I've seen pregnant women before, but Naomi Watts is out of control. If I didn't know she was pregnant I would've guessed she was faking it. And faking it poorly. I wonder how she felt when she got her ultrasound and found out she was giving birth to a traffic cone.
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Reader Comments
1. gaby - July 20, 2007 12:55 PM
holy crap!
2. MissDior17 - July 20, 2007 12:56 PM
That's huge. Must be triplets.
3. P911GT10C - July 20, 2007 12:56 PM
She givin birth to a 3yr old?
4. woodhorse - July 20, 2007 12:58 PM
That has got to hurt like hell. Everyone stay out of her way or bitch will share some of her pain.
5. samo - July 20, 2007 1:00 PM
this kid will have to go to 1st grade straight away! or to a wrestling fight..
6. katers - July 20, 2007 1:06 PM
I feel like that woman has been pregnant forever. Fuck, I've had three kids since she announced. GET ON WITH IT!
7. lickmybutt - July 20, 2007 1:07 PM
YAY!!! fish is actually funny today. muahaha.
8. Vicky - July 20, 2007 1:09 PM
it must be a boy... apparently when the belly is kinda pointy (this is a perfect example) is a boy, and if it is saggy and rounded its a girl .. I dont know.. thats just what people say ..
9. Macy - July 20, 2007 1:15 PM
Vicky, it is a boy.
10. Ammortal - July 20, 2007 1:19 PM
damn, now that's exactly the kind of humor writing that started me frequenting this site.
well spake!!
11. Superfish - July 20, 2007 1:24 PM
Hey Fish, Don't trash talk Naomi Watts like that! I'd still bang her. I'd bang that bitch so hard and so long she'd scream KING KONG!!!!!!
12. OH SHIT SHE'S PREGGERS - July 20, 2007 1:29 PM
Wow! Screw the whole "it's a boy, it's a girl" thing. She's getting ready to punch out a fucking mmidget. Either that or a baby Elephant. Who knows? With the increasingly high capacity of weight gain in Pregnant women nowadays, they can give birth to teenagers and it would be normal.
13. Jen - July 20, 2007 1:31 PM
I'm about that pregnant right now- geez guys could you be a little nicer to the ninth month preggo! You guys should thank God every day that women have the babies, most guys would crumble!
14. wedgeone - July 20, 2007 1:34 PM
Make the arms bigger and that's my dad.
15. Pat - July 20, 2007 1:35 PM
CANNONBALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!
16. jenny - July 20, 2007 1:41 PM
LOL@14
The veins in her wrists are a little scary though.
17. schack - July 20, 2007 2:11 PM
that thing is gonna tear right out of her skin if she's not careful
18. FirstTimeCaller - July 20, 2007 2:14 PM
@14 lol!
19. Bern - July 20, 2007 2:39 PM
That is a basketball under her shirt. Fakest thing, ever.
20. Chauncey Gardner - July 20, 2007 2:43 PM
Are we sure Liev Schreiber didn't get sucked in there are a result of a freak sex accident?
21. Italian Stallion - July 20, 2007 3:06 PM
Damn!! That light bulb is going to be at least 360 Watts.............
22. WallyIsAFuckingDoucheBag - July 20, 2007 3:12 PM
jesus tap-dancing xrist! i though Sara Jean Lilac Queen was brooding the devil spawn but apparently Naomi is putting up some fierce competition.
23. becca - July 20, 2007 3:17 PM
JESUS CHRIST. i thought that was photoshopped for a split second.
24. lambman - July 20, 2007 4:16 PM
That makes Kate Holmes pregnance look real!
25. TheRage - July 20, 2007 4:32 PM
i've never before heard that rumor about a boy making the pregnant belly pointy and the girl making it round. i've heard that a rounder belly means a boy and an oblong (like a watermelon) means a girl.
26. Hecubus - July 20, 2007 4:43 PM
This is what happens when you let a 50ft tall Gorilla fuck you.
27. wedgeone - July 20, 2007 4:49 PM
#14 - I'll bet when the placenta comes out, she'll name it "SchackTroll".
28. Bill Clinton - July 20, 2007 5:09 PM
Damn, she looks like she's got the role in the remake of Xtro as the woman who gives birth to a fully grown man.
29. Cloe - July 20, 2007 5:18 PM
Yeah--that's EXACTLY what I look like now at 36 weeks--and to think they never told us in health class that pregnancy is actually 40.5 weeks! She could get bigger than that!!!!! Do you think Liev will be in the delivery room with a camera? Directing?
30. Amanda - July 20, 2007 5:32 PM
That looks VERY uncomfortable!
31. Sauron - July 20, 2007 5:48 PM
Looks like she swallowed a 15th century cannon-ball.
32. Lowlands - July 20, 2007 5:59 PM
Holly Crap!This is one of the reasons why you've to watch out when you're doing some skippyball jumping girls!Always wear pants!
33. SexyBeach - July 20, 2007 6:51 PM
26 lmao!! Genius.
"This is what happens when you let a 50ft tall Gorilla fuck you."
34. Chauncey Gardner - July 20, 2007 7:33 PM
Maybe all those long, loving looks between Naomi Watts and King Kong led to a bun in the oven. I don't know how she'll carry Kong, Jr. to term without exploding, though.
35. tati - July 20, 2007 7:53 PM
im surprised she hasn't gained massive weight in other parts of her body. her arms look pretty nice. i just want to see how she's going to recover from that skin stretching.
36. mulva - July 20, 2007 9:11 PM
Wow, she's still carrying awfully high for as far along as she is. Look at this picture of Bridget Moynahan and how low she's carrying. http://www.blogsmithmedia.com/www.tmz.com/media/2007/07/0718_moynahan_flynet.jpg
Don't listen to all those pregnancy wives' tales (pointy=boy, round=girl, etc.). They don't mean jack.
37. Hollie - July 20, 2007 9:54 PM
It's a boy!
38. Hollie - July 20, 2007 9:54 PM
It's a boy!
39. swan - July 20, 2007 10:00 PM
She really is pink and glowing. I just had my son in November. 9th (really 10th) month sucks so badly. It's funny how they NEVER mention the fucked up stuff that happens to you and how AWFUL you are going to feel. Please have respect for all of your moms- definitely the hardest thing I have ever done, hands down.
I can compare it to a swollen tomato about to pop out of its skin while you're hot and pounding with every step like a giant elephant. The best part is when the baby comes out. Then afterward sucks too.
The baby is totally worth it though.
Sorry to go off!
40. krazihottkelli♦♦♦♦♦♦♦ - July 20, 2007 10:42 PM
zhe lookz like zhez having
a horze..and
I'll bet that zhe haz a C=
zection..like
the rezt of theze Chickenzhitz
do..thatz ztomach
makez me zick, dumb=bitch☻
41. crushed-x-beauty - July 20, 2007 10:54 PM
OMFG, She's going to give birth to Kim Kardishian's ass!
42. BoutrosBoutrosGhali - July 20, 2007 11:10 PM
#41 ROFLMAO.......
43. ImpeachBush - July 21, 2007 2:44 AM
The shorter you are, the bigger your stomach during pg.
She's barely 5'5", hence the enormous belly.
I'm 5'8" & wasn't 1/2 that big w/my boy. Also I worked out a lot.
Makes all the difference.
44. 24 - July 21, 2007 5:01 AM
ummm... Holy shit?
45. Tessa - July 21, 2007 5:44 AM
Naomi Watts is kinda annoying. Her belly is abnormous!
46. yajick - July 21, 2007 9:27 AM
I looked the same way when I was pregnant. I bet she's having a boy.
47. lala - July 21, 2007 10:01 AM
wow yep its a boy
48. luxe - July 21, 2007 11:19 AM
i'm sorry, but couldn't she wear something that flows AWAY from the belly? i would.
49. 1seekspie - July 21, 2007 12:16 PM
HOLY SHIT! It's like King Kong got her pregnant! It looks like it's going to bust right out of her like in that movie Alien.
50. carmie - July 21, 2007 12:26 PM
haha it looks like she's got a basketball under her shirt...
51. carmie - July 21, 2007 12:26 PM
haha it looks like she's got a basketball under her shirt...
52. Sara - July 21, 2007 12:42 PM
#48, that'd look even worse, like wearing a tent instead of actual clothes.
I think she looks cute, and she's really all belly. Which isn't that hard, I guess, when you're as short as her.
53. ♦♦♦♦♦♦♦krazihottkelli♦♦♦♦♦♦♦ - July 21, 2007 12:54 PM
My mom zaid that zhez either
gonna have a boy or 2 or
3 boyz..boyz R carried high,
and girlz zuppozedly zit
on your bladder down low☻☻☻♦
54. Parry Hotter - July 22, 2007 4:29 AM
Harry is a Horcrux... Harry lives and Voldemort dies in Deathly Hallows!
55. porkbellies - July 22, 2007 10:07 AM
Talk about a porkbelly, well, at least she has an excuse. Still, she looks like she carrying a hog in that stomach.
56. Caio Guip - July 22, 2007 5:10 PM
it's like a baby boom about to happen
57. hobieluv83 - July 22, 2007 5:11 PM
that child (or children) is/are ridiculously high in her body. It's like she's carrying them in her chest cavity, not her womb.
58. nymphetomine - July 22, 2007 8:08 PM
Ok, guys & girls (who haven't been pgegnant for what sems like eternity,) shut the hell up!! #13, Jen, i hear you. I'm 5'3"& gained 52lbs. with my second son. I was ready to kill any idiots that crossed my path. There were many. And ended up with 2 stretch marks on my lower stomach. There is a recipe of creams & health food stuff I used. Happy to share if any one wants. People be nice; pregnant women have raging hormones. Just a friendly warning.
59. JMed - July 22, 2007 8:09 PM
At least she's not going to give birth the complete US Army, like salma hayek!
60. Lexington Steele - July 23, 2007 3:33 AM
Now howz dat bitch gon' have no'mal relations when dat baby done come out her hoo-hoo? She gon' whistle like a coke bottle when da win' blow. Ima do the right thang n' offah mah services fo' her sassfacshun - dey's a big ol' fire hydrant right outsida mah crib.
61. paris' godly spirit - July 23, 2007 4:07 AM
at first i thought she must have victoria beckham shoved up there, you know how depserate she is to be photographed, i mean who needs to see her face?
But then i thought not because the bump would be considerably smaller and bonier if it was old vicky.
62. anytwerp - July 23, 2007 4:33 AM
"I've had a baby, and this is normal...drone...drone...drone" STFU. If you have had a baby, you have got no idea what you look like from a distance.
The fact is, she is **enormous**.
When she has given birth, her cunt will be so badly stretched, King Kongs cock is going to be like a string in a bucket of water.
63. Flipp Snooky Wilbot - July 23, 2007 8:36 AM
Aww! She is so cute! And so is her tummy. =-)
64. booknerd - July 23, 2007 11:00 AM
kelli- you are the reason that abortion is legal.
65. knocked_up - July 23, 2007 12:08 PM
Good lord! I've had twins and that even looks odd to me! Preggers with a boy (about the same gestation) now and don't look anything like that. And yes, anytwerp, I know what I look like from a distance. They're called pictures. That baby will drop soon, hopefully it won't look so odd then.
66. kix - July 23, 2007 1:14 PM
Oh, my god! A pregnant woman-- the shock, the horror. Jesus, grow up people. I am sure when your mother was pregnant with you she looked AMAZING.
67. slamdunk - July 23, 2007 2:10 PM
kelli, you and your mom are proof that idiocy is genetically linked.
68. BB - July 23, 2007 3:17 PM
Please induce this poor woman! Good lord, that looks painful, how is she even walking around?? I've been pregnant, never that pregnant!
69. BB - July 23, 2007 3:17 PM
Please induce this poor woman! Good lord, that looks painful, how is she even walking around?? I've been pregnant, never that pregnant!
70. Kari Jones - July 23, 2007 6:22 PM
Where are her boobs? Mine were huge during preggers!!!
71. Kari Jones - July 23, 2007 6:23 PM
Where are her boobs? Mine were huge during preggers!!!
72. fordluvngirl - July 24, 2007 11:05 AM
Hello there buddy. As if a woman is not paranoid enough about her body, let's insult her while she's bringing a lifeform into the world. Guys are such dicks. This guy the other day told the mother of his child that she had a fat ass. Duh!! If ya'll had to pump out a child or two, you'd understand.
PS Chick that don't gain a little extra weight (I don't care what the docs say) have dumber kids and more problems with their own health afterwards. So,
SHUT THE FUCK UP!
73. Dee - July 24, 2007 4:38 PM
I bet she is as every bit uncomfortable as she looks. It isnt going to help making horrible statements about her pregnancy looks. The world is so stuck on the way people should look its sick. Each and every woman carries their children different so have a heart and keep the rudness to yourselfs!
74. Spacelamb - July 24, 2007 10:16 PM
Her boyfriend is 6'2", so I guess we know he's definitely the father!
75. The Virgin Fucker - May 10, 2008 7:56 PM
Dude if me and her were trapped at sea i would use her as a floatation device to get back to shore seriously wouldn't u use ur preganant wife/girlfriend etc.etc. to get back to shore??
76. Pot Smoker - May 10, 2008 8:01 PM
#75 The Virgin Fucker<----I agree with you
If i had nothing else at all to use to get back to shore i would use that to float back then when i do get back to shore i'll use her belly as a drum and play some drum solos(he he he he)
77. Stone Cold Rocker Man - May 10, 2008 8:06 PM
I LIKE DRUMS SOLOS!!!! i would sure use that belly for RIZZSOCKING DRUM SOLOS WOOOOO DRUM SOLOS DRUM SOLOS DODODODOODODODODODODODODODODO i'll get some good practice in as a bonus( :) ) woot!!!!
78. Guy with a stick - May 11, 2008 11:15 AM
Is she able to lift her legs without the knee hitting the belly or can she bend over to take a hard cock doggy style also if it gets any bigger soon enough she can't move and will have to be rolled everywhere. i would use her monster belly as a pillow to sleep on.i also wonder how much amniotic fluid she got in that belly. poking people with sticks is fun. poking preggies one week from birth is more fun
79. TheClan09 - December 4, 2009 6:54 PM
TEN THINGS TO LOVE ABOUT EVERTHING THIS
1 I dont know her but....
2 ....I dont aprecciate this writers thoughts on a picture that doesnt concern them
3 She looks normal and fine, Im sure anyone would love to sleep with her.
4 Shes hot and I would sleep with her if she wanted to.
5 You people have a problem with your penis is this looks strange to you.
6 This is six.
7 I feel sorry for all you homos out there that take one look and go ew a girl.
8 Ew shes preggers(lol-fucking male homo sexuals that are so poor that cant afford to comment on my sixth Love Note(this)
9 If this were really my ninth reason it would be on six, thanks for reading.
10 I caught you reading my useless reasons.
11 Guess what Ill tell my 6th. I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
12th reason 9th reason I LOVE PREGNANTORS!!!
80. TheClan09 - December 4, 2009 6:54 PM
TEN THINGS TO LOVE ABOUT EVERTHING THIS
1 I dont know her but....
2 ....I dont aprecciate this writers thoughts on a picture that doesnt concern them
3 She looks normal and fine, Im sure anyone would love to sleep with her.
4 Shes hot and I would sleep with her if she wanted to.
5 You people have a problem with your penis is this looks strange to you.
6 This is six.
7 I feel sorry for all you homos out there that take one look and go ew a girl.
8 Ew shes preggers(lol-fucking male homo sexuals that are so poor that cant afford to comment on my sixth Love Note(this)
9 If this were really my ninth reason it would be on six, thanks for reading.
10 I caught you reading my useless reasons.
11 Guess what Ill tell my 6th. I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
12th reason 9th reason I LOVE PREGNANTORS!!!
81. TheClan09 - December 4, 2009 6:54 PM
TEN THINGS TO LOVE ABOUT EVERTHING THIS
1 I dont know her but....
2 ....I dont aprecciate this writers thoughts on a picture that doesnt concern them
3 She looks normal and fine, Im sure anyone would love to sleep with her.
4 Shes hot and I would sleep with her if she wanted to.
5 You people have a problem with your penis is this looks strange to you.
6 This is six.
7 I feel sorry for all you homos out there that take one look and go ew a girl.
8 Ew shes preggers(lol-fucking male homo sexuals that are so poor that cant afford to comment on my sixth Love Note(this)
9 If this were really my ninth reason it would be on six, thanks for reading.
10 I caught you reading my useless reasons.
11 Guess what Ill tell my 6th. I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
12th reason 9th reason I LOVE PREGNANTORS!!!
82. TheClan09 - December 4, 2009 6:54 PM
TEN THINGS TO LOVE ABOUT EVERTHING THIS
1 I dont know her but....
2 ....I dont aprecciate this writers thoughts on a picture that doesnt concern them
3 She looks normal and fine, Im sure anyone would love to sleep with her.
4 Shes hot and I would sleep with her if she wanted to.
5 You people have a problem with your penis is this looks strange to you.
6 This is six.
7 I feel sorry for all you homos out there that take one look and go ew a girl.
8 Ew shes preggers(lol-fucking male homo sexuals that are so poor that cant afford to comment on my sixth Love Note(this)
9 If this were really my ninth reason it would be on six, thanks for reading.
10 I caught you reading my useless reasons.
11 Guess what Ill tell my 6th. I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
12th reason 9th reason I LOVE PREGNANTORS!!!
83. TheClan09 - December 4, 2009 6:54 PM
TEN THINGS TO LOVE ABOUT EVERTHING THIS
1 I dont know her but....
2 ....I dont aprecciate this writers thoughts on a picture that doesnt concern them
3 She looks normal and fine, Im sure anyone would love to sleep with her.
4 Shes hot and I would sleep with her if she wanted to.
5 You people have a problem with your penis is this looks strange to you.
6 This is six.
7 I feel sorry for all you homos out there that take one look and go ew a girl.
8 Ew shes preggers(lol-fucking male homo sexuals that are so poor that cant afford to comment on my sixth Love Note(this)
9 If this were really my ninth reason it would be on six, thanks for reading.
10 I caught you reading my useless reasons.
11 Guess what Ill tell my 6th. I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
12th reason 9th reason I LOVE PREGNANTORS!!!
84. TheClan09 - December 4, 2009 6:54 PM
TEN THINGS TO LOVE ABOUT EVERTHING THIS
1 I dont know her but....
2 ....I dont aprecciate this writers thoughts on a picture that doesnt concern them
3 She looks normal and fine, Im sure anyone would love to sleep with her.
4 Shes hot and I would sleep with her if she wanted to.
5 You people have a problem with your penis is this looks strange to you.
6 This is six.
7 I feel sorry for all you homos out there that take one look and go ew a girl.
8 Ew shes preggers(lol-fucking male homo sexuals that are so poor that cant afford to comment on my sixth Love Note(this)
9 If this were really my ninth reason it would be on six, thanks for reading.
10 I caught you reading my useless reasons.
11 Guess what Ill tell my 6th. I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
12th reason 9th reason I LOVE PREGNANTORS!!!
85. TheClan09 - December 4, 2009 6:54 PM
TEN THINGS TO LOVE ABOUT EVERTHING THIS
1 I dont know her but....
2 ....I dont aprecciate this writers thoughts on a picture that doesnt concern them
3 She looks normal and fine, Im sure anyone would love to sleep with her.
4 Shes hot and I would sleep with her if she wanted to.
5 You people have a problem with your penis is this looks strange to you.
6 This is six.
7 I feel sorry for all you homos out there that take one look and go ew a girl.
8 Ew shes preggers(lol-fucking male homo sexuals that are so poor that cant afford to comment on my sixth Love Note(this)
9 If this were really my ninth reason it would be on six, thanks for reading.
10 I caught you reading my useless reasons.
11 Guess what Ill tell my 6th. I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
12th reason 9th reason I LOVE PREGNANTORS!!!
86. TheClan09 - December 4, 2009 6:54 PM
TEN THINGS TO LOVE ABOUT EVERTHING THIS
1 I dont know her but....
2 ....I dont aprecciate this writers thoughts on a picture that doesnt concern them
3 She looks normal and fine, Im sure anyone would love to sleep with her.
4 Shes hot and I would sleep with her if she wanted to.
5 You people have a problem with your penis is this looks strange to you.
6 This is six.
7 I feel sorry for all you homos out there that take one look and go ew a girl.
8 Ew shes preggers(lol-fucking male homo sexuals that are so poor that cant afford to comment on my sixth Love Note(this)
9 If this were really my ninth reason it would be on six, thanks for reading.
10 I caught you reading my useless reasons.
11 Guess what Ill tell my 6th. I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
12th reason 9th reason I LOVE PREGNANTORS!!!
87. TheClan09 - December 4, 2009 6:54 PM
TEN THINGS TO LOVE ABOUT EVERTHING THIS
1 I dont know her but....
2 ....I dont aprecciate this writers thoughts on a picture that doesnt concern them
3 She looks normal and fine, Im sure anyone would love to sleep with her.
4 Shes hot and I would sleep with her if she wanted to.
5 You people have a problem with your penis is this looks strange to you.
6 This is six.
7 I feel sorry for all you homos out there that take one look and go ew a girl.
8 Ew shes preggers(lol-fucking male homo sexuals that are so poor that cant afford to comment on my sixth Love Note(this)
9 If this were really my ninth reason it would be on six, thanks for reading.
10 I caught you reading my useless reasons.
11 Guess what Ill tell my 6th. I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
12th reason 9th reason I LOVE PREGNANTORS!!!