Dec 12 2008Hugh Jackman to host the Oscars (And an update on Gwyneth Paltrow's breasts)
In regards to that headline:
- Hugh Jackman is hosting the Oscars. In related news, Sony to unveil its new line of straddle-friendly flatscreens. [AP]
- Miley Cyrus gets her mom's old Porsche. Somehow this is the most prevalent news item of the day, and I really wish I was joking. [OK! Magazine]
- John Stamos failed to launch a Full House remake starring Candace Cameron and Jodie Sweetin which proves there is such a thing as "too much star power." [E! Online]
- Gwyneth Paltrow has the breasts of "a 15-year-old girl" thanks to recent augmentation. What a creepy thing to say. - - Pics? [Page Six]
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Nov 14 2007John Stamos ordered the fish not the crazy
The FBI was called to investigate a “verbal altercation” that occurred on a flight between John Stamos and an unidentified woman on Monday. John was asleep during the flight when the woman, also a first class passenger, decided to wake him up. E! Online reports:
The woman then persisted in trying to get the actor's attention after he told her he wanted to sleep. Then, when he got up to use the restroom, she informed him she would wait in his seat until he returned.
After Stamos got back to his seat, the woman persisted in trying to chat with him, refusing flight attendants' urging to go back to her own first-class seat and repeatedly tapping Stamos on the hand.
John Stamos opted not to press charges. Wow, what a nice guy. That’s good though. This lady is in enough trouble as it is. Just wait until her husband finds out that she was on a plane and disturbing a man’s slumber. Cleary she doesn’t pay any attention to the rules he wrote in black marker on that sheet over the bed. See what happens when you don’t stay at home and cook a hot, delicious meal while folding laundry? Yeah, the FBI shows up. Thank God we live in such an awesome country. Now you see why I salute the flag every morning. You know, besides being drunk.
Jun 27 2007John Stamos makes a fool of himself
John Stamos was basically kicked out of Australia after making an ass out of himself for two days straight on their public television. The Australian news reports:
Channel 9 was forced to cut short Stamos's media schedule ... after he went on a second tirade in two days, during an appearance on Kerri-Ann Kennerley's morning show yesterday. The former Full House heart-throb was obviously disorientated as Kennerley's guest as part of a promotional tour Down Under in which he has constantly appeared blurry-eyed, tired and dishevelled. "It was a bit like he'd perhaps come from a hotel mini-bar in true Hollywood style," a diplomatic Kennerley said. He reacted violently to claims he was bleary-eyed, staggering and slurring at an interview with TV writer Stephen Downie. Stamos, 38, went on the attack when Kennerley asked about his tired and emotional condition. After calling on Australia's Greek community to boycott The Daily Telegraph over his treatment, Stamos then turned on KAK herself, insulting the TV star's outfit and gyrating around with one of the studio props ... After his disastrous performance on morning TV, all other interviews were cancelled and Stamos was put on a plane back to the US.
John Stamos' official stance is that he was jet lagged, although sources say he appeared to be healthy the day he arrived when he was spotted at Sydney strip club Pure Platinum. Plus he was drunk. So, you know, the whole jet lag excuse isn't really necessary. Being drunk is enough, man, don't worry about it.
May 18 2007John Stamos has the weirdest belly button ever
John Stamos may or may not be a demon. Judging by his belly button I'm going with may.
May 18 2006The Superficial Ketchup
Sorry for the lack of posts. I wasn't feeling so great and a doctor told me sleeping until 3 PM would be the best solution. And who am I to argue with medicine?
Britney Spears seems awfully glad that a creepy man with a mustache is trying to kidnap her baby. And I'm pretty sure an orange muumuu isn't considered an acceptable outfit by any standards.
Paul McCartney and Heather Mills have split amicably after four years of marriage. Although after he realizes she can take up to $376 million of his fortune you can replace 'amicably' with 'violenty.'
As if Brett Ratner wasn't pervy enough, now he's saying he wants to photograph Lindsay Lohan naked. Maybe tomorrow he can hang out at the YMCA with a van and some candy. And a sticker on the side of his van that says "The Pervertmobile."
John Stamos reveals everything you never wanted to know about his personal life on Howard Stern, including that Denise Richards' kids ruined his game, Heather Locklear invited him up to her hotel room, and Teri Hatcher tried to kiss him to make Ryan Seacrest jealous.
David Spade and Heather Locklear have split up. I wish you could see my face through your monitor because my jaw is on the floor. Shocked am I. Who could've suspected that a relationshp between a gorgeous blonde and a midget elf wouldn't last?
Feb 2 2006Stephanie Tanner is a meth addict
It has recently come to light that Stephanie Tanner Jodie Sweetin was a meth addict. Two years ago she was unemployed and bored and began by experimenting. Soon, she was using meth everyday. At some point a three-day bender ensued, as well as an intervention staged by her Full House castmates -- including Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen, John Stamos and Bob Saget. Sweetin said she checked herself in to the Promises drug rehab facility for six weeks of intense treatment. She's been clean and sober since March of last year and now wants to get back into acting.
"I want to make movies, TV series, wherever the career takes me," she said. "I really hope this isn't the last people hear of me. In fact, I would like to make this a footnote in my career, not the end."
I would've loved to have been at that intervention. That's what tv reunion shows should be like; the meth-addicted daughter, the anorexic twins. The befuddled yet slightly aroused father, trying to talk everyone down and see if anyone will get naked. Really, the only thing missing from Stephanie's wayward story is a dip into low-budget pornography, something like Full House of Lesbians. Seems a shame to waste a custom-built porn name like Sweetin. But there's still plenty of time.
Aug 23 2004The Superficial News
-- Michael Jackson claims he had only two plastic surgeries but now a top doctor is revealing the singer went under the knife so many times that a piece of his ear had to be used to shore up his nose. [Read]
-- Actress Sharon Stone reckons she is an old bag and wont land any more sexy film roles. [Read]
-- "Full House" actor John Stamos has filed for divorce from "X-Men" actress Rebecca Romijn-Stamos. [Read]
-- Madonna is reportedly becoming disillusioned with The Kabbalah Centre, an insider has been reported as saying to the Star newspaper. [Read]
