Apr 10 2008Paris Hilton BFF search not going so... hot?

frist

stupid bitch

stupid bitch

And of the 40 that were there, I bet 38 of them thought they were auditioning for American Idol 8

Nice shower curtain, Paris, what, did you rip that off Mrs. Roper on your way out of the apartment this morning??

What about he search for her dignity? How's that going?

actually, i'll bet the 40 that showed up were unemployed actors just trying to get face time on tv.

#6 Dignity? I think that she'd rather search for a cure...

AAAAAWWWWWWWWW,

Everyone is so mean to poor Paris Hilton. (Oh, sorry, I guess "poor" isn't the choice word here...) Gee, she's just a rich girl dating a rockstar trying to make her way in the world. Ease up, ya meanies.

heheheheheheh;)

TO: 7. unemployed actors - April 10, 2008 2:57 PM - actually, i'll bet the 40 that showed up were unemployed actors just trying to get face time on tv.

Totally agree... there is no possible way anyone in their right mind would want to be her flunky, I mean 'friend'. Gawd, you could NOT pay me enough to follow her around and pretend to like her!

I don't care about Pee Hilton. So, read this instead, retards. I spent all night drinking cheap tequila and eating cottage cheese. Now I have diarrhea. Uncontrollable diarrhea, the kind where when I laugh or take a deep breathe it leaks into my man-thong. It's a little on the green and corny side as well. When I went to wipe, my butt was so wet from my fecal sprinkler that my finger went right thru the toilet paper, and I jammed it right up my leaky anus. Now I can't wash the smell off, or stop sniffing my finger. I also thought I had to fart earlier, but I sure was wrong. Now my love-seat has a stain shaped like Oprah Winfrey right in the middle. My favorite cat, Chlamydia, is hiding. Well, off to the bathroom, my floppy sphincter is dripping again. Thanks for listening, all my friends.

@#5 = Mrs. Roper! Maan, that was a good laugh. thanks.

Paris can be my BFF... I mean whore and a half! Danm Tourettes!

re Hilton's dress: now I remember what vomit on the hallway floor in my elementary school used to look like. Thank God I don't have the accompanying smell.

love you Drippy Dick McGee - !!!

I just wanted to write something ...

... and there it was.

Damn it! Will she die already!?!?

@12 Coach I thought you were going to say that was the carpet pattern at Kroll's circa 1965.

@11 Sympathy for you friend, I been through that kind of tequilla damage.

Why is Owen Wilson wearing that awful dress and makeup?
........
Ohhhhhhhh, {*gives long stupid stare*}
Thats Paris

I did her after the show. She smelled of Benji.

why audition? so you can be publically ridiculed the same way paris is? i suppose you would deserve it for signing up for this suicide mission.

if she gives me 99.9% of all the money that she currently has and will have in the future, i'll be her bff :)

#20 Earl -- surely you mean that mangey mutt from the 70s movies right? Or do you mean that mangey mutt of a tattooed fuck of a boyfriend the cunt has?

UPDATE: I've decided just to sit in the bathtub where I can shit all over myself, without losing my page in "War and Peace". Please send bran.

Hmm. There were 40 people that showed up? I would have thought less. But seriously, folks. Paris is a wonderful person and a credit to the human race. We really should give her some sort of award for providing a home for the herpes virus. And I'm sure the wind whistling thru that vacuous and empty head provides a soothing sound to others wherever she goes. Kind of like the sounds of a rain forest.

Well, the bad turnout is reassuring to me, but then who the hell is responsible for those 149,000 MySpace friends she has?

26.....the 149,000 people who friended her, dumbass.

Wow the artards didn't show to support their idol? that is a shocker... they prolly couldn't all fit on the bus

A truly monumental post and as meaningful as anything I have read on this site (wipes tear with used tampon, then inserts in mouth). I love you kind sir!

Auditions to become her best friend?! Wow! Now *that* is pathetic!

Her mistake was in running the ad in the Thrifty Nickel. She should have made posters and tacked them onto telephone poles because her friends can't read.

11. That made me crack up, in a sick kind of way. Sorry though, but damn, funny shit!

Oh, yeah who cares about Paris..she needs to go away.

too bad the hiltons had to pay most of them to show up.

@ 34 "cora" sounds asian today...lol ha ha ha ha ha i bet benji was one of the ones that showed up...

Except there aren't even any half-price lattes.

See, this is the problem: the insiders are saying things like, "There were LESS than 40 people there," rather than, "There were FEWER than 40 people there."

This chick's an HEIRESS. WTF?

Do you get it now Paris?? 99.9% of the population HATES YOU.

Not me though.

Me: I promise I'll be your best friend if you let me punch you in the stomach as hard as I can.

Paris: Duh, ok.

Me: WHACK!!!

Paris: Uggghhhh! Will you still be my best friend?

Me: HA HA HA HA HA. No!

Paris always looks nice. Just like all of her photos on her personal profiles on millioniarelover.com. Many of us like!

#41 your joke sucked balls

SCHADENFREUDE - Look it up, bitches

If I was in America, I'd totally audition for this show. Just because I would love to tell her to her face what a low-class, disgusting waste of oxygen she is.

Oh, man, that would be good. And I'd punch her in the face. That's just good TV.

I'd estimate that around 97.5% of the contestants wanted to do that. The other contestant was just there for the food.

This thread was closed after comment #5. Hilarious.

Oh this makes me happy. Very , very happy. Score one for the good guys

I dunno, I'd be her friend if she offered thrice daily blowjobs. I mean, it's better than jerking off.

haha i would totally be her friend

Going as well as her search for a Podiatrist I'm sure...

With all the cash in the world why does this bitch continue to get uglier and uglier in every new picture? And why does she dress like an old bat? And why does she feel the need to impose herself on us poor Americans? Cant she move her fuckin gay "reality" shit show to Darfour instead and add a little interest to an otherwise complete and utter waste of time? The Simple Life at least showcased how hot and slutty she was at 21 but now she's like 50 and I'm sure I speak for everyone with a brain that we don't care about her or want to waste what precious little time we have here on earth ogling her cathy hilton like corpse or her phony voice and staged actions, wonky eye she tries to hide and fails greatly with her phony hair, her penis nose, her annoying and contrived smile, her "Im better than all you losers, see?" attitude, her batwang like body (batwang=gender post-op) sored up and ooozing vag, she's making such a fool of herself (and her family, but there already fools) why cant she just go away and leave us alone already? We no your rich herpe girl, why the need to constantly flaunt your flat pancake ass in our face constantly?

what a shocker. (note the sarcasm)

So i was picked to have an audition in nyc with casting directors...i attendedd it yesterday. after being asked a tons of numerous questions i realized this show is going to be such a joke. they are lookin for a bunch of flamboyant people...im talkin trannys and outrageously gay men. they told me to act and play a role. i thought this was reality ppl why am i playing a role?

She is cute and sexy. She is also my favorite. I saw her profile on "SeekingRich.com" last week. It is said she is dating a young billionaire on that site now.

it was closed auditions dumbasses

it wasn't closed auditions.

it's just people are sick of her.

why is she still being shoved down our throats? she has ZERO talent.

besides, kim kardashian is the new "famous for being famous" socialite.
and at least she's hot and pretty likeable.

i mean, even nicole has matured and stepped out the limelight to live her own life.
and she was always much more entertaining and interesting than paris.
so, please grow up and stop trying to cling onto your "fame".
because you never had a valid reason for being famous & we're over you.
thanks.

i like to be ur fren always hilton....this is me ukie

Paris Hilton is to be arrested on multiple felony counts including the stalking of Brandon M. Witte age 32 of Arlington, TX and for causing the "breakdown" of Britney Spears in January while accosting her with electronic devices and blackmailing her with a home porn of Spears while threatening to sell it for fifty million dollars if Spears went to the police. Witte has the entire story on his MySpace profile.

SHE DOES NOT HAVE A LAZY EYE ANYMORE!

my pet rock is smarter than what she is

paris u r so full of shit...look at the people that are trying to compete for your friendship...not one of them is worthy...oh yeah for you maybe.lol...how can your boyfriend even sit by you as you treat this people like animals or should i say pets...better not go back to jail because i'm sure that everyone in jail must know by your words that you consider them low life's by how you treat these people...you might be rich but you must be lonely. dirt is what u really are!!! no wonder your grandfather is so ashamed of you. i like how your sister distance herself from you...she has more class than you will ever have loser!!!

paris u r so full of shit...look at the people that are trying to compete for your friendship...not one of them is worthy...oh yeah for you maybe.lol...how can your boyfriend even sit by you as you treat this people like animals or should i say pets...better not go back to jail because i'm sure that everyone in jail must know by your words that you consider them low life's by how you treat these people...you might be rich but you must be lonely. dirt is what u really are!!! no wonder your grandfather is so ashamed of you. i like how your sister distance herself from you...she has more class than you will ever have loser!!!

check out her nose....I could carve a damn ham with that

All of you are just jelous of Paris. Because 99% of you will never have what She has. Which is a beautiful heart, Hott body, A successful career, A loving family, And now a BFF. Grow up people and let Paris live her life. Why juge her when you JUST DON'T KNOW!!!!!!!! People like you make this world full of hate. LOSERSSS!!!!!!!!!

Shes just done a uk version and it was the most painfull experience of my life.. watching 12 contestsnts spend weeks on end licking her bum so clean that you could eat your dinner from it!!
shes a sad snappy tool who treats these contestants like there one of her pet dogs and they seem to come back for more...and all say there doing it cause they love her....hmmm more like they want a slice of her fortune!!
lets face it if she was poor she would be dateless and prob working in a fish and chip shop....dirty scrubber and wouldnt have one friend at all!!
anyway america please dont ever send her here to the uk again or we will dry bum her to death on her arrival