Jan 22 2009Plastic Surgery Gone WTF Part 2: Another Sequel Without Katie Holmes
Welcome to The Superficial's Gallery of Celebs Trying to Cheat Nature But Instead Looking Like Quasimodo's Inbred Cousin, Fullmodo. You guys had such a blast with the last gallery, we decided to give it another go. So, who's inside? Not even the greatest minds know for sure. But I bet Janice Dickinson's first - because I'm psychic, ladies?
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Jan 8 2009The Superficial presents Plastic Surgery Gone WTF
Welcome to The Superficial's Gallery of Mangled Celebs. Here you'll find a pictorial cavalcade of stars (With bitching commentary of course.) who thought they could cheat nature but ended up looking like, well, see for yourself....
Click here for an experience that makes Nip/Tuck look like just a show about plastic surgery.
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Dec 23 2008Danielle Lloyd proves the British have true grasp on meaning of Christmas
Anyone else think Former Miss Britain Danielle Lloyd has the face of a retarded Drew Barrymore? Redundant, I know, and also a trick question. Danielle Lloyd doesn't even have a face. Ha! Can't believe you fell for that.
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Dec 19 2008Halle Berry knows how to win Oscars
Here's a scantily-clad Halle Berry filming her new movie Frankie and Alice in Vancouver, and scope out the synopsis for this movie from Variety:
Story follows a young woman struggling with multiple personality disorder and torn between who she is and a racist Caucasian alter-personality that preys upon her mind.
So, think the boob-flashing of Swordfish meets that time your cousin brought his new black girlfriend to Thanksgiving dinner, and your grandfather said "Hey, look a colored person!" Which you silently laughed at in your head, while out loud saying "Alright, who stole his meds again?"
They should use that on the poster.
NOTE: Pics link to NSFW versions that are not screen grabs from Rocks: The Whitney Houston Story.
Dec 17 2008Nicola McLean brings cups of holiday cheer
Dear Santa,
Please forgive me for the short notice, but I'm writing to request a last minute alteration to my Christmas list. Please replace the following item:
A Pitt-Jolie child dressed as an Ewok complete with spear to attack my enemies.
With:
British Ultimo Lingerie model Nicola McLean despite the stretch marks that I'm sensitive and caring enough to look past because her breasts are ginormous.
My apologies again for such short notice, and I promise I won't roofie up the cookies this year then hold your sack ransom. Wow, that came out all kinds of wrong.
The goodest boy in the whole wide world,
The Superficial Writer
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Dec 9 2008Jennifer Lopez is cleavagey
Jennifer Lopez also attended the premiere of The Curious Case of Benjamin Button last night and reminded the world she has breasts; A fact all too many of us seem to forget these days. Honestly, I blame myself. Somehow I hope you guys can find it in your hearts to forgive me - and not just for the make-up sex.
Dec 2 2008Paris Hilton: Not ready for dating, but who's up for some whoring?
Paris Hilton is in no rush to replace Benji Madden. In fact, she's downright repulsed by the thought of another relationship, according to The Sun:
“I don't have dating on my mind at all. Just the thought of dating someone else grosses me out.
“No way.”
However, what doesn't gross Paris out is pushing the ol' girls up and hitting Bardot nightclub in LA last night. Sure, maybe she had sex with three bartenders, the coat check guy and, let's assume, David Spade, but at least she's not being monogamous again. That's just nasty.
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Nov 20 2008Katie Price's salesmanship has drastically improved
What does it say about me as a person that, if Katie Price was selling cyanide capsules, I'd probably buy an entire case and pop them like candy? Besides that I'm awesome and people are genuinely surprised to learn I don't drive a battleship to work.
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