Jun 13 2008Stifler: I had sex with Jessica Simpson
Stifler, whose real name is apparently Sean William Scott (I had no idea.), addressed the Internet rumors about why there's tension between him and Nick Lachey. Turns out Stifler and Jessica Simpson had what grown-ups call a "special hug." Here's my brief transcribing of what he said to WorldStarHip-Hop.com:
DJ Whoo Kid: I heard you had beef with Nick Lachey, man.
Stifler: Oh, 'cause I fucked Jessica Simpson?
[Assorted OH!'s, DAMN's, That is WACK!'s]
Stifler: No, but I did!
DJ Whoo Kid: One rumor out da way!
Why wasn't this bit of awesome included on the Dukes of Hazard DVD? And why did I just admit I watched said DVD? I should've admitted something a little less embarrassing - like I have chlamydia. Don't worry; I'm on antibiotics. Ladies.
Photos: Pacific Coast News
Reader Comments
1. Que - June 13, 2008 4:08 PM
Que hard!
2. Danielle - June 13, 2008 4:08 PM
...and then she farted.
3. beefytee - June 13, 2008 4:10 PM
I did too...and then Tim Russert came in her eye it was AWESOME!
4. Lola - June 13, 2008 4:11 PM
first.....
who hasn't had sex with j simpson????? sad sad little daddy's slut
5. Jenn - June 13, 2008 4:11 PM
It's definately Sean WILLIAM Scott
6. Pilatunes - June 13, 2008 4:14 PM
Beefytee, I fucked her before you did. Didn't you find my shorts in her bed?
You can almost here all the semen she's ingested through one orifice or another sloshing around inside her.
7. Jake Busey - June 13, 2008 4:18 PM
It would have been nice if they didn't cut off the audio and start talking about 50 cent or some bullshit. There's a 95% chance he was using a bit of the ol' "dry wit" considering the constant rumors that she was fucking EVERYONE on the set of that movie.
8. Tom - June 13, 2008 4:18 PM
Jessica is hot, but God damn is she boring. I've never liked hearing about this chick. Show me some pictures, yes, but please don't talk about her.
9. TakeOn - June 13, 2008 4:33 PM
I am vaguely familiar with Stifler's mother but the rest of those names mean nothing.
10. TakeOn - June 13, 2008 4:33 PM
I am vaguely familiar with Stifler's mother but the rest of those names mean nothing.
11. Danielle - June 13, 2008 4:36 PM
word son! .. G-Unit!!
12. Trover - June 13, 2008 4:37 PM
Big deal. We all know that Hollywood chicks are just glorified pin cushions. Not like this is any real revelation.
Next up, Dan Cook says he and Stifler 3-wayed JS in all holes.
13. Ted Mosby - June 13, 2008 4:38 PM
Her tits look awesome.
That being said, if these rumors are true, she had sex with Johnny Knoxville and Stiffler..She got herself some Bo and Luke Duke.
14. Gary - June 13, 2008 4:39 PM
Who the fuck is Dan Cook? Friend of yours?
15. Jakey - June 13, 2008 4:43 PM
I find that hard to believe, what with him being secretly gay and all.
16. EricLindros - June 13, 2008 4:49 PM
This story is nonsense.
Everyone knows Sean William Scott is a gay.
17. Shellz - June 13, 2008 4:55 PM
Anyone - and I mean ANYONE - who fucks and tells is a colossal piece of shit. I'm gay - we don't want this fucker on our team, you can have him. Prick.
18. snarkymalarky - June 13, 2008 5:21 PM
Jessica simpson is so over. She used to generate so much interest and attention. But her time is truly up; no one gives 2 shits about her or her family anymore. She should just settle down and have a family or something. The best she'll do in the future is write a book or something (ok, HAVE someone write a book for her is more like it). Wonder if she regrets f'ing things up with Nick; cus if the whole Stifler thing is what ended their marriage...I bet that sure wasn't worth it. And he's another one who's career has gone to the shitter...have you seen the movies he's done lately? But then, he really only had one good role.
19. nini - June 13, 2008 5:22 PM
Don't forget about Bam Magera in that little list of set men #13
20. nini - June 13, 2008 5:22 PM
Don't forget about Bam Magera in that little list of set men #13
21. Angel - June 13, 2008 6:11 PM
The actual conversation starts with an “internet rumor” they want to get out of the way. What internet rumor? You mean the one he just started? Are there any other women here who are sick of these assholes flapping their gums just for publicity? Three years later, he decides to spill the beans? Right…if he thinks this will kill the gay rumors or make us want to see his movie, then we should definitely show him how wrong he is.
22. The Green Piñata - June 13, 2008 6:42 PM
Christ....
23. anona - June 13, 2008 9:09 PM
More to the point, did any of the waiters catch her before she went home with her placemat?
24. anona - June 13, 2008 9:12 PM
I think it's funny that Madonna started to wear black roots with her bleach blonde hair to show she's not grey, presumably, and now every other hollywood girl has to follow suit!
25. vito bonespur - June 13, 2008 9:46 PM
Hey #17, I totally agree with you.
You were quite eloquent in calling him "a colossal piece of shit" and a prick. I'm a breeder and we don't want him either. Maybe the zoophiles will take him.
Then again, maybe not.
Hell, I'd love to be with Jessica Simpson (you listening, Jess?) and I sure as shit wouldn't tell anyone.
That dude is a real fucking asshole! (Never particularly liked him in his movies either.)
26. WhatsTheDeal - June 13, 2008 10:19 PM
Wow, Stifler! You gave her the "Stiff One", huh? Nice!!! Did she leave footprints all over the General Lee's windshield? Hey, was there a wet spot left in the passenger seat. Who cares? You're an asshole for opening your mouth. We now know Jessica Simpson has had sex with at least two "Douche Bags" in her lifetime. I'll let you guys ponder over who's the other one. Hint: His first name rhymes with "Dick"!
27. ash - June 13, 2008 11:21 PM
What a little shit. If Jess did partake in such a mistake he must have slipped her some date rape drug.
28. Mike - June 14, 2008 1:37 AM
Nice try, pole-puffer.
Like Tom Cruise, he is trying to imitate a macho heterosexual. This is a dead giveaway that he's gay, because there are no macho heterosexuals left anymore. Straight men have all become pussywhipped, bleeding-heart losers, completely dominated by women.
Kind of funny that the last refuge for the John Wayne archetype is with the gays in their little fantasy-land.
29. Mona - June 14, 2008 2:12 AM
Jessica Simpson got hit by the ugly stick recently so there's nothing to be proud of Seann with two ns.
The fact that he has two ns in his name.. is like "go and get two ks Nick and then we'll talk." Douchebag.
30. kelly - June 14, 2008 7:18 AM
What is this guy, in eighth grade? Sure, he porked Jessica Simpson, sure he did. And he's such a class act, he decided to announce it during a radio interview THREE YEARS LATER.
I call bullshit on this fuckwad.
Can't he just line up a decent beard like everyone else in Hollywood? I hear Liza Minelli is available.
31. gerard Vandenberg - June 14, 2008 1:25 PM
IT DIDN'T MAKE HER ANY SMARTER, or better, LESS STUPID!!
32. dystopia - June 14, 2008 2:46 PM
@5 It's definitely DEFINITELY.
33. Sunshine Superman - June 15, 2008 11:41 AM
Don't forget about Bam Magera in that little list of set men
guess she will fuck anyone.
34. Yup - June 15, 2008 4:38 PM
J E S S I C A S I M P S O N = Door Knob!
35. Brooke - June 21, 2008 8:29 AM
Great way to announce to the world that you are a homewrecker, Seann William Scott. I'd be proud of that if I were you (sarcasm)! I don't believe this is true...I believe the Jess/Johnny rumor more than I do the one you've just cooked up. Atleast, if Johnny did hook up with Jessica, he had the good sense to have it leaked quietly, like he didn't do it himself. Then, deny it when it became a huge rumor. Although, I guess if you'd just leaked the rumor about you and Jess, then no one would believe it (about like they are doing now) and it wouldn't ever make it to the press.