Oct 24 2008Anne Hathaway's ex gets 4 1/2 years in prison
Raffaello Follieri, the con-man ex-boyfriend of Anne Hathaway, was sentenced to 4 1/2 years in prison yesterday stemming from his guilty plea to 14 counts of wire fraud, money laundering and conspiracy. Raffaello had claimed he was a Chief Financial Officer for the Vatican and bilked real estate investors out of millions of dollars. People reports:
Through an interpreter, Follieri delivered a statement, in which he said, "The most important thing I want the court to know is I was not raised with bad values. … I started off with good intentions, determined to run an honorable business and make everyone proud of me."
But, he admitted, "What I did was wrong and there is no point in making excuses. … I will never be able to wash away the shame. … I just hope that someday those who have been hurt by my actions will forgive me."
Wait. Why the hell did Raffaello need an interpreter? He dated Anne Hathway for years and you're telling me the guy doesn't speak English. Jesus. How does that even work?
ANNE: Raffaello, what you just tried to do requires consent from your lover first. You don't want to surprise a lady with that, uh, kind of entrance.
RAFFAELLO: What if I a-show you a, how you say, photographs, of me with-a the pope-a?
ANNE: You showed me those when you left the toilet seat up.
RAFFAELLO: I'm-a so sorry. I no speak-a the English.
ANNE: But you've worked in a New York City real estate office for years.
RAFFAELLO: I make-a the meatballs!
Reader Comments
1. first - October 24, 2008 10:52 AM
HA! NICOclub pwns!
2. Community Servant - October 24, 2008 10:53 AM
Does she need conjugal visits while he's locked up? I view it as my civic duty to provide her with them...
3. Dr. Otto VanDerWahl - October 24, 2008 11:03 AM
Now her Cleveland Steamers will look like a quaint, erotic activity from the past.
4. Mr.Peanut - October 24, 2008 11:08 AM
After seeing her in Havoc, I would SO do her!
She'd say "Give me 12 inches!" so I'd fuck her six times!
***crickets***
Thank you, I'll be here all week.
5. SaraDevil - October 24, 2008 11:08 AM
Meatballs were just the beginning of Anne's problems.
6. Dirk the Magnanomous - October 24, 2008 11:13 AM
I hear Websters is going to put his picture next to the word "stupidest".
He was banging that, and he blew it over $$$. That makes him way beyond stupid!!!
7. Turd - October 24, 2008 11:15 AM
She likes anal. I like her. McCain supporters fuck goats and watch NFL games.
8. FRIST!!! - October 24, 2008 11:21 AM
Does that mean Scrubs is cancelled??
9. Binky - October 24, 2008 11:35 AM
Anne: You mean you've been lying to me ?
Raff'o : Is the Pope Catholic ?
Anne : Oh. ok.
10. mamadough - October 24, 2008 11:41 AM
good job judge, you did find all those kitten heads i left in your bed.
11. Borat - October 24, 2008 12:23 PM
I think Peter Griffin best summarized the Italian intellect:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9JhuOicPFZY
12. Boinky - October 24, 2008 12:46 PM
Anne: You mean you've been lying to me ?
Raff'o : Is the Pope the leader of an organization dedicated to attracting and protecting pedophile rapists?
Anne : Oh. ok.
13. Parker - October 24, 2008 1:02 PM
If I was a sleazy italian real estate swindler I'd hook up with her and never have to put my cock in a vag again. I'd just stuff it in her ass every day. All anal all the time.
14. James - October 24, 2008 1:15 PM
"Boppa-da-boopa-da-beebadeebeebee?"
15. James - October 24, 2008 1:17 PM
Ah, Borat you beat me too it.
16. James - October 24, 2008 1:18 PM
Ah, Borat you beat me to it.
17. Plastic Strugeon - October 24, 2008 1:39 PM
Raffi speaks English better than you and me put together. I hope no one here buys that he doesn't speak English. In addition to Italian and English, Raffi is fluent in "douche".
18. Plastic Sturgeon - October 24, 2008 1:39 PM
Raffi speaks English better than you and me put together. I hope no one here buys that he doesn't speak English. In addition to Italian and English, Raffi is fluent in "douche".
19. Dave Allen - October 24, 2008 2:08 PM
Well, he "pitched" to her, now it's his time to "catch." Hope his cellmate uses some kind of lube.
20. blahblah - October 24, 2008 2:43 PM
I think the interpreter was translating the quote from English to Italian or Latin in order to deliver it to the Vatican. I dunno.
21. Binky - October 24, 2008 4:55 PM
#12 Continued.
Anne : Is the Pope Catholic ? I would have thought you'd have done a bit of research before you embarked on your schemes. I'm not helping you out here. I don't know how you got away with it for so long. Next I suppose you'll tell me your dad isn't really Chef Boyardee.
22. Julie - October 24, 2008 6:20 PM
Why does she look so happy with him in every picture ? He does not, however.
It appears that her feet were not planted on the ground and that she ignored reality. One suspects that she will be duped again by another fast talking guy.
Anne - get thee to a therapist ( from a fellow Vassar classmate)
23. lidsay - October 24, 2008 7:55 PM
Is is catch game or cougarhunter's game?
I mean, could they fit each other like others do? Not until I met all the beautiful people on __===== Agelessdate.c om =======__ May-December love, what a fantastic bond! maybe it just takes some time for some to appreciate the true love in this world!
24. weirdo - October 24, 2008 9:57 PM
She must be really gullible to fall for a guy like that. To believe all the bullshit this guy fed her....sheesh! Listen to me Anne, bend over and lift your skirt....I'm going to put a lot of Astroglide on my cock and sloooowly put it in you ass. I promise I won't go tooo fast....tell me if it hurts and I'll stop. LAUGH OUT FUCKING LOUD YOU STUPID BITCH! YOU JUST GOT PUNKD!
25. gerard Vandenberg - October 25, 2008 12:20 AM
HE LIKES ANAL?
So prison is "HIS PLACE", folks!!
26. SY - October 25, 2008 3:03 AM
"Through an interpreter!! I can only estimate that he is still a "Pretentious Fuck" who can't let go of the 'Self Indulgent" lifestyle he accustomed himself too....Instead of Accepting he is still in Denial of his fate and BS .....too much ego and no remorse....good luck raffi, I'm sure all your inmates are waiting for you and will be happy to interpret......
27. Binky - October 25, 2008 11:59 AM
re# 21
Well ok #9* continued.
Who the hell is Boinky?
28. LiLo For V-Prez 2008 - October 28, 2008 2:32 AM
He reminds me of that Kevin Trudeau guy on infomercials, except more slovenly and blubbery. Who's the other woman in the last pic?
29. Helen - October 29, 2008 5:06 AM
Wow... How amazing!!!!!I've heard they get each other on an age-gap dating club AgelessOnly.C O M, and now they are very satisfied with our current life.