amazing. Have an amazing weekend.

Great. Now global warming is f'ing with our pseudo-celebrity penises. NOW it's time to do something.

OMG- she's the hottest 42 yo you've posted yet.
I think they are a perfect couple. Less drama with older women (usually).

um 43...whatever... even more impressive

wonder why he still has pictures of tessa on his website. oh well, i still think he was the best bachelor of all time.

They look so happily!If you are single now,or if you are looking for your lover,I think you would come to "SeekingRich.com".On "SeekingRich.com",there are many beautiful girls and rich,handsome men,they want to find more friends,find their lover.On that website,they make friends each other.

What the..he is NOT hot. He looks like an asshole who is REALLY into himself. She looks nice..though I have no idea who she is, haha. NO, she looks really good for her age.

Picky and Proud: Wait, you are actually citing your internet service and tv as qualities worth boasting about, and which you believe entitle you to selectivity in a mate? Ummm ... I guess we should interpret that as "a perfect body and no brain."

OH HELL YEAH! i agree with the one who could pay to watch them have sex. Jesus, are they hot or what? They make me think of Barbie and Ken, finally ageing decently and properly. She is so cute still for her age, and he's just a fuckin yummy hunk with a lot of money and goodies to spoil her all the way. Lucky bitch.
I hate how perfect celebrities can get sometimes.

She looks great to be 43..it is just that horrid 80's Hair..that I am not fond of!

Does she not remind any one else of Dina Lohan (but with a better body of course)???
BTW, I went to high school with that guy Andy. Super prep.

All of the Baldwins are dead?!?!?

andy is gay, chill out. this is a publicity stunt for the secret talents of stars reality show. since marla didn't have any talent, they are trying to make one fast.

I'd hit it.