Jan 26 2009John Mayer inspires himself

I'm pretty sure that John Mayer is not nearly as funny as he thinks he is...

First you fucking hairy twats!

im confused... ?

...goddamn quick-triggered false gods....motherfucker...

who does this deuche cunt thing he is?!

who does this deuche cunt think he is?!

FIFTH........OH YEAH!!!!

FIFTH........OH YEAH!!!!

FIFTH........OH YEAH!!!!

John Mayer's mom must have praised him waaaaay too much.

@1 Agreed

You can tell he was on set thinking this was going to be the funniest new viral video around and all the cool kids would be watching it and talking about how cool John Mayer is.

"Man, I wish John Mayer had his own show."

"I know, it's that Jennifer Aniston dragging him down. He was totally still at the top of his career before she came around."

YOU'RE THE BEST! AROUUUND! NO-ONE'S GONNA EVAH BEAT YOU DOWN!!

"You're the best around no ones ever gonna beat you down"

Nice Karate Kid reference, John.

10...9...8...7...

(countdown until OC Dee writes something like "This video is funny. John is very talented, funny, smart, tall, sexy, and has full kissable lips. I look forward to seeing John in concert this summer in Irvine CA.")

...6....5...4...3...

^ Ha! Beat you to it. GET DOWN ON IT! UH-UH! GET DOWN ON IT!

I'm writing to his high school principal - clearly Mayer didn't get nearly enough beatings.

He's the type of guy who, true, will lick you until you have multiple orgasms. But at some point you're going to have to pay way more attention to his butthole than you'd ever want to.

@12

TRY TO BEST CAUSE YOU'RE ONLY A MAN AND A MAN'S GOTTA LEARN TO TAKE IT...

@12

TRY TO BE BEST CAUSE YOU'RE ONLY A MAN AND A MAN'S GOTTA LEARN TO TAKE IT...

What a wanker!

His fans have a lot to answer for.

He has the perpetual shit-eating grin of a self-fister.

what a blithering idiot!!! He really thinks he is funny? Geezzz.. Brad is not the funniest guy in the world but at least he got a lot of people thinking he was being kidnapped hahahaha. This is certain proof that Jen is also an idiot cos, how can you hook up with such a huge idiot if you are not one yourself, I mean... how can you stand him?

ill say it,,,i like john mayer

Actually, to add some actual input. I think he's just really happy with where he is in his life right now. That's why he can and probably will continue to do stuff like this. Even if he does something so stupid that no one will buy his music anymore he will still live comfortably and knowing full well that he did exactly what he wanted to.

You can just see it in his face and the way he talks.

I haven't even watched the video, but it's apparant to me the dude tries to compare himself to Pitt a lot, like he's trying to fill his shoes. Your John "Doucheboy" Mayer, not Hollywood elite. Get over yourself.

I'll agree if "he's just really happy" is changed to "he's just really self-satisfied."

Smith, while I don't want to do this, I'd have to say that we can indeed change it to "he's just really self-satisfied"

Too late. Now we're having cybersex. What are you wearing?

Maybe Jennifer Aniston IS the right girl for him. She's perfected her fake frozen smile, so she'll be ok watching stuff like this.

#14

I am wearing a big grin right now knowing you remember my posts. I love John’s sense of humor. He is not afraid to take risks and I thought his video was very funny. I love his facial expressions and body language too. The Mr. Rogers sweater and little boys tie is hillarious. I would love to jam with John while I play my bass guitar.

Some of the best career suicide you will ever witness. After Jen dumps him he can go back to the few stalker groupies that are left and relative anonymity.

John Mayer is DESPERATE for attention. If the photos of him running around with Jen isnt enough attention for him, then I seriously do not know what his problem is (ADHD maybe). Hes not funny. He's actually selfish. I'm positive that Jennifer Aniston would prefer it if he'd just shut his mouth. She's an A-List celebrity...and she's constantly being compared to her gorgeous ex-husband, and his insanely beautiful woman. They are taken much more seriously than Jen and Mayer, and I'm certain that if Jen could have it her way...John Mayer would keep his mouth closed. She's just dick whipped at the moment, but eventually, he'll get on her nerves. Or he'll cheat on her! Bottom Line.

#31 - actually I processed the restraining order so it's sort of natural to monitor the situation.

John is a talented dude comfortable in his own skin. He must be an incredible lover because Jen cannot stay away from John for too long.

I like John Mayer. I like his music and think he's a good guy.

Am... am I gay?

36
No you are a dude who is not afraid to be you.

Oh Please!
Was that supposed to be funny? I didn't laugh once.
All I saw was a pathic loser, trying to be funny.
God, when is he and that stupid bitch Annoyiston going to just fall off a cliff, or get hit by a bus? Can they ever speak one sentence without using or refering to Brad and Angie?
I've heard of people being bitter, but this is way beyond the norm.
Obsession, they are obsessed. Wow, they need to make a movie about this shit cause in a minute we'll be hearing how Jennifer went to Brads' house and blew them away, kidnapped thier kids and tortured themand killed them one by one because they weren't hers and Brads. Pathetic.

36. Yes

what a steaming pile of nothing.

I like John Mayer. I think he's cute. His music isn't half bad. And I like his dry sense of humor and the fact that he can make fun of himself and not take things too seriously.

Besides, while we are all wasting time posting on a celebrity blog he's off actually being a celebrity. So who is cooler now?

We are.

He "make fun of himself" in completely contrived and self-aware manner. That earns you an automatic FAIL.

And I wrote 'He "make fun of himself"' as an intentional tribute to Native Americans.

Your body is a wonderland
Your body is a wonder (I'll use my hands)
Your body is a wonderland
Your body is a wonderland

Da da dup ba da da da
Ba ba dup ba la la la
Ba ba dup ba ba da da
Ba ba dup ba da da da
Ba ba dup ba ba da da
Ba ba dup ba da da da
Ba ba dup ba ba da da
Ba ba dup ba da da da

fucking WORST MUSIC EVER

I liked that, he is quite funny!

36 definitely

I enjoy his older stuff more.

Fish guessed correctly. This video definitely makes me think John Mayer eats human flesh; little kids who go missing and are never found. Mayer needs their blood to prepare pastries. He also makes a dip out of their little testicles and serves it to guests at parties.

Both Mayer and Aniston need be charged, arrested, and have their homes searched.

He believes the lies his fans tell his douche bag ass.

Why is he always humping Brads ass. Jen is pathetic looks like John is to. No more shitty concert tickets. He can shove them up his gay a$$.
I don't find him funny at all but I guess he will call on the CAA mighty
Team to make his career for him.

who says not?
then guess you better see what hot and sincere cougars on " Agelessmate.com " are saying about her!! BTW, it's the place where Ageless people meet and mingle! Nothing but love rules there!!

When will he get his balls back from Jen. Too bad she would not let him look at TCCOBB. That's why I would not hook up with a mom. John's into that shit along with guys.

I liked the "Making Music with John Mayer" one way better. This didn't entertain me in the least.

This is what they call: A NEVER ENDING STORY, folk!!

John is trying to help Jen start up the triangle again after Brad almost killed it.
Jen and John need it to sell their shit.

Now John need the triangle to sell his stuff since it worked for Jen and that stupid dog movie.

At 45

Not trying to be sarcastic or mean or anything but if you actually read his lyrics then you will see that that song is actually a lot more poetic then most people would think.

58, the fuck are you smoking? No, I don't want any.

I'm pretty sure T.S. Eliot would rather be called an American than write something as fucking stupid as "Swimming a deep sea of blankets." That whole song is predicated on one hackneyed prism through which one observes love. It sounds like a 15 year old with a high opinion of himself wrote it.

Whether it's a sophomoric attempt at satire or sincerity, my sentiment remains the same: John Mayer must be beaten.

as much as his music sounds like a goddamn dave matthews wannabe, and the fact that he's a pussy whipped bitch....i DO find him funny. when he was on Chapelle's Show, that was fun.

if i'm being honest...

Well, the Chapelle thing was funny, because of, well, you know, CHAPELLE.

I mean please, if you're looking for boytoy popsters who are actually TRULY funny, please reference Justin Timberlake. His non-spoken cameo in 'Jizz in My pants,' was f-cking hilarity, and dont get me started on dick in a box.

This guy, John Gayer? Please.

You can't be funny when you are this self absorbed and self aware, it's why his cougar gf was the least funny thing on Friends. When your nippelage and layer cut upstage you, you gotta know you ain't shit. Hence dogs, children and the buterscotch post suicidal stallion doing the same in 2009.

If you want funny, go check out US magazine giving Perez Hilton an official polygraph about just how far down his throat Mayer was at a party. Now that cracked my shit up big time.

Hint: Perez passes with flying colors.

I like nipples

All comedians famous or not have bombed big time in their life. Comedians take this chance and John Mayer is no different. I thought this clip was super funny. John makes himself available to the media and I love him. I love the clip on tie!

he was funny on Chapelle, but he didn't really do in acting, it was just a set up scene that he played music in.

I watched the video and agree with the poster that called it a "steaming pile of nothing".

I also agree he's a Dave Matthews wannabe.

That was the stupidest waste of 2 minutes of my life I will never get back. And I like John Mayer's older stuff, too, but good lord, get over yourself already!

This guy is a tool. What is it he's done that I should give have a fuck about him? Oh, that's right, Jennifer Aniston.

i love it when he talks about brad's movie (the curious case of benjamen button) and then says I never saw that movie by the way ha ha yeah right !