Nov 5 2007Christina Aguilera makes a shocking announcement
Christina Aguilera finally confirmed her pregnancy in the latest issue of Glamour. She will “enter into mommyhood” next year, according to People:
"I want to get it right," she is quoted as saying.
Describing the reaction of the father-to-be – Aguilera's husband, music executive Jordan Bratman, 30 – she says, "He's thrilled! He's just great."
Aguilera also says she finds Bratman (who, like her, hails from New York) "so supportive and amazing through everything. He came with me on the last leg of the tour and he was my support system. ... I gush. I'm a lucky girl."
I would’ve never guessed. For a while there I could only come up with one explanation why Christina Aguilera kept getting larger and shopping at baby boutique stores. I’m embarrassed to say it, but I thought she was eating babies. Hence the extra weight. The boutique items she purchased were, of course, part of an elaborate trap to lure the little ones in. I just assumed she learned that from her husband who employed similar techniques during his time roaming the Pacific Northwest. Man, I was way off. She’s just pregnant – with that dude’s child. On second thought I like my theory better. Less gross.


Reader Comments
1. veggi - November 5, 2007 3:29 PM
FIRST you smegma-chugging whores!
2. freakwad - November 5, 2007 3:29 PM
duhhhh
3. Shallo Val - November 5, 2007 3:29 PM
I know she's a natch blonde, but I cannot bee-leeve that she's still dyeing her hair.
4. veggi - November 5, 2007 3:30 PM
@1- gawd! You are one sick fucker. Now, go find your own name if you please.
I'm off to lunch fuckers! I'm gonna have a 2 beer sammmich.
5. Valerie hates talentless hacks - November 5, 2007 3:30 PM
Well done, veggi, well done. (claps hands and says you go boyeeeee)
6. freakwad - November 5, 2007 3:34 PM
wow, second post today where i got second. i just keep visiting this page right with Fish updates. heh.
VEGGI: I WILL PREVAIL
7. Looks like a heifer - November 5, 2007 3:36 PM
what kind of demon spawn is she having?
8. JM - November 5, 2007 3:37 PM
In the main pic, she looks like a troll doll. I just want to fluff her hair sup and see if it stands straight up. I know she's got those big ass troll eyes too. Why the fuck else would she wear those ginormous sunglasses?
PS - I'm no fashion expert, but when the fuck did the "phantom of the opera mask-thick", "I put my makeup on with a trowel", "It's not even foundation anymore, it's skin tone spackle" look come into style? That shit's so thick it could stop an arrow. NYPD called to find out if they could use her face for ballistic tests. You people smell what I'm steppin in here? That bitch is ugly.
9. raichu - November 5, 2007 3:38 PM
no shitttttt
10. English groans audibly - November 5, 2007 3:40 PM
"You people smell what I'm steppin in here? "
11. PunkA - November 5, 2007 3:42 PM
Let's hope her kid inherits her vocal talent. Otherwise, it will be a no talent UGLY little thing. Bratman is just one fugly dude. Christina must be one insecure chick for her to land with Bratman. Seriously, my ass has a better face than he does. And unbelievably, my ass has slightly less hair.
12. FRIST!!! - November 5, 2007 3:45 PM
#11 - and if I stuck my finger up your ass, what would it smell like? Just trying to complete the picture...
13. Veggi thinks she's so cool - November 5, 2007 3:50 PM
Each new picture has that "Veggi" claiming she's eating a "sammich", she found the word amusing and now we get it every time, this is so boring. Can't she eat a decent lunch sometimes ? You know like a piece of meat with vegetables, and a yoghurt ? Boy she must be fat with all that junk food eaten in front of a computer.
14. Italian Stallion - November 5, 2007 3:52 PM
I'm sure the baby will come out of her fine, but if it inherits the fathers nose, that bitch is in for a lot of hurting..............
15. FRIST!!! - November 5, 2007 3:53 PM
#12 What say we cut the chit chat A-hole!!!
16. sneelok - November 5, 2007 3:53 PM
Not that anyone cares, but Christina isn't from New York. She's from Pittsburgh. And she smells like hotdogs. True story.
17. Nevermind - November 5, 2007 3:56 PM
It surprises me that this girl, who happens to be considered a big star, is totally thrilled that her boyfriend cares enough about the baby to stick around her. Is being totally indifferent the new standard ? When the guy cares a bit, you have to consider yourself "a lucky girl" ? If he doesn't give a shit, it is just normal ? Wow.
18. FRIST!!! - November 5, 2007 3:58 PM
Oops - @15 I meant to type "#13" obviously...
19. she ugly - November 5, 2007 4:01 PM
17, have you seen her w/out makeup?? it explains a lot.
and her legs are pretty much parenthesis
20. jimmy - November 5, 2007 4:11 PM
I'm pretty sure she is from Pittsburgh
21. Beth - November 5, 2007 4:14 PM
It's so true, she's completely bowlegged. I read somewhere that's from crawling under fences as a kid. Anybody know if that's true? She IS hispanic, I know that much.
22. Billy Bones - November 5, 2007 4:14 PM
FIRST!!!!
23. somegirl - November 5, 2007 4:14 PM
Knee fat...gross.
24. soph - November 5, 2007 4:15 PM
i think this is the funniest post i've read on here.
25. FRIST!!! - November 5, 2007 4:17 PM
#18, obviously you need to get a fucking life.
26. legs - November 5, 2007 4:21 PM
21-
i think some people are just born bow-legged, but i also know that if children have a vitamin D deficiency they develope rickets and are bow-legged. i think it is a nasty deformity... i love great legs on a woman.
27. FRIST!!! - November 5, 2007 4:24 PM
#25, nice try, troll. Get your own name.
28. Ript1&0 - November 5, 2007 4:24 PM
Yeah, this is all boring me today..
Call me when Britney licks heroin off a hooker's asshole and then burns down her Malibu mansion, mm'kay?
29. jules - November 5, 2007 4:26 PM
she looks like a witch.
imo always has always will
.... and her legs are f-ed up.
30. veggi - November 5, 2007 4:29 PM
@28 - I can't help you with the second part, but let me check my cellphone pics for the first part...does it have to be Britney?
31. theShizaan - November 5, 2007 4:32 PM
Wow...for a minute there I thought she had announced that she would start wearing makup
32. theShizaan - November 5, 2007 4:32 PM
Wow...for a minute there I thought she had announced that she would start wearing makeup
33. Feckless - November 5, 2007 4:51 PM
Her husband almost got arrested for theft but they rounded up all these bears at Yellowstone and no one could pick him out of a line up. True story.
34. Meghan - November 5, 2007 5:23 PM
#20 jimmy is right. People magazine is way wrong - She's from Wexford PA. think they'd know that
i think she's hot though haha. her husband looks like bigfoot but.. smaller
35. mal - November 5, 2007 8:35 PM
i;m so happy mr superfish got hilarious again :)
36. gerard Vandenberg - November 5, 2007 11:08 PM
JEEEEESUS, everytime is see this girl with her red nails, red lipstick or red trousers, or just all three. I have this feeling I want to PUKE!! There is now a new item which gives her faking looks again: THE SUNGLASSES!! This girl wanted to betray and FUCK the necessary men to give her career the boost she wanted and thought was needed. Just playing the whore answers everything, she though!! And now she want America to love her faking looks: NO, NO GIRL.................................ADIOS LOSER!!
37. glyniss - November 6, 2007 1:31 AM
it does not make any difference to announce she's pregnant or no because everyone knows she is!
38. Lexoka - November 6, 2007 3:29 AM
"I'm a lucky girl." My God, is she blind?
39. Axeldee - November 6, 2007 8:04 AM
WHAT SHOCKING ANNOUNCEMENT?
http://www.spymac.com/details/?2298228
40. Laura - November 6, 2007 8:53 AM
Yeah, she's from Pittsburgh, not New York.
41. Soy - November 6, 2007 10:50 AM
at least..
she Really Can Sing.
..Britney has the same body with no baby on board
42. AmeriCanadian - November 6, 2007 12:05 PM
The title should be "No shit, Sherlock!"
Or perhaps "Really? We Still Don't Give a Shit"
I hate Xtina, always have.
43. Riotboy - November 6, 2007 2:36 PM
She looks Bow-Legged.
/yup
44. Matthew - November 6, 2007 3:19 PM
at lest she be a better parent than britney is.....
45. Kim - November 10, 2007 1:44 AM
I view this story on site http://adultvidstore.info/index.php?q=Kim_Kardashian
46. vjghjhj - December 3, 2007 8:43 PM
i won't to fuck her