Apr 1 2008Mr. T should be in The Bible
This post is not an April Fool's Joke. Apparently Mr. T once brought a boy out of a coma. I, for one, never doubted T's ability to make Death piss its pants. For you unbelievers out there, Mr. T shared his story in the latest issue of Empire. I present to you the Parable of T via WENN:
The poorly kid fell unconscious in Detroit, Michigan in the mid-1980s - and the only physical movement he made was in response to hearing Mr. T's name. And when the mohawked star was in town, he stopped by the hospital to visit the ill boy - with miraculous results. He tells Empire magazine, "His family put toys around him and one of them was a Mr. T doll. And whenever my name came up, the boy moved his arm. Somebody told the doctors I was in town, so they called me down there. I closed the curtains and prayed. Then, as I was walking down the hall, the kid suddenly came out of the coma and hollered out.
"That was my supernatural moment."
Thanks to Andy who has agreed to single-handedly help me fund the First Holy Church of Pitying Fools. I'll need that check by tomorrow or I'll have to drive a black GMC van into your house. Thus sayeth the T, Amen.
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Reader Comments
1. jesse - April 1, 2008 11:54 AM
FIRTS!!!
2. FRIST!!! - April 1, 2008 11:57 AM
"Then, as I was walking down the hall, the kid suddenly came out of the coma and hollered out 'THROW THAT FUCKING N I G G E R OUT OF MY HOSPITAL!'"
3. Trover - April 1, 2008 12:01 PM
Let me guess, the kid was a boy Rocky Balboa?
4. veggi - April 1, 2008 12:03 PM
Now, The A Team freakin ruled.... but look what The T did here..
http://youtube.com/watch?v=7_rBidCkJxo
It will leave you speachless..
5. veggi - April 1, 2008 12:03 PM
#2 - LMAO!!! No shit, I bet the smell alone is what did it.
6. janex - April 1, 2008 12:07 PM
Worthless racist trolls. Go fucking die.
7. veggi - April 1, 2008 12:11 PM
2 and 5. Eat shit ya fucking fuckface..
8. jackson - April 1, 2008 12:16 PM
"veggi" stfu and get your racist ass off this page
9. J@cko - April 1, 2008 12:18 PM
Mr.T rocks!
10. sevenandaswitchblade - April 1, 2008 12:19 PM
Pic # 3
Mr. T's inner monologue:
"KeepittogetherKeepittogetherKeepittogether...Damn, sorry colon, but my prediction? Pain."
11. woodhorse - April 1, 2008 12:22 PM
Mr. T is for real. He used to be a bodyguard for Muhammed Ali. Muhammed Ali had a full-return punch of 1/10 of a second. That is extremely real.
12. dave31 - April 1, 2008 12:23 PM
@6. janex
Ignore them. Theres only one thing worse than a troll, and thats a racist troll. They thrive on attention, and racism is a tool of the ignorant.
13. janex - April 1, 2008 12:27 PM
#12 - who the fuck are you to tell me what to do? Slavery ended a long time ago, cracker.
14. sportsdvl - April 1, 2008 12:38 PM
Don't be talkin' no racist smack or Mr. T will come kick your ass!
oh, #1 - loser!
15. janex - April 1, 2008 12:39 PM
@13 - Like I said, die troll. Damn pussy.
16. Boing! - April 1, 2008 12:45 PM
C'mon now, #2, you know the kid yelled, MY BIKE!
17. Auntie Kryst - April 1, 2008 12:46 PM
Did BA, Hannibal, Face and Murdock go get some payback from the South American Drug/Warlord that put that kid in the coma??
18. nipolian - April 1, 2008 12:49 PM
I think it was the drug that they had to use on BA to get him to fly that put the kid in a coma.
19. janex's boyfriend - April 1, 2008 12:53 PM
I'm ssssssso glad he lovesssss to ssssssay "damn pussy"! Me too!
20. Vince Lombardi - April 1, 2008 1:16 PM
Auntie, I thought it was BA, Hannibal, Starbuck, and Murdoch.... I always wondered why the A-Team didn't use that really cool, heavily armed Colonial Viper to blow up the roads right next to the bad guys and make their jeeps flip over. Or why Adama never sent BA in to "pity the cylons."
21. Fred "The Ogre" Palowakski - April 1, 2008 1:26 PM
NERDS!!!
22. nipolian - April 1, 2008 1:28 PM
#20 - Wait.....I'm confused......I thought Commander Adama was Hoss' and Little Joe's dad.
23. Famous Plastic - April 1, 2008 1:29 PM
I couldn't agree more. Mr. T would totally win against Jesus in a cage fight....
24. nipolian - April 1, 2008 1:43 PM
#23 - Not if Jesus used the force against Mr. T.
25. Peas and Nuts! - April 1, 2008 2:14 PM
i love this! mr. T is amazing! such an icon. did his advice show get cancelled?
26. sam - April 1, 2008 2:17 PM
Mr. T's Be Somebody...Or Be Somebody's Fool CHANGED MY LIFE.
27. Igottabemeeee - April 1, 2008 2:17 PM
To the fools who what have been pitied: Mr. T Rules. The End. (teehee)
28. The Laughing God - April 1, 2008 2:39 PM
@23 LOL "the force"
This is news worthy. Pic 3 looks like he is about to crap his pants or throwing a fit.
29. Auntie Kryst - April 1, 2008 2:59 PM
@20 & 22 No pity for the cylons. Eyebeam going all left to right, too much jibba jabba.. Anyway, Adama's son got back from Korea and ol' Trap went on to be a lead surgeon at San Fran. Memorial.
30. Ash - April 1, 2008 3:11 PM
can we focus on the fact that Mr. T should be in the white house? screw a church, let's make Mr. T beat the jibba jabba right out of hillary, obama and whatever idiot republicans are voting in this year! I think his running mate should be Chuck Norris... who's in?
31. Pee Wee Herman - April 1, 2008 3:11 PM
I pity the poor fool who don't eat my cereal.
32. Italian Stallion - April 1, 2008 3:17 PM
I thought Red Foxx was dead and all this time he was in the gym.........
33. what's it to you? - April 1, 2008 8:36 PM
God bless Mr. T. That man is a national treasure.
34. Mr. T Bloody Mary Mix - April 2, 2008 1:30 AM
#34 Hell yeah I saw good too. Mr. T has a plural crush on hot chicks. Yo Thunderlips, you is going through the big D, get some of this shit.
35. ew - April 2, 2008 9:36 AM
his facial hair looks like pubes!!!!!!!!
36. Erica. - April 2, 2008 1:38 PM
Mr. T's facial hair does look like pubes..but he is amazing. 'Nuff said.
37. Grunion - April 2, 2008 1:43 PM
"Mister T's Commandments" is the greatest music video ever made. I still know the words by heart. Unfortunetly I didn't listed cause I still do a shitload of drugs.
Believe it 'cause every word is true....
38. thatgirl - April 4, 2008 1:58 PM
whats up with the dumb red neck racism going on? i can't believe it.. its only the beginning of the 21st century though. it will die out soon, what a place to choose to express it. what a loser.
anyways, Mr T seemed cool but i was too young to really remember
39. Guffaws Galore - April 6, 2008 6:10 PM
OMG! I'm howling with laughter! I can't believe someone actually posted about Mr. T. You rock!!!!