Kim Kardashian + April Fool's = FAIL
Kim Kardashian attempted to play an April Fool's joke when she posted the above pic of herself sporting a tattoo on her blog. Of course, for this joke to work it would require people to actually read her blog and not immediately cry "Photoshop!" at the jarring lack of Oprah arms. That said, it's common knowledge if Kim got a tattoo it'd probably be on her ass and read:
"Please watch my reality television show Keeping Up With the Kardashians Sundays at 10 P.M. Eastern Standard Time on the E! Network cable channel. It features reality episodes with my sisters Kourtney Kardashian and Khloe Kardashian, along with my mom Kris Jenner and step-father Bruce Jenner. Sometimes my brother Robert Kardashian is on it, too. It's a fantastic experience for your television viewing.
Also, scope out my official blog at Kim Kardashian.com using your personal computer and Internet connection to find out my deep personal thoughts on all kinds of topic. Even topics regarding my reality television show Keeping Up With the Kardashians Sundays at 10 P.M. Eastern Standard Time on the E! Network cable channel.
Oh, and yes, I'm the girl in the homemade pornographic film having sexual intercourse with R&B singer Ray J which somehow got leaked and marketed thus boosting my Q status in the public eye."
Then under that would be a full artist rendering of the final battle in Lord of the Rings because, let's be honest, there'd be some space to kill.
Reader Comments
1. KK GO AWAY - April 1, 2009 4:19 PM
THIS GIRL IS SO STUPID. SHE WILL DO ANYTHING FOR ATTENTION.
HER ARM LOOKS RIDICULOUS BECAUSE IT'S NOT PHOTOSHOPPED PROPERLY. IF YOU'RE GONNA DO IT, AT LEAST MAKE IT REALISTIC. HER ARM LOOKS LIKE A 12 YEAR OLD'S IN THIS PICTURE.
2. justifiable - April 1, 2009 4:20 PM
#1 No, dicksmack, a nice miracle would be if you and your fellow dating spammers would die in a nice bus crash or a tidal wave of sulphuric acid.
3. Buttgirdle or wide load? - April 1, 2009 4:21 PM
Her tat says all that but nothing about the buttgirdle controversy.
4. Richard - April 1, 2009 4:21 PM
Worst photoshop job ever.
5. Richard - April 1, 2009 4:22 PM
Worst photoshop job ever.
6. justifiable - April 1, 2009 4:23 PM
Sorry , new #1, the Fish removed that spammer, my post doesn't apply to you.
7. Racer X - April 1, 2009 4:25 PM
That would look better on her booty
8. P - April 1, 2009 4:25 PM
Ha ha ha Fish you fuck that was funny!!!!!!!!!!!!
9. GuyHolly - April 1, 2009 4:31 PM
Space to kill..........hahahahaha................
10. Lacy - April 1, 2009 4:34 PM
Does it really say "Easter" standard time...as opposed to "Eastern"? Get real...what an idiot.
11. Jrz - April 1, 2009 4:34 PM
I didn't realize April Fools' Day was a holiday in Huge Fucking Ass Land.
12. cavy - April 1, 2009 4:41 PM
She's so pretty....too bad the tat isn't real - it would be cool.
13. Boonie - April 1, 2009 4:44 PM
She really needs a tattoo of a stream of urine arcing across her face, into her mouth! Now THAT I'd like to see!
14. Randal - April 1, 2009 4:45 PM
I think it's great that popular celebrities can have fun with their fans and even themselves on days like this. It really helps make a connection that they're people just like the rest of us and know how to have some good fun .
Randal
15. tranny - April 1, 2009 4:46 PM
they should photoshop off her penis
16. Blue Eyes - April 1, 2009 4:47 PM
She does have one big ass....but she also has a pretty face. Not sure how she got to be so damn famous, but whatever.
17. RichPort's Ghost - April 1, 2009 4:51 PM
I wonder what the chances are of Photoshopping a personality on her.
#6 - after reading #1's cap laced tirade, you may as well just leave that fuck you right where you had it...
18. Jrz - April 1, 2009 4:52 PM
That's a stupid fucking "joke" anyhow. I mean, how self indulgent? I'll post a picture of myself looking totally gorgeous with......a......PRETTY tattoo that's really fake on my arm so people will be like OMG Kim got a tattoo!
At least make the tattoo of something funny.....like.....Paris Hilton getting shot or Khloe getting harpooned.
19. shoopy - April 1, 2009 4:53 PM
eww Kim Kardaaaasheen.
20. lol - April 1, 2009 4:55 PM
#17: What are the chances of photoshopping YOUR personality?
:)
21. Hulagurl23 - April 1, 2009 4:56 PM
When will this stupid bitch go away all ready!! for the love of God i beg you fish please stop posting about her and she will go away just like Heidi and Spencer did, positive or negative, she thrives on the constant media attention, it's what keeps her alive!! words cannot even describe how much i loathe this waste of space, i'd rather read a story about Paris Hilton, that's how much i hate her
22. Ted Kennedy's Tumor - April 1, 2009 4:59 PM
Since when did Kim get Lindsay Lohan arms? And #10 Lacy was right. Its "Eastern" Standard Time, not "Easter" Standard. I think all that urine she drank ruined her little brain.
23. Sara - April 1, 2009 5:00 PM
Yea, I was about to say, her arms are fatter than that!
24. antoine bugleboy - April 1, 2009 5:02 PM
final battle in lord of the rings!
she could also use her ass crack to symbolize that part where gandalf fell through an entire mountain to fight that fiery demon thing at the bottom.
they'd only need to draw the wizard as i'm sure there's already some fiery something waiting for him down there...
25. RichPort's Ghost - April 1, 2009 5:03 PM
#20 - The same as 90% of the douchebags here have being laid in the next 30 days... Zero.
26. Richard McBeef - April 1, 2009 5:06 PM
@22 - Did she really drink the urine? I guess I figured he just pissed all over tits and ass although admittedly, i am not familiar with proper pissing protocol. Has anyone actually seen the pissing part of that video? What about the R. kelly pissing video. or Screech's piss video?
I am calling shenanigans.
27. Racer X - April 1, 2009 5:07 PM
#21, Paris Hilton is a skank. At least Kim has a big ass/pretty face. Paris looks like a preying mantis.
28. justifiable - April 1, 2009 5:11 PM
#20 Uh, in case you missed it, Rich has a kickass personality going on 24/7, no enhancement needed.
29. Yikes - April 1, 2009 5:13 PM
She's beautiful, has the best tits on the planet, and is a freak in the sack. Sure, I'd pass up the chance to phuck her.
NOT!!!!!!!!!
30. how sad - April 1, 2009 5:15 PM
It's so obvious this whore fantasizes about being considered the "hottest chick everrrr" and knows she can't because she's a fucking fatass
31. farty mcshitface - April 1, 2009 5:16 PM
this bitch is pure trash. all the money in the world and she can't buy a clue. i bet she's got ANAL WARTS!!!!!!!!! ANAL WARTS!!!!!!!!! ANAL WARTS!!!!!!!!! ANAL WARTS!!!!!!!!! ANAL WARTS!!!!!!!!! ANAL WARTS!!!!!!!!! ANAL WARTS!!!!!!!!! ANAL WARTS!!!!!!!!! ANAL WARTS!!!!!!!!! ANAL WARTS!!!!!!!!!
i wish she and paris would get into a plane and fly into the bermuda triangle never to be seen or heard from again. i will even buy their tickets.
32. ItsFullOfPoop - April 1, 2009 5:17 PM
I'm starting to think you'll be fired if you don't post something about this waste of flesh every day.
I mean,what other reason would you have to keep posting somebody who is overwhelmingly despised by the users of this site?
33. silencio - April 1, 2009 5:28 PM
Super whore!
34. casualencounters.com/blog/ - April 1, 2009 6:01 PM
It's a great shoop and Kim Kardashian is a talented and beautiful actress. or whatever it is she does. Simmer down, kiddles.
35. K.T - April 1, 2009 6:14 PM
She has beautiful eyes and hair and flawless skin, I'll give her that. And she looks amazing in tight strapless dresses....but I could tell STRAIGHTAWAY this wasn't her because the size of her arm!!!! Come ONNNN....as if!! Her arm is twice the size, it looks fake straightaway. She claims to be so proud of her 'curves' etc etc, yet she'll have an arm photoshopped so it looks like Giselle's!! Practice what you preach, Kim.... You are a big girl with chunky arms.... deal with it ALREADY.
36. Tyler - April 1, 2009 6:15 PM
Kim's butt is too big and fat to get butt implants.
I have figured out the mystery that is Kim Kardashians giant ass! I have always suspected that there was something unnatural about it, but I don’t think she has actual butt implants. She has wide hips that usually go along with a big butt, but her butt does not have a natural shape at all.
It appears that Kim Kardashian has had liposuction (or liposculpture) on her lower back, upper thighs and hips. The following picture shows some of Kim's lumpy lipo.
http://famousplastic.com/category/butt-lift/
I think it is a big fat joke that Kim put out an exercise video. All she did was lipo her body.
Since Kim lipo her lower half and lipo prevents weight gain in those areas; she will start gaining even more weight on her fat saggy butt and she will need to eventually lipo her butt. Then she will start getting fat on her knee caps lol! Kim will always have to wear a butt bra to make her fat butt look perky.
37. Jamie's Uterus - April 1, 2009 6:23 PM
Another example of how 'the fish' is on the human urinal's payroll.
38. Taylor - April 1, 2009 7:14 PM
Her nose job is fab!
39. Rough Daddy - April 1, 2009 7:42 PM
Couldve sworn #14 was the guy the apprehended paying a visit to Shaw Johnson at DWTS's...
40. Big G - April 1, 2009 7:43 PM
xd every time there's a kk post you always sound so damn butthurt. she's fine as fuck and could turn gay men straight, that ass is perfect.
41. Darth - April 1, 2009 7:47 PM
Hola!
42. timmy the dying boy - April 1, 2009 7:54 PM
OK, so she gets that tattoo on her ass. What goes on the other 1 3/4 cheeks?
43. mafme - April 1, 2009 7:57 PM
1) Don't flatter yourself.
2) Why is this an april fool's day prank? She says she got a tattoo and if we believe her... what? So what? It's like saying, "I have green underwear on.... APRIL FOOLS! It's blue! tee hee." It's not a joke... it's not anything. Goddamn she's fucking stupid.
44. Q*bert - April 1, 2009 7:57 PM
Q status?
45. vito - April 1, 2009 11:13 PM
Fake bitch. I'll bet she even plucks her eyebrows.
46. Tiffany - April 2, 2009 12:16 AM
hahahahaha wow. this entry had me laughing all the way through. lmaooo
47. gerard Vandenberg - April 2, 2009 12:31 AM
ALL FAILURES ARE FORGIVEN, folks!!
48. Groucho - April 2, 2009 12:57 AM
#26, there is no pissing in the Kardashian video. Unless that is in some ultra-secret special edition of it, I don't know how that rumor got started or why it persists. There is none in the Screech video either, though there was a dirty sanchez.
There is pissing and lots of it in the R Kelly video.
49. FishFan - April 2, 2009 1:24 AM
Thanks, Fish. I needed a good laugh.
50. . - April 2, 2009 2:27 AM
Fish so has a boner for her. Otherwise why all the posts and schoolboy teasing? That or hes being paid. hmmmm
51. Rob - April 2, 2009 3:22 AM
Why would anyone have any interest in a NIGGER LOVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
52. fulllovegirl - April 2, 2009 3:51 AM
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53. Chin McJuggs - April 2, 2009 4:14 AM
The problem KK poses to NORMAL men is like the problem trannies pose to normal men. Let's say a tranny really looks like a woman, a damn good-looking woman. And a guy who is not into sex with men gets the tranny home and discovers the dick and balls.
From the waist up, KK looks damn good. She's got a beautiful face (at least after surgery and tons of make up). But when a NORMAL man sees what's below the waist, i.e., the humongous flabby ass cheeks that when seen in their raw state resemble "cottage cheese in a big trash bag" as Paris Hilton put it, it's like when a guy who isn't into sex with men discovers that he's picked up a tranny.
54. bertie_hoo - April 2, 2009 8:05 AM
ha ha, thats funny Fish, you excelled yourself
55. lol - April 2, 2009 8:49 AM
Maybe if she just admits that she's had so much plastic surgery and lipo, people will stop hating her so much.
she is just so fake, talentless, and is famous for having sex. In other words, just a whore.
56. Taylor - April 2, 2009 10:56 AM
#55
I agree. If Kim tried to be a genuine person and did something to help others instead of being a selfish short fat compulsive liar lipo breast implants nose job butt bra wearing airbrush pictures worthless no talent media whore bitch then perhaps people would not post harsh things about her.
#50 suspect Fish has to be nice to Kim because the E Channel is one of their biggest customers and they probably complained about the butt girdle remarks, etc.....
57. Leo - April 2, 2009 12:25 PM
Notice how there are not as many comments when there are no pictures of Kim's fat dumpy lard butt lol! I only find Kim amusing when she post her airbrushed photos or she walks around in public with one of her many butt size changing shapping butt bras or butt girdles
58. Kim Has Flabby Ass Cheeks! - April 2, 2009 12:28 PM
#53 LOL! LOVE YOUR POST!
KIM HAS FLABBY ASS CHEEKS!
KIM HAS FLABBY ASS CHEEKS!
KIM HAS FLABBY ASS CHEEKS!
KIM HAS FLABBY ASS CHEEKS!
KIM HAS FLABBY ASS CHEEKS!
KIM HAS FLABBY ASS CHEEKS!
KIM HAS FLABBY ASS CHEEKS!
KIM HAS FLABBY ASS CHEEKS!
KIM HAS FLABBY ASS CHEEKS!
KIM HAS FLABBY ASS CHEEKS!
KIM HAS FLABBY ASS CHEEKS!
KIM HAS FLABBY ASS CHEEKS!
KIM HAS FLABBY ASS CHEEKS!
KIM HAS FLABBY ASS CHEEKS!
KIM HAS FLABBY ASS CHEEKS!
KIM HAS FLABBY ASS CHEEKS!
KIM HAS FLABBY ASS CHEEKS!
KIM HAS FLABBY ASS CHEEKS!
59. ada - April 2, 2009 12:41 PM
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60. Smarg - April 2, 2009 1:18 PM
#59, I prefer stinky Armenian chicks who lick negro dick. Any pals like that around??
61. Parker - April 2, 2009 1:31 PM
Her ass is big and beautiful. I would bury my seed deep in her sweet backyard soil.
62. mark - April 2, 2009 1:47 PM
Ass tattoo reads. INSERT MAMOTH DARK COCK IN MY STINKY ARMENIAN NO-NO PLACE!
63. Desmond - April 2, 2009 2:17 PM
#61
I am sure once you get through all the fat fanny flab; you will be in paradise lol!
64. che-che - April 2, 2009 3:39 PM
kim can sit on my face any day. num num numnum num!!! sure i might suffocate but that is the dangers that come with the job.
65. Apes in the White House - April 2, 2009 4:11 PM
Isn't beastiality illegal in this country? She should be in jail for having sex with outdated farm animals.
66. Jamie's Uterus - April 2, 2009 5:15 PM
Yes, fat assed sloppy whore Kim K was pissed on, it was removed from her cinematic achievement:
http://www.tmz.com/2007/02/07/kim-golden-without-shower/
There are many, many reports on this subject. The cow is a piss whore. Get over it.
67. dana - April 2, 2009 7:04 PM
why the shit does she think ANYONE would ever care about her "deep personal thoughts" stupid retarted retard got famos for god knows what
68. RichPort's Ghost - April 3, 2009 12:16 PM
@25 - at least your right hand is getting laid tonight. many times. break out the KY and the Dora DVDs.....
69. Xena - April 5, 2009 11:20 PM
Ugh she's getting so anorexic skinny now. Look at her arms! This is of course after talkin all that shit about "loving her curves."
70. In The Know....... - April 13, 2009 11:12 PM
Kim is entirely FAKE. From the hair, to the boobs, to the ass, to the lips, to the nose. EVERYTHING ABOUT HER IS FAKE! And EVERYTHING about her LOOKS FAKE TOO! About 3 years ago, she sucked AND f*cked The Game and 3 of his boys ALL NIGHT at an afterparty. While the Game was fucking the dripping pu**y from the back, one of his boys was banging Kim's a**hole out and the other had his cock down her throat! They told everyone the next day that they wore her ass out and how loud she was screaming! Game said she has a ton of hair around her a**hole and that she swallows! This b**ch is even into dirty sanchez action (Google the term to see EXACTLY what I am talking about). She gave Nick Cannon AND Nick Lachey herpes too! She also f**ked Tito Jackson while she was dating his son. Hey Reggie! You better wipe the piss off of her before you go to sleep, unless of course, you're into that too. There is NO WAY IN HELL that Reggie Bush is gonna marry this trash!
71. King Diamond - October 23, 2009 1:56 AM
If you really think she is that people maybe you should stop drinking 40s and try something like lite beer. Maybe it will clear your heads. One can only hope. Highly doubtfull!
72. Joe - December 10, 2009 10:18 PM
Good rule of thumb >>> If it has the name "kardashian"...... SHOOT IT!!