May 29 2007Lindsay Lohan crashes car, arrested for DUI and cocaine

In case you went on vacation over Memorial Day weekend like I did and missed it, Lindsay Lohan was arrested in Beverly Hills and charged with a misdemeanor DUI early Saturday morning after she crashed her 2005 Mercedes SL-65 convertible into a curb and some trees at 5:30 AM and then fled the scene. She was cited and then released because she has been admitted to a local hospital for minor injuries to her upper chest. Additionally, police found a "usable amount" of cocaine in her car which she could face additional charges for. The AP reports.
At the press conference Lt. McCann said: "A usable amount of an illegal narcotic tentatively identified as cocaine was recovered and booked. She was charged with a misdemeanor. There is a potential for additional charges." Her tentative arraignment date is Aug. 24.
I'm not entirely sure how she isn't in jail right now. Considering her driving and substance abuse record, the police could shoot her in the head and it'd be totally legal. It might even be written into the Constitution somewhere. I think near the bottom.
NOTE: Sorry it took so long to get this up. The moral of the story is: never ever go on vacation. At least not while retarded young girls are still considered celebrities. You never know what kind of insanity you'll miss.




Reader Comments
1. mikloso - May 29, 2007 6:39 AM
frist. there is a god... after all. thank you to Jesus.
2. Sugar - May 29, 2007 6:40 AM
...of all the things to be thankful for, you're glad you were first to post on an internet celeb rag blog?
3. James - May 29, 2007 6:45 AM
WTF?! Why is it that whenever someone's first to comment they write "FRIST" instead of "FIRST"?! I mean WTF?!?!?!?!
It's "FIRST" you dumb punch of f**ks!!
4. Gman - May 29, 2007 6:47 AM
So I guess the next pron DVD we should all wait for is "Linsey does Paris in jail"...
5. Mel - May 29, 2007 6:48 AM
I'm glad she's arrested. There's justice in this world. I like her even less than I like Paris
6. Wicko W - May 29, 2007 6:48 AM
Surely that's jail time right? Somebody could have been on that pavement!?! Won't somebody think of the children!!!
7. radmacdrunkpants - May 29, 2007 6:48 AM
Chuck her in the same cell with Paris and televise the catfight, I'd pay good money to watch the skank chunks fly !!
8. Mel - May 29, 2007 6:50 AM
Was he thanking God that he was first, or that she was arrested? If it's the former, he's almost as bad as she is.
9. xie - May 29, 2007 6:59 AM
What's an unusable amount of cocaine?
10. saradevil - May 29, 2007 6:59 AM
You think someone hopped up on cocaine would run faster.
11. techclerk - May 29, 2007 6:59 AM
@3
Anybody can be "first", but who can be FRIST?
12. CHA - May 29, 2007 7:00 AM
hahahahaha
karma is a bitch, ain't it?
let's all hope the justice system works for Lohan, too.
i mean, she's underage! and driving drunk! with cocaine in the car! if that was me, when I was 20, i'd already be in jail!
13. It's Me Fuckers - May 29, 2007 7:00 AM
The update is a little late... better late than never I suppose. I think maybe The Fish was on vacation?
14. Greg - May 29, 2007 7:00 AM
What I want to know is why she was driving a 2005 Merc? Can't she afford a new one?
15. radmacdrunkpants - May 29, 2007 7:02 AM
#9 - that would be the crusty bits left around the edge of her nostril....
16. SCOTLAND - May 29, 2007 7:11 AM
I Pledge Allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the Republic for which it stands,
one Nation under God,
indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.
17. krazihottkelli - May 29, 2007 7:15 AM
she must of blowed the copz
coz anyone else would have
been taken straight from the
hospital to jail..what a bitch..
18. Darth Hater - May 29, 2007 7:19 AM
Too bad she wasn't going, say, about 90mph.
She should go to jail just for wrecking such a sweet ride.
19. dannielynn'sdaddy - May 29, 2007 7:24 AM
Yes James, that's it exactly..... Never ask for an answer when you can spew testosterone all over the place and make yourself look like an idiot when there's a perfectly logical answer.
When it comes to idiots........ YOU'RE FRIST!
20. art - May 29, 2007 7:27 AM
Frist
21. hrhfort - May 29, 2007 7:27 AM
What a twat. Thought the same thing about the dated Merc. Shame she didn't half the other twats in Hollywood.
22. techclerk - May 29, 2007 7:31 AM
She wants to get drunk and snort coke all night, but she can't afford a sober driver to get her around?
Really?
Is she not aware that her movies are pure box office poison and eventually Hollywood will lose too much money trying to revive her sorry career?
Really? Wow!
The next movie with Lohan will be so easy to produce. Just change the title of "The Dana Plato Story" and it is a wrap.
23. Marcos Glez. - May 29, 2007 7:41 AM
THIS IS AMERICA! Go run over people with your car, sniff cocaine, get drunk and drive like chitichiti bang bang because nothing happens in this shitty country, go send lindsey and paris to bagdad to destroy the insurgency, this girls in 2 days will kill all of them with their cars..
24. Damitol - May 29, 2007 7:42 AM
Well, only in America can burned out teen stars and Kennedys walk away from an auto accident. And if you're a "star", you can be filmed doing so while you shake your well-groped ass back to your publicist's.
You don't find that in your Commie betwetter countries! God bless America!
25. Not LAPD - May 29, 2007 7:48 AM
What's an unusable amount of cocaine?
They are probably distinguishing betwee a "sellable" amount of cocaine, which would be a much more serious charge, i.e. possession with intent to distribute.
26. krazihottkelli - May 29, 2007 7:51 AM
hey douchebag....
I guezz she'll now
be carrying around
a Bible like Paris'z
sorry azzzzzzzzzzzzz!!!
27. techclerk - May 29, 2007 7:55 AM
It would be the ultimate irony if she spends her twentyfrist birthday in rehab because she wants to keep out of jail. It is just not safe to have a camera or be a tree when she's on the road.
Disney really knows how to scout them young, don't they?
28. Celebrities Uncovered - May 29, 2007 7:56 AM
Seems like there's a little bit of a coverup going on already. Photos taken about a mile away from the final crash indicate that she HIT A PEDESTRIAN and drove away right before losing it.
29. techclerk - May 29, 2007 7:57 AM
Herbie "Fully Loaded"
Prophetic title and casting.
30. mrs_tinkerbell_pan - May 29, 2007 7:58 AM
God Bless America!!
come fly with me and Peter Pan..
there are no skank coke whores
where we are going............
31. Lohan Fan - May 29, 2007 8:02 AM
I don't know why you guys are hating on her. I think she is a beautiful and a wonderfully talented actress. You guys are all just jealous.
32. surfergirls07 - May 29, 2007 8:06 AM
like rehab ever helped anyone..
they have better drugs there
then what she's on...
this bitch deserves jail time..
how many times must she wreck
that car before someone steps
in to save the next person in
her way!!
33. NicotineEyePatch - May 29, 2007 8:09 AM
Oh, how the skanky have fallen.
34. krazihottkelli - May 29, 2007 8:15 AM
oh, I'm so freakin jealouz
I want to be a drunken coke
whore, who wreckz my car ..
I also want my body to be
covered with extreme frecklez..
I also want it to be known
how many guyz that I have slept
with..give me more coke,,I am
so jealouz..
STFU==Lohan, the only fanz U
had were small children watching
that FreakyFreakinFriday, and
now, trust me,,those small
childrean R no longer your fanz
U coke crashin whore..
Lookz like the apple doesn't fall
far from the tree,,you'll end up
in prison just like your dada....
35. booga1134 - May 29, 2007 8:20 AM
Did you take a vacation to fucking Zmunda or the 3 other countries in the world that doesn't have Internet access? Being on vacation is a poor excuse, just say your were knee deep in sucking dicks and fucking the ripe assholes of 15 year old boys.
36. LifesAbitch - May 29, 2007 8:23 AM
#31..if I was an investor of her movies,
guess what,, the money would be no longer
invested in that coke whore..she isn't
even 21 and her live has fallen apart like
a middle aged washed up coke whore!
why would anyone be jealous of that?
37. hater - May 29, 2007 8:24 AM
i hate lindsay lohan, shes ugly. and whats so great about her.
38. Boba Fett - May 29, 2007 8:24 AM
Wow. I'm really suprised. I mean, who would think Lindsay would do something like this?
39. pushmybuttons - May 29, 2007 8:27 AM
last time I checked, cocaine was
a felony.. then why didn't she have
to sit in jail for the night?
40. CHA - May 29, 2007 8:31 AM
@31 jealous?? of crashing a car and arrested for DUI/coke possession? you gotta be fucking kidding me. what are you doing on this site anyways--i didn't even know lohan fans existed anymore.
41. Chauncey Gardner - May 29, 2007 8:31 AM
Bummer they didn't find a couple of keys of coke in her car. That would have been pretty fucking rad. But, with this much ham, you don't complain about having no bread. Kudos, cunt!
42. naughtygrl - May 29, 2007 8:32 AM
she didn't go to jail because she pays of the police just like in the Sopranos..
must be nice to own the police dept.
43. Steve Zissou - May 29, 2007 8:36 AM
She's just THIS close to winning an Oscar right now...
44. prestondramak7 - May 29, 2007 8:40 AM
The police deptpartment is looking like a joke..don't they know the world is watching them give favors to young troubled girls who need help! Police, you are enabling her just to keep up her bullshit habits. This chick is spinning so out of control..where are her parents?
45. pushmybuttons - May 29, 2007 8:51 AM
fleeing the scene automatically
sends a normal person to jail,
let on DUI and cocaine..this
pisses me off!!!!!!!!!!!!!
46. jemfysh - May 29, 2007 8:53 AM
@3
Because they want to be first, they type too quickly and don't take the time to proof-read, so "frist" is a typo (which has now become an "in" joke). You should understand that, typing "punch" instead of "bunch", although I suspect that's just crappy spelling...
47. krazihottkelli - May 29, 2007 8:56 AM
hurry, someone call
Al Sharpton.......
I'm sure he can help
with those Krookedkopz!
48. spindoc - May 29, 2007 8:56 AM
So let me get this straight. She flees the scene, they find cocain in the car and she has priors for car crashes and she is charged with a MISDOMEANOR?!?!?!?
Now she's back in phoney re-hab and her pubsicst is planting phoney comments from "Friends" that "She really understands she needs it" Bullshit, if she was REALLY serious about rehab she wouldn't be going into that phoney hotel Promises, she would be in a REAL re-hab. This chick needs court ordered rehab and some nice jailtime full of bad food and shower sexual harrassment.
49. techclerk - May 29, 2007 8:57 AM
Somebody sneak a gun with no bullets into her purse the next time she goes out, PLEASE!
50. techclerk - May 29, 2007 8:59 AM
@46
No, FRIST is actually the name of a person. It is an old joke. You had to be there.
51. krazihottkelli - May 29, 2007 8:59 AM
#46==please don't explain
thingz to them,,,if they're
that stupid...let them bitch
about it...Y do they care?
they have nothing better to say!!
52. techclerk - May 29, 2007 9:02 AM
@48
"This chick needs court ordered rehab and some nice jailtime full of bad food and shower sexual harrassment."
I agree and I have her cell in my basement waiting for her.
53. krazihottkelli - May 29, 2007 9:12 AM
someone pleaze kidnap
thiz bitch and teach
her a lezzon..
or at least run over
her with your car...
maybe that will open
her stoned eyez....
54. iamsosmart - May 29, 2007 9:18 AM
Her mother is a disgrace who raises such a horribly useless, dangerously stupid, little skank... oh wait... like mother like daughter, I guess.
Someone will be back in rehab in no time. What a loser, I understand (even though it isn't right) why someone drinks after going to war and seeing horrific shit or losing a spouse or child or something aweful like that but, what terrible sorrows does a spoiled rich brat have to drown in alchohol... the new Gucci bag was sold out?
FUCK THIS WHORE... actually don't.
55. krazihottkelli - May 29, 2007 9:20 AM
#23=marcof'npolo
Europe suckz, bitch
especially France...
so get off of my great
American website,azzhole!
56. Lohan Fan - May 29, 2007 9:25 AM
#54 You just dont understand the pressure of all the fake rumors and being watched all the time whatever you do.
57. krazihottkelli - May 29, 2007 9:31 AM
#56==then she needz to learn
how to stay the fuck home and
do her drugz and drinking there
like the rest of the damn country
doez...
all thiz bitch wantz is attention
did u forget, shez too young to drink, let on cocaine? shez such a lozer.
58. jen - May 29, 2007 9:32 AM
too bad she didn't fly out through the wind shield. that would have been something worth seeing. besides, those chest freckles are disgusting.
59. jakebarnes - May 29, 2007 9:32 AM
Chest injuries? I'll give her some physical therapy on that chest of hers.
I can't believe she got away with this though.
60. SisterSweetly - May 29, 2007 9:34 AM
I'm just thankful I had the foresight to have her as a last minute addition to my dead pool.
61. ringleader - May 29, 2007 9:37 AM
@56
She chose this life. she's the one who flashes her tits at every opportunity, says herself that she can't imagine her life if she wasn't being photographed, and leaves herself in some very compromising situations.
she is rich and spoiled. she has brought this on herself. if it was anyone else (not a celebrity) doing all the shit she does (like drinking underage EVERY NIGHT and no one's EVER SAID ANYTHING) they would have gone down ages ago.
oh yeah. blohan goes DOWWWWWN!!!
62. SisterSweetly - May 29, 2007 9:38 AM
And ANOTHER thing...she was found to have a USABLE amount of cocaine in her car, not UNusable.
63. MassGrrl - May 29, 2007 9:39 AM
Where is her mother/manager when she's out on cock binges (duh, I mean *coke* binges!) and falling down drunk?
Oh, right! She's cashing the 15% royalties checks from her daughter...
Sad.
64. keycard - May 29, 2007 9:41 AM
Looks like it was Nick LoPiccolo and Sam Ronson in the car with her the night of the crash, http://celebritystarpower.blogspot.com/2007/05/worst-news-of-week-in-review-may-20th.html
65. DahliaRose - May 29, 2007 9:43 AM
What does she have to do before someone gets killed. She has a driver, yet, she hops into her death machine looking for people to run over, all the while humming the Brad Paisley song -- "I'm a Celebrity and the rules don't apply to me."
66. Dina Lohan - May 29, 2007 9:45 AM
She wasn't drinking, she wasn't doing coke, she didn't wreck her car, and she wasn't in the hospital for injuries to her upper chest. She's just misunderstood. It's the media's fault this happened, they won't leave her alone. This isn't the "fun" part of the business. She called me and said "Mommy, the paparazzi made me crash". This is all just a big misunderstanding. Lindsay wasn't partying, she was researching a role for her next movie, it's about young Hollywood starlets out of control. She should win an Oscar for this role.
67. krazihottkelli - May 29, 2007 9:47 AM
hopefully she'll be locked
up while I'm down here
surfing...please God...
let her go to jail...
everyone pray!!!!
68. CocoPoundCake - May 29, 2007 9:50 AM
What do you expect from someone who is in a movie with Commie Jane Fonda?
69. lindsay rocks! - May 29, 2007 9:55 AM
You guys just don't get it. She's a target of the Republican Right Wing Conspiracy because she supports Hillary Clinton and she wants to bring home the troops from Iraq. Wake up. She was drugged and paraded in front of paparazzi to embarrass her and ruin her career.
70. HRManager - May 29, 2007 10:05 AM
Some people will do anything to add get another day off on a long weekend.
71. SisterSweetly - May 29, 2007 10:06 AM
http://x17online.com/celebrities/lindsay_lohan/x17_xclusive_the_real_lindsay_pix.php
More pics of her passed out two days AFTER the accident.
72. YouRang - May 29, 2007 10:11 AM
Can we get a count down clock for Paris' jail time to start?
73. captain obvious - May 29, 2007 10:18 AM
Its amazing this girl is still alive. Now its completly obvious how real that coke video was of her...what a coke whore. No wonder she looks 40 and used up; she'll be lucky if she even makes it to 40. Time to ease up on the booger sugar.
74. jus'stupid - May 29, 2007 10:26 AM
It's just to get attention. The media fuels the obsession with these burned out little whores. It's what happens when you give someone young, too much money all at once. Look at the football, and basketball players. Well, pro sports stars in general.
75. Quinn - May 29, 2007 10:27 AM
The fact that's she's nit in jail for possession, DUI and abandoning the scene of an accident is just one more reason why people in LA should abandon all obedience to the law and start rioting. this is bullshit.
76. asscrack - May 29, 2007 10:29 AM
What is the charge for leaving the scene of an accident. They have her on tape, useless!!
77. wedgeone - May 29, 2007 10:30 AM
#3 - "dumb punch"? Shouldn't that be "dumb bunch"? The "b" key is nowhere close to the "p" key on the keyboard. who feels dumb now?
#9 & 25- it was a "usable amount". Maybe Fish had a typo? Thank you #62.
And THANK YOU, Mr. Fish, for giving the props to all of the fans who kept your site going with this breaking news story while you were away getting ass reamed in the middle of Haiti, where the Internet foesn't exist.
Since I was the first blogger to break this story FOR you, and another 7 or 8 followed up, the LEAST that you could do is fork over some props to us.
You're worthless, dude.
78. krazihottkelli - May 29, 2007 10:30 AM
I'm an annoying cunt
who has nothing better to do
than come here 50 timez
and post stoopid commentz
Sum1 pleaze punch me
in the babymaker
79. igasmibuzz - May 29, 2007 10:31 AM
How many Lindsay Lohan is there ?
I feel like she does 10 HUGE mistakes a day !
80. SPF - May 29, 2007 10:31 AM
Moral of the story: Superfish aka Anti-Clown needs to hire some help, IOW an assistant writer who can work when he can't. Seems to me there's some creative commenters here, what's the hold up? Too cheap?
81. captain obvious - May 29, 2007 10:31 AM
YAAAAAAAAAAWN; Let's just do the E! true hollywood story and get it over w/ already.
82. wedgeone - May 29, 2007 10:32 AM
"Doesn't", not "foesn't". I correct my typo's.
83. Sheva - May 29, 2007 10:33 AM
Hate to think what could happen to her if she had gotten around to banging Willard Clinton.
Cuz Shrillery don't like when biyatches are bragging about it.
84. polypam - May 29, 2007 10:38 AM
God, she'll do anything to try to show up Paris.
85. KatieKates - May 29, 2007 10:39 AM
It is sick that this bitch isn't already in prison. ANYONE else would already have been booked, charged with possession, and headed for the state penitentiary. Any "usable" amount of cocaine found on her person should be reason enough to send her to the slammer for at least a year.
She is such a skank whore. I can't wait to see her go down.
86. dumbphuck - May 29, 2007 10:46 AM
wow that was really reckless. driving on coke and piss is pretty damn old school.
i wish there were stories about rachel bilson just sitting around being hot and possibly reading a book.
87. YouRang - May 29, 2007 10:47 AM
So Assuming that Paris has to be in jail as of 12:00 a.m, June 5, that would mean that she has 157 hours and 12 minutes till her sentence begins. Someone should really start a count down clock. It would be that ultimate "fuck you Paris."
88. schack - May 29, 2007 11:10 AM
somebody please give wedgeone a little validation for all his celebrity obsession - i mean, hard work. or shot him. either way. the whining is giving me a headache this morning.
89. Josh_Lavarn - May 29, 2007 11:14 AM
She probably could have run over a dozen preschoolers like Brandy and not be tossed in the slammer that night.
90. krazihottkelli - May 29, 2007 11:23 AM
SHEVA PRETENDING TO BE ME#78=BITCH
yea, I read the stupid shit you wrote on the Rosie/Elizabeth site...
you have been elected to be the official dickhead of this site...
my apologies to DrPlowShit!!!
91. Poopsy - May 29, 2007 11:26 AM
This is not exactly fresh news.
92. booga1134 - May 29, 2007 11:33 AM
I wouldn't use my shoe to step on Lindsays cunt, I'd step over it like its was a worn out mud puddle.
93. JOEY G. - May 29, 2007 11:41 AM
I would let her do a line on my cock.
94. vwgirl - May 29, 2007 11:44 AM
I think to say she should be shot in the head is a little ridiculous and most of people to rag on these celebs make worse choices in your own lives or probably know someone who may be dealing with the same problems. I think it's kinda sad to put wealthy, beautiful people down all the time, take it to the extreme (she should be shot in the head) when she's not a criminal. It's not in the constitution to shoot people for making poor decisions and it never will be. You're not a silly billy for not having much of a life other than to create this site. Nor is it journalistic in Any manor if that is what you think that you are.
95. surfergirls07 - May 29, 2007 11:51 AM
93==dude,she would too!
96. Courtney - May 29, 2007 11:53 AM
Aug. 24! That's my birthday! Awww.... someone up there loves me.
97. krazihottkelli - May 29, 2007 11:53 AM
I have to admit, I've done alot of yayo in my time but never anything this out of control. I also have slept with my fair share of meatheads but who cares. The thing that LILO and I have most in common is our vaginal stench and discharge. I tried to get rid of the stench by douching with a combination of vinegar, drano, pig intestines, raw sewage, my moms diarrhea, and colt 45 malt liquor. Believe it or not that concoction actually smells much better than what I normally reek of. Maybe it is because I am soooo fat but I also cannot see my lips because my from bush is in the way. The fro in my bush is actually kinda crusty and sticky because I cannot clean the discharge b/c of my fatness and it also smells horrendous because I wipe from the back to the front. I licked my Moms twat last night and I am a fat hooker.
98. meee - May 29, 2007 11:56 AM
what a fucking piece of shit. they better fucking charge her in this case.
99. krazihottkelli - May 29, 2007 11:56 AM
hey westvirginiagirl,
you have some of the
worst skankz in your
state than this site
does...actually, there
are worse whores in wv
than in here..so STFU..
if u don't like the
bashing, go watch
your sister get down
with all the unincorporated
town boyz in your little
world...silly billy,asshole.
100. Humming_Bird_Blu - May 29, 2007 12:01 PM
next thing you know, she's going to jail for 45 days, but police will discover her "good behavior" and shorten it to 23 days. and when she finally goes, she'll be there for six hours. and not inside a cell, she'll stand outside on the steps chewing gum and brushing her hair til it falls out...hey! that's not a bad idea.
101. krazihottkelli - May 29, 2007 12:01 PM
#97==your not so smart are U
my name always comez up blue,
ASSSHOLE!!!!
keep thinking you can fool people..
your not,,,this better not be mia..
probably that republica=shevaherdick.
102. krazihottkelli - May 29, 2007 12:19 PM
#97==yea, last time I
checked, I waz a virgin...
leave my mother out of it...mia
you are for sure the sickest
mind ever...
103. BarbadoSlim - May 29, 2007 12:22 PM
*yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawnnnnnn*
how about posting this days ago when we gave a shit.
104. Bern - May 29, 2007 12:23 PM
No way she goes to jail.
105. lambman - May 29, 2007 12:24 PM
well at least she didn't blame it on the jews, or call anybody sugar-tits. So there's an upside right?
106. techclerk - May 29, 2007 12:27 PM
I've seen it posted on this site before and I'll say it again...
THIS IS GOING TO BE THE BEST SUICIDE EVER!!!
107. sasha - May 29, 2007 12:30 PM
upper middle class is all ittakes to just get probation off that where i live it seems every kid is on probation all groups socioeconomic groups honor roll regular but same color so them getting off is nothing they get community service at least
108. Whammer Jammer - May 29, 2007 12:33 PM
Where is Dina? I want to hear her try to spin this in her skank daughter's favor. I wonder if she's proud of her now, like she said she was when she went into rehab the first time.
Come on out Dina, let's hear about how Lindsay is so misunderstood and how proud you are of her!!
Paging Dina Lohan, paging Dina Lohan, your liquored up daughter just crashed her Mercedes, paging Dina Lohan, paging Dina Lohan........
109. krazihottkelli - May 29, 2007 12:38 PM
So #97 is really Sheva=diarea=ha
don't cha just loved how she described
her puzzy and her diarea=ha and how
she wantz to have sex with her mama..
grozzassbitch..
110. lambman - May 29, 2007 12:44 PM
61- and others- I always find a hard time saying "she brought this on herself" about people like Lindsay. True she is 100% responsible for her actions the night she got her DUI, but really the whole situation is completely her parents fault. They pretty much sold their kid to Disney when she was 8. And as soon as she hit puberty they turned her out and got her into hooker clothes and introduced to all the wrong people. Its not really her fault considering how young she was when she got into this life style, she's only 20 and for the past 12 years she's been working in Hollywood and has parents with more than their fair share of problems...what do you expect of her?
111. Too Young For Fame - May 29, 2007 12:48 PM
Just wait. Lindsay will get time off for being a stool pidgeon in jail.
112. mia - May 29, 2007 12:54 PM
Kelli
I bet you're a 34 years old geek who live in is parents basement and masturbate while reading stories about coked celebrities. You play the pure virgin who seems upset about their bad behaviour but inside you'd like to give them a hard spanking as a punition.
113. Casey - May 29, 2007 12:55 PM
"I'm not entirely sure how she isn't in jail right now. Considering her driving and substance abuse record, the police could shoot her in the head and it'd be totally legal. It might even be written into the Constitution somewhere. I think near the bottom."
That actually made me smile. Or it would have if the post itself wasn't revolving around such a grotesque lack of justice in our system. How can anyone actually be proud to be American anymore? Great little post-Memorial Day present...reminding us just how fucked up our country really is.
114. tatianalensky - May 29, 2007 12:57 PM
no worries. Your comments are WORTH THE WAIT CAUSE THEY ARE FUCKING AWESOME.
115. tatianalensky - May 29, 2007 1:07 PM
#94
silly billy? manor? Thats like a house....a big house, you know? maybe you should get a thesaurus and a spell check. Or a brain might help.
Also: what do you get when you cross a Lohan with a pig? Nothing. There are some things even a pig won't do.
116. DevilishTenshi - May 29, 2007 1:10 PM
WHY WHY WHY is she not in jail anyways? She is underaged, fled the scene, & was found with illegal drugs. I DON'T UNDERSTAND?
117. Megan - May 29, 2007 1:24 PM
She's hot, has money, so with that comes special privelages. My dorm roommate said I had coke in the room, they found nothing, but still arrested me on the spot and took me straight to jail...most of the judges and police in cali do blow anyways, I know the lawyers do b/c mine did...
118. techclerk - May 29, 2007 1:48 PM
#110
fuck you because it is her own fault. You act like she has her parents pointing a gun at her head. Make up your mind. Is it 100% her fault or not? You can't have it both ways. Take away her parents, Hollywood, and Disney and what do you have left? A blacked out cokehead who will make ANOTHER false apology to her fans and lip service about taking full responsibility for her own actions.
119. wedgeone - May 29, 2007 2:04 PM
schack - get back to blowing Jimbo, OK? His wad exploding out of your nose ought to relieve your headache.
120. JMack - May 29, 2007 2:46 PM
good to see another overpriveleged hooker wreck yet another car that costs more than the average persons house.
hope she ends up sucking homeless people off in an ally somewhere.
121. schack - May 29, 2007 2:56 PM
so, wedgie, in your experience a penis should fit up a girl's nostril. that explains so much...
122. Aleja - May 29, 2007 3:06 PM
It is a shame she is a role model for some little girls. I wish her well.
It makes me wonder how many of you who have posted comments that are overly hurtful and hateful would act different if you were in that circle of people with so much money, fame and pressure around you. She is 20.
she needs to pull herself together but from what I read, a lot of you too!!
Your nasty responses after this posting will proof my point.
123. Best of Celeb - May 29, 2007 3:15 PM
Celebrity jail club.
124. Yourfairytale - May 29, 2007 3:53 PM
Apparently it's nice to be white and rich. First Paris and now Lindsay. If it had been anyone else, they'd be getting reamed up the ass in the jail showers. Stupid privileged bitches.
It is absolutely her own fault. My home life was screwed up but I didn't become a druggie or an alcoholic. These choices are purely her own.
What is it with these bitches? They have the best lives. They aren't abused, they don't have real problems...why the need for all the addictions? At least you can feel a bit sorry for someone who was beat up as a kid who grew up to be an alcoholic but not Lindsay.
125. wedgeone - May 29, 2007 3:58 PM
Schack - you have heard of milk coming out of your nose while in mid gulp when you start coughing or laughing, yes? Because a passage connects the nose to the throat.
The impact of the cumshot would force cum out your nose by going UP that passage.
We now understand why you troll Jimbo so much - your level of common sense (or lack thereof) explains so much.
126. lara - May 29, 2007 4:16 PM
The Superficial is not updated frequently enough! It is finals week, and this is my only forum for distractment. Please update more...this is addicting.
127. schack - May 29, 2007 4:22 PM
wedgie, thanks for the detailed explanation. as always I appreciate ready your lengthy comments where you zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
128. sweetnsnooty - May 29, 2007 4:27 PM
Another spoiled ripper whose ass should be in jail. I dislike this hoochie more and more each day. *barf*
129. sageashes - May 29, 2007 4:57 PM
Ok, I have to ask. What the fuck is with you people replacing all your s's with the letter 'z'? It makes you look fucking retarded.
130. Danie - May 29, 2007 5:17 PM
I really dont think when it comes to Lindsey Lohan there's such a thing as an unusable amount of drugs.. they should be happy she didnt have her usual varity with her... you know.. cocaine.. speed.. animal tranquilizers.. flinstone vitamins ..
131. cheffie - May 29, 2007 5:19 PM
#9 was merely trying to distinguish what an "unusable" amount of cocain could possibly be, COMPARED to the reported "usable" amount.
Dumbasses.
132. justifiable - May 29, 2007 5:49 PM
#129 That's krazihotkelli and she IS retarded (among other things too numerous and disgusting to mention here). And she's a virgin because she doesn't know any blind guys who've lost their sense of smell.
133. Hung Master - May 29, 2007 6:09 PM
So Lindsay was found to have cocaine, and operation under the influence (OUI). HMMM..makes you wonder if she will even get any jail time for this debacle. She could of killed someone that night, too bad she didn't kill herself. Hahahaha
134. Mocksie - May 29, 2007 6:28 PM
I really can't wait for the Lindsay Behind The Music. It's going to make that Leif Garret one look like a pile of puke.
135. techclerk - May 29, 2007 7:55 PM
#122
"Your nasty responses after this posting will proof my point."
No, not really. You weren't even making a point.
136. techclerk - May 29, 2007 8:18 PM
My little sister used to hit me and then cross her fingers thinking that makes her immune from me hitting her back. Most people outgrow that in elementary school.
137. xie - May 29, 2007 8:51 PM
thank you cheffie
138. Soph - May 29, 2007 10:32 PM
hey krazihottkelli i love you. you tell them hoes.
139. kittygoodness - May 29, 2007 10:48 PM
This one site said Ashley Olsen's cell number is 570-574-5641 . . . . i called it and the vm said this is ashley does ne one know if this is true or just a fake number ?? ? ?
140. krazihottkelli - May 29, 2007 11:04 PM
just got back from my beach
party and I see that alot of
people on here can go fuck
themselvez , except for #138...
if I like f'n zzzzzzzzzz, then
toughtitz, fuckerz!!!!
at least I'm not a whore, total
pure and will stay that way...
oh yea, mia, give up on the 35yr.old
guy, jacking off in his fatherz
basement...thatz not me..probably U.
all azzholez come to Florida to drown,
the rip currentz are waiting for U...
141. Other Olsen Twin - May 30, 2007 12:28 AM
#139-
Why would any sane person want to call Ashley Olsen?
142. Groonk - May 30, 2007 2:10 AM
the words 'inevitable' comes to mind.
143. Lou - May 30, 2007 12:36 PM
WTF I do not know what I hate more: hollywood skants or the justice system lettings these skants off easy.
Where the F is groups like M.A.D.D. they all have been quiet. These skants are getting off easy that is B.S.
144. Eelboy - May 30, 2007 3:36 PM
I think she should be made to perform before a bunch of horny fratboys by getting naked, coating herself from head to toe with Vaseline Jelly, and ride an inmflatable Oscar Myer Wiener until she reaches screaming ecstasy!
145. CompleteBreakfast - May 30, 2007 3:47 PM
krazihottkelli:
stop typin lyke thiz...
bcuz u sound lyke a retard...
and no1 givez a shit about...
ur postz
And it's quite obvious that you're a virgin, so there's really no need to clarify. I'm guessing that you're probably around the age of, oh, eleventeen or so. Please just take the time to finish out your remedial English classes before you post here again. You'd be doing us all a world of good.
Toodles
146. Ces - May 30, 2007 7:01 PM
I'll bet the photags ran her off the road and sprinkled candy all over. An adequite amount.
Boo! I smell a setup!
147. krazihottkelli - May 30, 2007 11:02 PM
145==whatz the matter
not gettin any?
mind your own businezz, bitch
I'll write any freakin way I
want too..last I checked our
king was still alive....so get
off of my azz, your not king!!!
148. feralscream - June 1, 2007 5:17 AM
The fact that any celebrity, especially a stupid bitch like Lohan here, can get a slap on the wrist for offenses that anyone else would get the book thrown at them for is such a travesty. How the fuck do these prosecutors and judges sleep at night knowing that they let dangerous fools like her or Paris off with minor penalties, knowing full well that they are only going to do it again? Like #6 said, there could have been someone standing where she wrecked. For fucks sake, the whole point of punishment is to keep someone from doing something that is wrong again. God, this whole damn world is in trouble. Excuse me all, I have to go paint up my "The End is Near" sandwich board so I can wear it on the nearest street corner.
149. Linsay Lohan Lover - June 3, 2007 4:22 PM
Linsay Lohan made BAD BAD choses!
150. Lilly - July 1, 2007 2:08 PM
Well, what can we say? It's not like we didn't see it coming. Does anyone know if she will end up in jail like Paris?? She probably will. Oh well, who really gives a crap, nobody likes her anyways! She has no talent these days...
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