Apr 17 2009Gwyneth Paltrow not loved by all? Impossible!

Shit-faced cockmaster.

Hey Gwyneth - my dick is vegan approved.

Gwyneth Paltrow is not remotely attractive, and her acting is not remotely impressive. Her career is completely inexplicable to me. She's not much to look at or watch...I just don't get it.

Was it Apple?

needs inbetweens those legs

It was Nicole Simpson.

Nice sun damage.

I think it was that obese mom who went to get her 11th cupcake of the morning and her infant fell off the couch and cracked his head and then slipped into a coma and died when the mom inexplicably went on the internet to ask medical questions at a celebrity-bashing blog and her chair collapsed under her immense weight and a snapped-off chairleg pierced her rectum and she bled out while beached-whale-flopping...toward the remaining cupcake.

I think that person's name was red meat.

OH. MY. GOD. NUMBER 8
BHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
AHAHAHAH
AHAHA
AHAHAHA
AHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHA
*choke choke choke*
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA

Anyone who actually uses that phrase "frenemy" is automatically a total douche. I hate this bitch more every time I hear from her. Can you imagine the level of asshattey that must occur when she, Madonna and the lead from ColdPlay get together? Thank God Guy Richie got out!

Anyone who actually uses that phrase "frenemy" is automatically a total douche. I hate this bitch more every time I hear from her. Can you imagine the level of asshattey that must occur when she, Madonna and the lead from ColdPlay get together? Thank God Guy Richie got out!

I heard that Winona has a big brown beaver.

what a stupid thing to do i felt like the worst mum ever. that was such a terrible moment seeing my babys tiny helpless body lying there on the ground

Gee....do you think she's referring to Winona Ryder's shoplifting conviction?

Objection! Relevance?!

I want to know who the superficial writer is...<3

Umm... seriously - you disabled comments for that "whatisthenewblack" AD?? I wonder why?

Stop disguising ads as posts - as little legitimacy as you may think you have, it's just pathetic, fish. We know you need the money, but that's just lame and it's misleading to your faithful readers.

@ 14 - it would have been worse if your baby's tiny helpless body was laying on your cupcake though.

I can't stand this heffer. Her idea of affordable is like 200-300 for a pair of shoes. She wants to save the world (or whatever?), she should donate her money to help the needy.

"Frenemy" is so SATC 2007, yo.

i let out a strangled "oh my god" yell as i bolted to him, and picked him up off the floor; his face was all screwed up in a silent howl cos the sound hadn't come yet.
then it started, a full howl cry - giant open mouth, red screwed up face, a continuous siren note of shock.
#19 i was trying to push my breast into his mouth to comfort him but he was crying so hard it was half a minute before he took it and started to calm down.

then while he was sadly sucking, i was feeling him everywhere for injury, checking his face and head, then squeezing all his joints to see if he'd broken anything.
THANK GOD nothing was wrong, not a scratch or bruise. in fact he's hurt himself harder scratching his own face with his nails.

Hottie.

I've got some GOOP for you, Gwyneth.

I certainly hope "Impossible" is being pronounced "Im-poss-see-bluh", Fish....this IS Gwenyth Paltrow we're talking about.

She has amazing legs!

"i was trying to push my breast into his mouth to comfort him but he was crying so hard it was half a minute before he took it and started to calm down."

Funny, that's what my wife told her friends after the first time she denied me sex...

@ 21 but what happened to the 11th cupcake of the morning?

"his face was all screwed up in a silent howl cos the sound hadn't come yet.
giant open mouth, red screwed up face, a continuous siren note of shock."

Sounds like when Guy's wife took his balls and put them in that jar for the first time.

She'd be a great hate-fuck.

#28 - HAHAHAHAHA Jrz...

Hey, uh, "meaghan"... you're awfully descriptive for someone who almost killed their infant.

I thought only old men wore socks with sandals.

ZANNA!!!!!!!!

JRZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!

I hate this cunt more than anyone and not sure why. I get the feeling she thinks her nasty twat doesn't stink. I hate hollywood with all my colon contents. Whoever runs hollywood should just stop breathing. Freaks and dirtbags.

another perfect example of what a boring white bread woman resembles...

another perfect example of what a boring white bread woman resembles...

And how was MN?

Can you imagine going through life with all of her advantages and turning out like that? Oscar winning actress. Meh.

Shes like American royalty and I think we would all be better off without her in the public eye.

Jrz-- that did hurt like a motherfucker; but I got used to it after the 40th time or so.

SOCKS WITH SANDALS????? Doesnt that pretntious stuck-up cunt know only little girls under 8 and old retired men over 60 do that?????

Orthopedic shoes at her age. Oh, I forgot that she is almost 50, well, that could explain it.

I know how to treat these frenemies.Is Amnesty International looking?

uhhh... no comments allowed on your "I have no idea what this is and it's certainly not subversive marketing" post below?

ick.

Poor me! I don't have any frenemies anymore! What happened?

Hands up frenemies! One wrong move and all your genes will be smoked outta this world!

Hola frenemies! Did i hear something?

You felt deep relief and happiness!? Took the high road!? WTF!!??

You must have been feeling something else when you:

1. Tried to run me over with your car
2. Walked past me in a restaurant and farted
3. Didn't flush when you KNEW I needed to really go
4. Put saran wrap on the toilet in my hotel
5. Poured raw eggs into the heating system of my car
6. Kept throwing Nibs at me from behind in the theatre
7. Told Rob Schnider I had a massive "crush" on him
8. Had Larry King show up at my door for a private "one on one" interview
9. Somehow added me to John Mayer's Twitter-thingy
10. I KNOW you paid someone to doctor the surveillence footage!

Here's a twitter for you, ya twat: U R A CUNT

She's wearing a boring gray dress and sandals with socks. Oooh! She's such a rebel! And so fashion forward! I feel sorry that you have to read her blog, Fish. I doubt if anyone else does.

......................MOST AMERICANS JUST LOOVE NOBODIES.
so why not thisone, folks!!

SHE'S AN UGLY BITCH.

I think Coldplay and Chris Martin have brilliant music. His wife, I don't get. I thinik being Madonna's pal means you must be a blood sucking vampire.

Hear ye, hear ye, frenemies!!

#11 I totally agree with you. Frenemy?? Behoove?? WHO uses these words. She is so fucking pretentious it makes me sick.

She looks like the big sister to that twat who's always photographed with Spencer Pratt.

#52, you are an asshole.
Fuck that ugly bitch...and her ugly shoes.

Her face ain't that great and she is a brainless bubble skull, but her body looks pretty hot.

#25 Courtyardpidgeon: You're right. She has great legs and should use them to hold herself up while bending over my kitchen table. Wait a minute. She wouldn't do that because she is GWYNETH PALTROW. Remember that all you peasants.

Yup, those are nice legs. But Cold Play still sucks. And Apple is still a stupid name.

Who is Winona Ryder? Is she an actress?

Her face ain't that great and she's a brainless bubble skull, but her body looks pretty good for having squirted out a couple of kids.

school teacher body, yummy!!

This woman can't dress for shit. She always seems to be trying to show off her dried up punani. Amazing how youthful her "frenemy" Winona Ryder still looks. Now there's a true beauty!

Recently I found a hot club -- S e e k i n g t a l l . c o m -- just for sexy tall gals and guys to find their cupid. Come on, tall singles. Don't miss your love.

My guess is it was J Lo or Sharon Stone, both have said really bitchy things about Gwen in the past.

She must have really nasty feet if she's wearing men's tube socks with strappy sandals.

It is somehow gratifying that people have figured out how self-righteous and stupid she is. They used to think she was this wonderful woman with a great personality.

However, I do think she looks terrific.

Does anybody else get the feeling that her marriage sucks and that she's still secretly obsessed over Brad Pitt? I think that kind of explains everything.

I do think its important that while Gwyneth still looks pretty, Winona looks absolutely beautiful. Even with the shoplifting, Winona kind of wins in the Hollywood lottery.

Clearly Gwyneth is jealous and is trying to make Winona look bad, but it just makes her look petty.

Just look at those legs! Yes, she's annoying, but I'd still do her.

That's the thing. Do you know anyone whos legs look worse than hers?

Her legs are not bad but shes packing a wiener and still a buttaface.

I used to find her completely unappealing, but with every year that passes, damn!
Also, legs!

Oh Gwyneth...I don't hate you or anything but is that how you talk about a friend who took you in after your very public break-up with Brad Pit? That is just so shitty.

Winona Ryder hell bent on ruining you? Please...

Besides, Winona is a far better actress than you are. You winning an Oscar for the role you supposedly stole from Winona doesn't prove anything. Cate Blanchett should have won that year.

You wanna know something else, I like Blythe Danner better than you.

P.S. I wish you or Winona would post on YouTube the SPICE GIRLS videos I read you made.

Paltrow's best feature is her legs and they look pretty bony in those pics. Her face looks a tad better with the help of a self-tanner. Catch her in her candids and you'll see close-ups are not her friend.
Her frenemy Ryder has aged well and still looks beautiful.
It would serve the goopy bitch well to find out Ryder's beauty secrets. Apparently Noni's doing something right.