May 18 2007Jessica Simpson gets dumped

Jessica Simpson and John Mayer have broken up after Mayer reportedly dumped her last weekend. Additionally, sources are claiming Jessica Simpson has turned her back on Operation Smile when she didn't attend their benefit the other night.
"She's turned her back on them," the spy said. "She got a lot of good publicity from the charity but refused to let pictures of her be in the commemorative book and hasn't done anything with them in a year."
I don't care about either of these stories, I just wanted to post this picture of Jessica Simpson at Cannes with her super lopsided breasts. If it were anybody except John Mayer I'd understand why he dumped her. Except it is John Mayer. So I don't. When you look the way he does, you should be thankful if you manage to get a date with a store mannequin. Or a telephone book with a mouth drawn on in lipstick.

Reader Comments
1. leelee - May 18, 2007 11:53 AM
awwwwww
2. leelee - May 18, 2007 11:54 AM
... i'm talking about the lopsided breast of course. How Sad!
3. Jimbo ∞ - May 18, 2007 11:55 AM
At least these are better boobs than the last post
4. td - May 18, 2007 11:57 AM
He dumped her cause she's too damn tan.
5. Fifth Stooge - May 18, 2007 11:58 AM
Hey Jessica, you have snu on your shoulder.
Snu? What's snu?
Nothing, what's snu with you?
6. It's Me Fuckers - May 18, 2007 12:00 PM
hahahahaha, I wonder if she regrets getting rid of nick... at least he wasn't too bad looking and look at the pussy he's getting now! I guess she's gonna have to go back to daddy's bed for a while...
7. FRIST!!! - May 18, 2007 12:02 PM
Well I think John Mayer is adorable. Wish he'd come over and mow my lawn. Maybe trim my hedges...heh heh.
8. flavio - May 18, 2007 12:03 PM
She looks beautiful in this picture... quite opposite from the previous ones.
9. Anexio - May 18, 2007 12:04 PM
Nice teats.
10. Parrish - May 18, 2007 12:06 PM
lonely lonely girl
11. klove - May 18, 2007 12:08 PM
Well, i've been on this site for a year and it makes me laugh every day. But this one had me laughing so hard i was crying so I'm leaving my first comment!! Whoever you are that writes these....good job!!! You're freakin hilarious!!
Does anyone think she regrets leaving Nick?
12. Wisp - May 18, 2007 12:10 PM
I don't like John or Jessica, but I'm actually almost sad for them.
13. veggi - May 18, 2007 12:11 PM
I want some of those furry slippers.
14. raven - May 18, 2007 12:11 PM
she looks so much betrter in this pic.
15. techclerk - May 18, 2007 12:11 PM
If I wanted to hear somebody sing John Cougar Mellencamp songs, I'd listen to the originals because John gets the words to his songs right.
16. captain obvious - May 18, 2007 12:12 PM
I saw it comin', it was really obvious because she was trampin' it up out on the town alot lately, and looking real insecure. Either she had already been dumped and was doing an "I'll show him! Look at what you're missing out on! I'm hot and people want me!Now you'll regret it!" or she knew she was about to get canned so she was desperately trying to do a "look at me, I'm so hot, so many people want me, you better not dump me or you'll be sorry"...jeez, I know way too much abt these situations, I should just shut up already. Anyways, it was bound to fail, it was purely a rebound relationship for her.
17. Chauncey Gardner - May 18, 2007 12:12 PM
I'm still sort of digging Dark Jessica. I'd like to give her some snorkel lessons.
18. YOUNGONE - May 18, 2007 12:13 PM
Jessica, your rebound boytoy is right here. When I mean rebound, I mean I just wanna play with your lopsidded boobies.
19. Carpediem - May 18, 2007 12:16 PM
John Mayer can play guitar like nobody else. He's no brad pitt, but who cares? His music rules and that's what counts. At least he's not fake like this hollywood whore.
20. bungoone - May 18, 2007 12:16 PM
if she was insecure before, i'm afraid to see what she's going to do now getting dumped by that thing. get ready for Operation Trout Pout, Take 2. this is going to be a disaster, i can't wait!
21. Ambrse311 - May 18, 2007 12:24 PM
Does anyone else notice that when she smiles really big her top lip sucks in and she looks like a donkey? WILBUR...ppppffff!!??
22. Jimbo ∞ - May 18, 2007 12:25 PM
@21 no, my eyes never make it up that high
23. bungoone - May 18, 2007 12:33 PM
No, Slash can play the guitar. John is just a giant pussy.
He dated this "fake hollywood whore" so explain that? He's not fake, so clearly it was for her intelligence, right?
24. Ambrse311 - May 18, 2007 12:35 PM
Try Jimbo Try...not so much in this picture..and really it's her skin above her lip that sucks in, not so much her lip... I've never seen anything like it!
25. Cypress - May 18, 2007 12:35 PM
She got dumped? I thought she made dumps in .. well you know.. maybe that is why nobody wants her. She's not house-broken.
26. TheDarkLady - May 18, 2007 12:49 PM
From what I understand, it's well known in LA that John is HEAVILY into watersports.
So, Jessica is dumb, lets her dad take pervy pics, and likes to be peed on.
Such an attractive, classy lady.
27. Don Mega - May 18, 2007 12:58 PM
Nice rack :P~
28. honeycomb'sbig_yeahyeahyeah! - May 18, 2007 1:03 PM
Operation Smile!?? Is she also a member of Sparkle Motion???
29. DrPhowstus - May 18, 2007 1:07 PM
I'd take a dump on her.
30. ANGEE - May 18, 2007 1:12 PM
I think she has a nice smile...I think Jessica is crazy hot, and I thought her and John was good together. When you have a nice face---then its hard to look bad. Don't understand why everyone hates on Jessica.
31. sweetnsnooty - May 18, 2007 1:18 PM
Cut off the head and it would be a perfect package. Papa Simpson takes good care of the twins.
32. Ambrse311 - May 18, 2007 1:31 PM
I think she's very attractive, body and face. I just don't like when she smiles really cheesy and big, her skin above her lip sucks in and she looks like a horse or something. And I can't watch her sing, it looks like her mouth is going to open up and the top of her head is going to fall back like a pez dispenser. Boy does she make some strange faces...when she sings.
33. elle - May 18, 2007 1:33 PM
her boobs are only lop-sided cos one of her shoulders is up. but my my look at those shoulders. arnold schwartzenegger would be proud to have them in place of his own.
34. surfergirls07 - May 18, 2007 2:15 PM
thank God shes away from that old man,
he was making her fat and ugly..
35. Whammer Jammer - May 18, 2007 2:38 PM
#32: When does she sing?
36. wedgeone - May 18, 2007 2:51 PM
Now she'll have to find another guy to pop her in the pooper so hard she sprays diarrhea all over the bedsheets.
http://vipglamour.net/Celebrity/blind-item
37. fifi - May 18, 2007 3:05 PM
I knew it was coming! They tried hard to convince us that they had some type of connection, but i DIDN'T FALL FOR IT! I guess that she saw how happy nick was, and she thought ok, maybe I'll try to out do him, but it backfired! SORRY SHIT OUT OF LUCK< GO BACK TO DADDY! MESSICA SIMPSON!
38. dede - May 18, 2007 3:21 PM
I used to think Jessica was so beautiful and natural now shes just a dumb hollywood skank who got surgery to look good. Look at her old pic before she so ugly at the celeb surgery site...
http://www.HollywoodPlastic.com
Man dude look like she got downsyndrome yuck.
39. fatty - May 18, 2007 4:23 PM
LISTEN. IT MUST BE SOMETHNG WRONG WITH HER PERSONALITY. Because she can't keep a man. It may be that her loving aint so good either. On top of that, dude is an ug mug. he isnt cute at all. Where do he get off dumping anyone? She just need to get a nose job, and look more natrual. And maybe go to school or something, because i am starting to feel sorry for her.
40. sharpie - May 18, 2007 4:48 PM
@28 operation smile is a charity that gives money to poor children/families who otherwise couldn't afford surgery for facial deformities... although it is quite likely that she also mistook it for sparkle motion... i can just imagine her showing up at a hospital in legwarmers and a leotard (3 sizes too small, of course)and calling her agent in confusion, demanding to know why they've cast such ugly children to be her back-up dancers
41. penis - May 18, 2007 6:02 PM
Yeah so John is a nice jewish boy....surely he can't be too serious about this moronic preacher's daughter....and I bet she has no nautural rhythm either....LMFAO
42. NicotineEyePatch - May 18, 2007 6:59 PM
That's what happens when you give a musician shitdick. It's all about the anal douchery with those guys.
43. getyourhandoutofmycat - May 18, 2007 7:48 PM
I can't blame him....i'd have gotten sick of having to share with papa joe too
44. Gossip Girl - May 18, 2007 8:36 PM
Lopsided is an understatement! I wouldn't be surprised if those things threw the earth's rotation of axis.
www.GossipFeast.com
45. cassimus - May 18, 2007 8:57 PM
Whatever, John Mayer's fucking sexy.
46. shexy - May 18, 2007 11:31 PM
JOHN MAYER'S HOT. and jessica's too dumb for him anyway.
47. krazihottkelli - May 19, 2007 4:47 AM
Dude, she lookz so much
better already since the
old shit is outta her life.
and she also lookz 1,000
timez better than Spearz.
48. Melaney - May 19, 2007 1:19 PM
I'm wondering how many of you are bashing her, look better, have more money and fame, and are as successful as she is.
49. brianna - May 19, 2007 1:35 PM
What a bitch... now that shes not in the media as much anymore, shes turning her back on a charity. I wish someone would bitch slap this cunt!!
50. HotDogger - May 19, 2007 9:37 PM
I'd still allow her the honour of eating corn out of my pooper.
51. footmaster - May 20, 2007 6:39 AM
the moderator of this forum is toetally underestimating the power of the guitar and the voice...a dude as ugly as me got laid at 14 by the still one of the prettiest girls i have ever seen and she was 16...all i had to do was play, "when the children cry" by lame ass "white lion". it's amaaaazing.
52. mrs_primevil - May 20, 2007 12:35 PM
I can only imagine the kind of conversations the 2 of them had. It had to be comical!
53. krazihottkelli - May 20, 2007 8:14 PM
#29==I'm sure U would!!!
54. NicotineEyePatch - May 21, 2007 6:13 AM
Hey, Melaney, #48, I wonder who on this board really cares about all that shit.
I believe you missed the exit to www.celebritiesareinfallible.org ---->
55. Clad de Concarneau - May 21, 2007 6:49 AM
Bweeeeeuu. I fuckin' hate that plastic-doll...She's just awful!
56. jenster - May 21, 2007 8:41 AM
thank god ive been waiting for this, seriously what do these two talk about?
Mayer's head s up his own ass b/c he thinks he s the next Bono fr fucks sakes, and Jessica cant count past 12 I think it goes something like this:
John: Oh wow, I'm really touched by all this world hunger, I'm gonna write a song about it
im so deep and awesome, I love me, I do stand up.
Jessica:......I'm deep TOO ya know, I like, um,care about mexcans and stuff...um yeah orphans that are mexican.....I give them mini
vans sometimes, and um.....
57. techmambo - May 21, 2007 6:51 PM
Great post
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58. aurélie - May 22, 2007 5:09 AM
what the fuck is wrong with her?she really got a problem with her boobs like clad said before she is awful....no more than awful what she is can t be describe;in fact there's nothing in the world we could compare her to
59. tr - May 22, 2007 6:57 AM
JEW BOY DUMBS BIMBO
oy'
60. GGblum - May 22, 2007 8:14 AM
shes cute and john mayer is an awesome artist. Why all the hate??
61. mike - May 22, 2007 10:03 AM
Wonder how many STD's they shared during
the relationship????
62. digitaler bilderrahmen - December 29, 2009 11:08 PM
I like Jessica, and I like Billy, but I don’t feel they work together. They both need different things, and Jessica needs heavy commitment. Once again she’s looking in all the wrong places for boyfriends.