Heidi Montag's album sells less than 1,000 copies

FIRST!!!!

FIRST THUNDER-CUNTS!!!!!

SECOND MOTHER-BITCHES!!!!!! Fuck yeah!!!

4° SHE'S DISGUSTING!!!!

I think she's kinda hot - before and after. I'd gladly plug those holes.

She need not speak. She is to be seen, not heard. Ride it sweethart then use lots o tongue!

"The songs will make an impact in pop history."....HA HA HA HA HA HA.

You are so funny, Heidi.

4° SHE'S DISGUSTING

Serves her right.

This is sad

She'll go down in pop history as the person who broke Michael Jackson's plastic surgery record. Das about it.

"Fewer than a thousand copies." "Copies" is a counting noun.

i can't wait until she's 40. gonna look so fucked up by then

Almost $2 million?!? Well at least we know the studio and producers ripped her off real good! Good job! They got paid a lot of money to make a shiity album for her to sell....poorly. Hahaha!!

She looks HOT for a 50 year old women! Yeahhhhh baby!

What?!?!? She's not 50?

Ohhhhh well, maybe she has halted the aging process, so 25 years from now I can re-post that statement! Nahhh, shit is gonna start falling off of her, Michael Jackson style. . .

Madame Tussauds really made a bad job on this one!

She spent her entire life savings recently ON THE ALBUM?! Maybe part of it yes, but I would say that a huge chunk of that money went into her face and body remolding. She also loves to compare herself to Britney Spears, but she will never reach the level of fame Britney has musically. Love her or hate her, Britney is a pop phenomenon who has broken records, with tons of #1 hits- Heidi not so much. Maybe Heidi can match her in terms of her craziness and love affair with the paparazzi, but thats about it.

Makes one appreciate Paris Hilton as a singer :))

She looks like a hot 40 year old. More like a MILF than 23! She looked better before....

Okay, it is creeping the fuck outta me that she now has the exact same expression in every picture. She's going to eat my soul, isn't she?

This is the best case of schadenfreude I've had in a while. She makes Forrest Gump look like a Rhodes Scholar.

hahahaha @ 19's comment I agree why is she so stiff in every shot?

the people that bought this album should have been executed on the spot for the sake of the gene pool...having said that, i would love to lick on her asshole.

Hahahahah, that's what she deserves! Its the closest thing to a reality check a fucked up human being like her could experience.

And on a fun side note, I tried to photoshop those last pictures of her to see if I could make her look less dead, and to my amused surprise, the dodge tool lets you see the scars on her face and under her eyebrows.

What a waste of a life....

Pack up the tour bus! She could sell out a rural VFW hall.

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Wow - just about time for ol' Spencer to turn off the pilot lights, fire up the gas on the oven and seal all the windows. He and the Heidi3.0 bot can snooze off to Valhalla together.

Cool thing is with Heidi3.0, you can just hollow her out and use her as a floor lamp by sticking a light bulb in her mouth (like Uncle Fester). Hmmm...I bet you could do that NOW even while she's "alive".

Okay, I think I have Spencer's Science experiment for this semester at Douche University.

She was blah before, after this last surgery she looks good...maybe the boobs are a little too much, but she is actually pretty now. She is non-descript pretty, but definitely a LOT better looking.
Sorry to say it, if this is her goal then she achieved it...and she was super fug before...

she lost her girlish looks. The original breast implants were ok but she should have stopped there.

It's a miracle ppl actually bought her album! Wait, ppl didn't buy it, she actually connected herself to the computer (cause shes a robot) and downloaded them to her boobs! What a relief to know ppl are not listening to it.

Freak me out, did she always want to be Faith Hill??????? Look at her and tell me she doesn't.

28 - have you been smoking paint chips? A close up of my hairy and soiled anus looks better than Heidi's face.

what a useless waste of space. I hope she has to do porn to pay her bills. Pathetic cunt.

what a useless waste of space. I hope she has to do porn to pay her bills. Pathetic cunt.

I'm tired of the "this is so sad" people. Come on, fucking walk the walk. Months ago we all talk about how she's a waste of life, she proceeded to make it more blatantly obvious by the day, and now you're sorry? Fuck no. I want this joker out on the streets. I want her on the other side of those fucking soup lines she pretended to volunteer for. Waste of life, completely. I'm glad everything is fucking up for her.

Rupert (#11) beat me to it. You numbskull.

her plastic surgery makes her look more like spencers sister.
i bet spencer totally thinks shes hotter now.

Maybe she will be a serious actress now, with that serious face of hers. heheheheheheehheehehheehehe

She looks like a cat now. Why would she do this to herself, she was so pretty before...

She can't move her album or her face. Oh sweet irony, how I love ya!

All she really needs to get some of her money back is a good HD camera for the sex tape. Vivid's going rate seems to be a million for "stolen" sextapes.

you can't polish a turd

Wow, I'm not shocked that she'd do something so stupid, but.....damn she looks way odd now.

I have mixed feelings on her. On the one hand, she is absolutely useless as a celebrity. She has no talent and should not be famous for any reason.

On the other hand, it's very sad for anyone, regardless of their talent or lack of any real reason to be famous, to be so addicted to plastic surgery. It's depressing that she feels so horrible about herself as to make herself look liek that.

Anyway, she's completely delusional. First of all, for anyone to act like a fucking Britney Spears album is of the highest possible quality is insane. Second, this post doesn't mention it but she actually compared her album to Thriller, saying it would have a bigger impact and be more lasting than that. Yeah. Cuz Thriller isn't the top selling album worldwide of all time or anything. She's just sad.

Less than 1,000 copies....
Wow big suprise here folks.

That's one very big fail... I wonder if she's going to end up some kind of porn star...

Ewww she looks REALLY nasty now!! lol She has the same expression in every pic cuz she prob can't move her facial muscles are frozen haha
Actually track # 11 isn't that bad, the rest suck though..And no I didn't buy the album coughtorrentzcoughcough lol

And the sad thing, is that the 658 albums that she did sell, were probably all from her and her family/friends.

Might as well just wrap up the 'singing' career Heidi, and evolve into your new line of work. Porn.

This is what happens to people who are not living in reality

She had 2 millions dollars? I guess appearing on a couple of crappy reality shows is a lot more lucrative than I thought.

For all of you hardworking people that do not have 2 cents to rub together,..... this is karma payback for Hiedi who abused her opportunities and is now getting her sad payback.....

I seriously think this girl has mental issues. I've never witnessed another human w/ her bizarre behaviors and ego. She's narcissistic.

Frozen or not... her face still looks better. The boobs are ridiculous for anyone who isn't Dolly or a Porn Star.

Hopefully she'll finally kill herself and take her douche of a husband down with her

good. i hope she loses all her money. she is a stupid skank who deserves no public attentions.

Maybe we all should download it for free, then delete it before listening to it to save ourselves the pain from laughing at how terrible it is.

Wow, did she actually think she was well-liked??? People will go online and download vids and pics and whatever if it's free, but we're not buying anything if we don't actually give a shit about the person.

I don't know how much of the cut she personally gets, but it seems safe to say she hasn't gotten more than $300 in her pocket for her efforts. Well... that's groceries for a month, so good job.

Great news! I love it when talentless pieces of vacuous crap like this bitch get their comeuppance. The most hilarious comment was the one where she basically tells the world that the quality of a work of art can be gauged by how much money is spent making it. Let's face it: retards who are that stupid deserve to fail. And I'm very happy that this one did!

Too bad her music failed. At least she has her career to fall back on.......wait a minute.......lol

Now Spencer needs to have surgery to get his testicles to drop.

And maybe surgery to grow a friggen penis.

I saw him in Hollywood once and he farted next to me. It smelled like fleet enema and cock.

I don't know what's sadder, the plastic surgery or that she thought she could be anything like Britney. I know Britney has her negative aspects but she also has millions and millions of loving fans that will do anything for her or buy anything she puts out good or bad. I don't know if anyone loves Heidi. Maybe her mom. I am not trying to be humorous this is actually sad that she spent her life savings this way. She could have wisely invested the 2 million and be set for life but instead she pissed it away on trying to be like Britney.

Dats cuz yuz guyz haz da urlz namz alreadize(the superficialz),shez getz scroooowed in the corn hole cuz she cantz readz!

She looks like a man! She basically went from a cute girl to a 'pretty' man... and she has the strangest expression on her face in pictures, like it will crack if she opens her mouth to smile. I am guessing, also, that she bought a LARGE number of those CD's herself... she is so shameless that she probably gave them out as gifts (thinking people would actually WANT them) ;-)

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she doesn't know how to dress with titties yet .... she looks bloated

She's the prettiest tranny I've ever seen.

It's just craaazyy that she choose to go trough such a major change ... Can she even still smile???
What an empty person she must be. She is a weirdo.

She's used to be georgous. Why did she do this???? She's like jacko now. Weeeird.

She looks like one of those 45 year olds on Real Housewives. Or a tranny. WTF?

Fuck...those tits could stop a .45....at close range. Better then kevlar vests!

Too bad they couldn't grow her peanut sized brain...even just a little bit!

undo UNDO!

The most famous she'll ever be is when she dies from a drug overdose or suicide.

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You know, I have to say... I like this post. I mean, it's one of several posts I've read in which wannabe-celebrities embarrass themselves, royally. Thus, this pretty much justice (and I loves me some justice).

Hey, wannabe-celebrities? Keep on trippin' on your dicks, please. Thanks.

Oh thank you, America! Thank you! Maybe this idiot bitch and her faggot husband will FINALLY go away.

Ok… who are the 1000 idiots who actually spent money on this crap?

She looks like a CGI creation. All of the personality is gone from her face.

Hey Heidi was really good and she is not suppose to do this many plastic surgery which make her so plastic . Now she is degrading herself by doin this stuffs and spoil her personality .

She actually looked fine before, though intellectually she just sucks.

She ruined her looks.. deep need for acceptance, damaged goods.

"I feel pretty plastic," she said. "It's still hard for me to chew sometimes and I have to speak very quietly"

Oh ... my ... god. She's PERFECT.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/01/20/heidi-montag-tries-to-mov_n_429456.html

#76: correction. 658 idiots. Apparently, all named 'Spencer'.

i feel sry for her

Awww. I feel so bad for her...

LOL! No I don't. Dumb bitch.... you're delusional if you think you're ever going to be anything more than some assfag's plastic wife.

658 copies?! That's a HELL of a lot more than I expected.
I suppose you could say that's pop history.

definitely looks better but completely lost her youthfulness (of whatever youth she had), looks like a 35 year old with surgeries. but i guess that's good planning for the future? or will her shit start ballistically bio-degrading by the time she is actually 35? this will be an interesting science experiment.

CUNT!!!!

There is no reason -absolutely NONE - why over 600 people should have bought that "album"! Inm even ashamed of the people who downloaded it for FREE. Okay, so maybe not everyone loves stuff like THE BEATLES or LED ZEPPELIN. I understand this. So download Britney Spears or Lady Gaga or somethin'. HEIDI???? HEIDI???? How can you listen to that shit and live with yourself?????

I kinda feel bad for her. Not for not selling any albums, but for looking so weird now.

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First: I can't believe 658 people bought it. What the fuck is wrong with those 658 people?
Second: Spencer's gay right? They are just together for business reasons right?
Third: If no one believes in kharma these two are proof that it exist. These two are the most arrogant, self righteous, attention whores this country has ever spit out and that's saying a lot....so if they now go broke because they were arrogant enough to think she was talented then Kharma I salute you my friend......

I agree with #18, She looks like a Hot mom now, it easily added 10 years to her appearance.

That's about a 1,000 more than I thought it would sell... good job!

That many?

Next stop:

Sex Tape

Porn

Sex with Animals

Dead from drug overdose.

(not necessarily in that order)

I saw her interview on GMA and they were trying to get her to sing. She was all like, "oh, no, you need to buy the album". So the interviewer (sorry, forgot her name) asks her to sing something else. "oh, no, i can't, my jaw hurts, buy the album". It was so obvious that this bitch can't really sing, and it took $2million of sound machines and editing to come up with anything sounding remotely professional. Then they said to her "please tell me you didn't do this to yourself just to promote your album?!?!". Heidiborg says "no,no God just works that way" or some such crap.
Look, I can't stand this bitch, or her douchebag husband, but seriously! it has gotten to the point where it is no longer funny. I won't bother asking what kind of a husband lets his wife do this to herself, because, well... it's Spencer! But where the fuck are her parents?? Has she no real friends at all?? It is just pathetic. Karma's a bitch, that's for sure.

I am weirded out by this whole situation. Why in the world would anyone 25 years old (or however old she is--I'm too lazy to research) need a mini-brow lift? When that poster above said that with a little altering you can see all of her scars I actually felt bad for the girl for the first time ever. I've met strippers and porn stars with higher self esteem. I really see suicide (or a Star 80) in this girl's future soon--and I'm not trying to be funny.

At least the album is aptly titled.
-
Oh, and Heidi? MONEY does not make talent. You could have spent $10-Million on the album but it wouldn't have increased your level of talent - which is pretty much non-existent.
-
I hope Spencer leaves you for going through with all that surgery after he begged you not to. You are SUCH a stupid bitch! Now you look just like every other barbie-doll slut. After you become homeless for having no money and no talent, I guess you'll have no choice but to go back to Playboy - if they'll have you. I wouldn't buy an issue with you in it.
-
You are a sad, sad excuse for a human being. Go rot.

95 you are completely right, where were this girls circle of friends and family when she decided to do this. I honestly believe that she was cute, if not a little bit annoying and stupid, but now, she is so scary to look at. No one will care if there is a personality in there at all, she has now become a freak. I bet Spencer will divorce her shortly when she starts to freak out about her issues and they cannot afford a psychologist and we will find that he encouraged all this change (of course the boobs) to prove he is not gay.
I am so sad, every time I see these photos. Every woman has something they would like to change about themselves but few go to these extremes. God, I could go on forever....
so sad so sad

Now Dr. Drew is calling Heidi a "female crossdresser": http://bit.ly/75t9KJ For once he is on to something.

She forgot the most important ingredient for having a #1 album like Britney or Jessica: manipulating the sales to the outlets.
This puts it on the charts and makes it look like someone actually bought your garbage. Then a few sheep actually do buy it.

All I heard was that one song a few months ago...every effect in the studio burying her voice and it still sounded bland. Call Mutt Lange and offer him 90% royalties, dumbass. You'll still make millions.

OHHHHH MY GOD that made my day. Maybe there is hope for us after all. This vapid attention whore may be doing porn by this time next year. The best part is her idiot retarded trashy jackass of a husband cant do anything to help this train wreck. I despise him more than her, but this is soooooo classic.

Sex tape will soon follow. She's almost at the bottom of that barrel.

Oh, poor Heidi, it's time for porn industry.

Did the bitch use public funds to pay for those tits? No, so why the fuck should I care. Plastic face looks 99% better than you fat fucks.

Forming a 501c3 to raise funds. With enough public awareness, Spencer Pratt and Drew Pinksky might be persuaded to kill themselves.

#102, one can only hope. I'd pay to see her get nailed, so long as it was not Spencer's limp pud.

Hilarious! I hope the idiots that bought her album are ripping it on the internet as well. This stupid whore can't sing to save her life, and I'm glad to hear she dumped her life savings into it; I hope she goes broke. Then the privileged whore will have to work for a living. Enjoy your life, you plastic faced idiot; it gets a lot worse from here...

LoL She is at the All Time Low if she stills thinks that revamping her image and trying to out do Britney Spears????! She needs to be in the back making me some good ole mamma jamma pancakes.

#38 should repeat your comment - so funny!! she's such a freak

Awesome! Now she will have to take her clothes off and show us everything. Then, on to porn!

lolzin @ 64

you made the page a million time wider than normal

maybe this is the opportunity she needs to get her naked in playboy

Where is Spencer? I hope he doesn't leave her. He has not been with her in the interviews or people cover etc.

p:s when he didn't want a baby I think he didn't want to invest in her.

This is the best news today. Do they take back her face if she can't pay the bills?

Although she looks hot now, maybe she will get actually naked in playboy for money.... Even then I wouldn't buy that trash.

This THING is enough PROOF to prove Spencer is a homo. He turned a typical dumb blonde into a Tranny.

Uh-oh. This can only end badly....

Actually they said If i bought one copy they would give me 900 for free.......

Obviously nobody wants to listen to her.

She is so self-obsessed and superficial. I don't
understand why people ever cared about her
in the first place. There are way more important
things going on than to listen / look at her.

Actually they said If i bought one copy they would give me 900 for free.......

Obviously nobody wants to listen to her.

She is so self-obsessed and superficial. I don't
understand why people ever cared about her
in the first place. There are way more important
things going on than to listen / look at her.

@ 14 AHAHAHhahahhaha

Yeah, she looks like a 50 year old who's trying to look young. She must be so unhappy with herself, have such low self esteem. And you KNOW she's going through every website that's talking about her, reading everything. I guess she just wants people to talk, no matter what they say. She's so sad.

Is it wrong that I kind of hope she dies, so that people will
shut-up about her?

Faith Hill was born with the face and talent this loser tried to buy. Glad she's broke just sad that she had $2m to lose. From what? Appearing on a reality show and getting paid go to Vegas. Annual salary of enlistee serving in Iraq: $35,000, maybe. What a world!

Faith Hill was born with the face and talent this loser tried to buy. Glad she's broke just sad that she had $2m to lose. From what? Appearing on a reality show and getting paid go to Vegas. Annual salary of enlistee serving in Iraq: $35,000, maybe. What a world!

Dear PlasticHeidi FrozenFace-
You looked better before. I am scared to look at you now. It's like watching a person slowly petrify

Shit, my high school band sold more albums than that. What a hatchet wound.

Awww, shes sad... wait, is she? I cant tell...

She looks smoking hot and utterly ravishing. Any talk to the contrary is that of the jealous fat cows that populate this site like the losers auditioning for American Idol and the rantings of Fire Island fembots with penises. All you amateur haters WISH to God Almighty you had that outstanding rack, that beautiful face, and that amazingly tight body. God bless ya Heidi: Keep up the great work! If I owned an iPod, you'd be right there on my playlist alongside my Wayne Newton and Harry Connick. As for the rest of you: At ease, and F every last one of you!

#125 bought her album.

She needs to be on a suicide watch. The only way is down now.

Anchor Blue dropped her "over priced hooker wear" fashion line. He music career tanked after spending her entire life savings on an album that only sold 1000 copies. I wonder who bought those copies, everyone else just downloaded it from bit torrent and still wanted their money back.

I wonder what did that 2 million go to exactly?

Then she spent a crap load on plastic surgery, yep she is ready for PORN.

holy shit she looks forty

at least

@ Rupert Since you obviously enjoy the technical: It is "count noun" or "countable noun" not "counting noun."

Great!! This album is sure to be a big hit. I have listened its songs and I really liked it.

Her surgery stunt reminds me of the Daffy Duck cartoon where he explodes to impress a tough audience. Then his ghost says "problem is I can only do it once".

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i think she looks better after this last round of surgeries. i'd def hit it. dont even notice the chin anymore! looks almost like joanna krupa.
less than 1000 sales is a good sign she'll be hooking next. i want some dat, befor its radioactive.

she seriously looks like either a wax sculpture or a robot.... it's fucked up

My friend sitting next to me thought it was Faith Hill at first. Is that the photo she brought to the Frankendoc? "Make me look like her..she like..makes a lot of $$ singing & stuff!". Wait..that may actually have involved coherent thought on her part. Maybe the doc is a Faith Hill fan.

Whoopie.

Before she had everything nipped and tucked she looked exactly like half the vapid, clueless, Hollywood bimbos out there. Now she looks exactly like the other half.

She was a beautiful young girl before. A bit horsey, but she looked her age, and she was a natural blonde and a natural beauty, for christs sake. She had all she needed to rope in nearly any guy. Now she looks like she aged herself at least ten years, is in serious pain, and is an international example of a celebrity trainwreck. Where were her parents and Spencer (the unbelievable douche) in all this? HEidi is obviously still a child and incapable of making life choices. They should have had her arrested to keep her away from the plastic surgery on the face. The breast surgery is stupid as well, and dangerous, but for a plastic surgeon to cut someone like this under 25 should be illegal.

She should make a celeb porn tape. Would be far better to see her naked than have to hear her sing. Would also sell more than a 1000.

I feel kinda sorry for her, her music isn't THAT bad, she just has no followers.
but i can't believe it costs that much to record an album.. wow.

I like some of her songs, as edited as her voice may be, but i think if her songs had some meaning she would definitely convince more people to like her. I don't know if she has, but she should do something slow, heartfelt, even if they still fix her voice... LOL

I feel bad for her but at the same time it was funny watching her interview, seeing her refuse to sing, whether its truly medical or not, i still found it quite funny

I really don't see why people care so much, i personally thought she still looked beautiful, but now that i stare at the pictures.. i agree she has no emotion. I think it's an improvement overall though, but she shouldn't have opted for the cheeks, or brow lift, her eye area looks so different, yet that's all i can recognize her for.

Now lol at my randomly putting in my two cents, but i shall type all i like :p

I tried to think maybe she wasnt supposed to look happy, maybe it was meant to be... deep, but she doesn't even have that in her eyes anymore.

Like i said she did, and still does look good in pictures, but still not so great in person. I think she could have at least tried to model before, make some millions back, but now she's stuffed, they wont hire anyone fake.

i kinda feel like buying her album out of pity now, something i don't want to do but it's seriously in my mind.

And back to the topic of her face, i truly believe that when she 'truly recovers' and gets some life back into her face, people might accept her again.. well not like many did anyway lol, if this was natural people would think she was stunning, it's all bias in my opinion. Although i truly believe she went too far on her body, i was horrified learning she got tissue/muscle/bone shaved from her back of all places, that is scary.

With her quote, some of it is kinda lol, as much as i like her. It really is all him on the music side of it all, like i believe people would like her better, if she had good music videos, and heck if she spent money on those, she wouldnt have afforded this album or her surgery, musta been part of the great plan.

The one thing i will truly back her up on though is her voice, i reckon she might have a decent voice, because again as edited as it may be, you can still hear her voice in it, which is duh, but still, if she ever actually sings she will gain much respect.

But really, she does KNOW that people aren't her biggest fans, so i feel sorry for her getting into all these projects, and having a bad outcome. It's her own fault, but it just .. blah

K bye LOL.. *reads over* i repeat myself alot, fml.

This is not halarious, this is SAD SAD SAD

This woman has absolutely nothing in her life and has lost sight of reality a long time ago. Plus, she looks miserable and depressed; and brainwashed.

Still wouldnt buy her album though.

Poor girl. She needs therapy for being delusional about her singing talents. She needs even more help to address her messed up appearance. What friends (if she has real friends that care) could have let her do this to herself? There's no looking beautiful after plastic get pulled by gravity...and no stopping procedures at that point. The painful truth is that no one truly cares about her. She has this delusional idea that she's relevant, but it's likely she never will never be. I don't think her story will end well.

what the FUCK happened to her face!!! she looks like a different person...

somewhere lauren conrad is laughing her ass off

Someone send her to Liberia or Haiti where the people there will gladly show her exactly how superficial she is.

God she's such a fucking loser.

"The songs will make an impact in pop history" Ahhh bless her.

Although to say that she wanted them to "sound better than Britney Spears" - I think I'd set my goals a bit higher than that honey. LMAO.

Sam

I actually like her and feel bad for her.