Sep 1 2009Geri Halliwell's last day in a bikini
Here's Geri Halliwell's final day of vacation in France, and I honestly don't know what I'm going to do without her large British breasts around. Guess I'll just drink all day and look at other women in bikinis. If I have to. *sigh*
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Aug 28 2009Geri Halliwell still wearing bikinis
Here's Geri Halliwell continuing her vacation in St. Tropez yesterday. You know what amazes me: Who would've predicted Ginger Spice would end up being more attractive than Posh Spice at the end of the day? Then again I shouldn't blame Posh for turning into Falcor with tits. You can't fight genetics. Even with breast implants, but good effort.
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Aug 27 2009Geri Halliwell in a bikini
Here's Geri "Ginger Space" Halliwell on vacation in St. Tropez yesterday. I don't even think the Spice Girls are relevant anymore, but notice that's not stopping me from posting these pics. It's like I'm Superman but with photos of breasts instead of the ability to bend steel with my bare hands. Like I know anybody with steel beams just laying around. That's retarded.
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Jun 8 2009Geri Halliwell in a bikini
Geri Halliwell (a.k.a. Ginger Spice) and her boyfriend Henry Beckwith jetted off to Italy for the weekend where it appears she became very concerned about her vagina. What thought could Geri have possibly had forcing her to check down her bathing suit?
"Wait. Did I just spontaneously grow a penis? Better look."
"I should go back to carrying a purse...."
"Victoria? I know you're in there."
"Yes, guv'nor, them coals are piping hot. Too right."
That blonde hair doesn't fool me, woman!
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Mar 24 2009Geri Halliwell & Guy Ritchie?
A newly single Geri Halliwell (a.k.a. Ginger Spice) dolled herself up for the UK premiere of The Boat that Rocked last night then went out on the town at Guy Ritchie's pub The Punchbowl. The two reportedly left within ten minutes of each other, according to The Sun which is awesome in my book. After years of sleeping with Madonna's undead carcass is anyone seriously going to begrudge Guy a shot at Yams McBronzeAlot here? God, it must feel nice to bed a woman who doesn't disappear in the middle of the night to eat the neighbor's children and/or puppies.
Dec 1 2008Ginger Spice goes commando at children's awards
Geri Halliwell/Ginger Spice had a slight wardrobe malfunction yesterday on the red carpet and, hey, these things happens. Except this was at the Children's BAFTA ceremony in London where Geri apparently felt the need to go commando. I guess she likes to feel sexy around a roomful of kids. Interesting...
Note to Self: Invite Ginger Spice to romantic dinner. "Accidentally" go to Chuck E. Cheese. Let sexy stuff happen. (Side note: If sexiness does not occur, congratulations. You're getting pepper sprayed.) End Note.
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Dec 7 2007The Spice Girls keep things 'sisterly' and not 'lesbiany'
The Spice Girls in defiance of all logic and reason have been on a comeback tour. They appeared at the 12th Victoria’s Secret Fashion show and had a concert in L.A. on Wednesday where they spoke to FOX News about their strictly "sisterly" love:
On being back together:
“All of us together again, it is like a marriage,” Geri "Ginger Spice" Halliwell told us. “You just learn to understand each other, celebrate the differences.”
On what goes down behind closed doors:
“We don't fight and we don't share clothes,” Melanie "Scary" Brown said. “And we don’t sleep together.”
On Scary Spice’s attempts to lesbi-fy things:
“She has tried it on us though,” Victoria "Posh Spice" Beckham told Pop Tarts while pointing at Scary with arms entwined around Emma "Baby Spice" Bunton. “I’ve had to say 'no' so many times.”
On Geri Halliwell and I’s mutual obsession:
“I mean, could you imagine waking up to this (points to Scary's body) every day of your life?” Geri laughed. “I just can’t stop staring at your boobs…”
I dream about the Spice Girl’s having lesbian orgies all the time. I mean, who doesn’t? In my fantasy Baby Spice just pulled off Posh Spice’s plastic head which upsets Ginger Spice causing her sick man abs to glow fire red. Ginger decides to Tae Bo Baby in the face then they make up by massaging each other inside a tank filled with pudding. But don’t think I left out Scary and Sporty Spice. Those two are having a kinky pillow fight over who gets to vacuum my apartment. I never really got to find out who wins because some idiot wanted to use the copier room to actually make copies. Then he had the nerve to ask me where my pants were. It’s none of your beeswax, Mr. CEO of the company.
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Nov 2 2007The Spice Girls empower women to stand around
The Spice Girls debuted their new video this afternoon on The Today Show website. And, let me tell you, girl power is back, baby! If you’re a woman out there who doesn’t think you can stand around in a room, or, I dunno, sit in chair, this video is for you. Consider yourself empowered, lady. If these five friends can do it, so can you. Sure one of them has crazy sick abs that resemble my own manly set, but, hey, Ginger Spice just had a baby. And you can relate to that. She’s just trying to show you that, unless you turn that prego tummy into Tyler Durden, there’s really no point in living. Girl power!
