Aug 7 2009Heidi Montag's Playboy Cover

Die in a fire already!

I think it's hideous

I hate this empty headed cunt.

Die in a fire, already...

She is absolutely disgusting! But for some sick reason I wanna split her asshole open and let her bleed all over my cock, then come on her face. Yeah, i need a therapist... * grabs lotion *

Playboy has officially jumped the shark

Playboy has officially jumped the shark

i don't think she looks nearly as retarded as she usually does. well played dumbass

If people will quit paying attention to them, they will eventually just go away.

And die in a fire.

Is she covered in poop?

Hmm...

Nobody's beat them to death yet.

ho-k......ewww, i guess....is dirt ever a "good look" on someone?

This is the grossed Playboy cover ever. It honestly makes me want to throw up. NOTHING sexy about this. BARFFFFF.

Looks like they shrunk Heidi's chin on the cover with Photoshop.

This chick looks like Jay Leno with boobs. Her fucking face couldn't be any uglier. I'd masterbate with sandpaper than have that nose and chin poking my choda.

E! is being more classy about this. That's pretty hard to accomplish. Stop posting about them. No one cares. No one.

I'll take Tera and Nautica instead instead of Scatgirl.

Spencer's bullshit could no longer be contained inside his body. He exploded and the bullshit splattered all over Heidi.

My distain for this hypocrit knows no end. She is covered in crap, standing in a bathroom stall. Why doesn't someone just pee on her already?

Fish! I thought we agreed you wouldn't post these fuckers anymore...

1. gross.
2. why hasn't anyone shot them yet?
3. the judge and jury would let the killer(s) go free.
4. what are you waiting for?
5. why didn't that guy who went on a rampage at the LA Fitness just go over to their house instead - start there! NEXT CRAZY PERSON, start with these two. Please. We wouldn't care at all.

I feel rage when I see these morons. Is that normal? I don't even know them but I wish them hell.

hmmm...this revolting , annoying, airhead, worthless bitch all covered in disgusting feces.....

way to go! playboy nailed it.

Hm, photog had the good sense to get pictures of her with her hair covering her face at least.

fucking absolutely HATE these two with every fiber in my body. they need to be dragged over broken glass and left to die IMMEDIATELY.

you show up at a premier whoring yourself with your playboy cover? talk about no fucking self respect or dignity whatsoever.

I would rather see Susan Boyle nekkid.

She looks great, I would buy one! - datingsportsfans.com

I would so enjoy murdering that guy about the head and neck, whoever he is.

1) for banging that chick (whoever she is) whilst obviously a douche
2) for wearing a pink shirt
3) for wearing a cross while promoting playboy
4) for having that face
5) for having that hair

look at that guy's hair - you know he blows guys in bathroom stalls at the airport, just like Larry Craig

Kill them with fire!!!

Is Spencer a fag or what?

Kill them with fire!!!

You know you're pretty much a worthless talent hackjob when you have to promote your shit at another event, namely an opening to a movie like G.I.Joe. I guess Playboy couldn't afford to hand out any barf bags with each issue of Playboy with the cover of Heidi.

Hef should seriously be fucking ashamed of himself to allow this type of FAIL to happen.

@ 1 and the rest of you high school cunts.

Ummm, like totally die in fire you epic fail posters!

Meh. Like I am so totally like a sophomore this year!

Yeah, who is she? I don't even find her attractive. And I heard she looked worse before. She looks like those high school girls who fix their hair and makeup, but at the end, they're still unattractive! You know?

And what sort of Jesus-lovimn' bitch would pose for this? Regardless of whether she was nude or not, she's a hypocrite.

Hopefully this will turn into a Star 80 type situation. Hef steals this broad for girls next door and Spencer kills everyone including himself.

you said you were not going to report about them anymore. You didn't keep your promise.

Whenever I see her, I think that her unfortunate chin is simply the result of a swollen ingrown pimple that has yet to go away. I often get that sort of profile when a few days before my period.

She totally looks like she's trying to suck in her stomach! She's so not attractive & annoying!

She totally looks like she's trying to suck in her stomach! She's so not attractive & annoying!

When did she start doing Scheisse porn?

The energy from Heidi's photospread is awesome. Her star will surely shine now. For myself personally, I will miss taking Spencer's love in my spread eagled behind. Now that Heidi's back home he'll forget I exist. That's the way it goes when you love a superstar.

Randal

When did being infamous become cool?

Okay had to post, these two are f'ing lame. Come on they have no talent and let's face it her PB cover is pointless since she doesn't get nude. If Heidi shows us her fake tits, I'll look and possibly support that decision. If Spencer disappears I support God's, the world's and fate's decision there as well ;)

Why doesn't someone beat the living snot out of this asshole? WHY?

While they may be the stupidest people alive, ugly douche-twins and all but it is interesting that they believe their fame will get them anywhere and they are such "super-stars" yet have to promote a playboy cover at another event.

What happened to her did she get in the middle of spencer having buttsex with another homo.

Looks like Spencer smeared her poo on her after the anal penetration

I can't stand these two and all, but MAN OH MAN what I would do to her.

i really could care less about all this drama , but i have to say i think it is cute how much they love each other .......WE NEED MORE LOVE IN THIS WORLD !!!!! DONT B JEALOUS PEOPLE !!!! I THINK THE PIC IS OK BUT COULD B BETTER ....

i really could care less about all this drama , but i have to say i think it is cute how much they love each other .......WE NEED MORE LOVE IN THIS WORLD !!!!! DONT B JEALOUS PEOPLE !!!! I THINK THE PIC IS OK BUT COULD B BETTER ....

51. Spencer is that you? I hate your fucking guts man.

Um...are you looking at that guy? And you think we're jealous? That guy is easily the biggest douchebag i've ever seen. He transcends douchebaggery. He's like the uberdouche; he's assembled from parts of lesser douches.

He's wearing a pink shirt and he has that hair, and yet he still gets to bang that girl and her amazing legs. He doesn't deserve to live. If I ever see him in person, i will kill him with fire.

So, ol' Heidi is into receiving the "Cleveland Steamer", huh? Excellent. Next up is full David Caradine action for Spencer. Pay Per View on both. Then it wraps in a snuff ending.

YAHTZEE.

Spencer... Gosselin... some serious douchebaggation goin' on today...

Hasn't Spencer Douchebag said he wants to go into politics? As if our government isn't fucked up enough already. If he is trying to perfect his ass licking technique in Hollywood, well, I guess his plan is on track.

#18 and #26, you are both sooo right on.

I see a sequel to Star 80 for these two.

Dirtiest Sanchez. If you look up Douchebag in the Urban Dictionary, do you find a picture of Spencer there? Can someone make it so it does display Spencer? It would help a little....

Ugly is as stupid does.

She has a bangin body. Cover's not bad, but I hate that stupid look she has on her busted face.

Whoa @26.. think about what you're saying man.. you can't regrow your eyes..

Where is the real RANDALL when you need him?

Stop making the rest of us look bad!

Pic #2: Looks like he's never seen tits and tail before. But, since she's apparently not really naked, he still hasn't. Just touching that magazine made him spuzz in his shorts.

My husband gets playboy. I asked him if I could see it to read the Kurt Vonnegut story. He claims it was "stolen". Wah-wah

She's got nice legs; I'll giver her that.

Forget her stomach, they shouldve used the mud to cover her face!

I'd like to see 6 more feet of dirt on her.

i like the bunny drawing in her boy more than the whole coveer ..that means this is a bad playboy coveeer and why? because of the horrible model

i like the bunny drawing in her body more than the whole coveer ..that means this is a bad playboy coveeer and why? because of the horrible model

The should be chased and hunted through the Hollywood hills with torches and sticks. Then terrorized and beaten.

really........ why in the hell is she on the cover? GROSS is all that needs to be said...

That Cover picture is disgusting!!! its uglyyyy...ewww hate em bothh

See here: Another honky tryin to look brown. Get some lip injections bieotch.

Worst spray tan ever.

As someone asked earlier, why is Heidi smeared with crap? WTF Playboy....

It is so weird to see her body covered in dirt... Yet her face is totally clean? Dirt just isn't attractive...

I really want to f*ck her in the ass.

Why des the press give these assbags the time of day? Sure Heidi is pretty hot but she's annoying as fuck and her husband is the biggest douche walking the planet.

2012 the year the world ends.
2009 the year playboy got lame.

is Spencer wearing nail polish?

"Non-nude"

I heard its the damp and swipe issue, if you run out of toilette paper....

Seriously...Heidi Looks HIGH as a kite! WTF did that fleshy beard do to her?! She use to be somewhat "Normal" Ughh...nasty

i think she's gorgeous and she's managed to make more money than all of us ever will. so in all reality, maybe she's stupid.....but do stupid people make over 4 million in less than 4 years?? and everybody made fun of her beach video cause it was low quality....but that was the point. she knows she's not a big superstar...the video was for her small group of fans only. which is why she didn't make a big production out of it and spend a ton of money. what would be the point?

The only thing I'd masturbate to is me slitting these b___ throat then blowing my l0@D in directly in their esophagus. Screw "a day without Megan Fox" how about an eternity without these two train wrecks?

Playboy is almost as much of a joke as Heidi these days.

Paying her to pose in a bikini? Vagina or GTFO.

84. Spencer you are a maggot.

Where's the neck?? O_O

OMG, they're actually both retarded. Nice posed facial expressions.

ITT: butthurt nobodys hate Heidi because they wish they could be/be with her.

I am shocked by the level of hatred this couple evokes in me. I literally want them to die, and I don't feel that way about NE1. I honestly avoid anything that has to do with them. I truly wish they would leave this earth.

Dudes... completely objectively---- after all the airbrushing is said and done... the cover looks pretty hot.

Maybe if we stop talking about them, they'll go away. OK, let's try it. Shhhhh.
.

Pic 2 is the best, great shot of a in the closet gay man seeing his pretend wife naked for the first time- just priceless.

@80. ROUGH Daddy
Nah, Playboy started to be lame in the 90's, now its just struggling to be relavent knowing its end is near when Hefner kicks the old bucket.

they are brilliant artists making a social commentary on good vs. evil

The idea to put mud on her for the cover as - I would guess - a reference to "I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Outta Here", makes it looks like she's covered in shit.

How appropriate.

Rolling in shit and THEN putting on a white bikini = skidmarks all around

Is it just me or does that photo look absolutely ridiculous?! - it's out of proportion, doesn't look realistic. And Heidi??? Playboy's really scraping the bottom of the barrel.

She looks like she's been covered in FECES. Very apropos! So much so, that it went way over that bimbos head. Well done Mr. Hefner!

WHOA! So if I purchase Playboy...I'll get to see pics of Heidi in a bikini...similar to the dozens that are on Superficial right now...except she's covered in crap.

What a value!

I still think they should make their own Jackass show where they swim in diarrhea and dangle over alligator pits. Or, "I'm Not A Celebrity, What Am I Doing Here?".

So this is what Playboy has come to? It went from being THE premiere men's magazine, where young women flocked in droves in hopes of being PRIVILEGED enough to be selected to pose nude. And the place where Hollywood actresses NEEDED to come when their careers were stalled, looking for a boost. Now, Playboy is allowing celebritards to dictate how they appear in the magazine? Wasn't, Kim Krashthatassin "forced" to pose nude, or was that a sham to make it appear that Kim actually had integrity, so when she finally agreed to pose nude, it was because "she had to?" It's a sad day in America, people. Hugh Hefner, it was good while it lasted.

I don't approve the existence of these creatures.

poo + montag = do not want

Don't get me wrong. I'd do Heidi like a mob snitch, no doubt. What I find hilarious is the "Huddle Up For Our Pigskin Preview" title. They are talking about the NFL and not Heidi, right? Hey, you never know.

she is the ULTIMATE horse face. everything about this girl is fake, no wonder she is the most hated person on the planet. her husband is the ultimate loser as well. they better enjoy it, because their 15 minutes of fame is rapidly approaching it's conclusion.

GOD it kills me to see Kurt Vonnegut's name and her name anywhere near each other, it's not like she knows who he is

Will Playboy show her with her legs spread rubbing her love button. No?...Sorry, not interested.

Great. A hardcore Christian, almost naked, covered in sh*t, trying to look sexy.
I'm sure Jesus would approve.

Playboy has been for faggots since 2005.

Speaking of faggots, this is the same as the Jessica Alba issue, but just without the lawsuit.

If you read/look at Playboy, then you're a fucking retard. There's FREE porn online. Tell Heff to fuck off with his senile bullshit.

Hugh Heffner. Did youi expect anyone to be excited by images we've seen on free episodes of "I'm a Celebrity; Get Me Out of Here!!!!"?

If so, then perhaps you should think about euthanasia.

If that's too complex for your flapper's version of porn, perhaps you should just shoot yourself in the face.

She is covered in spencers bean/cabbage shit in her playboy cover magazine.

that is one nasty bitch.

This girl is very average

Oh look, Heidi Montag smeared with sh!t. That isn't really that sexy...

Neiiiiigh.

Why waste so much space on these two bottom feeders? When are those 15 fucking minutes going to be UP already????

I THINK THEY ARE THE CUTEST COUPLE ...A LIL ANNOYING BUT VERY CUTE AND VERY IN LOVE !!!!!!!!!!!! LEAVE THEM ALONE PEOPLE .....GROW UP AND QUIT WISHING THEY WOULD DIE ..THAT IS EVIL .....I HOPE THEY ARE HAPPY AND LAST 4EVER !!!!!!!

I THINK THEY ARE THE CUTEST COUPLE ...A LIL ANNOYING BUT VERY CUTE AND VERY IN LOVE !!!!!!!!!!!! LEAVE THEM ALONE PEOPLE .....GROW UP AND QUIT WISHING THEY WOULD DIE ..THAT IS EVIL .....I HOPE THEY ARE HAPPY AND LAST 4EVER !!!!!!!

I THINK THEY ARE THE CUTEST COUPLE ...A LIL ANNOYING BUT VERY CUTE AND VERY IN LOVE !!!!!!!!!!!! LEAVE THEM ALONE PEOPLE .....GROW UP AND QUIT WISHING THEY WOULD DIE ..THAT IS EVIL .....I HOPE THEY ARE HAPPY AND LAST 4EVER !!!!!!!

She's looks like a fox on that cover photo.

She needs to dump that useless metro sexual boyfriend for a Rodeo Cowboy.

The great question of our time - who is worse, Spencer Pratt or Heidi Montag? What would DaVinci say?

Yes, seriously, Playboy...you could find more female talent at my gym.

DaVinci would be all over that like flies on shit. All over Spencer, I mean.

Filthy vile nasty nasty cuntress !!

If someone said to you, "Jesus wants you to pose naked, it's okay..." would YOU believe them?

Don't let Al see this.... lol
sick of seeing these 2 fools

All i have to say is DIE AND GO TO HELL!!!No One Gives A Shit About You Two!!!!!!!!!

totally on my way to buy it, you all miss the important part,
Kurt Vonnegut unpublished work.

Where's her tan? She's definitely not as toned as she used to be; perhaps, she's put on a few non-muscle pounds since leaving Costa Rica? The Christian Louboutin booties do not help her situation. Maybe it's not the pounds but perhaps a stylist change would make for a fresher appearance.

And she claims to be a Christian? Looks like the devil got a hold of her!!! She's a stupid stupid girl!

And she claims to be a Christian? Looks like the devil got a hold of her!!! She's a stupid stupid girl!

i wouldn't fuck that bitch she looks disgusting i would never want to see her naked i probably go blind

I'd like to fuck them both. Simply because it's raining and I've nothing better to do. Since no one has said it yet, Spencer is a pratt.

Eew Heidi should not be famous !! http://fashionableearth.org/blog/2009/10/19/gag-me/