May 16 2007Jessica Alba poses in GQ

My spooge runs thick and frothy for her...

Jizm.

Did she loose some weight? She seems totally skinny on these pictures... :\

how does spilling water out of her mouth makes her look sexy? a toddler does it and they get 'oh! - bobby NOT AGAIN' Precisely.

I always suspected she was too dumb to know how to drink. Hot though. Red hot.

So they've gone for oral fixation with a twist of beastiality? Works for me.

Maxim is wrong... JA is #1....

She needs to eat. Goddamn, why do we reward everyone for becoming nothing but fucking skin and bones?

I've got something that will make her drool.

Want to touch the heiny.........

Maybe it's just the simulated watersport (or cum-shot, I cant' tell), but she's looks like Kim Kardashian here.

what the...

this is just weird. plain weird.

someone feed her something. now!

Fergie was #10. That's more disturbing to me. It's like the editors opened up a tabloid and picked the first 10 celebrities they saw.

I like to envision her dribbling my jizz down her chin.

Too much botox and she can't move her mouth anymore?

Seriously, what happened to her body? Where did all those ribs come from? I don't get Hollywood. Women like Julia Roberts (Mystic Pizza), Cameron Diaz (The Mask), Jessica Alba (Dark Angel, Fantastic Four), Kate Bosworth, (Blue Crush) all get famous for having hot curvey bodies, then once they are famous for some reason think their hot Curvey bodies are ugly and diet themselves into skeletons.

What happens? Do they all Hire Rachel Zoe to be their stylist or something?!

someone give her a donut and a bib, please. i think these are the least attractive photos of her i have seen to date. ick.

What the hell? This is like the worst photoshoot ever. Whoever chose these poses she'd be fired immediately. Also what the hell is happening to Jessica? She's always been the one celebrity that wasnt starving herself and was a healthy beautiful weight. Say it aint so Jessica.

Let us all pray for the survival of Jessica Beil's booty, for Alba apparently lost all her slutacious curves.

She usually looks good (apart from that strange fantastic four monkey looking promo) but this just reminds me of the retarded guy who used to steal our lunches in kindegarten and had a permanent wet shirt from his drool....he'd also flash his weenie at us....good times....now if only she was imitating that part too...

... How the Hell is Lohan hotter than that? Dear God, I almost started crying knowing that I would never in my life ever again see anything so beautiful. I was as if eternity itself shown through the pictures... and it gave me a raging hard boner.

Did you guys go through the slideshow? She's thinner, but still looks pretty damn good.

not as good as me. but then again, i can say that because none of you can see me. hahahaha! i won!

#18 You want Jess to flash her weenie at you? OK, I'm not a doctor (except when I can get my wife in a nurse's uniform) but girls don't have weenies (unless its Fergie). Stop masturbating or you'll end up in a mental ward with Michael Moore. And we know what will happen THEN! Totally hilarious!

LOL the one of her gnawing on the rose is pretty funny... I mean, I get the whole oral fixation bit, but LOL, she's inhaling that thing...

Click on the slideshow. Huge head, little tiny body, big shoes; she looks like a Bratz doll.

May I ask a question?

Sure. what is it.

An interrogative statement used to test knowledge, but that is unimportant now. Does Jessica have a drinking problem?

She lets people to tell her to spit up on herself and take pictures of her in which she looks like a hooker, yet somehow she still believes that she gets cast in movies due to acting ability ... amazing.

#8 I don't know. I lost 5 pounds and I didn't get shit!!!

@26 1) Excellent point 2) Dumb fake giant tit shot on your website

she's got a manface going on in that picure. i bet she's waiting to get her gender reassignment surgery. i just read about these transgenders in Newsweek. very interesting stuff.

Damn, she looks like a drooling tard!

I don't get it. She has a great body and an OK face. But acting?

Next!

Damn I have to agree that this is probably the worst photo op I have EVER seen. I know its suppose to be a simulated porn chic and they figure our perverted,little, pea-brain selves are suppose to be thinkin',
"Thats her spitting out jiz!!" It totally backfired IMO.

shez hott.....

#22 Pink has a weenie, too.

This picture is just strange...
Even if Usher was doing this for a photo shoot I would think it was strange too...

#8 it's ok honey, I'm sure there's someone out there who likes fat chicks like you

Is that Sanjaya?

This picture just looks stupid. The water dribbling down her isn't hot. It's stupid looking and weird. Maybe if she wasn't staring dead into the camera lens like "Is this how I'm supposed to do it?" and holding up a water bottle.

I look like a tranny today :(

Terry Richardson photoshoot. Explains everything, really. Because there's a man who loves fluids.

I am NOT a fan of this chick, but I will admit she normally like 100 times hotter than in these crappy pics. Did you see the cover? She looks like a concentration camp survivor with a broken arm. You can see her ribs and the proportions now make her shoulder look huge.

either way she bores me to tears

the photography is terrible. the indoor shots look like they are taken with a disposable camera. has this guy heard of soft light? hard light never looks good, even on ms. alba.

I agree w/#10, she's definitely looking watersporty. But she's a cut above Kim because she only lets white guys pee on her.

I expected "Oliver Sacks" to explain the stroke victim look...

Wow, she is so completely unsexy. She isn't even hot with jizzle-drizzle running out of her fucked mouth.

@#39 Nothing wrong with that :)

Her ribs poking thru remind me of what I always hear when I take my dog to the vet...you should be able to feel his ribs and see them alittle for him to be at a healthy weight. Albeit, I don't think that applies to humans. Ha, maybe Alba's been going to the wrong type of doctor since someone called her a dog. I did hear before that she once suffered from an eating disorder...it looks like she's suffering again. Those ribs, pointy ass shoulders, little boobs...not an ounce of fat on her. I just don't see how that's sexy. She looked so much better when she had alittle meat on her (no jokes, guys). And that picture! I suppose it's suppose to be "sexy" and they are making innuendoes to oral sex. What is this, a Hustler spread?! I remember when I read that she constantly turns down certain roles (espc w/ nudity) because her dad wouldn't approve of it. Well, honey thats the only reason you're famous. It sure ain't for your acting chops. Her body reminds me of a skinnier version of when Britney was buff. Ok, sorry for the long post; went on a wild tangent there.

I don't get the water running out of the mouth thing at all. Not sexy in any way. Just gross! And for God sake someone wax her unibrows! Horrible. They did a great job of taking a hot chick and making her fugly.

Sanjaya lost a lot of weight didn't he?

Unflattering swimsuit: $480
Piece of bubble gum: $0.25
Drooling like an idiot in a popular magazine: Priceless

They squished her head! It looks absolutely ridiculous and un-natural.. Over the top photoshopped.

What a tool.

I'm sure her mother is proud.

Looks like she had too much novocaine.

I want to lick her spleen SO badly....

#47. capt.obvious.
Good points.

Doesn't help when Terry Richardson is taking the photos.. He's a little like Michael Jackson, if you know what I mean.... hint hint.

OMG! Did someone say she's TOO skinny?!?!?? Not an OUNCE of fat??!?! LMAO. Christ, maybe two of her ribs are showing, but she's still got a majorly round tummy and can't you people see how WIDE her hips/saddlebag thighs/ass is? Since when is being a fatass attractive? Or have the rules changed? Am I on the wrong site? Thank Jesus she's slimmed down a bit, she needed to. Those pix of her in the white suit are probably some of the most UNFLATTERING photos I've ever seen of any celeb. I feel bad for her. She's fine in the others, but the white suit is just wrong.

God bless America - where you can be a shitty actress, marginally hot, but drool all over yourself in a tight tee and still be considered spank-worthy.

I don't care if she is thinny, it's just i wouldn't like to be in her situation about always fighthing with your weight, eating just salad, bagel etc...just give her sometimes to get older and she will take her weight again! it's like teens, it's just a bad period! and I'm agree with the others who said that she was looking much better with fat on her bones!

I think she looks pretty damn good, but that ugly-ass $500 swimsuit they're trying to sell doesn't. And yeah, I'm sure they're going for "sexy" with the drool shot ('cause chicks that drool are hot, everybody knows this, that's why Britney is such a sensation and Lohan is the hottest woman in the world) but it mostly says "Oopsie, must remember to press lips together while swallowing next time." Or possibly, "No, you can't have any of my water, even though I don't really need it anyway, and just to prove it, I'm gonna let most of it come right back out of my mouth, just for funsies."

#56, you go to anorexic group meetings to pick up dates dont you?

she looks like a retard learning to drink without a straw for the first time

Eat some food!

Oh wait it's Terry Richardson. Now it all makes sense. As in, I realize why it's so god damned lame.

How is it even possible that The_Squizz hasn't logged on to say she smells like piss?

That water thing is very strange

and when did Jessica stop eating?

Who the hell is the photographer? Almost all the photos make her look terrible. Her face looks so stupid. And the whole layout of the photo is crap. Why the hell would you make her drool?

I agree with all of you!!!!! she do not look sexy at all! This picture sucks, and She does need to gain major weight! TOO HARD LOOKING!

Finally, a picture that demonstrates the dialtone going on in her brain...

Are you all frickin' nuts? She looks fabulous. I admit, the water dripping down her chin looks a little stupid, but the rest of the photos are great.

If I had a body like that, I'd walk around naked continuously...they could arrest me and everything and I'd say it was part of my religion or something to go naked.

Let's face it, Maxim is a shitty magazine to begin with and the only reason they would do this is so people would actually give a damn about the thing in the first place. It's a nice garner for attention because it seems to have paid off.

Unfortunately, their credibility seems to have gone out the window with this one as well.

But that's like suggesting they had any to begin with.

Fuck, wrong article..

um.., sexy rib cage?

Terry Richardson really needs to stop taking pictures. He portrays all women like they're 2 seconds away from getting raped. Does anyone remember his show from two years ago; the one where he convinced us (and all these barely legal art school chicks) that pictures of him getting blow jobs qualified as art?

Wow. She even looks hot when she'd drooling and starved and making a Terry Schaivo face.

Beautiful as she is, she really doesn't make a very good model. Magazines should stick to using models as models. And why is GQ doing a layout on women's clothes anyway?

Oh I get it...the water bottle is supposed to be a peen and the water is supposed to be cum...wow! so original...so hot...

It's a terry richardson shoot. That guy is a certified freak-pervert.

bitch is fug. don't get the big dealio

ok, can ANYONE honestly say they find the pic of her gnawing on the rose hot? she looks frickin scary and just fug! her stomach has always been bulgy and really weirdly shaped...she was hottest in dark angel.

HAHAHA
bitch DOES look like a stroke victim.. or just plain retarded as fuck

well send grandma right over cause i just might... you know... it's so wrong, but feels so right. Oh, oh, oh... i can't... stop... cumming... drat, dribbled on my keyboard again.

drooling water, if i was from say, croatia, and didn't know who this Jessica was, i'd be like "hmmm.... i wonder why this pervert would put a bikini on their retarded family member like that,

just a though.

I always thought if anyone could look sexy dry-humping a dog and drooling it would be Jessica, but sadly I am proven wrong.

She looks alright in the D&G swimsuit though.

Bitch is so stupid, she forgot to swallow!

Or else the water ran away from her fugliness, and she was too sad to stop it.

Oh I get it! Victor made her drink her douche water...

ack!!! how could she have agreed to do this?

OK - she is very cute - but if she's doing these poses, why not just pose in Playboy? The whole "I'm too good to pose in PB" is bullshit!!!!! WTF is she doing here that's different? Idiot with tits. Oh yeah, that's me!!

OK - she is very cute - but if she's doing these poses, why not just pose in Playboy? The whole "I'm too good to pose in PB" is bullshit!!!!! WTF is she doing here that's different? Idiot with tits. Oh yeah, that's me!!

this girl is ugly
she looks nothing like a guy
where o where are my little
English lads
oh where, oh where,
can they be?

She's hot but whoever came out with that dumb idea with the water running out of her mouth ought to be shot, dumb.

This is chick is crazy! one minute shes suing Playboy for putting her on the cover in a bikini because shes "not trying to portray that image anymore" YET, shes in a bikini once again... DUMBA$$!

Disgusting. Her ribs are practically breaking through her skin, she has NO tits, and her eyebrows look like squished caterpillers. Yeah thats really hot. I thought guys liked curves? Well if not then next time I wanna pick up a guy, I'll dress up as a concentration camp survivor and drool water out of my mouth like a retard.

Jessica Alba hot?? you must me kiding right? even in a "sexy" photoshoot for GQ magazine she's unable to look hot. Maybe she looked hot in the movie Sin City with all the makeup/stylists/ass showing and shaking etc but that's all. There's nothing hot about Jessica Alba.

Fuck, she ain't even cute. And what a fucking stick. You know there's something wrong with a woman's body when her boobs, waist and hips are equally as wide. Hot bodies usually look like this )(, Jessica Alba's body is like a 12 year old boy's ||. Yuck, and that scary face. Seriously Superfish, how the fuck can you say this chick is hot!? OVERRATED - YES, A LOT. HOT? - NO, NOT AT ALL.

She looks like a latino Teri Hatcher.

eewwww.yuck.

Dude what the hell? Alba is SOOOO FUGLY!!!! She looks like an anorexic alien!!! Her nose looks different again. Did she get another NOSE JOB? PROOF

check out this celeb plastic surgery site with her old nose shes ugly now.

http://www.HollywoodPlastic.com

ewww what an ugly pic! She looks cracked out.

Oh and I love how she says how people need to get past her hotness and start taking her seriously. Ok, I guess she's gotten her wish since she looks fucking fugly as shit now.

everyone always says i look just like her. so whenever i see posts of her of this site I get happy. I'm like. Look! It's My Twin! ♥

I like showing pictures of me and her to my boyfriend and having him figure out which one is me and which one is her. :].. he gets it mixed up a lot.

Wow Nicky, I'm sure you look JUST like her. Post a picture and we'll be the judge.

WOW SHES GONE DOWNHILL BIG TIME IN THE HOT STAKES...wow dumb and anorexic