Oct 14 2009Ivanka Trump knows how to sell a book and other news
- Tracy Morgan shits on his old SNL castmates in his new book. [PopEater]
- George Clooney's new girlfriend will fucking cut you. [Lainey Gossip]
- Khloe Kardashian hasn't figured out she's not the hot sister yet. [Drunken Stepfather: Site is NSFW]
- Maria Shriver is from a political dynasty. Go ahead and try to give her a ticket. I dare you. [Celebslam]
- Marc Anthony brought Jennifer Lopez to the White House last night to discuss outlawing the power of Greyskull and shirtless dudes with swords. [PopSugar]
- Megan Fox will be the new face of Armani because her career has imploded to Victoria Beckham-status. That was quick. [Wonderwall]
- Leona Lewis was randomly punched in the face during a book signing. Did she not follow the Ivanka Trump method? Because an occasional grope is always better than a fist in the mouth. That's just smart business. [ICYDK]
Continue Reading "Ivanka Trump knows how to sell a book and other news"
Jul 16 2009Pamela Anderson is classy and other news
- Ivanka Trump is engaged. Great. Now where am I going to find a young, billionaire sugar mama with awesome breasts? Even if Donald makes another baby today, I'll be almost 50 by the time's it 18 which means I'll have to be the rich one. Stupid cockblocking capitalism, I hate you! [PopEater]
- Adrian Grenier and Ashley Greene continue to pretend they're not dating. Sort of like how Emmanuelle Chriqui and me are rocking it. I mean, not rocking it. Wink. [Lainey Gossip]
- Michael Jackson apparently had an insane collection of naked actresses from the 20s to today. -- Christ, he was misunderstood. [The Blemish]
- Gerard Butler is getting tired of rumors that he's dating Jennifer Aniston. For the last time, people, he's only sleeping with her when he's drunk. How about a little respect? [Just Jared]
- Batista of the WWE rocks a Speedo on the beach if you're into that sort of thing. Rupert Everett. I went there. [Celebslam]
- Taylor Lautner talks about bulking up so he could keep his role in New Moon. Meanwhile, Robert Pattinson skipped showering for the eighth day in a row and banged 25 women in his hotel room because the universe is a bitch. [PopSugar]
- David Beckham's kids want tattoos just like him. Really? Have they looked at their mother? Because that's what David's tattoos got him: Falcor with Breast Inflating Action. [ICYDK]
Apr 2 2008Ivanka Trump: For your dating consideration
Ivanka Trump the 26-year-old daughter of Donald and Ivana Trump is back on the market. And unlike another certain heiress we know, Ivanka is STD-free and runs her own mortgage empire. (Read: She'll buy you a Wii.) Page Six reports:
We noticed Trump - who had been dating real estate mogul and New York Observer owner Jared Kushner for almost a year - was flying solo at a few recent soirees, and friends of the couple confirmed yesterday to Page Six that the power couple are no longer together.
I don't think many of us common Joes stand a chance. Ivanka's probably looking for a guy that's A.) super loaded. and B.) has testicles made of Faberge eggs. Sadly, mine are only lined with diamonds. God, I suck.
Continue Reading "Ivanka Trump: For your dating consideration"
Jul 10 2007Ivanka Trump too sexy for The View
Ivanka Trump, the Vice President of real estate development and acquisitions for her father's company, says there's no way she'd co-host The View even though Page Six reported she was among the candidates being considered to replace Rosie O'Donnell. During an interview with Ryan Seacrest on KIIS FM today, Ivanka said:
"There's zero chance I would do that. I'm working on the sexiest projects around the world. So to me to be on a television show every single day at a designated period of time just wouldn't work for my schedule."
I'm not entirely sure what kind of sexy projects Ivanka Trump is working on. She's in real estate so, you know, that's kind of weird. She probably shows up to meetings and everybody is in business suits and she's wearing a push-up bra and pink robe. Although I still find it hard to believe somebody this attractive came from Donald Trump. It's like finding out Jessica Alba's dad is Jabba the Hutt.
Apr 23 2007Ivanka Trump looks sharp
Ivanka Trump showed up to Good Morning with Mike and Juliette at Fox New York City wearing a gigantic wrinkled suit. I don't know which thought horrifies me more, that she's actually wearing her dad's suit or that this thing actually fits her. If she showed up to a meeting dressed like this everybody would think she was representing some sort of clown college.
Feb 5 2007Andy Dick tries to molest Ivanka Trump
Andy Dick was dragged off Jimmy Kimmel Live last week after he kept touching Ivanka Trump. It's especially pathetic because you know this is him trying to prove he's straight. Only he has no idea how to be straight, so this is what he learned from a book. Probably the same one Tom Cruise read.
Jan 30 2007Ivanka Trump has ridiculous boobs
Ivanka Trump showed up to the 50th Annual International Red Cross Ball sporting some super lopsided breasts. I mean, really, when your dad's a billionaire you can probably afford a decent plastic surgeon. You don't have to go to that guy who meets you in the alley behind 7-Eleven and keeps his surgical tools tied to his donkey. Christ, a platypus could've done a better job. And they don't even have thumbs.
Oct 31 2006Ivanka Trump and Topher Grace get it on
Ivanka Trump has squashed rumors she's with Lance Armstrong with even stranger rumors that she's with Topher Grace. She celebrated her 25th birthday in Las Vegas over the weekend and reportedly spent Saturday night with Topher.
They canoodled on the balcony during dinner at Social House with a group including Grace's former co-star Wilmer Valderrama. Then, at nightclub Pure, they closed the curtains around their private table for a half-hour. The couple "never left each other's sides," said our source.
And here's Ivanka at her birthday party at Pure looking a bit more like Paris Hilton than anybody should ever look. There's been rumors going around that she got breast implants and while I can't confirm them, I can confirm that her bumblebee suit makes her look like she belongs in a Martin Scorsese movie doing a line of coke and telling Robert DeNiro she'd like to go out for a night on the town.
