Feb 14 2008Raekwon knows how to romance

FIRST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

87th bitches!

FIRST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh please tell me he's been cast as the next "Bachelor"

word up yo, incarcerated scarfaces

Bring da motherfuckin ruckus

PS: This story is fucking gross..

Hi Gals, I've been picked as this year's chairwoman for our cul-de-sac's annual Alley Rally. Our theme this year is Pink Skin & Green Lawns. I want this year to be the best yet, so I'm starting early. I'm taking volunteers for sub-committee chairs for music, food, kids’ games and snacks. My hubby has already asked to be in charge of the BBQ, and Sandy I hope we can all count on you to bring your neighborhood famous lemon bars!

it would be incredibly noisy and uncomfortable - especially considering his weight. What a idiot.

What a coincidence!

That fat slob could never have sex sitting up, unless he's got a 16'' cock to get past his gut

And here I thought he would spend the day smoking crack and shooting people. My bad.

Wu Tang is for the children

Just another classy guy, right knee grow?

SAD SAD SAD

Better be a whole squadron of CH-53's to lift his black ass. Sort of like how they lifted King Kong. See how I worked that King Kong / large black ape on this oversized porch moneky! Anyone, Anyone?

When asked what he planned to do after the helicopter ride, his answers were just a series of clicks and pops and then he leapt from the stage and brachiated along the scaffolding.
Yeah. You know what I'm saying.

By "helicopter" I think he means his porch with the fan swithed on.
By "sex" he means eating chicken.

Happy MutherF@ckN V Day

By "helicopter" I think he means his porch with the fan switched on.
By "sex" he means eating chicken.

Happy MutherF@ckN V Day

Brilliant stuff, The White Urkle, just sheer brilliance!

“This SkyCam 7 Traffic report is brought to you by St. Ides Malt Liqour. ‘When you absomuthfuckinglutely want yo shit fucked up, St. Ides.’

Traffic is moving ackwardly southbound over the Twin Mounds Parkway. Hazmat crews are licking up waste on the I 8 spur. Beware of a bad accident on I 69. A large semi is jack knifed facing a Volvo tying up tying up both north and southbound traffic. A small milktruck spilt its contents when it prematurely entered traffic along Schame Drive. Motorcyclists are encouraged to manually get off at the nearest exit."

I don't know if maintaining altitude would be that much of a problem. Guys don't move around that much when they masturbate, do they?

Raekwon?

Oh, you mean the 'chef' -- yeah, boyee! That niggra bad-as mugh-fucker, yo'.

The chef drives his Mercedes to the zoo, where he is to rendezvous with his newest partner. Rae-Rae quietly slips in to the encloser, enjoys a little bamboo, then proceeds to mount his beautiful, sensuous, mountain gorilla girlfriend -- named simply, 'Tah-bee-tah' (Graceful).

Raekwon then shits in to the palm of his hand and smears it all over the glass; right in the face of a janitor that has been watching in horror.

Happy Valentines honey! Let me fuck you in a helicopter...

What? The? Fuck?

and hes having sex with me...yeah i know your jealous bitches!!

Who said Chivalry is dead?

After you wash his extra large clothes and empty the extra large cooking pots of used Crisco for his Jethro Bodine Lunch, he will not bruise you from behind while you do the ironing like he usually does but instead - because it is Valentines Day - he will drag you up in a helicopter flown by a heavily paid off psychopath pilot so he can squash the air out of your lungs doing sex to you while you are draped over half the console because there isn't room for anyone but him in the back cabin. Be sure to have on your shiniest hooker clothes because he is likely to put on a new pair of extra large basketball shorts for the occasion.

Wu Tang bitches

I didn't realize the whole Wu Tang Clan was just one guy. That sumbitch is huge.

Gee, I hope he ejaculates out the window. That'll show us all what romance is... and conjunctivitis....and HSV1.

When did he get to be such a fatass?

one word...classy

Having sex in a helicopter is fine. Just don't let the mace get in the pilot's eyes....

.

Someone call the zoo. An ape must've gotten out.

FAT FUCK - nuff said.

JoBOO's a fuckin idiot. Nuff said.

looks like Raekwon knows how to Roid as well.

Shame on the writer of this article for starting this whole Raekwon is a fat ass bullshit. What a low meaningless blow to pick on someones weight, especially since he's not THAT FAT! Yes, he could probably loose a good amount but who cares? I could stand to lose some weight too!

This guy is a legend, him and the rest of the Wu Tang Clan made a billion dollars making some of the best and most influential rap records in history.
For some people, his music brings back fond memories of high school and college radio stations in the early 90's. There is no reason why his weight should be an issue here. It's just pointless disrespect.

Besides, I thought Raekwon was an American citizen. Who are you to take away his freedom of choosing exactly how big he wants to be?

Anyways, I'm sure my comments are pointless anyways. It's quite obvious a lot of these stupid comments about apes, chicken eating, crack smoking, and shooting people are simply racist in nature.

P.S. The jokes on everyone else, because Raekwon is fucking someone in a helicopter right now.

word lamont. word.

he is cool. don't you know he has posted his personal ad to a celebrities dating site for several months. That site called "Searching Millionaire.com". I just visited his profile page yesterday.

Fat. Ugly. Black. = Loser. Loser. Criminal.

And you know that'll be Mushmouth gettin ass-nabbed by Fat Albert in the chopper, since no authority figures will comprehend his homo rape tale. Weird Harold will pilot.

Bring da mother, bring da motherfuckin ruckus

"Anyways, I'm sure my comments are pointless anyways. It's quite obvious a lot of these stupid comments about apes, chicken eating, crack smoking, and shooting people are simply racist in nature."

Racist? Do you think?

All I know for sure is that you use the word "anyways" like a 13 year old white girl and that rap has never influenced me to do anything except change the station.

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Lamont! #35! Lamont! Go get the truck, you got to take me and Grady to the store. Just get me away from your ugly ol' Aunt Ester. Later I want you to pick up the junkyard a little bit. Be a good boy now Lamont. Wait, I don't feel so good, oh no! I'm coming Elizabeth, this is the big one!

#35. No, Raekwon is not an American citizen -- The Chef's 'African American'.

This guy is a real poet:

Yo crushed grills, dollar bills, swiss suit on
Screw on drysell nigga with his loot on
Watch this, gun glock less, fiends scopin out my rock shit
Diamond on some H&R Block shit
Hear me, gets Larry and his sneakers are shot
Word to me Dunn, the uniform do mean a lot
I approach lit up cousin sit up matter of fact get up
What fuss on the bottom face slit up
Yeah where you from I'm from here
You know Brina and Javier, and Little Life doin thirty years
Analyzin this wise guy a look alike first prize guy
Lit up the thai said riiiight!
Emotionally playin him close like I'm suppossed to be
Somethin spoke to me, it was this little nigga pokin me
I heard sirens now turn around about to hit em
Son was po nine with the emblem
Grabbed my goose down the walkie-talkie
Foul I'm loose now shot went off knocked the juice down
It ricocheted and hit a GS now here comes EMS, Dunn was leanin
near a ZX
Next time shit's parental, God slap fire out yer mental
Jet in a boat with rims to mental

Lot of racists on here...

Anyways- Rae is that dude

Purple tape = classic

Re: 41 - I'd rather have typos and bad grammer in a website comment, then be racist.

Re: 43 - Your translation program crashed and spit out a bunch of junk instead of translating your comments into english

Re: 44 - I stand corrected: "The Chef's 'African American'."

LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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It's a shock to see that racists are still scared and ignorant. Try something new, please.