Oct 10 2008Hugh Hefner's new twin girlfriends have an assault record (I'm aroused)

i heard they beat kimbo slice also! 1st

They look totally different without make up on...sweet....I'm not saying they're not hot...just sayin'...must have had it set on whore. (Simpson's quote, FYI)

That's hot! An assult record. Oh how heaven must feel to have these incredible twins pounding, squeezing, smothering and kicking my body around. WOW.

Lee--perhaps they used their cold cream gun? LOVE classic Simpsons quotes!

Lee--perhaps they used their cold cream gun? LOVE classic Simpsons!

Trashy and full of makeup. :)

All worthless no talent whores have skeletons in their closet just like Kim Kardaskank!

time for them to hit the gym
theyve got a bigger beer gut than Homer Simpson.
not cute at all
just 2 white trash bitches.
nuttin special.

Wow, Makeup is really magical, they can turn ordinary ugly ass proactiv-needing criminal hos into playboy material (oh that and a LOT of airbrushing)

These twins are not all that attractive, to be honest. Go to any college football game in the south and you'll see thousands of chicks way hotter than these two. Of course, if they bang Hef together, I am sure their parents would have to be very proud of how they raised these girls. Since it is normal for 19 year old to make to make it with 82 year old limp dicks. Losers.

They have nice belly buttons.

I was wondering when Hugh was going to launch his new girlfriends. Just a matter of time before we start carrying sex toys named after them. (I run a sex toy company, hence the joke). LOL

Nice to see he's still giving alcohol to minors.

@8 Jealous annie?

I read a blurb about this today and assumed the twins were black.

#15 - nah, Hef's downward slide hasn't gone that far. Yet.

They're naked and covered in paint in that photo. Is that really SFW?

I-ba want-ba to-ba be-ba in-ba Playboy-ba!

Is....that..........Tara Reid on the right?

Why?

Is....that..........Tara Reid on the right?

Why?

I stuttered.

Guuuuuuuttttt.

Fatties.

Rough semi-involuntary sex is always hot, but with these two it'd be awesome. They're big and mean and violent, and their tears at the end would be so sweet.

@23 That is pretty good troll. Did yo make that all up by yourself or did you read that some where?

they can beat me all the time

Kim K. should take note - you can have a big fat ass, but it doesn't have to be hairy and smelly too.

Twins Basil, twins!

.

It was in your dad's diary, about you and your mom.

As far as I am concerned this old Ashkenazi is a child molestor. Just saying as they say.

You are pretty funny troll.

"As far as I am concerned this old Ashkenazi is a child molestor."

Only in America. You have many, many young girls who look like hardened pros.

Why does he insist on keeping this charade going?

damn i so fucking jealous

Golly gee, 'ol Hef's looking mighty "erectificated" with those two honeys flanking him on both sides. Eighty-five years young and still burying his "nookillur" missle in those hot young silos...man, that's the life!

On another note, our economy is strong and we're all gonna get through this?

whatevs yall they dont look that bad in their mugshots, thats worth somethin

Are those...nipples on the chick on the right...?
A man can dream hopefully

I agree with #35. Their mug shots look like they're ready for a little hair-pulling doggiestyle @ 2am. They seem to be pretty good show-up-at-midnight fuck buddies, high on alcohol, drugs, and running over a pedestrian on the way over. That's good for a lot of orgasms.

No boobs, big beer guts at 19 years old, this is what a playboy bunny looks like now? No wonder the company is tanking!!!

Sorry, but it just seems pathetic to know that these whores are only after you for your money. Otherwise, they'd rather jump into a volcano than suck his shriveled smelly genitals

Actually I admire Hef - he'll accept whatever tramps who are willing to lick his revolting shriveled saggy varicose-veins-bagged balls. Just like all you fake-macho hairy beer-bellied losers talk tough here but will glad accept any action you get from girls twice as fat as the blob on the right.

Damn lucky old bastard...

I hate him and want to fuck his girlfriends.

Hugh must not have one person in the world who loves him. If he did, they would say, "What in the fuck are you doing? You look like a complete idiot."

Check out those mugshots. Those two have got frikkin' MUSTACHES for eyebrows. It looks like they waxed away about 3/4ths of their forehead to get those brows down to something manageable. Daiyummm.

@36

All three are topless wearing latex body paint.

Trashy white whores are fun to fuck - once, when you're both drunk and horny and the cute girl spilled the drink you put the roofie in - but man, afterward they cut the rankest farts on earth.

At least they are "real " women. They don't have insanely ridiculous, nose jobs, collagen injections, or boob jobs. I'd forgotten what it was like to see real women any more.

I know that I always wanted to get naked together with my sister and watch her take a cumshot in the face and mouth.

I'm just a naive, small-town guy from the tundra north of Toronto and all this Hefner stuff confuses me. Could someone please explain what the term "girlfriend" means in the context of Hugh Hefner. I mean, they're not really doing it with him, are they? I feel like this is some sort of in-joke that everyone but me knows about.

@47

I've always wanted that, too, Susan. Your sister is HOT!

Their boobs look natural. How novel for Hugh Hefner.

By the way, Hugh who? I remember when I was little my grandfather told me he went to something called a Playboy club where women dressed as rabbits served drinks while men pinched their asses. Then one time in high school I saw a magazine called Playboy that had a few airbushed pictures of sometimes mostly naked empty-headed women, plus lots of ads for cheap cologne and stereo components. It's true. I saw it.

Jimbo,

Your trolls have been out in force the last 24 hours or so. Only one person I've seen has actually fallen for it.

Susan,

Will you marry me?

Lol, this just gets better and better.

#50 Give it a few weeks. They will be pumped full of silicone

Susan,
Please paste photos and video clips. Thanks in advance.

Hef is the John McCain of sex. He was a valiant warrior for many decades, but it's clearly time for a mercy killing.

I'd call them c u m whores, but we all know that The Hef can't deliver the juice anymore. So just plain old whore will have to do for them both now.

It must be a nice jump going from the trailer park to the PB mansion. And to think, all they have to do is suck on and mount a small, wrinkly 82 year old cock. And this time it doesn't belong to grandpappy. They must be in heaven.

Those bitches aren't that hot even with makeup. They look like average plain jane sacks. Hef's standards are slipping badly. His hottest girlfriend ever was Barbie Benton. She's an old bag now, but she was fine as hell back in her day.

Just wait and watch....those twins are gonna turn on each other and beat each other for Hef *LOL*

Death match...(not sure who my money is on jusss yet) hehe :)

Just wait and watch....those twins are gonna turn on each other and beat each other for Hef *LOL*

Death match...(not sure who my money is on jusss yet) hehe :)

These girls arent even fat nor chubby. Some people dont know what a gut is. Look up muffin top and see horrors you can only imagine ;_;

Wonder what you guys plan on doing for sex when you're 85. If you have the choice of making it with another 85 year old or a hot 19 year old, which one would you pick?

These girls sure have tempers. If Hef is found beaten to death in his bed, these would be the first suspects.

Do they have to change his diapers on an hourly basis?

I just realized those are painted on bra's cool

Ew, they are so unattractive. How could he go from Holly, Kendra, and Bridgette, to this. These girls make the old girlfriends look like super models.. I mean, when I think of classy, I think of those two... dang.. Yes, I am being sarcastic.

they are NOT fat by any means.. but as far as Hollywood and Playboy standards, I will have to agree that they need to hit the damn treadmill. One has much more of a protruding gut than the other though.

why do people really think that Hef is banging these girls? At 82 years old a sex-drive is bellow minimum, even with viagra its still going to be near impossible for him to have sex. He might have a heart attack...

why are people so dumb as to think he actually bones them? I bet they fondle each other and it ends at that.

LOL those girls don't have beer guts. WTF is wrong with you?

YUCK fat whores

Nevermind all this nonsense, did anyone fingered her in the line up?

Really? These 2? Hef, you're rich man, you can do better then skanky stupid criminal hoes, who A. aren't pretty B. Actually a downstep from holly and kendra C. stupid, really really stupid looking......Hugh heffner is just looking like an idiot now.

I'm amazed!

They don't have the prerequisite fake tits - yet!

All "girlfriends" get something like $1K a week, free room and board, and all the plastic surgery they want.

And Hef does like the fake titties on his granddaughters, I mean girlfriends, I mean hookers.

What I say?!
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2 more prostitutes, only in America could prostitutes be celebs.

IS THERE A PROBLEM, houston?

IS THERE A PROBLEM, houston?

Yeah, Leona. Trashy, full of make-up and orangey. Yuk!

Liked the other girls better. These two are trashy as can be. Definitely miss Holly :(.

Hef is scraping the bottom of the trailer park for white trash. Next thing you know, his girlfriends will be LaShonda and ShaNayNay from the ghetto

Who else thinks they look better in the mugshots than smothered in makeup? Especially shot #2. Lookin' kinda pouty.

I'd let them rough me up a bit.

Dem be pot-bellied fugs.

Florida? I'm not surprised. I defy you to name a NOT trashy woman that state has produced.

"Well, at least they're not dating a feeble old man with tons of cash laying around."

*LOL*
Thats gold, bro!

Ahh...the twins on those twins aren't bad.

"Well, at least they're not dating a feeble old man with tons of cash laying around. Wait..."

*LOL*
Ahh, thats perfect!

Still...the twins on those twins are nice.

The pudgier one is really cute.. the other one is fug.

my g-d white chicks need alot of makeup... [if those ashen beasts are supposed to be the be-painted hotties beforehence that is...] ughhhh disgusting - thank goodness for melanin & exoticness

I'm sure that they're both very much in in love with Hef.

Ew, ew, and ew.

Downgrade. Every single one of the Girls Next Door is hotter, even Grandma Bridget. These girls couldn't even make the magazine but Hef is 'dating' them. His stock has dropped. The thin one's ok. Her fat sister needs to staple her mouth shut.

will he die already. seriously i want to find and kill him. he looks like a god damn idiot. he must be insanely depressed......

@92 I've wondered if he feels a bit empty.

"And the girl at the grocery store, she might be my girlfriend, and that nice lady who brings me pudding and plays scrabble with me on Wednsdays, she might also be my girlfriend, too..."

The man has no problem with that, folks.
be honest: WHY SHOULD HE?

Just remember: Slapping soon-to-be-ex boyfriends for saying and club bouncers for telling them to get off the speakers = assault / battery.

Odds are these girls are just two spoiled brats who throw stuff and hit people when they don't get their way.

I think Hef is kinda cute and I would not mind being with him.

ha! classy as usual, Hef.

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Gross. Those two girls look underage, are packing the freshman 15 and are wearing too much of mommy's makeup. This is why Playboy is nearly bankrupt (and Suicidegirls are kicking ass). The "Playboy look" is so outdated.

Heffner is a man-child.