Mar 10 2008Rebecca Loos hopes these will jog your memory

FIRST BITCHES

taking topless pics for a tabloid? This girl is all kinds of classy.

FIRST!!@#E#

FIRST!!@#E#

Nah, no butt shots, the "guys" here will hate this.

Suck-Suck-Suck-Suck-Dibble-Dibble-Dibble-Dibble-INSERT-INSERT!

Ejaculate-Ejaculate.

I just got fired. Fuck you.

#5 -- Double negative.

OK so she is famous for screwing a famous married man. Now keep on posting her picture and making her a infamous celebrity.

@8 Do you really expect trolls to be smart??

She has a nice rack..

uhm... she's not his personal assistant dumb-ass.
she's a dutch model.

(not that she's that beautiful though)

My fellow Americans, let me be perfectly clear. I would tap that.

My peach cobbler was so nice on Saturday. See the trick is to, make sure the peach is firm, but not too firm, soft, but not too soft, almost pre-rot, pre, not rot. Then to dice them up and mix it all together with my "special ingredients list". Shh! I am not telling you! Martha has been after that recipe for years! The glower on her face when she looked over at her husband Mathew and saw his face awash with pleasure on his first bite is the only thing that give me pleasure my old years. Mercy me! Mercy me! Oh, ho, ho...no, no I think I will cut back on the amount of marijuana in it next time.

These aren't new photos...well the one with the guy isn't . the guy is a NZ rugby player that she was with about a year ago and she got snapped topless with him on holiday.

BUTTERFACE

#15

Yummy!

#15

It can be a challenge to be a professional and a pot head at night and not gain weight. So what I do is eat a sensible breakfast and lunch and eat a salad for dinner with low cal dressing or lemon. And then after I get stoned and have the munchies; I eat Dreyers 1/2 the fat and 1/3 less calories for dessert. I have several serving since it is lower in fat and calories. And also I exercise once or twice a week too or sex can replace exercising as long as you get multiple orgasms and do it for at least 20 minutes.

what the hell does "butterface" mean?!?!

@17 You must be a homo. I still have not seen her face.

What kind of idiot allows a more attractive woman than themselves to be their Hubby's personal assistant? Oh ya hideous anorexic shopaholic useless housewives who are just glutton for punishment or self destructively stupid. Seems there are many such idiots, hence the constant nanny and secretary affairs. But I guess when you marry a useless bitch for her looks and youth alone that's how things always go... Looks go, youth goes and then the rich man's trophy skank position re-opens as does the newbie's ho hole.

I guess for Poshy the stick spice it's pretty hard though because every woman is more attractive than Posh, except the morbidly obese. Wait that's wrong, many morbidly obese people are much hotter than Posh, like that lobster eating thing that Dane Cook screwed in Good Luck Chuck. Poor ugly anorexic materialistic bitch spice, even most gay men are more attractive than her so she has to watch her hubby non stop. The skank probably sleeps with one eye open and I don't mean her brown eye (though I hear the anorexics always have bowl problems so maybe she does).

The lesson is to never marry someone better looking than you. Luckily for some of us (*points repeatedly to self with thumbs*) there is no such thing. But for the rest of you don't pull a Jennifer Anniston, it never ends well.

Anyhosen, this bitch is ugly in the face, the overall bod is meh but, yeah that boobs are impressive. I wonder if they're fake for such bigguns they aren't too saggy. But lots of chicks have largish boobs and then throw some silly just to keep them perky and of course make them bigger. But, regardless of the tatas the girl really is not good looking enough to be acting the way she does, so I predict that because she is not that hot and obviously is a self absorbed attention whore she will likely have a miserable life. She just doesn't have the goods to supply the attention she craves. It's a called " T15MFS: Terminal 15 Minutes Fame Syndrome" or " PHS: Paris Hilton Syndrome" not to be confused with Paris Hilton Disease which is a raging mutated combo of every STD in existence) although inexplicably Paris has been able to fight it every step of the way. Which one? Well, both actually.

@20 Everything looks good butt her face.

This broad has beautiful tits.

@ #20

"Butterface" = "but her face"

Are they real? If not,can someone get me the name of her surgeon??

23, 24, thanks.

Her face isn't THAT bad. I do hate butterfaces though. Girls with pretty faces but who are like kind of chubby can work on their bodies. But girls who have ugly faces, hmph. They may have hot bods, but if you try to fix your face it usually turns out horrible and you're even more ugly than before. Just making a point.

Becks can have any woman he wants, but he's stuck with that pencil shaped has been of a Spice Girl. Poor guy. Just goes to show you that Clooney and Tarantino have the right idea: When you're famous, don't get married. There's always another busload of women coming around the bend.

"...JOG your memory"
for some reason i thought that said 'jugs'. i can't imagine why i thought that.

Nice rack! I'd love to give her a pearl necklace or two. Then she could blow me to complete the fantasy! Yummy tits!

Ahhh....dinner, the perfect break between work and drunk..

I took one look and first thing that came to my mind is "fake!!!" Although, to be fair, they are rather pleasant-looking funbags.

I took one look and first thing that came to my mind was "fake!!!" Although, to be fair, they are rather pleasant-looking funbags.

@32 I think they are real. They just don't have that stand at attention look to them. But I guess there is only one way to find out.

They aren't real but they were fairly big to begin with. So I just shoved some old cheese in there to keep the perkilicious. Cheese never really goes bad it just goes old (like Catherine Zeta Jones) so this procedure works pretty well but don't get too close, she smells fucking retched.

Just tell your local surgeon/butcher you want cheese tits and he'll hook you up. It can also be done with hamburger meat but those buger implanted heffers always seem to go crazy after that one.

@32 Sorry Debagger, I just read on Wikipedia that she did have her breasts enlarged from 34C to 34D.

No way those tennis-ball boobs are real. But at least you can tell she hasn't had any work done on her face. Ouch.

Unfortunately without ass pics this post is a complete bust (pun intended).

I would like to confirm that she is the ultimate skank on the side (from the neck down) but for some reason the photographer left out her ass - how do you shoot a skank without an obligatory ass shot? Horrible judgment imo.

Oh please she was as flat as a pancake until she got enough exposure and money to afford a tit job. She's famous here in England for wanking a pig on a farm, she is PURE lowdown trash, she makes Vic Beckham look like an aristrocrat.

@35 - Bullshit she was as flat as a fried egg til she got fake sacs inserted in to her sliced open breasts.

OMG. I just saw more pic on a celeb site called ‘Searching Millionaire DOT com’.she is so hot.

Ok, if Beckham fucked her... he would do me :)

@42 I would do you!! I love red heads:)

Ok so...can someone please tell this fat ugly chick to cover up her freaky ass nipples please?

Thanks.

#40. Wrong idiot. Jimbo is correct on this one. look at her ass ugly face and the rest of her body. of course god gave her boobs she has little else going for her.

This pic is pre implants:
http://www.easycelebritys.com/r/rebecca_loos_01/pics/rebecca_loos_11.jpg

This pic is post implants:
http://www.easycelebritys.com/r/rebecca_loos_01/pics/rebecca_loos_18.jpg

those are implants

#38. Here ya go, ass shots of the skank.

http://www.celebskin.net/freecma/rebecca-loos/starcelebs.html

Flat and shapeless. that's why the photog didn't snap it, same reason I don't take pictures of my walls.

#42

Look Beckham pulled a Clinton. His cheating has nothing to do with wanting a particular woman. It's about wanting any woman other than your spouse. These types cheat on opportunity. The "assistant" wasn't hot but she was always around, always willing and let's face it, a penis will go into any vagina as long as it's not attached to a completely hostile monster. I'm sure Victoria is keeping a much tighter leash on him now. No chance of this going down again on her watch.

46th.
She's a foxy fox and would get both barrels of baby-gravy from me right across the eyes.
But, she did jerk of a pig on national telly so maybe not for your if you live on a farm.

Oh bugger.

she's a real one pose wonder. nice repertoire, honey. get over your cooch tattoo already, its really not that interesting.

Well, at least she has nice nipples . . .

She was said to have a personal account on 'BillionaireCupid.co m' club with her hot pictures and blogs there. The site is getting hotter and hotter, cuz quite a few millionaires and celebrities tend to go there.

I'd cut her head off and jam my hate log down her throbbing esophagus. I would then anal fist her corpse and eat the remains.

#49,
Does that mean you have 2 penises? Odd. You should work in a carnival. My uncle had 5 penises. His pants fit like a glove.

Fuck, I'm starting to repeat jokes I made from the first time I arrived at this place.

@47 - good work and your point is well taken.

I guess I don't get why these world class whore magnets would "allegedly" sport fuck the ugly when actual hot women would line up in droves to drop their panties for them.

Those are obviously implants. She should have done her face though.

Her= whore. Beckham never fucked her.

Someday, if I'm a good girl, I'll get me some Becks though.

I want me some David Beckham. He's hot as hell.
She's a fake ass chick. He likes Victoria, who looks like a nasty doll, so he must have horrible taste. I still want me some Becks though.

Eh. Her tits are awesome, but blah on the face

she reminds me of johanna from the real world on mtv. sick

What a dogface. Woof.

But that's why doggystyle was invented. Hold onto those splendid funbags and ride that butterfaced bitch from behind until kingdom come.

The implants were a good start. Now she needs to take it further. I'd like to take her to the Build-A-Bitch workshop and make a few modifications.

#58 well your name must be pot cause you just tried to call the kettle black. becks is a married man and will stay that way. your insisting you'll "get some" of him, a married man, makes you a whore. lucky you, i just happen to love whores. can i get your #? no spouse, no guilt !

@22. Vicky never needs to worry. She has a penis!

EWW, she has SLOPPY TITS, I'm a titty girl but I'm not all about these ones! Give me some SCARLET JO JO TITTIES!!!!!!!

#65 - God did not intend for you to be sexually attracted to another girl, so we don't care what you think of this woman's breasts.

Because she's so conceited about her tits, I'd ignore them completely and fuck her in the ass. But because her ass is so flat and shapeless, I'd pull out and make her taste it.

Okay....what the FUCK happened to the REAL Superficial writer???? Whoever has been writing for the past week or so is NOT the same person as before, and absolutely sucks. He/She tries to copy the old Superficial Writer's style and fails miserably every time. The resulting posts end up reading like parodies. BRING BACK THE ORIGINAL SUPERFICIAL WRITER!!! The new one is a fraud and I no longer have any reason to visit this site....the funnyness was the only thing I visited for.

#66 - Haha... GREAT point!

Hmm, at least they're real. I'll give her +1 for that. How I hate fake tittied bitches.

You can see it, can't you? She's kind of like the anti-Posh. Nice and cushy, lots to grab onto, regular chick hair, seems to smile a lot. Very different from the Tangerine colored swizzle stick.

Why....why has no one mentioned the cellulite-iness that is her thighs (fourth pic)? Where's the eye bleach?!

exciting photo. i also saw her photo put on the site called WealthyDater.com, really! is she want to find a rich man?

I mean duh
Victoria can look like a robot a bit or an alien, i think she's still sexier than this girl. She only got a big breast and that's it...
With, you have the lust, the reputation, the love, and she's kind of beautiful!
AND SHE WAS A SPICE GIRLS!!!
Spice girls = Sexy and cool!
David did the worst thing in his life when he got a mistress.
I know it's more exciting than masturbation, but seriously, he was a married man!

and....eee.....BRITNEY IS THE BEST :D

Oh, and by the way - Yes. It is 12:19, I am here in my apt. alone and I am on this site.

I'm old, I'm high, I'm single and desperate and I'll never have kids because no one wants to fuck me. There, you happy? For fuckssake man, it's whatever you want to call it.

Now that we're past that...
Does this chick actually have the last name Loose? Who the fuck is she? Ah well, no reason necessary for showing tits, I suppose.

i guess the rumors are true there he is in the first pic

i guess the rumors are true there he is in the first pic

@35 - yeah asshole way to post a link that doesn't come up! Wooooo Hooooo you really PROVED your point there PIGSHIT FUCKBRAIN - pathetic - most likely a man!

Nice rack...I'd definitely pummel it.

Hey, Frist, you better watch out!

Il tell you that it's no coincidence between Mars being a planet and the Egyptians having intercourse -- excuse me: Arabs; Demascus; intergalactic alien hybrid space-sailors. Ya' know, All that first-rate science stuff.

Genesis: the begining. Yeah, think about that.

I am still awake. My goddamn 220 volt vibrator short circuited last night (man I was wet - no not naturally, a woman my age uses lots of lube and in my case I use sour cream because I eat it afterwards)! I singed what little remaining gray pubes I had. Now the first thing you see between my dimpled chafing thighs is a monstous bald gray patchy clit. Damn I am never gonna get laid now.
I am so lonely that once in a whore, especially during holiday seasons like christmas, I will stuff my shirts with padding just to simulate pregnancy so I look like I have a husband.and a family on the way! Love! Although I know that if someone ever knocked my up they would never stay and I would be a single Mom.
I have a zoo of pets, a few I hump. I gerbil, bathe with my rabbit, of course I have a few dogs (my favorite position AND theirs!), ant farms to help clean my kitchen counters and do you count yeast as pets?

Wow! He doesn't like his women good looking, does he? And yes, they're fake. Implants should only fool 14 year old virgins, so it's pretty sad that people are actually asking the question.

Thanks, #81. Finally. REAL humor. I guffawed. Much-needed & appreciated.

GET A NEW POST UP, FOR BUTTAFUCO'S SAKE...

Yours untruly,
F.

THAT IS NOT DAVID BECKHAM -- he has tatoos all up his RIGHT arm. This biatch's got the WRONG GUY??

She apparently smiled too much for Beckham... he prefers his bitches to have that, "who the hell stuck this hot pepper up my ass?" look.

Nothing like some implants early in the morning.

would someone please revoke this limey skank's 15 Minutes Of Fame Card post haste. thanks.

#48

....damn it!

What s with Beckham banging ugly chicks? That have ugly implants! Actually hers don't look to bad compared to Mrs Beckham.

The guy in the first photo is Matthew Ridge - ex Rugby League player and tv 'celebrity' here in NZ. LooMat as they were dubbed were all the big news for a while, mile high club and all that, but she took off back overseas for another reality show and that was the end of that!

good lockin send potos

does anyone thinks she looks asian??? and are u sure they are fake tits?

you stupid idiot hes married and has 3 KIDS!!!!!!!

you stupid idiot hes married and has 3 KIDS!!!!!!!