Dec 14 2008Elisha Cuthbert's ex Sean Avery kicked off NHL team
After receiving a six-game suspension for publicly calling Elisha Cuthbert "sloppy seconds," Sean Avery is now officially kicked off the Dallas Stars, according to ESPN:
"All parties said there is a clear understanding that a return to the Stars is not in the best interest of either the hockey club or Avery," the team said in a news release.
Details of his departure still must be worked out. He could be traded, sent to the minors or bought out next summer. The club said it will work with Avery to try making this an amicable divorce.
However, there's no telling when Avery will even be ready to play again. He is at an undisclosed location seeking treatment through a program set up by the NHL players association. When he was suspended, Avery told the Stars he needed help dealing with anger issues.
Damn. Apparently, Elisha Cuthbert has some crazy pull over the NHL - or maybe her vagina does, eh? High five!
UPDATE: I've just been kicked out of the NHL. Great. Now how am I supposed to shoot a winning slap shot and gain the lusty approval of a lonely Sarah Palin whose husband is away on business because he doesn't appreciate her new jugs? Curse you, Cuthbert, you dream killer!
Continue Reading "Elisha Cuthbert's ex Sean Avery kicked off NHL team"
Dec 3 2008Elisha Cuthbert's ex suspended from hockey for calling her 'sloppy seconds'
Sean Avery of the Dallas Stars has been suspended indefinitely from the National Hockey League after publicly referring to Elisha Cuthbert as "sloppy seconds." She's currently dating Dion Phaneuf of the Calgary Flames. While talking to reporters yesterday, Sean made the following off-hand remarks, according to Us Magazine:
"I am really happy to be back in Calgary, I love Canada," he said. "I just want to comment on how it's become like a common thing in the NHL for guys to fall in love with my sloppy seconds. I don't know what that's about. Enjoy the game tonight."
After the National Hockey League suspended him for "inappropriate public comments," Avery -- who served as an intern at Vogue this past year -- now has to meet with Commissioner Gary Bettman, who will determine any additional penalty.
"I completely support the league's decision to suspend Sean Avery," Stars owner Tom Hicks said in a statement. "Had the league not have suspended him, the Dallas Stars would have. This organization will not tolerate such behavior, especially from a member of our hockey team. We hold our team to a higher standard and will continue to do so."
So, apparently hockey is a gentleman's sport now? Huh. I must be confused by all the punching and knocking out of teeth. Interesting. If that's the case, why not make the players wear tuxes and top hats? You know, keep things classy. Then, if your teammate makes unsavory comments about a former lover, you can slap them in the face with your gloves and demand satisfaction. Which is also why everybody gets a pistol. Hear, hear!
Thanks to Ryan who's been known to seduce a young lady or two with the simple twist of his monocle.
Continue Reading "Elisha Cuthbert's ex suspended from hockey for calling her 'sloppy seconds'"
