Oct 15 2007Britney Spears knows how to pick a hiding place

Yuck

First bitches!

Why does Brit need to buy Narnia on double clearance from Target???

Crap damn it!

She's reading a childrens book what a fucking surprise. Come on Brit be realistic that book has far to many words and no pictures. sometimes you just have to know your limits... Oh fuck what am I saying, Brit know her limits... never mind that's just crazy talk.

lmao @ double clearance form target!!!!!!!LMAO

Zits? Check
Pasty face? Check
Those damn boots? Check
Dirty hair? Check
BRITNEY SPEARS? Check

Thank you, I couldn't start my week without new reasons to puke.
(She looks thinner, but still fugly)

This is the first time she has ever worn black in a while. It looks so elegant with her brunette hair pulled up.

But what is so interesting is that the other customers don't even seem to notice her or the Pap.

Her nails are so cute with most of her Nail Polish chipped off, it reminds me of a teenaged girl

Lookie har...it's rel nicce..she got it at Tarr-git.

It's the chronic! What? Cles of narnia!

http://youtube.com/watch?v=HYn1wTKXel8

funny ass video.

Wow, for someone who's constantly spotted buying makeup, how come she doesn't use any to cover up that PIZZA-FACE??? And she can afford to order any fucking thing she wants online and have it delivered to one of her mansions...yet she whines about the paparazzi (which she invites to wherever she goes)?!?! I hate this useless attention-starved twat. I hope she crashes and burns VERY SOON.

Her dress color matches her armpit stubble. Classy.

Oh Britney! Everyone knows you can't read. What a silly!

WHAT??? No poonanny shots today?
Damn!!

More Brit's bits, please.

Yeah dude, the LAST place you'd expect to find Britney is behind a book. I'd say this is the best damn disguise yet.

Poor Britney. She's so scared and broken now. I feel so sorry for her. I pray that she finds God's comfort and peace. A meditation:

I wonder if we'll smile in our coffins while loved ones
Mourn the day, the absence of our faces, living, laughing,
Eyes awake. Is this too much for them to take?

Too young for ones conclusion, the lifestyle won.
Such values you taught your son. That's how.

Look at me now. I'm broken.
Inherit my life.

One day we all will die, a cliched fact of life. Force fed
To make us heed. Inbred to sponge our bleed. Every
Warning, a leaking rubber, a poison apple for mingled
Blood. Too young for ones delusion the lifestyle cost
Venereal Mother embrace the loss. That's how

Look at you now. You're broken
Inherit your life.

Come on, guys, lighten up. Obviously she is hurting and in need right now. In need of a coffee maker. If we all chip in, we could get her one! Then she wouldn't need to go out for coffee and have to use up all her clever disguises.

@17 - Before you get ripped on for supporting Britney, I want to say that I like your poetry. I'm serious, whatever inspires you, keep it up. This, however, probably isn't the best place to post it...

Perhaps the flashing of cameras and the hollering of onlookers has become soothing like a lullabye to Brit. It's like white noise, and now the only way she can unwind is in their presence.

The more likely scenario being, of course, she's trying to improve her image to seem a bit more intellectual. With fantasy books. Perhaps she mistook it for a textbook?

Save the Boots!! Cant she afford a cute pair of sandals?

ewwww @ the close up of the back of her head. It looks like her hair weaves are pulling what little real hair she has out.

22- EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! Why did you make me look?????

HAHA TARGET.
But yeah. I do feel bad for brit and I like the poetry.

.. there is no way she is reading that book though. I mean, reading?

Oh and a question...
Did she put her autograph on her frap/whateversheisdrinking cup?
o_O

#22, I have to admit I checked out that picture to see the extensions, but then I saw she's got backne and threw up a bit and backed away...

Dear #19. Ript1&0

#17's "poetry" is Pantera lyrics.

Mmmm.. Hairs in her necklace and back pimples... delicious!

How sad a life to be a pap chasing around this poor attention starved child. Hasn't she ever heard of a fucking drive-thru? Obviously not, b/c then the cameras couldn't get her classy snatch shots. With or without kids, this one should be supervised at all times. It's obvious she can barely function in society anymore.

#27: ding ding ding CORRECT! Ditto previous "prayers" or "meditations" in past comment threads. Pretty funny to watch people get worked up over "holy roller" comments that are actually song lyrics from a redneck meth-thrash metal band.

@27 LOL is that true? Oh man that's funny "a meditation" no less. Good stuff. Did anyone notice she's reading a kid's book? Oh yeah, there it is. Ok I got nothin'.

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#17 that was great!

Here's a nice meditation about motherhood for brit.....

Tell your children not to walk my way
Tell your children not to hear my words
What they mean
What they say
Mother

Mother
Can you keep them in the dark for life
Can you hide them from the waiting world
Oh mother

Father
Gonna take your daughter out tonight
Gonna show her my world
Oh father

Not about to see your light
But if you wanna find hell with me
I can show you what it's like
Till you're bleeding

Dear Abby;

I have this employer I'll call "Idiotney." Every day, she dresses up in a formal evening gown (well, formal for her hillbilly ass) and cowboy boots. She makes me drive her to every Starbucks in town so she can get something to drink that I can't pronounce. The paparazzi chase us everywhere, so she borrows my "Chronicles of Narnia" book to hide her acne-riddled face (like she can actually read something without big pictures). The paparazzi get really trashy whore type photos of "Idiotney" because --- well, she's a trashy whore. But they don't understand why she doesn't wear underwear when she goes out. I've asked "Idiotney" why she doesn't wear underwear and she says it's because she likes the feel of the flashbulbs going off on her cootchie. I think it's because she probably has incurable vaginal rot. She likes to get naked when I get her back to her residence and invite me into her pool, where she tries to rub her infected disease-riddled body against my flaccid pee-pee. In spite of the double-dose of chlorine I add to the pool every day, I can still smell her putrifying labia. Should I go all the way with her, or save myself for a self-respecting crack whore?

Signed,
PeePee is Scared; No, I mean REALLY REALLY scared

I love that she bought it on clearance at Target!!!

Celebrities must learn to show "CLEAN" looks. Especially your person britney. Because alot celebs in America think they look HOT, but are looking like a desperate and cheap WHORE!! Do not use fucking coloured nailpollish. You are not a twelve year old girl who is experimenting with the bright coloured nail-polish from mum: GROW UP!! Onyour lips also use white lipstick and on your nails white nailpollish. This looks soooooooooo much better and much more expensive!!
ELIMINATE THE BLACK, PINK, RED and all other colours nailpolish and lipstick. Use "WHITE" instead!!

@30 - Wait... that was Pantera?? Hahahhhahaha!!!! No wonder I liked it!! That's hilarious!! Awesome.

Dammit, I was already with an awesome comment about how it's actually a brilliant hiding place because no one would think to look for Britney anywhere near a book, but #16. Ript1&0 beat me to it.

So I'll just observe that I'm not sure who's more pathetic now, Britney or the assholes with cameras who follow her everywhere. Maybe that's her strategy (see, she really is brilliant): do shit that's so crazy and humiliating that nothing she could possibly do would be interesting enough to photograph. Except set herself on fire, I guess. She's saving that for last. I hope.

@ 17 bethany....

hey before I read your post here I had put something up about how i wanted you to post pics with you playing with yourself, but now i realize you are probably about 13 years old and i would like to retract my previous post for fear of seeming horribly age-innappropriate.

at any rate i would like to second number 19 on suggesting you take your junior high school ass someplace soft and squishy where people love the privileged because they, too are privileged. Because Britney exists to be a wasted life for cameras to feed on for our amusement. She has "inherited her life" and has it ten times better than most people. If you don't think so go ask some bloated Biafran child who has flies in his eyes and doesn't have the energy to shoo them away...

@34, ok that one I know Danzig right?

Well, at least we don't have to see her coochie today.

37- in english please!

yup- Danzig........ I figured since we're quoting rock bands............

she needs to take off the boots

She's reading in the middle of the book. You and I know know she has not read the first half of the book.

She just picked the middle and started reading, because she knows she just good a couple of pages anyway before the book is abandoned.

40? You hit the nail on the head. Why is it that all of these people are so goddamn concerned about Jesus and Britney when there is so much suffering in the world. Genocide, starvation. I think Jesus would want us to write about those people, Bethany. I think it saddens him that we all waste our time on this self centered, hillbilly whore, when our energies could be used elsewhere.

Pic 7: close-up side view. FAT. Case closed.

Thanks Veggi, and who'd of thunk it? Thrash and Death metal provide such good advice to white trash celebutard mothers. Never knew the metal could kick so much fuckin' ass while curing post-partum depression. That totally rules dude. Rock on mental health!

#40 & #47 - Wow.

(hand flying over top of head)

just...wow.

What, no crotch shot this trip?

Bethany (#17 & #50) - Nice work. Naked bootleg, faked the entire defense out, strolled in for six.

HEY! BRITNEY looks GOOD!

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What?? No flashing today getting out of the car? She musta benn con-cen-trat-ing on the book? Can't do two things at once you know! At least it is not upside down. That wuda fooled everyone!

@47 wait wait wait... just to make sure we are on the same page here....

I am not concerned with whether or not Jebus is sad.

I am here to make fun of celebrities (especially this particular Hillbilly Whore) and have found the religious zealots to be an added bonus.

I apologize for bringing up any "real" problems from the world because I do not think this is the time nor place for it.

I would still like to see some pics of Bethany playing with herself to some of those little religious tracts (unless she is under 18 in which case what I meant was i would like to see some pictures of a pony or something totally non-threatening)

Britney looks like an 40 years old woman !! Pathethic !

Hey Sam! What page are you on? I'm on page 72.

Leave her alone, seriously. Like you've never had zits or a bad hair day. If you hate her so much, stop reading about her! Love her or hate her, you're still thinking about her...and that's exactly what she wants! :)

@57 You might want to pick up a book sometime. Might help you speak proper english, border jumper..........

her hands are ALWAYS disgusting.
Does she put them in a garbage disposal?

I know this is crazy talk, but what if the pap vowed not to follow Britney for one whole week. If they completely ignored her she would lose it for sure. It's obvious she lives for the pap. She might even start wearing underwear to spite them.

OK, who superglued those boots on her feet? Who did it? C'mon, man up and confess, ya weenie! I'm having nightmares about those things. The toe-fungus! The nail-rot! AAAGGGHHHH!!

Flashing one's crotch must burn a lot of calories. She's looking pretty damn slim to me, Frappachinos or no. Why do we keep hearing that she's so fat?

Someone must have told her generation at some point that "there's no such thing as bad publicity". Britney, bad publicity exists. Believe in it.

Honestly though, I bet she'd clean up pretty good, if someone would give her decent extensions and wardrobe etc. She could give Katie Holmes a run for her money.

Veggi... I hope I am on the page with the little back woods girl and the people praying for her, otherwise I need to put the lotion away...

WTF is she wearing?? I'd have more style than that if my closet puked on me after my cat peed on all of my clothes.

ha! 65. little 6 pound 8 ouch baby jezuz, all wrapped up in a cloth, doesn't even know a word yet, we'd like to thank you.

ps: I bet she thinks her name is narnia.

Brit is starting to remind me of one of those barfly type chicks that wears her old prom dress because it reminds her of a time before the booze and dope robbed her of youth and beauty. Pretty fucking pathetic.

I would just like to comment that the book in her hand is from target. on double clearance. don't blow all the dough in one place brit

I think in that last pic her eyes are closed. Readin's hard y'all. Don't hate edjucate.

LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!!!

www.myspace.com/trixiethepixie3

she's such a regular at Charbucks that they write her name on the cup with a heart.

and no wonder why she gets in so many fucking car accidents. she's got more baby shoes on her rearview mirror than michael jackson, she can't even see.

why is she SO lazy
i kinda of want her to stop being lazy and look consistently good again

she could start by wearing clothes that fit and coordinate, and washing and drying her hair everyday, then maybe lose that stubborn 10-15 pounds
im tired of this bohemian junk food country princess thing.
....
and if she thought she looked like a pig at the vmas she should stop sucking on frapuccinos!!!!!!!! idiot

she has potential.... most people would look like even more like shit if this is how they put themselves together.

atleast she hasn't been out at night as much the last couple weeks

She isn<t fooling anyone .. she can"t read

@11: I love that vid. Cracks me up every time I see it.

Also, Chronicles of Narnia is a kick-ass book. I'm amazed Britney's "reading" it. No doubt she has an active imagination, though, if she thinks her new album is going to actually help revive her so-called career.

Buy a damn coffee machine already fatso!

@76 Exactly what she needs or her own starbucks store even. But i guess this is better then her going to bk every night.

She's looking quite...fleshy. And I like how she puts red nail polish on her little nubs; I mean really, whats the point? Why draw attention to them when they already look like crap? Ooooh, maybe she likes chewing on them; reminds her of her childhood days, when she used to eat the lead paint off the walls at home; ah-soooo.

I just read The Heroin Diaries by Nikki Sixx - a great read, distubing and definitely a warning to others.

I look forward to The Donut Diaries.

If I had a monkey, I'd name it britney. But I don't have a monkey. I think they throw shit at you, so maybe I don't want one after all. I'd take a coffee right now, though.

Oh come on! If it weren't for the boots and if I didn't know who she was... I'd totally hit that.

But I see those boots and I have olfactory hallucinations of total foot cheese stank... ugh... gah...

"Ew, what smells like bootfeet?"

21 - you don't want to see her in sandals. trust me....

isn't that dress a little low cut in the front? i guess if she's not flashing her vage, she's gotta have at least a nip slip!

La Vache!!

I gave myself to Jesus.

Now he doesn't call.

Maybe she's just f*cking with us now. Reading Narnia in her car? Maybe next time she comes dressed as a giant pickle riding a stick pony. Would it be so hard to imagine?

Actually, hiding behind a book was a good disguise: few people would believe that Britney Spears is literate.

if she would leave JUST the whipped cream off of those things, it would take it from 500 calories a pop to 380....i mean sweet Jesus, how is she not the size of a damn HOUSE??? she drinks like 4 a day!!!

There's about two Big Macs worth of calories and fat in those things. Especially when you get the half-gallon jumbo Slurpee size like she does...

Wow, you would think she would drive around looking for a drive thru Starbucks and reading Dick and Jane OD!!

the picture of the back of her head, with the lousy extensions and the scabby scalp is really nauseating.

well the good news is soon we'll have round two of bald britney since the extensions are pulling the real hair out. wait, did i say good news?

wow she's reading a childrens book and its for her own amusement, not her chidrens. Big surprise. I actually didn't think it was Britney cause not flashing us her vagina while getting out of her car kind of threw me off.

She's a princess of the people - it's important for her to be out in the real world mingling with her loyal subjects - it's instant gratification for her.

With such massive influence over our youngsters, it is impressive to see this much-admired media icon with a book in her hands. Now look, you know and I know that Ms. Spears is essentially illiterate, but that's irrelevant. She's holding a book, and is pretending to read it. Our impressionable youth may therefore decide to also try reading ("reading is cool because Britney does it!"), instead of taking tons of drugs, screwing lots of random guys, exposing their bodies in public, abusing their own children and animals, and acting overall like a complete, zit-faced, metally handicapped skank. Like Britney used to do.....

YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA the bad boots and visiable bad weave are back !! And I just just hear the inner monologue!!! Wow me thinks this book as pretty pictures, maybe I will try some reading too. oooh brain freeze hmmmm now what was I doing ooh yea shiny things.

All I can say is I'm really glad there;s not so much 'I'd do this to her' crap on here anymore...it's actually entertaining again.
(THANK YOU BOYS!!) I'm sorry, it's the visual part of my brain..I can't see you, but I have a PRETTY good idea of what you look like, and I know what Britney("Brit" to her closest online friends) looks like, and well....oh god there it goes again...make it stop!!

The worst thing about her appearance is that those boots have been worn so many fricking times they're FADING, and she could buy the shoe dept at Saks, but she chooses them every day over all the other pairs she could wear.
Now that's just sad.

At least she got most of her garbage covered up.

WHEN are we all going to just agree to a Britney Ban? I'm so unbelievably tired of pictures of this disgusting Southern hick buying coffee every day. And on that note, #25, the staff @ Starbucks writes your name on your cup, duh. I ordered a green tea back in 1972 and I know that. Anyways, what is that on the left side of her face? Scary shit. But seriously, the Britney people knew and loved is gone, and will never return. This blob of a woman is not pretty, talented, or even interesting. She's just sad, and I'm sorry if she's "going through a rough time," the type of rough time that 99% of the world would love to be going through themselves. News flash: Lindsay Lohan was moreso "going through a rough time," Britney is a bad, unfit mother. And based on that, as far as I'm concerned, a bad, worthless person. So lets just fucking end it.

I thought I had told you to throw away thoes UGLY boots..!
She's defenatly the worst dresser ever.

Seriously now - I don't give a damn about ANYTHING else - I just want someone to explain those stinking damn boots to me - nothing else. I need to understand WHY she's ALWAYS wearing those damn boots!

For the love of god, people, she doesn't have backne! There are a couple of teensy, tiny zits on the back of her neck! Everyone is like that! Especially when they're horrifically stressed out and eating a lot of crap food!

I mean, I am not supporting her, but still. She already has enough to make fun of her. Stop looking for things that don't exist.

Someone must ask the Brit what the plot synopsis of the book is and lets see what she answers....y'all she prolly thinks the book is a documentary....

100, calm down. they don't do that at all the Charbucks. i've never been asked for my name. they just yell out what you ordered. writing your name on the cup is too personal for nyc.

Narnia on the outside, coloring book with biiig pictures and no words on the inside.

First of all, didn't know that she could read. With regards to Starbucks, why doesn't she just find out how to open a franchise in her house that way she won't have to drive anywhere....

That's so cute, she's pretending to read. She actually looks okay -- the dress is cute, the boots, not so much. She could use a stylist & some shampoo. And it's obvious she's using drugs because all the toxins in drugs trigger acne. I agree -- she looks thinner, but those 400 million calorie trendy Starbuck drinks aren't going to help with her weight issues, no, not so much. Her arms are looking a little flabby. God, I wish she would get some help with a glam team & blow everyone away by lookinf good again. Someday...
I can't wait to see the promo picture for her new CD.

*I WILL PAY TO HAVE SOMEONE WRESTLE HER TO THE GROUND, TAKE THOSE BOOTS, AND BURN THEM IN FRONT OF HER.*

103. I have never had any acne on my back. Or even a pimple. I'm very lucky in that manner. Yea, I get a pimple on my face once a month, but my back is literally, perfect. So there. Not everyone gets acne on their backs. Way to be.

ok seriously.... how many WEEKS in a row has she worn those boots? They aren't ugly boots but they DO NOT go with every outfit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

to #108
you are a complete fucking idiot.

"And it's obvious she's using drugs because all the toxins in drugs trigger acne"

Well done.... that probably accounts for 0.0002% of acne in people worldwide.

Not to mention the fact you know fuck all about her, anything she does, and apparently what causes acne. Scientists and medical professionals can't even decide on the causes of acne, fucking genius.

I hate when people make up the fucking goddamn shittiest reasons to try and "prove" that a celeb has took drugs...
There isn't even any proof that she's ever taken drugs. I'm not saying she hasn't but I mean there is no real proof, like the court ordered drug testing. At least wait until then, lest you look like an even bigger fucking idiot.

Lookit all those mothers on her. Sick.

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