January 19, 2007
Jessica and Ashlee Simpson are matching clowns

Jessica and Ashlee Simpson were spotted leaving Koi together wearing matching red lipstick on their face. Although to stand out, Jessica thought she'd attend dinner looking like a tranny. Mission status? Accomplished.
Thanks to the oddly named Jelly for the tip.
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Comments
1. Posted by Danner on January 19, 2007 8:12 AM
LOL
Street whores!
2. Posted by BarbadoSlim on January 19, 2007 8:12 AM
So papa joe had a nice freaky three way then.
3. Posted by ~!@#$%^&* on January 19, 2007 8:14 AM
"Jessica, point to your penis, sweetie!"
4. Posted by NipsyHustle on January 19, 2007 8:18 AM
hooker dee and hooker dumb. you figure it out.
5. Posted by magickal on January 19, 2007 8:20 AM
~Boo~Snicker~Hisssssss!!!
I hate these two. Although, Ashless looks much, much prettier after all the plastic surgery. But nothing can fix the look of pathetic washed up failure on Jess.
6. Posted by misanthrope on January 19, 2007 8:20 AM
Joe Simpson must be using red lipstick on his dick.
7. Posted by magickal on January 19, 2007 8:21 AM
Woops ~ AshLEE not AshLESS. Although, ASSless would have been appropriate.
8. Posted by anothershityear on January 19, 2007 8:48 AM
this looks like a contest:
how much untalented disappointing failure can possibly be crammed into a single photo?
(answer: with these two alone, a hell of a lot)
the chick in the background looked better than either of these two in her day, and by the looks of it didn't need a plastic nose to do it
and btw, jess. simpson is around 5'1" right?
and she's towering over the dee-clown (thx #4 hilarious!) in this pic
how (non-) tall is a. simpson?? 4'7"????
9. Posted by DrunkBlogger on January 19, 2007 8:49 AM
I had a 3some with them and now both of my balls are bright red!!! Hey-oh!!! Unfunny joke!!!!
10. Posted by anothershityear on January 19, 2007 8:53 AM
j. simps. looks like freddy mercury in a blonde wig in this pic
(sorry freddy -- no offense)
#2 & #6 good ones, always up for creepy-ass joe-s humor
ok enough bullshitting around, back to my shit-job now
11. Posted by MissLaVey on January 19, 2007 8:54 AM
Who the hell still wears red lipstick, anyway? I always thought it looked like hell on 99% of people.
12. Posted by danielle on January 19, 2007 8:55 AM
They've got to be the fugliest pair of sister's on the market to date. No, wait. The Olsen Smurf's top that list...then the Simpsons. Or maybe it's the Olsen's, Hilton's and then the Simpson's.
Hell...
Just throw a wet brick at each of 'em to even the playing field.
13. Posted by Pointandlaugh on January 19, 2007 8:57 AM
oooooooo how F-ing HOT would it be to get a 3-some with those whores? Seriously. Holy shit. I would tap those asses with the finesse of Ike Turner.
14. Posted by wedgeone on January 19, 2007 9:08 AM
"Jess? Jess is dead, my friend. You can call me Joker and as you can see I'm a lot happier."
One more thing: "this world needs an enema" starting with these two.
15. Posted by Jacquelantern on January 19, 2007 9:17 AM
Ashlee is way hotter than Jessica.
16. Posted by ming on January 19, 2007 9:18 AM
wait...isn't that marilyn manson and his new girlfriend?
17. Posted by jrzmommy on January 19, 2007 9:20 AM
I've been unable to comment because I keep falling asleep when I look at this thread.
18. Posted by cruzin333 on January 19, 2007 9:29 AM
American Idol recently held auditions in Seattle with a woman who strikingly resembled these two Simpsons, with the fire hydrant red lipstick and a "sexy" look, the whole deal.
She sang "Don't Cha" (wish your girlfriend was hot like me...) and I bet she was even as good a singer as these girls. *(sarcasm)*
Shocking, I know.
19. Posted by GeannaSparrow on January 19, 2007 9:31 AM
Haaaa. Jessica looks like a damn flasher.
20. Posted by 86 on January 19, 2007 9:37 AM
Trannies!!!!!!!!!!!
21. Posted by Mo on January 19, 2007 9:44 AM
Somebody's been playing in Cameron Diaz' closets again.
22. Posted by google on January 19, 2007 9:48 AM
Ok, something more entertaining - this may be the greatest illegal performance-enhancing drug story ever in the history of sports:
"AC Milan striker Marco Boriello tested positive for cortisone after his side was beaten 2-1 by Roma last November... But he blamed his girlfriend, Argentine model Belen Rodriguez, 22, for his positive result in the test due to a cream she used to cure a vaginal infection - which he unwittingly "ingested" whilst paying attention to the aforementioned part of her rather delectable anatomy. Though it probably wasn't that delectable at the time, hence the cream. A cunning excuse for sure."
http://www.tuttogossip.com/foto-vip/Foto-Belen-Rodriguez.php
23. Posted by 86 on January 19, 2007 9:53 AM
I wouldn't stand right next to Ashlee if I was Jessica.
24. Posted by BarbadoSlim on January 19, 2007 9:54 AM
@22...He's using the "my girlfriend's twat" defense. How considerate of him, and classy.
25. Posted by Dean on January 19, 2007 9:55 AM
I wonder if one put the lipstick on, they made out, then it was on both of them...
26. Posted by jrzmommy on January 19, 2007 10:06 AM
"My Girlfriend's Taco Has Too Much Cheese: A Step-by-Step Guide to Self-Ruination of Every Man's Dream of Fucking a Super Model"......by Marco Boriello
27. Posted by jesseeca on January 19, 2007 10:10 AM
jessica looks possesed, ashley looks like she's on something & they both look like jessica's dog. run a comb through that mess! or maybe they're both wearing one of jessica's wigs.
28. Posted by biatcho on January 19, 2007 10:15 AM
#22 That was excellent. Just another fucking cheating Italian Footballer.
They should be banned from Champions League play I say!
29. Posted by misanthrope on January 19, 2007 10:18 AM
@22... His gal's fun time area must be pretty alluring if he went on ahead and visited it with vaginal cream and all. And quite passive-aggressive on her part.... 'Should I tell him or should I let the asshole eat yeast cream?'
30. Posted by ch474 on January 19, 2007 10:21 AM
Time for a visit from Miss Cairol for these two.
31. Posted by cole007 on January 19, 2007 10:34 AM
oh god, they want to be the olsen twins so bad they can hardly stand it!
HAHRHAHRHAHAHAH!HH!H!!
32. Posted by Peter Coffin on January 19, 2007 10:51 AM
Holy shit... Ashlee looks nothing like she used to. That is scary.
33. Posted by wedgeone on January 19, 2007 11:04 AM
@22 - Thanks for making the thread attached to this useless article worth rereading. Anyone want to take bets on when Beckham pulls this excuse out when he starts his soccer career in the US?
I say before the end of the 2007 season, we all find learn that Posh's snatch is mean & green.
34. Posted by wedgeone on January 19, 2007 11:05 AM
"finally learn", not find learn.
Sorry.
35. Posted by F-Sucker on January 19, 2007 11:50 AM
Just throw me in between them with some Jello.
36. Posted by BarbadoSlim on January 19, 2007 12:02 PM
This is very difficult for me but, this is how I feel about Victoria Beckham: I'd rather risk my life hitting Paris' fetid rathole than hit that sour Highlander cunt.
*shudders*
37. Posted by HollyJ on January 19, 2007 12:21 PM
Anyone who thinks they're opposed to cosmetic surgery needs to seriously reconsider after seeing these two next to each other BEFORE and AFTER. Ashlee's gorgeous now. I glad she cut off her beak. But I hate both of their chin butts.
38. Posted by jraleigh on January 19, 2007 12:51 PM
Does anyone else notice that it looks like Jessica is trying to masturbate through her coat?
39. Posted by spunkbubble on J.alba's face on January 19, 2007 3:32 PM
who'da thunk that Ashlee would be hotter with her sister? She was only one nose job away this entire time.
40. Posted by Butterfly on January 19, 2007 5:47 PM
Why didn't someone tell these two to blot their lips. It looks like they're wearing those wax lips!
41. Posted by bootrungar on January 19, 2007 5:52 PM
the next Barbi twins have arrived
42. Posted by Dejasade on January 19, 2007 5:53 PM
OH GOOOODDDDDDDD THEY ARE SOOOOOOO GROOOOOOOSSSSSS!! DISGUSTING TRAILER TRASH CLOWNS HAHAHA. They are BOTH SO DESPERATE, TOO!!!!!!!!!
43. Posted by dystopia on January 19, 2007 7:47 PM
With that sneer, Jessica looks like the Joker. Only uglier.
44. Posted by shofaz on January 20, 2007 12:28 AM
Jessica is so f*ckin' ugly!!! OMG botox is eating her face... gross!!!
Ashlee is the perfect example of how a plastic surgery can be something good for ugly people. Sometimes. She looks beautiful. Only that poor Jess is completely the opposite. Bad surgery happens, you know... look at her!!!
45. Posted by Fetusiastic on January 20, 2007 8:16 AM
Está claro, son tendencias sectarias.
46. Posted by you_betcha_iris on January 20, 2007 5:43 PM
26: that was rotten dot com :) LOVES IT
47. Posted by pookiedoo on January 20, 2007 6:53 PM
Jess looks like she's trying to surreptitiously adjust her maxipad. Maybe that's NOT lipstick on their lips.
I must vomit now.
48. Posted by allgravybaby on January 20, 2007 8:35 PM
FAKE HAIR
FAKE LIPS
FAKE NOSES..
enough said
49. Posted by Nikky Raney on January 21, 2007 10:11 AM
ashlee looks so different since her surgery
50. Posted by wedgeone on January 21, 2007 5:31 PM
#45 - Que'?
51. Posted by sigmanu on January 22, 2007 9:48 PM
JESSICA IS A MAN I SWEAR. ASHLEE IS HOT NOW I'D BANG HER JUST LIKE NICK CARTER DID.