Sep 15 2009Obama calls Kanye West a 'jackass'
President Obama reportedly called Kanye West a "jackass" yesterday in reference to his drunken crashing of Taylor Swift's VMAs acceptance speech. The comment was tweeted then removed by ABC News Terry Moran, according to Politico:
Although it wasn't long before Moran removed it, with over a million followers, the tweet quickly bounced around Twitter through various users.
Now, an ABC spokesperson explains to POLITICO what happened:
"In the process of reporting on remarks by President Obama that were made during a CNBC interview, ABC News employees prematurely tweeted a portion of those remarks that turned out to be from an off-the-record portion of the interview. This was done before our editorial process had been completed. That was wrong. We apologize to the White House and CNBC and are taking steps to ensure that it will not happen again."
And cue every NASCAR dad's head exploding:
"Man, I hate Obama, but yet I love insulting minorities. My pastor says he's the Antichrist, but again, insulting minorities. Too.. much... nuance... KERBOOM!"
Sep 14 20092009 MTV Video Music Awards: Everyone whose name isn't Kanye or Taylor Swift
Here's everybody else who attended the 2009 MTV Video Music Awards and didn't act like a three year old in the middle of the cereal aisle. Pretty much everybody's here: Lady Gaga, those Twilight kids, Leighton Meester, Lauren Conrad as an Oompa Loompa, that witch from Willow, some chick from The Hills, and Amanda Bynes' horribly aging face.
Enjoy.
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Sep 14 2009Kelly Clarkson to Kanye: 'What happened to you as a child?'
Kelly Clarkson hopped on her blog to tell Kanye West about himself:
Dear Kanye,
What happened to you as a child?? Did you not get hugged enough?? Something must have happened to make you this way and I think we're all just curious as to what would make a grown man go on national television and make a talented artist, let alone teenager, feel like shit. I mean, I've seen you do some pretty shitty things, but you just keep amazing me with your tactless, asshole ways. It's absolutely fascinating how much I don't like you. I like everyone. I even like my asshole ex that cheated on me over you...which is pretty odd since I don't even personally know you. The best part of this evening is that you weren't even up for THIS award and yet you still have a problem with the outcome. Is winning a moon man that much of a life goal?? You can have mine if it will shut you up. Is it that important, really??
I was actually nominated in the same category that Taylor won and I was excited for her...so why can't you be?? I'm not even mad at you for being an asshole...I just pity you because you're a sad human being.
On a side note, Beyonce has always been a class act and proved again tonight that she still is. Go TEXAS!!
Taylor Swift, you outsell him ....that's why he's bitter. You know I love your work! Keep it up girl! KC :)
Because writing full paragraphs is hard, other celebs took to their Twitters to bash Kanye:
"Kanye west is the biggest piece of shit on earth. Quote me." - Pink
"FUCK U KANYE. IT'S LIKE U STEPPED 0N A KITTEN." - Katy Perry
"I'm gonna say this, we should always have respect for each other! End of discussion" - Diddy
"congrats @taylorswift13 on your vma!!! you deserve it more than anyone!! I saw the devil in action when kanye west stole your mic! u rock!!!" - Heidi Montag
Okay, I think Kanye is a giant egotistical cock, but something freaks me out when a rich, Republican white woman starts claiming a black man is possessed by Satan. So, thanks, Heidi, for officially jumping the shark on this one. I'm sure Kanye's check is in the mail, or he'll be over later to pay Spencer. In ass dollars.
Continue Reading "Kelly Clarkson to Kanye: 'What happened to you as a child?'"
Sep 14 2009Kanye West apologizes to Taylor Swift
Since apologies go back in time and give a 19-year-old girl a chance to redo her first VMA acceptance speech, Kanye West made everything all better by saying sorry to Taylor Swift on his blog. In all caps:
I'M SOOOOO SORRY TO TAYLOR SWIFT AND HER FANS AND HER MOM. I SPOKE TO HER MOTHER RIGHT AFTER AND SHE SAID THE SAME THING MY MOTHER WOULD'VE SAID. SHE IS VERY TALENTED! I LIKE THE LYRICS ABOUT BEING A CHEERLEADER AND SHE'S IN THE BLEACHERS! ........................ I'M IN THE WRONG FOR GOING ON STAGE AND TAKING AWAY FROM HER MOMENT!................. BEYONCE'S VIDEO WAS THE BEST OF THIS DECADE!!!! I'M SORRY TO MY FANS IF I LET YOU GUYS DOWN!!!! I'M SORRY TO MY FRIENDS AT MTV. I WILL APOLOGIZE TO TAYLOR 2MRW. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD!!!! EVERYBODY WANNA BOOOOO ME BUT I'M A FAN OF REAL POP CULTURE!!! NO DISRESPECT BUT WE WATCHIN' THE SHOW AT THE CRIB RIGHT NOW CAUSE ... WELL YOU KNOW!!!! I'M STILL HAPPY FOR TAYLOR!!!! BOOOYAAAWWWW!!!! YOU ARE VERY VERY TALENTED!!! I GAVE MY AWARDS TO OUTKAST WHEN THEY DESERVED IT OVER ME... THAT'S WHAT IT IS!!!!!!! I'M NOT CRAZY YALL, I'M JUST REAL. SORRY FOR THAT!!! I REALLY FEEL BAD FOR TAYLOR AND I'M SINCERELY SORRY!!! MUCH RESPECT!!!!!
Pretty much the only thing I took from this apology is that Kanye knows how to Google Taylor Swift lyrics and say they're his favorite. Which is impressive considering I assumed he spent most of his time making out with himself in a mirror.
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Sep 14 2009Katy Perry gets her own post
Here's Katy Perry looking awesome at the VMAs last night and it appears her breasts do not have a topographical map of Peru between them. (Stupid optical illusion, I hate you!) Which is a relief because they're basically the only reason anybody knows who she is. No, really, ask me to name one of Katy's songs and I'll look at you like you asked me the square root of peanut butter.
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Sep 14 2009Beyonce is awesome
In a surprisingly classy move for an MTV production, Beyonce won Video of the Year at the VMAs, and instead of giving a speech, brought Taylor Swift on stage to make up for Kanye West's hissy fit which, according to sources, left her crying backstage. So a sincere hats off to Beyonce. In the meantime, do you think you could remind your husband Jay-Z how cool it was when rappers used to shoot each other? Not that I'm trying to perpetuate stereotypes or suggest murdering the guy, but let's say you sort of grazed him. In the mouth.
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Sep 13 2009Kanye West acts like a little bitch again
Because his vagina gets itchy and tells him to do things, Kanye West interrupted Taylor Swift's acceptance speech for Best Female Video and once again made a complete cockass of himself at the VMAs, according to MTV News:
The rapper stormed the stage just after the first award, for Best Female Video, was presented to Taylor Swift. He cut the teen singer off, grabbing the mic and protesting in support of Beyoncé.
"I'm sorry, but Beyoncé had one of the best videos of all time," he proclaimed as B looked on from the crowd, stunned.
His protest against Swift, however, was not well received. West stood briefly on the stage after his comments as the crowd was silent. Audience members then began to clap in support of Swift after West left the stage.
According to reports from inside the house, once cameras cut away from the action, West flipped off the crowd and returned to his seat. Wale then said to the crowd, "You can't blame a man for speaking his mind." His words were met with boos, and Wale then said, "Kanye, I tried." During the next commercial break, Pink walked by the rapper and appeared to shake her head in disgust before security escorted her away.
Nicely done, MTV. You have security on hand to protect Kanye West from Pink, but nobody to stop his ego from shitting on poor Taylor Swift's evening. But then again, I'd keep a closer eye on Pink, too. Mostly because she can hold her own in a fight while Kanye would probably stand around crying until somebody said he has cool shoes.
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Sep 30 2008Britney Spears basically admits VMAs were staged, confesses her love of pizza
Britney Spears, who swept the VMAs with her video for "Piece of Me," doesn't even think it's a good video. I mean, she made the thing while she thought she was a British nanny which proves those fat cats at MTV "bailed out" Britney. See what I did there? I'm poignant. Star reports:
"It's a cool video, but I think by far I've done videos that are way better, so I was really shocked that it got the award. It was just inspiring, though, because now, going forward with the videos that I'm doing now, I can really go there and do something crazy and see what happens."
She added that she'd be eating New York pizza before she leaves town — and not just one slice. "I eat what I want," the workout fanatic said.
In related news, Britney Spears was severely burnt this afternoon when she attempted to dump the contents of an entire pizza oven in her mouth. First responders believe a Stromboli is the culprit but hesitated to speculate further until a forensics team arrives. In the meantime, Britney's people say she dove out of the ambulance when it passed a Domino's and request anyone who sees the pop star to contact law enforcement. She's wearing a black- and red-striped shirt with a calzone seared into the collar.
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