Feb 26 2007Jessica Biel doesn't need a bra

"And now on PTV, Its the Peter Griffin Side Boob Hour..."

first.

Second?? BITCHEZ!!!

Killer rack.
Killer ass.

All those gym workouts are keeping it right!

Damn she has a nice body.

Is it wrong to masturbate here at work? I guess HR will have to answer that question...

However, she does need her shoulder be pushed back in place and she also need to get rid of that half fat cow face and body standing next to her

1st pic. I look at her face, then her boob, then the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man on the right.

MY EYES!

Surely she has some double-stick tape keeping the dress from flapping open, at least? They're looking a bit low though. I wouldn't go so far as to say she doesn't need one...she can get away without it, but she would benefit from having some sort of support.

Have you noticed that not once is anyone looking at her in those pictures.

Man, what has been drinking the past week diuretics?
She looks like she just dropped 20 pounds and is about to enter a concentration camp movie.

Or maybe she's just been doing meth for a week. She certainly looks like she's been aging super fast.

And whats up with that guys face in the third pic? Did someone attack his face with a cookie cutter?

For all the attention she's been getting on her looks recenetly, it doesn't really seem like she tried to hard to look good at the Oscars. That dress is ill fitting and the color is nausiating.

Og God....you know, I didn't watch the Academy Awards for a reason.....THEY ARE BORING!!!!
But now I have to read about them all day???
Work is going to suck today. So, anybody know....did Lindsay show? Was she wasted? What about Hilton? We all KNOW Brit wasn't there. But why would she be, she's not an actress, she a psychopath. Well, at least I can finally relate to her now. We're so similar, Brit and I. I even brought my umbrella to work with me in case the lawyers give me any "problems"...

All that beauty and she still can't pick a decent dress.

Side boobs make the world go around.

Now if we could just remember why Ms. Biel is famous...

Why don't I find her attractive? I mean, something about her body just doesn't look sexy. Compare the two Jessica's - Alba is so damn sexy but Biel just has something odd about her look. Heck, even Simpson I'd take over Biel...er, well, Simpson when she was all toned and sexy and natural looking, not the clown make-up Simpson that gets paraded on this website.

I can't believe people still intentionally wear fuscia. It is a foul color no matter what you look like.

She was flashing Ellen.

I honestly don't know what the big deal about her is. I just saw her in the Illusionist and she sucked. Very mediocre actress.

As far as I can tell, the big deal is that she works out a lot, focusing mostly on her butt. Consequently her butt is very firm and high. That suggests to many that she would enjoy anal sex, and be quite skilled at it. I'm not exactly sure how they get from A to B, and it seems like she's into chicks anyway, but there you have it.

Mark my words, she's going to look like a total hag in about ten years. Or maybe even in ten months.

This is not a good look for her. She normally looks great...

Is it just me, or does she look like Evangeline Lilly having a bad hair/clothes/everything day?

#15, 16, & 19 THANK YOU!!!!
The last time I said something to the effect of "Who the Hell is this chick" and that I don't find her attractive some asshole said I was lying and that I must be "jealous" of her.
But see? People agree with me!!!!!!!

Add me to the list kari, I think Biel is WAAAYY too fricken butch. Man shoulders will never be sexy. If Michelle Rodriguez and Carol Channing bore offspring together, you'd get Biel.

@the headline: bras aren't necessary when you have no tits:)

Stop being haters, bi-atches. Funniest article-snippet I've read in a long time!

#23 - another amen. Great body but fugly face. Anyone who works out a lot can have a great body but I can't quite describe why I find her face offensive. And, although no one agrees with me on this, I think Cameron is a doll.

nice bride of frankenstein hairdo.

and what's with all the awkward poses?

Waaaaay too manly. You've got to question your orientation if you're jacking to this one.

You know, we see it all the time. A woman gets mega-attention because she's hot. Then they cross that line where they start working out too much, get plastic surgery, etc. - just to keep it going. They end up looking very mediocre. It's too bad in Jessica's case, cause she used to be smokin' hot. There is just no comparison to natural beauty.

I still think she's a very attractive woman. But what about that hair? It's so nappy looking. Is she part black and we didn't know?

I've said it once and I'll say it again, she can take on Mothra, and then rape it.

Seriously, Jessica Biel: great body (esp. the ass) but that face is not very pretty. Look at the face without checking out the body - is that really hot? She looks like that old actress Jane Wyman, but less pretty. And that frumpy hair and those waxy teeth. I don't attually have anything against her but I don't know why she is considered pretty! She looks like a well-preserved 50 year old in that pic.

#16- Are you talking about Homer or Marge?

5. ... and by HR I mean the drive through manager.

Man I want her so bad. Does she bang black dudes?

Beats the fark out of me what anyone sees in this manish untalented fug. Her tits sag too. That made my day. Even Timberfuck doesn't want her snooty ass (or dick).

"black" is fine, "dude" is not.

I agree with #10... another amazing body reduced to boney proportions for no particular reason other than to fit in with the current Hollywood standard. A total shame. I just hope it's the result of The Academy Awards Diet and that this week she starts eating cheeseburgers again (because everyone in Hollywood goes on juice fasts and has colon cleansings in February to prep for this show).

#38: What? Get off my dick.

Bride of Frankenstein hair!

Really, I could wash my dishes with that hair.

her hair looks like a bowl of spaghetti

the 80's called they want the fuschia dress back

The side boob says 'lets party' but the mom-hair says 'who wants more brownines?'

#38 LMAO!!!
Ok, back upstairs to look some more at that "Pink" dude's bikini

Normally I think she looks smoking hot, but here ...she looks all bony. Where's the toned, strong, shapely body I drool over? It's exciting when she's fit and in shape, but bony? Is not attractive. And she looks old, too ... her skin does.
Oh Jessica, where has your hot body gone?

Her boob has got a red mark on it... maybe from a bra or someone squeezing it?

That's where a guy tried to touch her boob and it got a little scratched when she broke his finger off and drove it through his skull.

Apparently along with the bra, she doesn't need any sleep. Jesus, check out those double bags under her eyes!

And the problem witb this *is*?

She is getting old looking fast. Side boobs shouldn't sag and droop like that at her age. It is like she didn't really try to look outstanding. Maybe she over slept and just threw herself together.

I really don't understand why people find her attractive. She's so boring.

This proves that the average "hot" life of a woman in Hollywood (career-wise, of course) is about 5 years, tops. Then they start looking old and nasty. Look at Denise Richards, Pam Anderson, Lyndsay Lohan, Britney Spears...I could go on and on. Men, of course, can be hot forever (look at George Clooney, Brad Pitt and Pink, although you could argue Pink has never really been hot but those abs never seem to lose their tonage...)

am i the only one who thought HOLY HELL WHO DID HER MAKEUP??? it looked like she dug up a 2 yr old bottle of Neutrogena self tanner and applied only to face. and that gown. that gown did NOTHING for her, and even less from a side view.

wait...upon closer inspection i think it might be a spary tan. and she was wearing a V-neck sweater when she had it done.

Am I the only one that noticed that weird red mark on her boob? Really. What the hell is that?

What's the red mark #57? What's that sitting on her neck would be more to the point. Ouch that's nasty, I want to gouge my eyes out with a spoon.

i am so dyke for this bitch.

I am constantly amazed by people's obsession with this chick. She has a horse face, ala Hilary Swank. She has man breasts, (is that a CREASE in her boob? How is that possible?) and dont forget arms/shoulders like a dude.
I dont get it.

ohh c'mon, don't hate...She is a very Very Beautiful Girl.....And Looks like a human been for a change...!!!! Jennifer Hudson Looked Beautiful too..GOD, I LOVE THAT GIRL!!!!

That dress is pretty cool :)

I don't get what all the fuss is about her either. She's only 24, but she looks way older than that. She has crow's feet for the love of God. Plus her body is way too manly. Eww. And what's with her hair and jacked up lips. I don't get it!!!

mmm....that's the first nice mental image this site has given me in weeks!

JESSICA HAS A HORSE FACE.

YUCK.