Nov 1 2009Audrina Patridge wants to grant your wishes
A midriff-baring Audrina Patridge hosted "I Dream of Audrina" last night at Dusk in Atlantic City, and has she been working out a lot lately or or am I just now noticing her abs because the Grand Canyon between her breasts is covered up? Usually most of my time looking at her is spent trying to figure out what would happen if Heidi Montag placed her fake breasts in between Audrina's and so far I've narrowed it down to me locking myself in the janitor's closet to, uh, read and something I will only refer to as a "Siliconal Rip in the Space/Tit Continuum."
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Sep 30 2009So Freaking Hot: Best of September
In case you were in a coma for the entire month of September, here's a look back at the Top 10 So Freaking Hot posts for the month. Feel free to catch up on what you missed, or relive the memory of getting fired for pretending the fax machine was Blake Lively's breasts. Wait, I did that. Anyone know when will I stop peeing toner?
NOTE: Pics link to NSFW versions because I care.
Scope Out The Top Ten So Freaking Hot Posts of Sept. After the Jump
Sep 11 2009Jennifer Connelly is nipplely and other news
- Matt Damon and Brad Pitt tell an Italian reporter George Clooney is gay. Nakedness ensues. [PopEater]
- Kate Hudson's lack of breasts has its advantages. [Lainey Gossip]
- Jaleel White has an entourage who feel they're entitled to things besides laughter and a high five from Reginald VelJohnson. [Celebslam]
- John Mayer still thinks it's ironic to dress like it's 1985. [PopSugar]
- Mischa Barton is still blaming her wisdom teeth for a trip to the psych ward. But then again she is crazy. [Celebitchy]
- Audrina Patridge has a stalker. Just in time for her new movie to open. Who could've predicted that besides pretty much everybody? [Wonderwall]
- Penelope Cruz does NOT have a miniature Javier Bardem in her uterus. [ICYDK]
- Jennifer Aniston wants to take time off from acting which is funny because I can't remember the last time I watched a movie with her in it. What was that one where they were always at that coffee shop? [Parade]
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Sep 9 2009Audrina Patridge does Maxim
Audrina Patridge poses for the October issue of Maxim, and I'm kind of disappointed they downplayed the gigantic gap between her trademark wonk-tits. However, I'm even more disappointed that these shots led to me getting in bed with a wedding cake. Especially after that streusel broke my heart the last time. Why didn't you call?!
EDIT: To everyone saying these are better than Heidi's Playboy shoot, DITTO.
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Sep 1 2009Kim Zolciak gets topless for gay marriage and other news
- Kim & Khloe Kardashian are a hawking a new weight loss product they claim to use. So.. when does it start working? [PopEater]
- Victoria Beckham makes no fucking sense. Why can't she just wear a bikini like Ginger? [Lainey Gossip]
- Aubrey O'Day hearts Castro and Hitler, but apparently not her career. [Celebslam]
- Ryan Phillippe is in MacGruber. If Aubrey O'Day and him were having a contest over who's career is ready to be euthanized, it'd be a tie. [PopSugar]
- The Jonas Brothers think it's a compliment to be made fun of by Russell Brand. They do know he's not Jesus, right? The long hair sometimes confuses people. [Socialite Life]
- Audrina Patridge threw the first pitch at last night's Dodger's game which proves God hates baseball. [ICYDK]
Enlarged Version of Kim Zolciak After the Jump
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Aug 31 2009Alessandra Ambrosio redefines MILF and other news
- Demi Moore claims she's never had plastic surgery. Right. And I've never paid a hooker to dress up like Abe Lincoln Catwoman. [PopEater]
- Hayden Panettiere is still alive. Midgety. [Lainey Gossip]
- Hilary Duff is pulling diva shit on the set of Gossip Girl. Someone should let Hilary know who's doing who who a favor in this situation. Then let Leighton Meester know I'm hung like a Sherman tank. Do that first. [Celebslam]
- Robert Pattinson allows Premiere magazine to photograph his brooding. [PopSugar]
- Audrina Patridge is leaving The Hills to pursue her film career which will be going nowhere until someone writes Wonk-Tits: The Movie. [Wonderwall]
- Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minillo are back together which is probably the greatest thing to happen to Nick's penis since Joe Simpson stopped sleeping in their bed. [The Blemish]
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Aug 14 2009Justin Timberlake is a biker now and other news
- Robert Pattinson and Taylor Lautner in the full New Moon trailer. [PopEater[
- Robert Downey Jr. in track pants carrying a man purse. I have no fucking clue. [Lainey Gossip]
- Audrina Patridge and her wonky breasts get denied a chance on Dancing with the Stars by MTV. [Celebslam]
- Nick Lachey probably masturbates with his tears a lot. [The Blemish]
- Rachel McAdams does The Daily Show. [PopSugar]
- Jennifer Aniston will sing in her next movie. Hopefully as a topless ninja or else that movie's gonna bomb. [Just Jared]
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Jun 8 2009Kendra Wilkinson still taking her clothes off
- Kendra Wilkinson shares behind-the-scenes photos from her new reality show. In case there's any confusion, they include large, fake breasts. [Kendra Wilkinson]
- Anne Hathaway must be like porn for dentists. [Lainey Gossip]
- Lindsay Lohan is "on the brink of self-destruction." For real this time. Maybe. [Celebslam]
- Mariah Carey has been stuffing her face. Meanwhile, Nick Cannon cries in a corner. Cold. Alone. Hungry. Still Nick Cannon. [The Blemish]
- Evan Rachel Wood is dating Shane West which has to feel like fucking an angel in a golden meadow after being with Marilyn Manson. [Just Jared]
- Candy Spelling skipped her granddaughter's first birthday party. So, what, did baby Stella kill Aaron Spelling too? Because that kid has shifty eyes. [I'm Not Obsessed]
- Audrina Patridge's brother wanted her to wear a bikini for his birthday. That's messed up. I mean, seriously, has he seen her breasts? [PopSugar]
