Nov 21 2009Miranda Kerr and a bunch of chicks are topless
These are handouts from the 2010 Pirelli Calendar Launch Party in London last night, and I'm not pointing any fingers here, but had Summit Entertainment passed out free porn, maybe I would've came to their little launch event this week. -- Okay, you're right, I still wouldn't have shown up, but I might have sent an intern with a duffel bag and instructions to get Ashley Greene's phone number because apparently she's the easy one. So put that in your marketing pipe and smoke it.
Scope Out (12) Pics of the 2010 Pirelli Calendar After the Jump
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Nov 20 2009The 2009 Victoria's Secret Fashion Show
If you don't like looking at insanely hot women in lingerie, now would be a good time to go see New Moon and/or become a People subscriber. These are shots from last night's 2009 Victoria's Secret Fashion Show, and I started things off with Alessandra Ambrosio and Marisa Miller who seem to be engaged in some sort of epic ab battle where the only real loser is all of us who will never get to touch them. -- Wow, I honestly didn't set out to drive people to suicide, yet here we are. My bad.
- Added Miranda Kerr whose ass should've been the top pic. I've failed you.
- Added Selita Ebanks because I hope Nick Cannon is reading and sobbing in his butler outfit. This isn't how you make Mariah's sandwich.
- Added Doutzen Kroes. Do I really have to explain why?
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Oct 25 2009Miranda Kerr has a fashionable ass
Here's Miranda Kerr in the November issue of V, and she should probably only be photographed at this angle from here on out. So who do I talk to to make that happen? There some sort of art czar in Washington or something, and more importantly, can he/she use military action to enforce strict compliance? We're talking about art, dammit!
Pic links to LSFW version.
Oct 15 2009Hang on, Balloon Boy! Miranda Kerr's coming!
You're a little late, Miranda. so I'm going to have to stare at your ass now. Balloon Boy would've wanted it that way may he rest in peace - at the neighbor's house playing Xbox. You can come out now, dude. We've all watched your YouTube video and it's pretty obvious your dad's not going to ground you. In fact, he says you can have your gun back. No foolin'.
UPDATE: And the little scamp was in a box in the attic. Ha, kids. Always causing national dramas.
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Sep 9 2009Miranda Kerr is chesty and other news
- Nicole Kidman has finally Botoxed her way to a third lip. [Lainey Gossip]
- Katherine Heigl is adopting a baby. How long until she teaches it to badmouth Judd Apatow, Grey's Anatomy and pretty much anyone who will keep mommy relevant? [PopEater]
- John Mayer might also be having sex with Kristin Cavallari. I won't believe it until he Twitters/blogs/makes a viral video/gives a TMZ press conference about it. Ha ha. He loves himself. [Celebslam]
- Whitney Port is single. Hey, John Mayer, found another one for you! [PopSugar]
- Kate Moss made a drunken scene at the GQ awards in London last night. Of course, nobody saw it because she was standing behind a cocktail stirrer. [Celebitchy]
- Rosie O'Donnell and Star Jones are saying "Fuck you, Barbara Walters" by starting their own talk show. [ICYDK]
- Hugh Hefner will attend Kendra Wilkinson's baby shower presumably for one last diaper change. She always used the right amount of powder. [Wonderwall]
Aug 4 2009Miranda Kerr's camel toe and other news
- Demi Moore's face is worth every cent. All 8,823,983,438,736 of them. [Lainey Gossip]
- Jennifer Aniston is fine with being alone. Really, it doesn't bother her. I mean, it's not like she brings it up every goddamn interview until the end of time. She's tough. [PopEater]
- Jessica Simpson's new reality show requires $25,000 worth of hair and make-up. Per episode. Who the fuck is her stylist? Peter Jackson? [Celebslam]
- Xavier Samuel is your new Twilight obsession. Ten bucks says he loses a testicle at Starbucks within the week. Who wants in? [Just Jared]
- Ashlee Simpson has never met anyone "stronger" than Jessica. No, really. She once saw Jessica chew through a hubcap after divorcing Nick Lachey. She thought it was a cookie. [ICYDK]
- Britney Spears scored seven VMA nominations thus reminding everyone that MTV is an irrelevant conglomerate of asshats. [PopSugar]
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Aug 3 2009Miranda Kerr in a bikini
Here's Miranda Kerr on a photo shoot at the Bondi Icebergs in Sydney yesterday. Granted, these are slightly anticlimactic after seeing her topless last week, I'm not to look a gift horse in the mouth. Mostly because those hoofed bastards eat people. I'm on to you!
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Jul 27 2009Miranda Kerr's topless photo shoot
Here's a topless Miranda Kerr posing for a Victoria's Secret photo shoot in the Caribbeans. So, wait, is she selling a bathing suit with no top? Because if that's the case, I'd like to tell every (attractive) woman I know that this is what you wear to find a husband. You may have heard differently, but trust me, that person was lying and also trying to steal your Future Man. That bitch!
NOTE: Pics link to NSFW versions of I Hate You, Orlando Bloom.
