Mar 21 2007Pete Doherty was is a crack whore

First

Is that poo on his hand?

Uh guys? I don't think "old queens" means women...

By 'queens' I would have assumed gay men rather than women?

The British justice system is more screwed up than the USA's. This moron keeps doing more and more drugs and the British courts just keep slapping him on the wrist and sending him on his way after he gets arrested. Maybe Wacko Jacko should move to England, he could molest all the little boys he wants and the courts would probably award him a fucking medal for it.

Um, yeah. Ditto the "queens" remarks. He's talking about dudes.

Boy George wannabe

I’m pretty sure you’re right #4. Not that it matters, he's such a complete and total clusterfuck, the fact that he's still breathing must have something to do with divine intervention.

He means he banged angry men.

Yeah...I'm pretty sure old queens does mean old gay dudes. Nice interpretation there, guys. Although knowing this story, I'm sure he wouldn't have turned an old female queen down for 20 quid either.

hahaha. A "fucking metal".

"Pissed-up old queens"?

WTF?

So what's the difference between them and "Pissed-down" ones?

Wait. Is this a picture of Pete Doherty or Boy George???

"What kind of sad sad women are paying Pete Doherty for sex?"

Dude He's not talking about women "Pissed Up Old Queens" translates into "drunknen, ageing gay men".

Hang on a bit, you were being sarcastic, I'm a dumb-dumb.

Ciao Fer Now

-Richard Bacchus

Um, I think he meant gay men paid him money. Women are not referred to as "Queens". But dudes in drag are.

anyone notice he is doing the same pose as the "who is the sexiest vegetarian alive?"

The idea of swishing your tongue around those greenish teeth is enough to melt the heart of any old queen.

"pissed up" in Britain means being really drunk....not angry like it does in the US. also queens does mean guys!

pete docherty is the scum of the earth!

The english legal system is messed up....move to Scotland...!

Who would pay 20 quid to assfuck this petri dish, I mean other than #1?

Old News

That looks like one of his "queens" sunglasses, Elton John.

JIIMBO! where's my sammich??

Pete guess what, YOU, have Aids, not HIV but FULL blown Aids, fuuuuuuuuull blown aiiiiids not hiv, but fuuuuuuulll blooooown aiiiiids!!!!!

For a while I quit listening to Soul Coughing because I mistakenly thought that Pete Doherty was their lead man. Once I realized my mistake, I could enjoy the music again. Now I just wish this piece of shit would die. soon.

@24 -- I'm not sure if his brain has been told the rest of his body is already starting to decompose.

I'd pay good money to watch Pete get freaky with #19.

...of course, I would be paying Pete upon request of #19 because...we ALL know the only way #19 gets any action is by upfront payment.

And I wouldn't be watching, I'd be hiding in fear.

I was wondering what happened to you Veggie. You stood me up last night. I had my luffa and was ready to go

@26 -- Ewwwwwwww... I didn't know you ghetto girls liked watching the undead rape extremely attractive men. That's just fucking gross. Are you drinking Alize so goddamn early?

I have to admit, I appreciate this guys honesty about who he is and what he does. Like him or not, it is a lot better than all the celebutards who lie about everything, "What? You think I breathe air???!!! How dare you???!!!"
Anyways, I think The Libertines are totally awesome. Unfortunately, I don't think Pete will even make it to his 30th birthday.

whhhheeeeeeeeeeeeee! Ribs and luffas!

By 'Queen'- he meant Elizabeth Windsor.
She's still big over there.
'Queens' - He also apparently dated a few of Freddy Mercury's ex band mates.

WHere are we going for lunch today?

@28.

I didn't know whitebread jolly boys liked to give all their lunch money away to "the walking dead" so they'd get a good rectal cleansing.

Oh wait...I did know that!

What's Alize? Sound's like some disease you contracted from Petey.

@33 -- Seriously sweetie, and be honest here, how many men have literally fallen asleep while fucking you? You're making me fall asleep here.

I was thinking some chicken, maybe some sex, you know, see what happens :)

Just tell me where and when!!!:)

@34.

Shouldn't you be asking your mother that same question?

Maybe then she'd be able to count all the drunks that have been inside her so she can have an official number to go to The Maury Show with.

If you're falling asleep, look in a mirror. I'm sure the sight of your fugliness will wake ya right up!

Not an inch of surprise here.
Is this really newsworthy?
I thought we all assumed he was a crackwhore.

38- we know. That's when it turns into the Dr. schoolin' Danyell and Jiimbo and I talking about showering together.

So we've all established "queen" is a term used instead of old gay man. Grrreat. Now as for the comment on the UK justice system. How is it that American "celebrities" such as Hilton & Barton can be photographed smoking dope or with it in their bags but they are never busted. What more proof do the US authorities want. Oh yeah... they're not working class or immigrants (Whoops, silly me, SORRY)

wow thats sad

@18

Move to Scotland my aas, keep this cokehead shite in England where it belongs!

I love Pete Doherty. He makes me want to shoot heroin, smoke crack and fuck forever...

Showering, Lunch, Sex, peral neckleses, you are driving me crazy. Where are you? I can take this much longer:)

UGH, he looks so DISEASED...probably has lesions all over his pale thin body. PUKE!

Oh superfish, your empire is crumbling...

Fucking for drugs...a very win-win venture. He's got business savvy.

Oh for the love of god!

Would Jimmy and Vegetarian pahleeese get a fucking room? This isn't match.com.

Turds.

@48 -- With you here, it's apparently snatch.com. Wooo.....my ribs, my ribs. So I guess that mean they all for right asleep, huh? Fucking Ambien pussy here I tell ya.

Before you respond, I'll let my fugly crackwhore grandma know that blowing sailors during Fleet Week isn't the best idea especially since her casper skin is virtually indistinguishable from your semen.

Lame.

What an ugly idiot.

cheers Doctor!

@49.

And with you here, it's OBVIOUSLY www.uscis.gov. You're not funny dear. Maybe the people back on your planet think so but...not here.

Tell me dear, why are you so fucking lame as to follow every single thing that I post and write a response that equals that of a bag of 15 year old shit? You obviously are living in the stone age and can't tell the difference between your ass and your head.

Why don't you do yourself a favor and slam your head against a brick wall for a coupla hours, well...atleast until you loose enough blood to die. Kay?

What I love about Pete: He is so blatent about everything he does, he doesn't try to hide anything. I think that's great. We could all learn a lesson from Mr. Doherty. Eh...he'll be dead soon

I don't get it. What is wrong with trading sex for drugs? And I also don't get why people, the same people, come to this site every single day just to bash each other. Maybe if you all shot a little heroin or smoked a little crack once in a while, you wouldn't be so hostile. Works for me!!!

Okay--now class, pay attention...you'll note that DanYELL's post in #52 has some critical errors.....the use of Dear twice doesn't deliver twice the dose of sarcsam; instead it detracts from the intended sarcastic punch. Also, using the body part of head shows a lack of originality and may lead the reader to believe that the author ran out of ideas. It is safe to conclude that this post is unfunny.

#52 Because you're ponderous and boring, how's that? Just keep on trying to be "first" and wondering who has poo on their hands (how apt that's #2!) and shut up in between.

@ #7
Poor man's Boy George.

#24 Soul Coughing is awesome. How did you confuse Mike Doughty for Pete Doherty though? Similar last names.
When I read stories like this I just think it;s sad more than anything. Legal system needs to get this guy off the streets and get him some help because he's a junkie who breaks the law all the time. He needs help and having sex with Kate moss is not helping enough.

I'd do him.

@59.

You'd also do your mother but...did ya really need to sign in as me as a disguise?

So sad.

@55.

There are several *critical* errors on your birth certificate as well. Like:

-Birth

...get lost fuckturd.

@56.

.......

Pulled out a Crackpipe DURING the interview?!

LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh God, this one just gets more and more fun to watch. I can't wait til Kate gives birth to his two headed, flippered baby.

danielle, in this time of critical energy needs, our Management, in an effort to try to conserve resources, has determined that your typing space:humor quotient is disturbingly one sided. It is our feeling here at The Superficial that you must either a) respond in a more humorous fashion or b) reduce the empty spaces used in your response window. We do not wish to charge you for the space you are currently using but will be forced to unless we see an improvement in your performance.
Thank you.
The Superficial
P.S. You need not comment back, it is taken as a given that it will not be funny.

Hello maxi.

Queen in the UK is the old lady who dresses in rich designers and lives in Buckinham Palace in London. She also gets to wear the crown covered in rubies, diamonds and anything else expensive! She's very royal and loves cups of tea. In London, they sell PG tea bags covered in Swarovski chystals for £7,000 (not joking)!
What does Queen mean in US?

This prick is so desperate to be seen as the next Keith Richards or Shane Macgowan he acts like a fucking parody of them. He doesn't seem to realise you also need to have talent.

He always looks like he smells really bad.

DamnYell, does everybody hate you in real life as much as they do on here?

65--a raging homo.

@59 You would do the dog in Brittney's lap. I am sure there is enough room for 3 or 4 of them up there. As for Veggi and I getting a room, are you jealous? Does it both you that nobody in here would even think of fucking you? When was the last time a real man gave you a little dick? And paying for it or bribing the homeless man with a bottle of Ripple does not.

Ya know, I've been thinking long and hard about who would be the perfect poster boy for a pro-abortion argument and I think I've found him.

"When was the last time a real man gave you a little dick?"

"little"

oops.

DanYELL, you're the authority.....is Pete Doherty a crack whore or not?

I think he's kinda amusing.He could charge also those paparazzi right away for allowing them to take pictures.I'm almost sure he'll want the quits in cash and run to the nearest drugdealer after he received it.

Thank you Fish for covering the (unintentional) greatest comedic talent of the 21st Century. This is truly guilt free hatefulness. Anyone, and apparently everyone, can cut this guy with rapier wit a fun time is had by all. Mischa having no shame to date Cisco's sac is NOTHING compared to the lack of shame Kate Moss has, I'm astounded frankly. Like I said before, I beg you to cover this guy like white on rice, he is that funny.

@52 -- I actually don't respond to everything you write, just the insanely stupid shit. I mean I know that covers almost all of it, but I have let many of them just go by. I am pretty fucking kind that way. I've just heard a few nitwits here say you're funny and trying to figure out their definition of humor. Methinks you're actually white. No self respekin' ghetto girl would let herself get smacked repeatedly. Please refer to #63 for any further questions.

danielle's teeth are so yellow traffic slows down when she smiles.

DanYELL so fat her blood type is Ragu.

Why would anyone refer to Kate Moss as an old queen? Petey, that's just harsh, man.

#77 - HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I haven't laughed that hard since the second grade (when I first heard that joke).

Would you prefer DanYELL so stupid it takes her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes?

danYELL so fat when she fell in love she broke it.

DanYELL so fat when she broke her leg, gravy poured out.

#63 OXOXOXXOXOX Wally

wally's a walrus, not an ox.

danielle's so hairy she wears a Nike tag on her weave so now everybody calls her Hair Jordan.

danYELL so fat when she hauls ass, she gotta make two trips.

DanYELL so stupid she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Jif.

danYELL so fat if she got that flesh-eating disease, the doc would give her 5 years to live.

danielle's so black she can leaves fingerprints on charcoal.

DanYELL's lips are so big that she puts her lipstick on with a paint roller.

You ALL are so stupid that....

You carry on with jokes circa 1990 even though the actual person you're telling jokes about hasn't posted shit since 64....

(silence)

Retards.

#91 I'm surprised you're admitting to that one...usually when you get schooled you blame ALL your lame posts on your troll!

..........................
*shrugs shoulders, snickers*

Anyhow, DanYELL so fat she deep fries her toothpaste

P.S. You so fat your cereal bowl has a lifeguard.

@92.

Would you just go away? God. You're like a friggin' insect of some sort.

Don't you have fries to serve, a pregnancy test to take?

Fuck off.

#58 I confused their last names. I might have been high at the time.
"Is Chicago. Is not Chicago." All their albums are great!

DanYELL is like an SUV--big, black and room for six men inside.

danYELL a light eater. It light out, she eat.

DanYELL so fat when she goes to the zoo the elephants throw peanuts at her.

@98.

What the hell was that? That shit doesn't even make sense. Please quit while you're ahead. The only joke you could tell sucessfully would be to go back in time, witness your birth and yell "damn that's an ugly kid".

Go play with a gun.

@97.

So you must be a friggin limo, huh?

Long, preferably white and big enough to fit 12...maybe 13 if your mouth counts.

Hmmm...

Hey Tonay.

Now that's a good comeback, DanYELL! Good for you, Sasquatch!!!
DanYELL is like a vaccum...she blows, sucks and gets laid in the closet.

I jest...DanYELL ain't so bad.....she'd give you the hair off her back if you asked!

danielle's like Burger King... have it your way.

danielle's so black she spits chocolate milk..... she's so black she keeps getting marked absent at night school.

danielle's so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved!

Alright, enough with the fucking simile's.

DanYELL is like a bowling ball... she gets picked up, fingered, thrown in the gutter and she still comes back for more

Uuuhhh... a simile is when you use "like" or "as". For example:

danielle is AS dumb as a brick (sorry bricks, juuust trying to make an example).

danielle smells LIKE shit.

See? The rest are just servings of humble pie my tootsie rolled lil kim lookalike.

I heard a couple of dirty mother fuckers the other day sayin, "DanYELL is like the cable bill....I haven't paid the bitch in three months!!"

And oh, if I may, the pluralized form of simile would simply be "similes", as opposed to the possesive apostrophe "s" you idiotically added. They teach that stuff in middle school you know. Maybe they'll give you a lack of intelligence waiver and let you back in.

@107.

Ya used "like" in 104 you stupid ass cracker. Instead of trying to "correct" my grammar, try learning some yourself. Fucking dingbat.

@110 -- Please refer to comment #110. And of course by refer to comment #110 I mean go fuck yourself. You're like kicking bunnies... fun at first, but a little messy on the shoes after a while.

@111.

Well, kicking yourself in the nuts isn't messy...since ya have none.

Go kick yourself in the crotch for a coupla hours. Maybe the blood will rush to your brain so you can post more "original" comebacks.

#96 Right on.

#84 as I am he and you are she and we are all together

#87 is my favorite

Esteemed AuthorPerson, you insult crack whores everywhere.

Re #5- do *not* give that pedo freak *ideas*.

was, is, always will be!

ur all mad annoyin at least this site is interesti to read http://kayvan13.blogspot.com/

# 87 Isn't that line you said stolen from "The Fresh Prince of Bel Air"? Seriosuly, it is. I heard it on there.
No offence.

Is that roadkill under his hat?

I fucking love Pete Doherty. And you know he must me A-MAZING in the sack... most STD infested junkies are. But he has absolutely NO pigment in his skin whatsoever at all... I think he and Ms. Dunst would be quite a sexy couple...

I love Pete Doherty because he does the craziest things. He's a 30 something man who looks like a 16 year old boy who has just seen a ghost. Go Pete Doherty! I really wish for him to just jump out of the bushes and shoot me with a water gun one of these days.

Wow, before your site, I didn't even know who Pete Dougherty was. Now I know all too much...

I really love the term "fuckTard".

I think I am going to try to work it into my everyday conversations.

Including easter Dinner:
"Nana, Could you please stop being a FuckTard and pass the ham salad?"

Oops gotta go, My FuckTard boss is giving me the stink eye!

Pete Doherty is a talentless fucktard.

Wearing junkie business on his sleeve is so uncool and doesn't alter the fact that his music sucks big time.

fuck this shit pete doherty is the fittest thing <3

fuck this shit pete doherty is the fittest thing <3