Feb 15 20072007 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue

I owe you one.

This probably makes up for any mistakes Sports Illustrated has made in the past.

Where's Britney looking haggard? Where's Lindsay stumbling out of rehab? Why are there hot models all over my self-confidence booster site? *sniffles*

Oh yeah...that covers it, all right.

I'm gonna go get my ipod and download some really long podcasts about politics.

–That's the best I could do, I wanted to at least be TOP FIVE!!!!!!!!

Now thats cover material,not that over rated tenament howler Beyonce

She is never going to get the smell out of that Ipod!!!!!

Looks like paris hilton except you know with boobs..

Even the Port's gonna sprout a little wood over this one, very, very, very little wood.

Wait for the incredible claims of horse-like sexual scale and prowess, ...

Agree with Prazzie, my self esteem took a battering looking at this. There had better be some fat, haggard whorish celebs further down today's posting or I will be filled with even more self loathing than usual

Hey, that will be great for Apple's new iPod campaign.

iPods. Great for listening to all your favorite music AND keeping your privates warm.

You people need to see what all those whores look like without all the airbrushing and make-up/shit on the face. They most likely look like used & abused sluts who have been spunked on too much.

nice iPoon

OMG< There is a heaven after all!

This was far to much false advertising. Most of those models had far to much swim suit and far to little ipod.

Her tits look like they're about to choke her for her ipod.

where'd her swimsuit go?

I was enjoying this, greatly and then Beyonce had to fuck it all up. bleh

I think eleven minutes is enough time to bang out at least two or three loads. But what about the other ten hours and forty-nine minutes? No sandwich takes that long.

AWESOME! They've finally invented invisible swimsuits! Nice one, "Sports" illustrated :)

Awesome stuff.

Dude! You now know I will get NO work done today because of you! Good looking out!

#11...and the downside is?

Is that a 20G or a 60G ipod?

Slim, I have to respectfully disagree. Beyonce is unfairly attractive. I didn't even look at the other chicks. Too bad she likes camels.

I feel kinda dumb wearing these 3D glasses, but women have told me they make me look like a scientist ;-)

Why is there an iPod on her bajingo? And where is her swimsuit? I thought this was a "swimsuit issue." With no swimsuit, it's more like the "naked issue." No problem, I guess, but let's have some truth in advertising.

BTW, could we have some decent pictures of men on this site some time? I know The Superficial is all about the ladies, but I think he/they should be secure enough in his/their masculinity to give the ladies and the homos something to look at. Just a suggestion. Nudity is for everybody.

Good point 26# .. bring on the men!

I'm a gal... and a straight one at that, but I have to say she accessorizes well.

I agree with bringing on the men... and the good looking ones, please?!?! (I think that needs to be clarified.)

I'd like to bust a nut in her Ipod.........

has anyone even looked at those models?
jesus it's so fucking downhill!
totally average, all of them and marissa miller is pretty much the only one with the killer body. so sad..so true. i'm not going to buy it.

where's the ipod shuffle when we need it?

Killer body? Are you fucking kidding me? Anyone who says this haggard, leathery bitch has a killer body has obviously never fucked a woman before.
Severe case of anorexia? Check
Leathery, sun-fucked face? Check
Ugly, horrible tit job? Check

That cord running around and through her tits looks like the pearl necklace I need to give her.

Remember, girls asking for more nekkid men...we got Harry Potter the other day.

#26 There is actually a very specific reason that there are not many pics of men on this site.

Two words: Cisco Adler

Or if I can't give her a pearl necklace, perhaps a Cincinnati bowtie.

#26, agreed!
I believe the last nude pic of a guy on here was mischa(sp?) barton's bf. enough said.

yeah..now that i took a closer look at her..they're all pretty gross looking.
11 hours i spent a whole 11 seconds looking at that page.

Look in some Shape magazines from like mid 90's. marissa miller first showed up in those, all flat chested and freckly. Then she got DD implants and a permatan and is almost unrecodnizable as her "former" self.

Don't ask for pictures of naked men! Women's bodies are beautiful, men's are disgusting. Nobody wants to see them naked in full lighting. At home, in the bedroom, with the right lighting, the right mood, they're ok. But otherwise, bleech.

Damn!!! And to all those people that were trying to say Beyonce deserved to be on the cover cuz actual models bodies aren't hot, umm, yeah, I think this picture helps end that debate...Beyonce who?

driver side and passenger side airbags fully deployed. Volvo has her tagged for their next ad campaign. FUCK that's a lot of silicone.

what the fuck, couldn't they have used a nano instead.

am i the only person who thinks having uncomfortable gritty sand stuck all over your body in a weird smeared pattern is NOT attractive?

There is only one thing I do not understand; why do they even bother using real people for American photo shoots anymore? They should simply computer generate one orange-glo image with an emaciated body, huge tits, huge lips, fake hair, and tons of pancake make-up, and a "I want to get banged and suck dick 24/7" expression on their face. It seems the more fake a woman is, the more attractive she is considered. I can't seem to get my head around that one...

Could i borrow your iPod for a while...?Please.

She must be lip synching.

@48... Ha! I don't know which RichPort you are, but *that* was funny.

I did specify decent pictures of men ("decent" meaning attractive), I was assuming everyone knew that meant no more like that heinous Cisco "My Genitals Are Deformed" Adler picture (in fact, I think Superficial owes us just for that one). I didn't mind Harry Potter naked. A little on the scrawny side, but other than that, not that bad. I disagree that naked men are disgusting; sometimes, they are very, very awesome.

#11: You should see 98% of the girls out there with the same makeup and airbrushing—they wouldn't look anywhere near as good. Insofar as it's acceptable to admire people for their good looks, it's acceptable to admire the best-looking people the most. It's really not that big of a deal.

#11: You should see 98% of the girls out there with the same makeup and airbrushing—they wouldn't look anywhere near as good. Insofar as it's acceptable to admire people for their good looks, it's acceptable to admire the best-looking people the most. It's really not that big of a deal.

Here you go ladies........http://img122.imageshack.us/img122/6904/cannavaro8qd.jpg

damn. one little g fucked the whole thing up. HERE
http://img122.imageshack.us/img122/6904/cannavaro8qd.jpg

Okay, I'll see that Ipod and raise it one unfortunately placed soccer ball!!

since when is an ipod considered a swim suit?

# 46, works for me. Robots, holograms cyborgs whatever, it's all good as long as they have big tits.

If I don't get my issue soon, the terrorists have obviously won.

When I die, I want to come back as Marrisa's Ipod.

#46, agreed.

I thought this was Paris Hilton at first, and was very disturbed.

Those are some nasty lookin fakes!

If it makes you ladies feel better, I can tell you I used to be a designer for Reebok. We didn't have a single model I didn't airbrush. All of them except one had cellulite (just a little pucker, but it was there), and I had to enhance the chest on all of them. OH, and two of them had bubble buts I had to slim down-- and acne, moles ect. These women are gorgeous, but they are real people and definately not perfect.

She has a lovely, graceful body...until you hit those horrible silicone bags bolted to her pecs. But, hell, I clicked on the Cisco Adler link, so I've seen Hell. Nothing can bother me now.

Marisa Miller is gorgeous. Santa Cruz natives represent.

Oh no! Why would anyone as cute as Marissa Miller want to make their face look like Paris Hilton's?!

"Dude, smell my iPod."

#65 lmao! it's rare to find something that funny at the end of a thread. kudos.

actually i think she looks like jessica simpson

I like iPods.

NICE....all I can say is...NICE.

Oh, to be an iPod...

#46, check out Julie Henderson. She is a refreshing exception to the trend you railed against.

As for this Marrisa chick, those airbaggy tits make her look horribly deformed.

This picture is so hott!! Anyone who talks negatively about this is just jealous-- I am jealous!! And anyone who makes a bad remark about her implants is probably small busted and just bitter... or is lucky enough to have a nice pair of breasts and should give the girl a break.

You have to objectify women because you couldn't get laid if you tried, you pathetic, misogynist prick LOSER.

Everything is fine until you look at that face. You might as well masturbate to a picture of your neighbor's pug on a leash.

mmm...er...gotta go use the bathroom

I'd suggest modeling a man in that pose but then again, if he had anything worth looking at, that ipod wouldn't cover it.