Mar 25 2008Hogan Knows Best - on how to get sued
The lawsuit everyone knew was coming was filed yesterday. The Hogans are being sued by the family of John Graziano the young Marine who remains in a coma after being injured in a car crash. John was riding in the the Toyota Supra that Nick Hogan managed to turn into a crushed banana with the help of a tree. And, also, oh I dunno, some booze. The St. Petersburg Times reports:
The suit will seek damages in the millions, said attorney George Tragos, but the exact amount is not known because it remains unclear how expensive Graziano's care will be. Tragos said the former Marine's medical bills already exceed $1 million.
Just how injured is John Graziano? Let's say it's somewhere between super fucked up and Jesus Christ, they took part of your brain!:
Lawyers today said that a portion of Graziano's frontal lobe had to be removed because of the crash. He is in a "semi-conscious" state and responds to certain stimuli like heat and touch, lawyers said.
The suit is definitely pointing out well-known facts that Linda Hogan encouraged her son Nick's reckless driving. And that Hulk also owned the other car that Nick was racing with before he crashed. The driver of that car is also named in the suit. Coincidentally, lawyers also filed a motion that Brooke Hogan should wash my car in a bikini. Or at least they will if they know what's good for them. *waves donut threateningly* That's right, son, jelly: The deadliest of the donu - wait, my bad. It's only peanut butter. Goddammit...
RELATED STORIES
Reader Comments
1. josh - March 25, 2008 9:57 AM
First
2. dode - March 25, 2008 10:06 AM
damn the superficial dude lost it. his comments are no longer hilarious. they're funny but not that funny and they lack the old punch.
OLD SUPERFICIAL, COME BACK.
3. dode - March 25, 2008 10:06 AM
damn the superficial dude lost it. his comments are no longer hilarious. they're funny but not that funny and they lack the old punch.
OLD SUPERFICIAL, COME BACK.
4. FagHag - March 25, 2008 10:06 AM
Hulk is saying "I fuck that twice a day"
Daddys shouldn't fuck their daughters.
But, on the other hand, Mothers should take care of their sons.
5. OutRunner1 - March 25, 2008 10:08 AM
The post is not that funny for you because the biggest joke is Brooke's man-face. Nothing can follow that act.
6. Shit Face - March 25, 2008 10:09 AM
Suck my engorged corn hole.
7. bilbo boggins - March 25, 2008 10:11 AM
@Josh
Im sorry, but surfing the net while sitting in your own stinking crusty underwear, while blabbing 'FIRST' on this site, does not make you any more of a man.
now, go wash that underwear before your mother smells it.
8. sherry - March 25, 2008 10:11 AM
i would be tuff shit your kid was drunk in a car he took the risk didnt his mama teach him that.
9. FRIST!!! - March 25, 2008 10:15 AM
Seems like a perfectly just punishment for torturing and killing innocent civilians in Iraq.
10. Auntie Kryst - March 25, 2008 10:17 AM
@8 Sherry, I hope you're not planning to drive anywhere for a couple more hours. Pour yourself some coffee.
11. tight lipped smiler - March 25, 2008 10:31 AM
What do you expect from a son raised by a mother who looks sluttier than the daughter?
12. zuzuspetals - March 25, 2008 10:52 AM
This family represents everything that is wrong with the U.S.
Can we just send them to Iraq and bring all the troops home?
I think Cheney and Bush should agree that the sacrifice would be worth it.
And then maybe the rest of the country could promise:
- Not to drive recklessly and waste oil and human lives
- Not to worship celebrities who didn't deserve five minutes of air time in the first place
- Not to create or watch any more reality TV shows because let's face it, we're just not that interesting that we should be recording everything we do
- Not to ever, ever, ever use tanning products that turn the skin orange
I might scream if I have to see one more bleached-blonde person with a fake orange tan. I think all of those mutants should be sent to the middle of the desert somewhere WITH NO CAMERAS to record them. Christina Aguilera will be their queen. We need to get them at the nest, people!
13. tranny knows best - March 25, 2008 10:56 AM
I will pack a handful of hotdogs into my bikini and wash your car if you are into that.
14. FagHag - March 25, 2008 10:58 AM
Sounds like a lot of fun, tranny................
We need to talk. Please..............
15. butt action jackson - March 25, 2008 10:59 AM
there are less convincing trannies...
http://thesuperficial.com/2008/03/fergie_crystal_meth_hilarity_a.php
16. Jesus Tap Dancing Christ - March 25, 2008 11:40 AM
The Hulkster must be so proud of his sons. Especially the cross dresser.
17. Codzilla - March 25, 2008 11:43 AM
So first our dear Superficial Writer deemed a greasy, meth-faced Britney Spears as "curiously doable." And now he thinks Brooke Hogan in a bikini is a good thing? What the hell is happening inside your head, man? Whatever it is, I would suggest your coworkers run for their lives. NOW.
18. Good Bye - March 25, 2008 11:54 AM
I'm bored and this site is boring today.
P.S. The mom looks like a man in drag.
19. fearsarewishes - March 25, 2008 11:56 AM
#8
Text message jargon is the new Ebonics.
BTW sherry, u r 1 stoopid cunt.
Thank you.
20. bootlips - March 25, 2008 12:22 PM
Wiggas are like the plague.
21. KillMONTAG - March 25, 2008 1:55 PM
What is with the fingers? does he think he's Eminem or some other waaaaaay coooooool black guy (tongue in cheek anyone who pulls the finger shit is a fucking nancy boy asswipe)
22. rusty - March 25, 2008 2:16 PM
Everyone knows orange, gargantuan, bleach blond trannies are best at washing cars.
23. Dim Bulb For Jesus - March 25, 2008 3:14 PM
Why is everyone Orange ?
The Bollea Effect ?
Hmmm ..... Maybe it's just the dim lightng
Amen Brother !!!!
24. brian t - March 25, 2008 5:24 PM
Brooke Hogan should wash your car in a bikini? I don't know if I would want to see your car in a bikini...
25. Moobs - March 25, 2008 6:21 PM
Hulk is saying: "one in the pink, one in the stink"
On a side note tho, i sort of feel bad for the hulkster.... I guess because he reminds me a bit of my step dad who is an alright guy, macho type, not all that "smart" but a pretty good heart for a dad.
His son is typical "dumbass" material so he should have probably known better than to let him drive fast cars. Driving is NO JOKE.
26. caleb - March 25, 2008 10:58 PM
This lawsuit would never happen if we had national healthcare.
27. sharpeidude - March 26, 2008 3:34 AM
Hulk says; "I'm gonna clip the bitch before she clips my bank account!"