Sep 29 2008Scarlett Johansson & Ryan Reynolds wed
Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds quietly wed this weekend in Canada, People reports:
Attended by only a handful of close friends and family, the ceremony was held at a remote wilderness retreat outside of Vancouver, B.C.
This is the first marriage for both. The couple had announced their engagement in May.
Ryan Reynolds can marry Scarlett Johansson wherever the hell he wants. I'm still going to try and squeeze her breasts through my monitor. I'm a man of princi- "SMASH!" .... Heh. *picks up phone* Hello, Tech Support. Yeah, another one. Uh huh. Last time, seriously. I promise. Uh huh. Fifteen minutes? Fantastic.
UPDATE: "SMASH!" Honest to God, I swear I felt a nipple that time.
Photos: Splash News
RELATED STORIES
Reader Comments
1. needAnAlias - September 29, 2008 9:50 AM
bomdigity bomb! today indeed is a good day. FRIST
2. sigh - September 29, 2008 9:54 AM
Saddest day in history.
3. jared - September 29, 2008 9:55 AM
Damn the fool who took those beautiful knockers off the market
http://www.beerngolf.com
4. ph7 - September 29, 2008 9:56 AM
Too bad you just can marry her boobs. Must easier to care for, and best return on investment.
5. Rough Daddy - September 29, 2008 10:00 AM
Yea, she's one classy bra buster...with natural lipses!!!!
6. SSZ - September 29, 2008 10:04 AM
Oh no, another of Esquire's Most Beautiful Woman winner taken.
She'll be back for me some day.
7. grobpilot - September 29, 2008 10:05 AM
Motorboat...........
8. Mdiz - September 29, 2008 10:14 AM
Best tits in Hollywood....PERIOD! (This coming from a motorboating sonofa bitch!)
9. farty_mcshitface - September 29, 2008 10:17 AM
so miss overated married some guy. bfd!
she ain't ugly but, she ain't so great either. women like lacey chabert are so much hotter!!
10. gerard Vandenberg - September 29, 2008 10:19 AM
The one and ONLY reason he maried this"EMPTY SKULL" are those damn big TITS!!
I'M ONE HONDRED PERCENT SURE!!
be honest: WHAT ELSE?
11. blah - September 29, 2008 10:22 AM
Ugly dress, over rated girl. And isn't she lesbo & Ryan gay? I'm confus-ed. Maybe she's the "man" in the relationship; with her manly voice. But I must say, I do love me some Ryan Reynolds comedies; the guy is good. Well, what can I say?...its Monday morning and I'm a bitch. Shut up bitch. Yeh, shut it.
12. Brutor - September 29, 2008 10:29 AM
"I now pronounce you man and wife. You may motorboat the bride."
13. Woody Allen - September 29, 2008 10:30 AM
I guess she won't be sucking on my cock anymore
14. havoc - September 29, 2008 10:30 AM
Aside from the tits. This is hardly earth-shattering.
.
15. Dr. Otto Van DerWahl - September 29, 2008 10:38 AM
Married in Canada. I sense there is some homosexual activity here
16. The celebrity town - September 29, 2008 10:47 AM
What a nipple! I can feel it thru the canvas. Thanks thesuperficial!
17. combustion8 - September 29, 2008 10:53 AM
she's so overrated and very average looking at that.
18. fat balding loser - September 29, 2008 11:00 AM
She doesn't look good at all. I bang better looking chics all the time
19. HorribleJudgment - September 29, 2008 11:05 AM
I heard during the reception that Alanis Morissette came repelling in on wires, screeching and screaming, with her teeth bared. Many guests at first thought she was some type of whale (poor Alanis has put some weight on). She then repelled down onto Ryan Reynold's douchey back, and sunk her teeth into his neck, pulling out his larynx. It was some reception!
20. lithiumlilly - September 29, 2008 11:40 AM
I wanted Ryan Reynolds :(
I don't think she's ugly, but her cheeks and lips are kinda strange. RR was probably better off with Alanis. SJ is probably going to cheat on him.
21. Dr. John Thomas - September 29, 2008 1:00 PM
Another case of an average (at best) looking girl who is popular only because of her breasts. If she were an A Cup, she'd have been taking on the roles Lili Taylor had twenty years ago.
22. meee - September 29, 2008 1:02 PM
i like her, but why is she walking all hunched over & weird?
23. mamadough - September 29, 2008 1:03 PM
i agree #20, he'll be leaving her. i give it less than 2 years. ryan reynolds could make even the hardest, butchiest bull-dykes like #19 cream all over.
24. jennifer - September 29, 2008 1:26 PM
I love Ryan Reynolds. I think these two make a cute couple. Wonder if they will actually last past the typical H'wood one year mark?
25. true dat peeps - September 29, 2008 1:39 PM
big knockers, full cocksucking lips nice pale complexion, average face-she's a keeper-for now anyways i think i'd have her deepthroat me first so i could shoot my wad then last longer in her big ass
26. Spinna - September 29, 2008 3:34 PM
Very nice, I'd be motorboatin' all day.
27. Barack Hussein Obama - September 29, 2008 4:11 PM
Lousy actress and ugly flapjack breasts...but she's voting for ME!
28. Sueme - September 29, 2008 5:20 PM
Well congrats to her, and I hope it lasts.
29. naomi - September 29, 2008 5:36 PM
i'm so glad, i love her and him so much :)
30. Effyeray - September 29, 2008 6:35 PM
Dave Coulier is still cooler than Reynolds until Alanis sings about smokin' his pole......
31. lidsay - September 29, 2008 9:05 PM
She's so cute and adorable!!
All sexy young men and hot cougars on === Agelessdate.com === go crazy about her!! the place where hot cougars and sexy young men;and handsome old folks with sensual chicks meet and mingle! You may wanna check it out!LOL
32. getoverit - September 29, 2008 9:30 PM
i used to think she was great...but lately i have seen through the hype (and her snotty ass 'i'm smarter than you even though i don't have a degree and i lie about cohorting with politicians to feel important' attitude has been turning me off). i think i liked the idea of her...curvy, blonde, big boobs, classic but different, nice lips, good style...like really hot components but they were natural. now, when i look at it all together its just like 'blah' at best. still better than like kiera knightly or jordan or somethng. i think the best discription i have heard was 'pretty but dull and odd without distinction.'
33. xavierh - September 29, 2008 10:41 PM
In related news, I heard Alanis has a new album out, called "Fuck You, You Big-Breasted Whore." It's a concept album.
34. Lexoka - September 30, 2008 5:47 AM
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
:'(
35. brittney gean - September 30, 2008 8:55 PM
like have you seen her nast streched out boobs... omg... like ryan i totally think u need to get back with alanis.... omg, like she has total wife potential, scarlett has been with j.t and many others... so gross......
36. Plastique - October 1, 2008 11:55 PM
Listen, Alanis HAD her chance to get breast implants, but she passed on it. So, what choice did Ryan have?
37. natalie - October 4, 2008 1:18 PM
Hollywood wedding? I give it 8 months.
38. JP - October 27, 2008 9:37 AM
NOOOOOO!!!!!!! I HEAD YOU RYAN!!!!....MALDITA SEA XQ XQ XQ!!!!????????