Jan 11 2009Kanye West wants to pose naked. Okay, sure.
Superstar rapper Kanye West wants to redefine the world of hip-hop as we know it. Except his plan involves showing you his testicles, and I'm literally not joking. Here's what DJ Nudestein told the latest issue of Vibe:
"I definitely feel like, in the next however many years, if I work out for two months, that I'll pose naked. I break every rule and mentality of hip-hop, of black culture, of American culture."
Another obstacle in Kanye's quest to flash his dong is the always irksome problem of having too many people love your music. That's right. Kanye has too many fans, and he's not ashamed to bitch about it:
"I want the freedom of having less fans. It's like the freedom of having less money. If you have less money, you have less responsibility. It's like Björk. If she wanted to pose naked, you'd be like: 'Oh, that's Björk. But if I wanted to pose naked, people would draw all type of things into it."
Let me get this straight; Kanye West is begging people to not buy his albums, so he can become an exhibitionist. Excuse me for a minute:
Kanye,
For the record, I have never purchased a single note of your music. Please, do not consider this an endorsement of your new-found desire to display your jungle of love. It's actually the exact opposite. In fact, if you agree to put more clothes on top of the clothes you're already wearing, I'll walk into Target right now and start punching anyone in the face that tries to buy your CDs. You'll get less fans. I won't have to see your cock, and everyone's a winner.
Holla' at your boy,
The Superficial Writer
P.S. Did you seriously just compare yourself to a petite female Icelandic singer? Wow. That's messed up.
Reader Comments
1. ~*Adrienne*~ - January 11, 2009 6:04 PM
Nigger!
2. ~*Adrienne*~ - January 11, 2009 6:04 PM
Nigger!
3. ~*Adrienne*~ - January 11, 2009 6:04 PM
Nigger!
4. amanda - January 11, 2009 6:05 PM
i have no urge whatsoever to see him naked or buy his music...
5. me - January 11, 2009 6:15 PM
Anyone posting after me sucks on Kanye West's long black dong
6. Carlos - January 11, 2009 6:18 PM
Kanye, you can go ahead and admit what the rest of the world already assumes about you. Your peculiar comments and odd behavior aren't gonna keep that closet locked any tighter, fella.
7. Sally - January 11, 2009 6:31 PM
To me or @ 5
How do you know it is long unless you sucked it long and hard
You fag.
8. Ariella - January 11, 2009 6:32 PM
what exactly does he want to pose naked for?
does want to do it for a magazine shoot, album cover, paparazzi style, playgirl, music video, porn, painting, or does he just want to hire a photographer to photograph him naked and release the photos to the press?
i really don't wanna see it regardless, he's gross and oh so humble.
9. Guest - January 11, 2009 6:32 PM
No offense; but black guys naked are NOT sexy
Kanye is a super hot man, and I love him
(I LOVE him)
But he wouldn't be sexy naked. Because black
guys dicks look weird.
That's my opinion, don't tell me i'm racist
blah blah blah
You know it's true.
10. 12=32 - January 11, 2009 6:41 PM
Let me know when...!! shiiiii...He's hot...
And it's so sad to see people make such racists comments. I hope the website takes them down.
11. devilsrain - January 11, 2009 6:47 PM
Its got to piss you off when you have to shop in the childrens dept to get a tux. Plus the tie is as big as his head. Youd think with his money he could afford clothing that fits.
12. 10pound - January 11, 2009 6:59 PM
knee grow home
13. Guest - January 11, 2009 7:01 PM
My comment, #9,
is not racist.
If I said I don't like white people
naked because it looks weird - is that racist?
No, it's an opinion. Black people naked,
to me is soooo un-sexy. Some people
probably think that about white
people do - I don't care because it's
an opinion.
OMFG #10
14. Ariella - January 11, 2009 7:03 PM
i have no problem with black guys naked
kanye west is just not attractive.
if it were lil wayne on the other hand...
15. Erica - January 11, 2009 7:06 PM
I don't want to see him naked nor do I want to listen to his shitty music. It is overplayed and not even good.
16. It's Me Fuckers - January 11, 2009 7:07 PM
too bad people didn't like him as much as HE THINKS people like him. He is a whiny diva. Just like Axel Rose. Whiny male divas. If people liked him as much as he likes himself, then maybe he would actually win some awards. I have no respect for male whiny divas. Stupid cunts are surrounded by too many "yes" people to be able to see what happens in the real world.
17. Paris Hilton - January 11, 2009 7:08 PM
Nobody wants to see that junk......
18. Heather - January 11, 2009 7:08 PM
#14. Lil' Wayne looks like a monkey. He has a nice body, but his face is gross.
19. AXL - January 11, 2009 7:11 PM
Kanye has a really weird shaped head...I mean the one on his shoulders btw.
20. twzzlrgirl - January 11, 2009 7:16 PM
Oh, please. This man is so in love with himself it's disgusting.
However, the Superfish writer is funny and awesome and I'm sure incredibly sexy. Muah!!! Great post ;)
21. fhhhs - January 11, 2009 7:41 PM
Just more stupid TNB drama from Kanye . . .
22. loved` - January 11, 2009 7:53 PM
true, ture @ # 14.... i love lil wayne!
23. therightrub - January 11, 2009 8:08 PM
one time in a serious interview, i asked bjork if she thought she was better than kanye west. she cried for two and a half hours!!!!!!
kanye ftw!
24. bootlips - January 11, 2009 8:23 PM
The funny thing about the simian people is they plead for help like lost little children and then act like they're royalty when given what they needed.
25. Kitahara Nanase - January 11, 2009 8:39 PM
Even though I like his music, I'm still not hip to the idea of seeing him ass naked.
No sirree. >_<
26. Ariella - January 11, 2009 8:40 PM
@18
i think his face works for him personally
but if he were naked that could be a good distraction for those who only appreciate his body
27. nicoe - January 11, 2009 8:53 PM
this guy is is on par with paris hilton in regards to dumb shit that comes out of his mouth and/or believing he is relevant. his music is no talent worse than robbie williams bullshit!
i got the cd as a gift. listened to :05 seconds and tossed it out the car window on I-95...thing that sucks is i will never get to :05 seconds back....
28. Air Mail - January 11, 2009 9:02 PM
Well, we already know he's short on talent...
29. grobpilot - January 11, 2009 9:12 PM
He really wants to show us his dried-up, dusty old cunt? Fuck off.
30. lola richie - January 11, 2009 9:45 PM
He is very cute and takes care of himself. He could never be attractive due to his diva ways. His attitude is such a turn off and he looks like an asshole.
31. Andrew - January 11, 2009 10:10 PM
What a fuckin' poser. Sure he's Kanye West, but he's become a cliche....the douche rapper who has talent but thinks he's bigger than God.....what a fuck. He's got talent...but so do a million other people on Earth with out the money to make themselves known. Goddamn you're the epitome of sellout...make good music, then be satisfied...don't act like you're the shit when you're really just a fuckin' mile marker in the long run. Be happy with happiness.
peace
32. meee - January 11, 2009 10:12 PM
i hate kanye west & his fat little chubby cheek problem. he double rhymes so damn often i want to punch him for thinking he's so fucking awesome.
33. ohkanye - January 11, 2009 10:20 PM
Um, Bjork's sold over 15 million albums, and has toured her ass off for years. Something tell me she has money and fans. She gets away with doing crazy shit because she's that eccentric chick from Iceland, not from a lesser pocketbook.
34. Truth Doctor - January 11, 2009 10:23 PM
"I break every rule and mentality of hip-hop, of black culture, of American culture"
Kanye, seriously, saying that you do this DOES NOT mean that you actually do. I would tell you that you talk a good game, but you don't even really do that.
Give 100 random people the choice between your best CD and anything by Miley Cyrus and you'd be LUCKY to sell 15 albums. Yes, lucky. Hm, what do you think that means? Care to take a guess?
Hey, I'm not saying anything you don't already know.
35. Stiles - January 11, 2009 10:54 PM
He just wants to show off the "LV" he had lasered into his pubes.
36. Jonathan - January 11, 2009 11:07 PM
OK, I'll admit the guy has put out some decent songs, but I still wouldn't mind seeing some knock this douchebag out.
37. Petra - January 11, 2009 11:15 PM
@5
I bet you're like 13 or something. . .
@ 9 / 13
I agree completely
ANYWAY,
I like *some* of his songs and he's only being obnoxious
because thats part of his 'image'. Come on people.
Even though he's really really cute and got nice clothes
and nice lips,
It was kind of dumb of him to say, but he has no
hardcore fans anyway.
38. Mr. Knievel - January 11, 2009 11:45 PM
Why don't he and Diddy just come out of the closet together so we can be done with all their confused gay fugazi machismo. They're like the Black Cruise and Travolta.
39. shirleytemple - January 12, 2009 12:09 AM
PUAHAHAHAHA
oh superfish... you killed with that love letter. if there were more hours in a day i would spend them wisely punching kanye fans as well. i hate that cocky fucker
40. j - January 12, 2009 12:13 AM
his lyrics are equivalent to madonna's. he gets attention for wearing sunglasses and liking electro (also like madonna). i hate him cause he's a hipster all the other stupid hipsters look up to. i guess this fool will pay when 5 years from now, he'll realize for the first time, no one cares about his butt naked ass.
41. Kenya - January 12, 2009 12:17 AM
Fish, you've got your groove on tonight. Your post was hilarious and on the mark. Kanye West needs a serious reality check. I don't particularly like his music, I am sick of hearing his arrogant and egotistical comments, and I REALLY don't want to see him naked.
42. Delgo - January 12, 2009 2:11 AM
Kanye was be dope on SNL.
Y'all is just haters hating hate on Kanye.
George Bush hates black people.
43. Starcasm - January 12, 2009 2:47 AM
Good ol' Kanye! Doing our job for us! All we have to do is quote what he says and then draw a funny cartoon about it:
http://starcasm.net/archives/2976
44. Brandon - January 12, 2009 3:32 AM
Kanye is one of the biggest pieces of shit on the face of the planet, and his new album is fucking horrible.
45. Commanda - January 12, 2009 4:05 AM
Nobody wants to see that. I'm having nightmares already. EWWW. His perofrmance on SNL was horrific at best. What a joke. LOL
46. gorgehu1 - January 12, 2009 7:46 AM
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47. gorgehu1 - January 12, 2009 7:46 AM
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48. gorgehu1 - January 12, 2009 7:48 AM
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49. Three Bay B Chicks - January 12, 2009 8:22 AM
Hey there Superficial Writer:
I am de-lurking this morning and commenting on this post. Your diatribe and letter to Kayne was laugh out loud funny. I log onto your site several times a day, usually just to get my celeb fix, but today I was happy to find oh-so-much more. Thank you!
PS: Are your comments always this scary? If they are, I might be a bit afraid to come back to your comment board. Where have all of the shining, happy people gone? Don't they care about celebrity trash?
50. Kaybadass - January 12, 2009 9:00 AM
Kanye is an ass wad. Who the hell does he think he is? First, he's comparing himself to Elvis and now he thinks he has too many fans?? Give me a fucking break. Kanye... You suck and so does your music. I never have and never will buy one of your records. Your music isnt even good enough to pirate online! Fall of the face of the earth... PLEASE.
51. Kaybadass - January 12, 2009 9:01 AM
Kanye is an ass wad. Who the hell does he think he is? First, he's comparing himself to Elvis and now he thinks he has too many fans?? Give me a fucking break. Kanye... You suck and so does your music. I never have and never will buy one of your records. Your music isnt even good enough to pirate online! Fall of the face of the earth... PLEASE.
52. RichPort's Ghost - January 12, 2009 9:18 AM
His first film role should be the token Black dude in a horror movie. You know what happens next...
53. Uncle Eccoli - January 12, 2009 9:43 AM
Won't somebody do the world a favour and take care of this ass?
54. Angry Beaver - January 12, 2009 9:44 AM
He'll never pose...he's just confused. When people call him a big dick, they're referring to him as a person, not the tiny dark twizzler between his legs his boyfriend talks about.
55. mamamiasweetpeaches - January 12, 2009 10:24 AM
Wow. I'd pay NOT to see it. This reminds me of a few weeks ago when I saw P DIDDY threatening to show up naked at some upcoming awards show. I think I lost 5 pounds that week.
And its not like Im against seeing black guys naked. Why doesn't L L COOL J show us the money? Or LENNY KRAVITZ? There's something I'd stand in line to see! And maybe even Samuel L Jackson. I've never seen him IN anything bad so I imagine "IN the raw" would be no exception!
oh, and I have a few BJORK CDs in my house and have never even HEARD a KANYE song...so , yeah, whatever. To compare himself to BJORK in any way, shape or form is just wishful thinking on HIS part!
56. mamamiasweetpeaches - January 12, 2009 10:25 AM
Wow. I'd pay NOT to see it. This reminds me of a few weeks ago when I saw P DIDDY threatening to show up naked at some upcoming awards show. I think I lost 5 pounds that week.
And its not like Im against seeing black guys naked. Why doesn't L L COOL J show us the money? Or LENNY KRAVITZ? There's something I'd stand in line to see! And maybe even Samuel L Jackson. I've never seen him IN anything bad so I imagine "IN the raw" would be no exception!
oh, and I have a few BJORK CDs in my house and have never even HEARD a KANYE song...so , yeah, whatever. To compare himself to BJORK in any way, shape or form is just wishful thinking on HIS part!
57. James - January 12, 2009 11:04 AM
god i'm so sick of kanye. For starters he can't rap for shit. Yeah he can put together a good beat, but he raps like a kid with downsyndrome.
Second he hasn't broken any rule of any culture. He definitely wouldn't be the first naked black guy in the world. 2 Live Crew used to flash their shit more than a drunk heiress so he isn't doing anything new for the hip-hop world.
Hell he's never done anything that wasn't done ten years ago by someone with real talent. Even his ego trips are a sad fucking imitation of Diddy's diva fits.
and he's just a fucking idiot. In a country in the middle of a recession with people losing their homes and jobs at break-neck speed he's actually going to sit there and say less money gives people more freedom? i mean... god damn that is stupid. I'm starting to bet he didn't drop out of college at all but failed.
58. please - January 12, 2009 11:22 AM
First of all, I am really disgusted at some of the racist comments on here. Go crawl back into a box.
HOWEVER, Kanye is just not that talented. How does he break rules? By over-using a vox-box on his newest album? By whining? There's is nothing unique or ground breaking about his music or style.
Secondly, does he even know who Bjork is? Bjork's career is at least five times longer than Kanye, she has millions and millions of devoted fans all over the world, and Bjork is a true artist. She can pose naked because she does what she wants and her fan base is so loyal, they will follow her. Plus, nudity has been a part of her career nearly from the beginning.
Get over yourself, Kanye.
59. Grammar Nazi - January 12, 2009 11:41 AM
"I want the freedom of having FEWER fans"
Sheez...
60. pedantic fucker - January 12, 2009 11:59 AM
you don't say "less fans", you say "fewer fans"
dumb cotton-picker thinks he's some kind of demi-god but he can't even speak english properly
61. RichPort's Ghost - January 12, 2009 12:42 PM
#59 - #60 - So is it "Who gives a fuck about you pretending to be smart you cocksucker!!!" or "Who gives a fuck about you pretending to be smart you cocksucker???" I mean, less, fewer, really... who gives a fuck you pretending to be smart you cocksucker?!?!?!?
62. Andrew - January 12, 2009 1:21 PM
well, what else d'u expect from a nigga like him or any other of that sub-species for that matter...
being an american nigga's got to be the worst combination ever.
Humanity at its lowest.
63. chantel - January 12, 2009 1:28 PM
We will soon all be like the jetsons!!!! FIRST FLYING CAR!!!
http://www.zacktaylor.ca/photos/uncategorized/2009/01/11/carfly.jpg
64. mamamiasweepeaches - January 12, 2009 1:33 PM
Dont you love these celebrities who say they want less, fame, less money, less fans? I say GIVE 'EM WHAT THEY WANT! Everybody STOP buying this guys albums! Dont send a red cent his way!
AND just thought of another brother who I would prefer to see nude than this guy who looks like Gary Coleman's older brother - USHER! Ooooh yeahhh! Giggity!
65. Julie Ann - January 12, 2009 2:35 PM
Hope his dick is as big as his ego.
66. missywissy - January 12, 2009 2:36 PM
Am I the only person in here that would actually look at a photo of Kanye West naked if one existed??????
I say go for it!!!! I think it's awesome. I fucking hate him, but I don't mind seeing a dude that takes care of himself naked.
He'll probablly hire some expensive photographer to take his photo so it looks "artistic" and photoshop a few inches and what not.
That's funny he said he would have to have a few months notice so he could get into shape. I didn't know seasoned celebs admit to shit like that.
67. Sport - January 12, 2009 3:07 PM
What a fucking loser, equating doing something revolutionary or cutting edge by showing his crank. Yay.
68. Goon - January 12, 2009 4:38 PM
He has such nigger hair.
69. riiight - January 12, 2009 5:33 PM
I agree with #58. I think Kanye is so wrapped up in being "the voice of a generation of a decade" or some shit like that, that he forgot Bjork as been nominated for 13 Grammy Awards, an Academy Award and two Golden Globe Awards. Not to mention being hailed on many "greatest artists" lists. She just gets away with that crazy shit because that's her persona.
70. grammarishot - January 12, 2009 5:35 PM
#59... lol!
71. Rachiz - January 12, 2009 5:36 PM
Dear Kanye West,
you seriously need to shut the fuck up. You and your diva antics aren't impressing anyone and in 2 years no one will know you name, and guess what they'll still mispronounce it, bitch. Don't take your clothes off because then you'll expose to the world the spoiled 8 year old little girl you hide under a 30 something black man. Bitch please. Stop talking about yourself like you're the black messiah. Your music sucks. That one James Bond Diamonds are Forever one was pretty cool but i'm just being generous. I hope you read this and BITCH ABOUT IT ON YOUR BLOG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11!!!!!!!!!!!1!!
don't worry about having too many fans, i'm pretty sure you killed it at bonaroo.
p.s you're not P. Diddy
p.p.s or Jay-Z
72. amber - January 12, 2009 5:59 PM
Fuck you K west.
Your 'music' isn't even worth the bandwidth for a free download.
73. kanye is a shitstain - January 12, 2009 6:09 PM
Kanye is a punk ass fairy and a douchebag.
He's also a lapdog to some in the music industry.
74. Ardgelina - January 12, 2009 7:44 PM
I agree #66
I'm curious to see what he looks like nude! He is so full of himself.... he is prob really proud of something! I say let us see. I don't like his attitude tho big turn off but the man can dress his ass off!!!! I love his style. I love his new cd 2! All he needs 2 do is lose the attitude and he would be a perfect man!
75. M. - January 12, 2009 8:56 PM
He' s so full of himself that it's almost unbelievable.
I don't particularly enjoy his flow, but he's a good rapper and a talented producer BUT jeez he's such a douchebag that all the other douchebags are starting to get jealous.
He needs to boost down his ego before he explodes.
76. Jeffrey - January 12, 2009 9:12 PM
I'm black and I'm REALLY tired of this supposed "black culture" thing in hip hop.
it used to be decent when people REALLY came from the streets or when the lyrics used go be good (ATCQ, Guru, Nas, Afu-Ra and many many other artists).
Now it all comes down to bling bling, hoes and guns.
What the heck is going on?!
Is being an illiterate and ignorant afro-american good? Since when?
All this crap is destroying the black culture, that's all it's doing.
I'm so ashamed and tired of these people bringing us down as people.
77. robert byrd - January 12, 2009 10:48 PM
You can get a preview by going to the gorilla exhibit at your local zoo
78. D - January 13, 2009 2:29 AM
Keep making records like your latest and you will have less fans. Actually you already do, but I mean even less.
79. julie - January 13, 2009 8:08 AM
umm did Kanye not know that Björk already posed naked? Also he´s sort of using a terrible comparison. Female nudity is always more socially acceptable than male nudity. And to everyone saying "Björk can get away with posing naked cos she crazy!" She is just as "crazy" as any other Icelandic chick I know. It's not just her, they are all like that!
Lastly, Kanye is a unjustified egomaniac. he only redeeming quality is the fact he likes Harold's Chicken Shack, but anyone who has eaten there knows it's the best.
http://imagecache2.allposters.com/images/pic/PF/PF_816849_999~Bjork-Naked-with-Leaves-Posters.jpg
80. nea - January 13, 2009 11:56 AM
UGH!! He pisses me off everytime I look at him with his disgusting gopher cheeks and arrogant attitude. I hope his "fans" stop buying AND downloading his shit! He's a self proclaimed god of music and style..he's F#$@ing sick!
81. calling all haters - January 13, 2009 6:54 PM
I guess this is where HATERS live (online).
82. susie - January 15, 2009 11:00 PM
bjork naked - kinda rhymes...
83. Amanda - January 20, 2009 10:00 AM
He is a moron. He bitches about EVERYTHING. I hate that he acts like a poor black man when he grew up in the nice SUBURBS!!! He's got a nasty body, 50 cent I'd look at, but not kanye, YUCK!
84. G. - January 23, 2009 6:52 PM
I wouldnt mind seeing what kanye is packing in them jeans, Cmon I know half you suckas would buy the got damn magazine too you all HATERS.. BUT I WOULD RATHER SEE T.I. ShOW OFF HIS INSTEAD OR CHINGY...
85. Peaches - January 23, 2009 6:55 PM
Oooh I hope he does show it off! have you seen that video STRONGER" you can totally see that he is packing a monsta!! You all just hatas!!!
SHOW IT !!!
SHOW IT!!!
86. Soma pill head - January 23, 2009 6:59 PM
I bet he has like an 11 Incher!!! for sure at least 10 1/2 inch it is hude I can see he bulge!!
87. Soma pill head - January 23, 2009 6:59 PM
I bet he has like an 11 Incher!!! for sure at least 10 1/2 inch it is huge I can see he bulge!!
88. Soma pill head - January 23, 2009 6:59 PM
I bet he has like an 11 Incher!!! for sure at least 10 1/2 inch it is huge I can see he bulge!!
89. Soma pill head - January 23, 2009 7:00 PM
I bet he has like an 11 Incher!!! for sure at least 10 1/2 inch it is huge I can see his bulge!!