Jun 25 2008Tim McGraw personally ejects jackass from concert

Alright, first off, I'm not a fan of country music. I'd rather swallow live bees than listen to it, but I am willing to give badass credit where badass credit is due. In this case, Tim McGraw held a concert last night in Washington and saw some large bastard hit a woman. He called for security then took matters into his own Eastwood-esque hands. Tim's rep issued the following statement:

"While Tim was performing at the White River Amphitheater in Auburn, Washington last night, he watched a man rush to the front of the stage. This overly aggressive fan attacked a female fan and Tim witnessed this incident. Tim called for security, but when they could not respond quick enough Tim and several crew members removed the fan from the audience where he was then turned over to the local authorities."

The video is awesome. Tim McGraw basically grabs a hold of this guy, who looks fucking sizable and seems to have no problem wanting to cold cock Tim. Security shows up and Tim hoists the dude up by his belt buckle and literally shoves him across stage. Tim McGraw, you win this week's THE SUPERFICIAL'S TESTICULOS DE AWESOME AWARD. I was going to give it to myself for drinking ten beers in my underwear last night, but there's always next week. The trophy's in the mail, sir. (Note: I should mention it's also invisible, hence the awesome.)

Aug 3 2007Tim McGraw gets his ring stolen

Remember the concert over the weekend where some fan grabbed Tim McGraw's balls and his wife Faith Hill came to his defense? Well at the same concert he apparently lost his ring while shaking hands with some fans. If you look closely, there's a woman in a blue shirt who accidentally pulls his ring off while shaking his hand, and then starts waving it around in the air to get his attention. But Tim doesn't notice because he's too busy accusing another woman of stealing it. But to be fair, he just had his crotch grabbed by some random woman so his head probably wasn't in the right place. It's a wonder he was still shaking anyone's hand, and not kicking them all in the face while running down the stage back to his van to get out of there.

Jul 30 2007Faith Hill doesn't like other women grabbing her husband's balls

Faith Hill was performing in Lafayette, Louisiana over the weekend when a fan grabbed her husband Tim McGraw's crotch. Faith scolded the fan, saying:

"Somebody needs to teach you some class, my friend. You don't go grabbin' somebody else's -- somebody's husband's balls, you understand me? That's very disrespectful."

That's some deeply profound advice right there. Only in Louisiana would you have to tell somebody that grabbing another woman's husband's balls is frowned upon. Hey, isn't Britney Spears from Louisiana? It's no wonder she turned out the classy princess that she is. I'm surprised she doesn't speak with a British accent and say things like, "Mahvelous, dear!"