Dec 4 2008Jack Black as Jesus in 'Prop 8 - The Musical'

Here's a bunch of Hollywood actors, including Jack Black as Jesus Christ, in a musical about Proposition 8. I guarantee you this will win people over because there's nothing folks love more than that blonde chick from Scrubs and the guy from Talladega Nights singing with Doogie Howser. Seriously, with production values like these, I'll vote for anything they tell me to. Mandatory testicle removal? Shit, if The West Wing's Allison Janney says so, sign me up!

For the record: The Superficial Writer does NOT support Prop 8, but more vehemently opposes asinine political endorsements from celebrities. (With the obvious exception of Mr. T.)

Nov 30 2008Ben Stiller, Jack Black, P. Diddy dye their pubes (Those words just happened.)

Nancy Jarecki is an entrepreneur who sells dye for "hair down there." While her product line Betty Beauty is taking off, Nancy needs to learn rule number one in the cutthroat pube dye business: Never out your celebrity clients. Page Six reports:

It's not just women who are interested in matching the carpet to the drapes: Jarecki says so many men have bought the product that she plans to launch a "Betty for Men" line early next year. "I guess man-scaping for guys is really big these days," she says, adding that she recently sent the entire assortment of colors to noted waxing enthusiast Diddy and got back a thank-you note from his assistant.
A Betty spokesperson adds that "Law & Order" brunette Mariska Hargitay, country singer Vince Gill, Jack Black and Ben Stiller and Christine Taylor also use the product.

For the record, I fancy myself a man-scaping enthusiast as well. Which is why my dude shrub comes complete with a gazebo, lawn gnome and barbecue pit. Also, cookout next Friday. BYOB. (There will be badminton.)

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Jun 2 2008MTV Movie Awards: Celebs did a bunch of crap but nothing as cool as Robert Downey Jr. attacking Jack Black's nutsicles

I attempted to watch the MTV Movie awards last night but quickly realized, "Hey, I don't completely hate myself." Before I turned it off though, I did happen to catch this clip of Robert Downey Jr., Jack Black and Ben Stiller trying to make a viral video for their new movie Tropic Thunder. Surprisingly hilarious. If you guys want more info on the awards and whatnot, steer your browsers over to our sister site I Watch Stuff later today. Whenever my esteemed colleague crawls out from under his Ricky Gervais sheets, he'll bring you the 411 on the night's asinine events. Provided he didn't drink a half gallon of Clorox five minutes into it.

UPDATE: Aforementioned coverage up at I Watch Stuff. Be the first in your office to know that Transformers is the greatest movie ever, according to a random selection of 13-year-olds with Internet access.

May 14 2008Angelina Jolie confirms she's having twins

Angelina Jolie confirmed today that she is definitely sporting double fetuseses. She had no choice in the matter after Jack Black accidentally spilled the beans then sang a goofy song with his guitar. Us Magazine reports:

Jolie confirmed the news that has long been rumored: she and beau Brad Pitt are expecting twins. Her Kung Fu Panda co-star Jack Black let the news slip during an interview about the movie that took place this afternoon at the Cannes Film Festival in France.

For those keeping score at home, this brings the Pitt-Jolie's one baby closer to TOTAL WORLD DOMINATION. Better start brushing up on your Pitt-Jolie-ese. Feel free to practice by translating the following examples. (Hint: Don't forget to conjugate the verbs.):

1. Baby uterus adopt the ridiculously good looking with the procreate.
2. Monster boobs!
3. Charity UN the fallopian tube Brad pecs.
4. What the fuck happened to Ed Norton's career?

Answer Key: 1. Please put mustard on my sandwich. 2. Hello! (Formal.) 3. The bathroom is the second door to the left. 4. What the fuck happened to Ed Norton's career?

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