May 19 2009Robert Pattinson broods for you, ladies
Here's Robert Pattinson at the photocall for New Moon at Cannes, and really, no need to thank me, ladies (and Geekologie Writer). But if you feel so inclined, I enjoy simple gifts such as a home-cooked meal, lap dance or threesome with your sister. Nothing fancy - except for my skills in the sack.* HIYO!
*Keep your expectations low and everyone's a winner.

Reader Comments
1. Chio - May 19, 2009 5:11 PM
FIRRSSTTT
miinoooooooooooooooooooooooooo
2. A - May 19, 2009 5:19 PM
That bitch needs to make his money now because that hair is gonna pull a Jude Law before he is 30.
3. A - May 19, 2009 5:20 PM
He head is going to go commando.
4. A - May 19, 2009 5:22 PM
His head is going to go commando.
5. GuyHolly - May 19, 2009 5:22 PM
Faeg. not him the Fish dude.
6. alfie - May 19, 2009 5:27 PM
he looks stunning..
7. Steph - May 19, 2009 5:27 PM
He is so gorgeous. I don't care that he is blindingly white.
8. Freekity geeek - May 19, 2009 5:28 PM
Eh, I don't see what's supposed to be so hot about RP. He looks like the guy who sat in the back of Chem Lab in high school, rubbing his permanent boner and tagging his Dungeons and Dragons Trapper Keeper. He's no Johnny Depp, that's for sure.... I wish he would go away.
9. Steph - May 19, 2009 5:30 PM
I love that geeky look.
10. Tatulia - May 19, 2009 5:40 PM
nice(L)
11. Oxide Peroxide - May 19, 2009 5:42 PM
Males, take note.
12. missywissy - May 19, 2009 6:07 PM
He's a beauty. However, I hear he has a BO problem, and that's a bit of a turnoff.
Can't wait for New Moon, I think Taylor is Waaaaaaay hotter.
13. caljenna - May 19, 2009 6:29 PM
Is there some clause in his contract that he can't get even a little tan? Sheesh, I'm blind...
14. Otter - May 19, 2009 6:32 PM
John Belushi with a tapeworm...
15. U-R-PlumCrazy! - May 19, 2009 6:32 PM
Dear Lord he is so yummy! Really this man is so flippen perfect! He is at the top of my five!
Okay about the BO....all the hot ones have that rumor.....Brat Pitt, Johnny Depp....Leonardo DeCaprio (when he was hot) You get me point.
Yep, he is so perfect!
16. Lo~Gen - May 19, 2009 6:33 PM
Dear Lord he is so yummy! Really this man is so flippen perfect! He is at the top of my five!
Okay about the BO....all the hot ones have that rumor.....Brat Pitt, Johnny Depp....Leonardo DeCaprio (when he was hot) You get me point.
Yep, he is so perfect!
17. Lo~Gen - May 19, 2009 6:35 PM
Ha, he is so hot I turned into a leprechan "You get me point" Hi-O!
18. Lo~Gen - May 19, 2009 6:39 PM
Okay, I suck! I got a notice that it didn't go through so I changed names and sent it again....
I AM A DORK! I am done commenting. :)
19. A - May 19, 2009 6:45 PM
Is Robert Pattinson bleaching his skin? There is no way someone can be this naturally white with out a little cosmetic help and it does not matter how pale they are in the first place.
20. stizz - May 19, 2009 6:53 PM
Damn. Damnnnnn. I could watch Twilight a hundred times a day - it always gives me the best sex dreams. Ohhhhh Edward.
21. Lily - May 19, 2009 7:01 PM
Oh my gawd. Thank you for making my day. *drools*
22. Amy - May 19, 2009 7:06 PM
Dearest Rob, can I interest you in some sex in exchange for some sex?
23. Cindy - May 19, 2009 7:08 PM
What he's doing in picture number two needs to be on my vagina.
24. Javi - May 19, 2009 7:10 PM
what the hell is a BO??
He is wayyy to hot.
I really don't mind he is a whity white, I'm very white too, hahahaha
Nice pics
25. yeaaaah - May 19, 2009 7:11 PM
Edward is hotter but Robert is the next best thing. haha.
26. yeaaaah - May 19, 2009 7:12 PM
BO= body odor. I have it too when i don't go out. lol
27. sara - May 19, 2009 7:17 PM
*sigh*........
I love the paleness. Super fuckin fine.......I'll take him over ANY other dude in a heartbeat.
Fuck he's gorgeous....
28. Yank and wank they rhyme for a reason - May 19, 2009 7:43 PM
I used to know him, at school, he didn't smell then and I doubt he smells now, he's a lovely boy and it's just a silly rumour that you idiotic Yanks have picked up on.
29. Deuce Bigalow - May 19, 2009 7:55 PM
That is one WHITE boy! I am too, but holy shit that guy is almost see-through. Ladies, I just dont see what you see in him. Hes like a bag of milk
30. Yank and wank they rhyme for a reason - May 19, 2009 7:55 PM
@19 of course he is that white he is English that is the natural shade of pure bred Brits and Irish, if they are darker its cos they tanned or faked it you silly Yank fool.
31. Deuce Bigalow - May 19, 2009 8:00 PM
#30 - Sorry about your luck
32. A - May 19, 2009 8:07 PM
@30 Actually I am British too and pale but he is just plain white and no, not all us Brits are so unnaturally white (except the odd ginger ones here and there).
33. emjay - May 19, 2009 8:21 PM
he is very white but the flash from the camera exaggerates it. I look like that too with camera flash.
Anyway, I agree. He's so gorgeous in an unconventional way. Thats why we are so obsessed with this dude. Mmmm mmmm mmmm
34. Verga - May 19, 2009 8:30 PM
he looks like one of those blokes with chronic halitosis
35. Bren - May 19, 2009 8:38 PM
Wait, what? I'm confused... we're all doing that thing where we're being clever and ironic and cruelly deadpanning about how hot someone is, right? Oh, good. WOW! He doesn't look like he just spun around from a hefty vomit at all. He looks amazing!
36. Beastman AIDS - May 19, 2009 8:57 PM
I thought this site was aimed at the 15-30 male demographic ( a fuckin impressive feat for a gossip site) but christ i'm actually slightly afraid after reading some of the comments from the ladies here - they sound like sex-starved teenage boys!
P.S - I don't see what the big deal is with this guy. He just looks like an average joe to me.
37. hayley - May 19, 2009 9:02 PM
i love this... thank-you <3
38. RichPort's Gay - May 19, 2009 9:46 PM
One word, ladies ( and friends of dorothy ), ... fucking yummy!
39. omg - May 19, 2009 9:57 PM
hot, without even trying....hot DAMN!
40. AtomicCoffee - May 19, 2009 10:14 PM
SHUT UP! Enough already, Ballstein! Who cares about Robert Pattinson anyway? The man has only one look, for Christ's sake! Blue Steel? Ferrari? Le Tigra? They're the same face! Doesn't anybody notice this? I feel like I'm taking crazy pills!
When you gonna drop Magnum on us, buddy?
41. Kathleen - May 19, 2009 10:18 PM
I love Edward!
He's so gorgeous! Thanks Superfish ;)
42. Abby - May 19, 2009 10:37 PM
you wouldn't notice his paleness if i was sitting on his face. just an idea.
43. 7ven - May 19, 2009 10:38 PM
Si, he is gorgeous; just look at that amazing bone structure!! Can't get enough of this guy.
44. 7ven - May 19, 2009 10:38 PM
Si, he is gorgeous; just look at that amazing bone structure!! Can't get enough of this guy.
45. kdollarsign - May 19, 2009 10:40 PM
I don't like the reorganization of the site b/c I don't like having to scroll back UP in a post after reading it to post comments. not intuitive.
46. gerard vandenberg - May 19, 2009 11:57 PM
anyway: FAGGOTS ARE WELCOME TOO WITH THIS BOY, bet?
47. name - May 20, 2009 1:04 AM
i have slope shoulders too, minus the english square head atop.. who wants in?
48. game - May 20, 2009 1:18 AM
gerard go fuck yourself, your comments are not funny and canada sucks.
49. Ladeedaaa - May 20, 2009 3:30 AM
Hot, but yeah, too pale. Agree with #32, not all British are that pale - but you are a pale people. I hope he's got a sun curfew... don't wanna come out the next day looking like a Brit on holiday!
50. Bridget - May 20, 2009 3:37 AM
He's gorgeous. I want to have sex with him.
51. gack - May 20, 2009 4:13 AM
Too bad he's cross eyed...
52. pjamese3 - May 20, 2009 4:42 AM
Hugh Jackman is a good-lookin' guy. This dude is a pale scrawny twig boy. And for God's sake, someone get this guy a comb!
53. Mariah - May 20, 2009 5:16 AM
It actually is in his contract that he can't get any sun...he spoke about it in a recent interview...
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55. SmokingGirl - May 20, 2009 7:53 AM
Even if he has a body oder problem, you'd just "suggest" some shower sex and you'd be good to go.
God damn I'd ride this sex-beast so hard I'd probably die from exhaustion. But what a pleasent way to go, eh?
56. Mr. Jones - May 20, 2009 9:04 AM
#30
Get this, limey, "yank" and "wank" have always meant the same thing. Your snaggle-tooth ancestors used to mock our revolutionaires on the battlefield with the tune "Yankee Doodle". We took it and made it our own, after we kicked you out in TWO wars.
And if you really think we are wankers, what do you call a western country that has "Mohammed" as the number 1 baby name? You don't even own your own country any more.
57. RichPort's Ghost - May 20, 2009 9:07 AM
#28 & 30 - Shouldn't you be in a pub fight right about now, limey? I mean, I know it's only like 2pm out there, but that would have given you at least 5 hours of solid drinking. A light day... I know...
58. ROUGH--likes em natural - May 20, 2009 9:08 AM
Im glad you post pic of this dude fish, i feel like im eaves dropping in a female bathroom at the local bar!
59. SUNSHINE BIT*H - May 20, 2009 10:09 AM
so this man is friggin beautiful. His music and those books made him that way. He was good lookin before then i read all the books and listened to his songs and OMG! i would so fall for him in two seconds if he sang to me....WHAT UP RP!!!
60. Jibbly Biggins - May 20, 2009 12:56 PM
What's wrong with being pale? That guy is frick'in hot...
61. snowwhite - May 20, 2009 1:10 PM
he is so freaking sexy!!!! HE IS SO HOT.
i LOVE his pale skin. its flawless and creamy. he actually wouldn't look as good with a tan.
and, yes, it is possible to naturally be that white. i am a blonde american and i am that fair. and i love it.
62. Meream - May 20, 2009 1:59 PM
Is it stated in his contract that he has to stay pale ALL THE TIME? Don't get me wrong, he looks hot and all. But I'd love to see him tanned sometimes.
63. A - May 20, 2009 6:02 PM
Being blonde (naturally) does not always equal being very pale or having fair skin. That only goes for the people who are very ginger . Some Brits who are this pale are due to them being a closet ginger and have dyed their hair blonde or whatever.
64. jojobob - May 26, 2009 12:30 AM
This guy? Really?