Dec 29 2008Jennifer Lopez & El Skeletor to remain married
- Jennifer Lopez, despite rumors to the contrary, is not getting a divorce, according to her rep. Oh, well, if her rep says so, then it must be true. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to get one of these rep people to tell a child support judge I've been sterile my entire life. Infallible logic wins again! [E! Online]
- Jessica Simpson's boyfriend Dallas quarterback Tony Romo collapsed in the shower after suffering a rib injury in yesterday's game against the Eagles. At this time, I'd like to point out to Jessica Simpson that all my ribs are in working order. Just putting it out there on the off-chance she learned to read recently. Ha, who am I kidding? [ESPN]
- Chris Martin can apparently walk among us normal folks without being recognized. Seems no one knows who the Coldplay singer is despite the fact he bangs Gwyneth Paltrow. I'm failing to see the problem here. Does he want people to know he diddles a woman who's one Pilates class away from looking from Madonna? I'd keep that on the down-low, Jim. It's Chris? Okay, sure. [Page Six]
- Oprah Winfrey has been duped by another memoir writer. After raving over Holocaust survivor Herman Rosenblat's novel Angel at the Fence about meeting his wife in a concentration camp, the story has been debunked and canceled by the publisher. Which is great, just great. Now who's going to pitch my memoir Yes, Ladies, It's That Big, Shoots Diamonds, Gives Back Rubs and Knows How to Maximize Deductions for the Tax Return You Deserve!? Sonofa.... [TMZ]
Reader Comments
1. Alice - December 29, 2008 4:05 PM
FIRST!....
2. EverybodylovesROUGHers - December 29, 2008 4:08 PM
Oyyshh Poor Steadman!
3. p0nk - December 29, 2008 4:14 PM
if he handles the soap the way he handles a pigskin, it's no wonder.
4. F-Obama - December 29, 2008 4:16 PM
I'd still bang her
5. Savalas - December 29, 2008 4:21 PM
Haha Oprah you suck twinkies!
6. ph7 - December 29, 2008 4:38 PM
Nice cans. Her face only looks good after hours with the makeup artist, though.
7. Obama the Messiah - December 29, 2008 4:40 PM
If Obama can pull the wool over her eyes, its no wonder she got duped again.
8. Cash - December 29, 2008 4:42 PM
Uh... pulled from the shelves? Rosenblat's book wasn't even scheduled for publication until February. Do you even read these stories before commenting on them?
9. This Poster - December 29, 2008 4:49 PM
Anyone posting after This Poster sucks on El Skeletor's boner
10. Randal - December 29, 2008 5:00 PM
Dearest Fish,
I thought that was our little secret. I cannot understand you publishing your memoirs when you said you wouldn't. Please, if you do, at least have the courtesy of changing my name. I did as you wanted and did not swallow. I spit all of those lovely diamonds out onto that hairy belly of yours and let you top me while giving me those scrumptous back rubs.
So, please, if you love me like you say you do, at least change my name to Rough Daddy or something.
Yours forever,
Randal
11. This Poster - December 29, 2008 5:39 PM
Nevermind my post #9, I'm just so obsessed with sucking cock that I can't help myself. Carry on as if I were nobody. Oh, wait....I am a nobody. Nevermind me at all!
12. Dave - December 29, 2008 5:44 PM
Excellent news since nothing is more fitting than a shitstain douchebag celebrity being married to a shitstain douchebag celebrity. Talk about karma! It's the only thing celebrities are good for; marrying another douchebag asswipe celebrity and then they spend the rest of their lives making eachother miserable.
13. max - December 29, 2008 5:49 PM
Oprah looks like she's been face down in the bologna. And the bbq ribs. And the french fries. And the burgers. And the apple pie. And the cherry pie. Wait...she's been face down in all the food she sees.
It's a see food diet. She sees food, she eats food.
14. tp - December 29, 2008 5:53 PM
Chris Martin is the uglies human being to walk the earth. And their daughter ain't far behind!!
15. the Artist formerly known as Randal - December 29, 2008 5:54 PM
Creepy, sleazy poster #10:
Looks like you failed to read the memo I sent out to good people in which I stated I no longer post under that name. Nice try though, for an illiterate dunce such as yourself.
Cheers,
the Artist formerly known as Randal
16. webterractive - December 29, 2008 7:10 PM
I'm glad Jennifer Lopez and "Skeletor" Marc Anthony are staying together it's good for their kids. Tony Romo is a pussy, but then again a rib injury must be painful. So what if Chris Martin wants to be incognito, I bet that weird guy beside me in the bus is the #3 shareholder for Microsoft Corp. as you never know who people are when they're in plain sight. Oprah should read her books before she promotes them, but then again that would stop the money train that the Oprah book club gets from naive readers who think their God read this book.
17. THAT_GIRL_JENN - December 29, 2008 7:34 PM
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
IM A WORTHLESS SACK OF ASS VOMIT. I SAY RACIST SHIT SHIT CUZ IM JEALOUS, SOMEONE SHOULD STOMP THE MASS OF PIG SHIT I CALL MY
BRAIN OUT OF MY RACIST FAT HEAD, I SHOULD DRINK BLEACH UNTIL I DIE FACE DOWN IN A SEPTIC TANK, IM A SAD, FAT, WORTHLESS WASTE OF
HUMAN LIFE. DRUNK PRISONERS WOULDNT FUCK ME FOR $1,000,000,
THE ONLY FUNNY THING I COULD WRITE WOULD BE A SUICIDE NOTE!
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
18. friendlyfires - December 29, 2008 9:44 PM
J-Lo .... sing-lo
J-Simp ... less Romo
P-trow ... D-Vors-o
Win-frO ... Dodo
19. mimi - December 29, 2008 10:21 PM
JLo is certainly looking worn and haggard these days sans the plastic surgery.
She is through. Old. Her appeal is done for.
20. Rev. Al Sharpton - December 29, 2008 11:19 PM
First thing, J-Lo and Latino Gay Boy can go puff on a big dick! Neither one of them mothafuckas got any talent to speak of anyway. Secondly....Tony Homo, the Cowboys, T.O., Jessica and any other mothafuckas that look like them can also go and inhale some dicks. Oh and Chris Martin must go and suck some dick just because I said so! And Oprah needs to hop on the treadmill and dump about 200 pounds.....and then go suck some dick!
21. Dustin - December 30, 2008 12:00 AM
It's actually "Angel at the Fence," just so you know.
22. gerard Vandenberg - December 30, 2008 12:10 AM
gloria's words: RYTHM IS GONNA GET YOU, jenn.
.................BET?
23. Notice - December 30, 2008 1:09 AM
The author of post #20 is clearly, beyond any reasonable doubt, obsessed with sucking cock. Perhaps someone will be kind and patient enough to provide said poster with an endless supply of cocks to suck. Then maybe the little asswipe won't have time to post online and virtually stink the place up.
With that said, hopefully JenLo and Skeletor will stay together and live unhappily everafter, fulfilling some monumental karma. I mean what could be worse than spending your years listening to some whiney, fit throwing, spoiled brat bitch and moan constantly? They deserve to be sentenced to life together.
24. Frankly Freaky - December 30, 2008 7:37 AM
#15
To the Artist formerly known as Randal:
I think you're creepier. Who would ever admit to being the dweeb Randal? You got some serious creepiness going on! Not to mention some unresolved issues with your mother. Lighten up and quit being so sensitive. Like any of this has meaning...
25. 1127 - December 30, 2008 12:15 PM
She looks terrific.
26. Walkere - December 30, 2008 11:26 PM
would it be shocking if they divorced.............
27. Tonya - January 3, 2009 2:51 AM
How awful that the Rosenblats lied about their story and that the publishers and movie makers fell for it. Boy in the Striped Pajamas, which was a great book and now movie, never pretended to be true. The Rosenblats, like Madoff, are harming the good Jewish name and it's terrible.
I read a New York Times article about Stan Lee and Neal Adams the comic book artists supporting another TRUE Holocaust love story. There was a beautiful young artist, Dina Gottliebova Babbitt, who painted Snow White and the Seven Dwarves on the children's barracks at Auschwitz to cheer them up. Dina's art became the reason she and her Mother survived Auschwitz.
Painting the mural for the children caused Dina to be taken in front of Dr. Mengele, the Angel of Death. She thought she was going to be gassed, but bravely she stood up to Mengele and he decided to make her his portrait painter, saving herself and her mother from the gas chamber as long as she was doing painting for him.
Dina's story is true because some of the paintings she did for Mengele in Auschwitz survived the war and are at the Auschwitz Birkenau Museum. Also, the story of her painting the mural of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs on the children's barrack has been corroborated by many other Auschwitz prisoners, and of course her love and marriage to the animator of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs the Disney movie after the war in Paris is also a fact.
I wish Oprah would do a story about Dina and her art not about the Rosenblats who were pulling the wool over all our eyes.