Nov 21 2009Levi Johnston in Playgirl
Here's the much-ballyhooed but penis-less Levi Johnston Playgirl.com shoot that made its way online today. Normally I don't post on Saturdays, but after the veritable tit barrage yesterday, I figured the least I could do is give the man-hungry demographic a little love. Now that that's out of the way, can someone explain to me why Levi Johnston is using his own hands to cover his genitals or am I the only one with a chorus of tiny angels that does that for me? "ALLELUIA!" Hey, knock it off. I didn't say the magic word yet, and we're nowhere near the front window at Starbuc- Whoa, look at that chick. "ALLELUIA! ALLELUIA! ALLELUIA-ALLEUIA!"
UPDATE: Photos removed by request but you can still see them at Playgirl.com.
Aug 10 2009Kim Kardsashian is blonde and other news
- Kathy Griffin brought Levi Johnston as her date to the Teen Choice Awards. Was this an object lesson for the kids about cougars' old age making them infertile so you don't even have to bother with a condom? Because that's what I picked up. [PopEater]
- Halle Berry is pregnant again? But how?! We haven't made love since that time I wrote the words "Halle" on a bagel. [A Socialite's Life]
- Ashley Greene was caught making out with Chace Crawford this morning. Was that before or after she leaked nude pictures of herself? [Lainey Gossip]
- Natasha Henstridge is making me reconsider women over 30. (But 35's the cut off. Seriously.) [Celebslam]
- Milo Ventimiglia shirtless. In case you're into that sort of thing. (Read: The bare chest of a midget fucker.) [Just Jared]
- Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt keep the sparks alive. Until later that night when they realize that wasn't a lumpy pillow it was Maddox the whole time. "Ha ha! We need to start giving these kids away." [PopSugar]
- Dane Cook booed at the Teen Choice Awards. Wow. I suddenly don't fear the future anymore. It's going to be okay! [The Blemish]
May 31 2009Levi Johnston poses shirtless for GQ
Here's Levi Johnston, the kid who knocked up Sarah Palin's daughter Bristol just in time for her vice-presidential nomination, posing shirtless for GQ with baby Tripp. While the article was an interesting read, I don't know what to make of these photos except I'm pretty sure allowing your infant son to appear naked in a widely-circulated men's magazine probably won't ease the Palin's visitation restrictions. Then again, he did pose with a gun, so we'll call this one a wash.
Apr 8 2009Hugh Jackman thinks he's so tough...
- Hugh Jackman arrives at the Sydney premiere of Wolverine by jumping out of a helicopter. Somebody should put this guy in one of those superhero movies. [Vulture]
- Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick are finally divorcing. He wants to date other women while she just wants to realize her dream of competing in the Kentucky Derby. Don't stop believing! [Allie is Wired]
- Levi Johnston continues to battle Sarah Palin in the press. Wants people to know he's not white trash, he just likes huntin', fishin' and knockin' bitches up. That's all. [Jezebel]
- Hugh Laurie is not a fan of pranks on the set of House. Then again his mother was killed by a marching band hiding inside an elevator, so I can see how this might offend him. [Videogum]
- Keith Urban scores a threesome with his wife Nicole Kidman and Taylor Swift. He was just about to quit country music altogether, but it turns out it can get you laid - and this time not with a relative. [Best Week Ever]
Apr 3 2009Levi Johnston: 'Sarah Palin knew Bristol and I were having sex'
- Levi Johnston tells Tyra Banks Sarah Palin "probably knew" he was having sex with Bristol because they shared a room. Wow. Have you actually spent time with this woman? Because you'd know she thought you were just praying. Or loading an assault rifle. Either one. [Just Jared]
- Britney Spears' stop at a Dallas nightclub ends with employees being threatened if they talk to the press. Great, now we'll never know how many people her vagina killed. But I'm guessing eight. [Radar Online]
- Zach Braff and Dax Shepard are now virtually interchangeable. Who didn't see that coming? Including the blind. [Best Week Ever]
- Ben Affleck taught his daughter Violet how to swear in German. Yeah, well, Britney Spears lets her kids use the car to pick up smokes. Try again, Daredevil. [I'm Not Obsessed]
- Hugh Jackman's quasi-visible ass in Wolverine. Now I'm really excited to see this movie! I mean, a guy I know is. The, uh, Writerficial Super. Yeah, him. [Pink is the New Blog]
Dec 30 2008Sarah Palin's daughter gives birth
Sarah Palin's unwed teenage daughter Bristol Palin gave birth to a baby boy Saturday, according to People:
"We think it's wonderful," said Colleen Jones, the sister of Bristol's grandmother Sally Heath, who confirmed the news. "The baby is fine and Bristol is doing well. Everyone is excited."
The baby's name is Tripp Easton Mitchell Johnston and he was born at 5:30 a.m., according to Jones.
Tripp? Seriously? I don't get why Bristol's being subtle. She might as well name her son "Hey, mom, I smoke my face off and have unprotected sex with my redneck boyfriend every time you're at church." I mean, it's Sarah Palin we're talking about here. She's just gonna call the kid a "Maverick" then give him a handgun to play with. "Aw, is there anything more adorable? *BAM* That dog was getting old anyway. *BAM* Hey, it's not like I can't remarry. *BAM* Oh, boy, I get to meet Jesus!"
