Jan 19 2007Lindsay Lohan is super desperate, drunk

Next stop, Carrot Top

I think she needs a personality transplant, not rehab.

what the fuck is she wearing? wow.

That was Linds laying there? MY BAD! I thought housekeeping just dropped a sack of shit on the floor. heh...stepped right over it......WOOPS!

Wow, I'm usually like 45th. top ten...wow. anyway, rehab? like no one saw this coming. I love what her mom said about it too. They both are totally undereducated wastes of space.

fuckin, she'll be out in no time, once a coke fiend always a coke fiend, i smoked a blunt and watched mean girls, it was amazing, herbie fully loaded drunk, hilarious, fuckin, imagine smoking a blunt with her or paris hilton or something, what goes through their heads? jesus. at least lohan has been in movies, what does paris hilton think about, she goes places and people follow her every move for no reason, she must be high 24/7. mindfuckkk

I am actually starting to feel bad for her. Her life has spun out of control. Yes, it can be entertaining to watch her sink into the vortex but I still feel a little twinge deep in the black pit of my heart. She could have done so much with her life. She is 20 with a reputation of being a drunk whore who throws fits when she doesn't get her way... it IS a shame.

Read somewhere that this Franco (no fucking idea who he is) dude was there with his girlfriend.

Are they also gonna treat her whoring addiction in Wonderland, or is a gang of other men's girlfriends gonna have to treat that by beating the shit out of her?

her life is actually spiraling into mean girls

He dared say no to Lohan? Does he not know that what Lohan wants, Lohan gets?

rachael ray is a demon from hell at crabbie's

If Jason Weinberg were my manager, I would get drunk, cry and pass out too. That little midget has one of those loose, weak, wet, slimy handshakes that makes you cringe and reach for the Purell. They deserve each other.

Love, Horseonovich

Google me!

That's a fucked up name for a rehab place. Wonderland.
I wonder what I did all those times I was fucked up?

James Franco doesn't swing that way. He's got a thing for Spiderman.

PS--I just googled this Franco dude and guess what..............he's a fag. you can tell just by lookin' at him.

lol

Barbado:

May congratulate you on:

-Being first
-Not writing first
-Writing something that was actually pretty damn funny

Am I the first to call her Lindsay Lohab? Is that even funny? Eh, not really.

im gonna go to California for spring break, smoke some danky, go to tijuana, get some acid or rolls or some shit, def. hit up rodeo or w/e, and see some celebs, omg if i could smoke a blunt with gwen stefani, thatd be the shit, no doubt was amazing mannnn, if lohans outta rehab by then, we burnin, and id fuck the living shit out of her during our 6 hour marathon wild rabid donkey sex session

again, this chick is pathetic. obviously showing her meat curtains was a bad idea. after seeing that, no one is going to want to get with her.

Did the child molestor... or, Joe Francis... move on so soon? Who would have thought he was a "love em and leave em" kind of guy?

Franco is a "fag"? I'm unfamiliar with that term - does anyone know a synonym?

20--Isaiah Washington knows a few.

I think at a party when I was 21, cried about to an ex while too drunk and threw some kind of fit or quiet personal tantrum about something stupid... but I didn't end up passed out on a floor in a hotel, I didn't cry to some "dude" that already rejected me. Jesus Christ, have some type of pride, Hoslan!

As an aside, I didn't end up in rehab, but ended up married and quite happy.

Go figure...maybe I just needed to have a little less self-esteem and I could end up in Wonderland, too.

Oh ya, that's right!!! My dad's not in prison for being a dumb crook! Ah, I get it now. You have to have dumb parents to end up a dumb bitch.

All I gotta say about that is, "oh what dude!!?"

-Maxwell Smart

What happened to Joe Francis? James Franco is WAY out of her league. There's no way any respectable human being will ever date her.

I think the big problem is that we all are fascinated by that idiot.

#17...no celebrity on their right mind would get high with you...me on the other hand...well several already have. You're lame for even posting that comment. No one thinks you're cool...no one.

#21 - quite witty, jrz. Nice comeback. miggs must be British & is wondering why Franco is being called a cigarette.
Let's try this one out - he's a tart!

For those who are asking about her addiction to semen being treated @ Wonderland, my idea yesterday was that she could kick the semen habit at Michael Jackson's Neverland, where the girls there don't get exposed to any semen. Just the boys.

Hmmm ... isn't any funnier today, either.

Remember, the over/under on her relapse & death by overdose is 2 years, as set by jrz.

Michael Jackson luv jrzmami!

Actually i was just joking about all the comments on the JR Knight thread listing terms for guys who like the muddy helmut.

I wish Superfishdoode would post something on Dane Cook, read that he's personally going after any blogger who goes negative on his ass. I'm sure some superfishers would love to go town on a real pseudo-celeb. Emphasis on pseudo, I mean Cook might have been funny when he started but now he's just a hack.

WHATTAYA SAY FISHDOODE!?!?!?!

Wonderland, i wonder if they do the same as Neverland ranch and give out "Jesus" juice. or maybe she gets to chase a white rabbit around all day looking for a fun tea party. Hohan seriously needs mental help and to get away from the Limelight for a while, or she will end up like Gary Coleman...

Lowlife--who is jrzmami? Are you a guaozer?

Miggs-i know.

Who the fuck is Dane Cook?

To clear up a few things,i was never "cracked"!The only thing what was "cracked" is jrzmami her butthole!I borrowed her the keys but now she refuses to give them back.Really goOd girl!

This dude:

http://www.bestweekever.tv/2007/01/17/exlusive-dane-cook-is-my-myspace-pen-pal/

Sorry It won't post the link properly. Just google: dane cook + bloggers.

he's supposed to be THE stand-up comedian of the moment.

Can someone translate #34 for me? I don't understand Idiot very well.

i agree with #26. that's the kind of comment you make when your 14 and you're trying to impress the 13 year old wannabe hippie chicks, who wear old plaid button-down shirts and cords, but have yet to actually do anything remotely hippie. mention weed and they'll follow you, before they realize that looking gross looks gross, and ditch you for the GQ yups.

#16: Yes, it is.

Did anyone else hear her mom on the morning shows today? Making a plea for privacy? Going on and on about the press and what vultures they are and "Can't you they just leave us alone?"

Well, no, actually. You can't have it both ways. Because how much did La Lohan make for her last movie or for her most recent magazine spread? You can't say, "Be fascinated by my daughter...but not THAT fascinated."

(30)Send me his IP-adress!

Dane Cook? He's *totally* gay.

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

#40: I would dearly love to just slap the piss out of her mother. She is such a piece of shit. She acts like SHE is a celebrity, when she's little more that some gutterslut's mother.

I would have nailed her in the pooper while she was passed out.

#44- I would reckon that mom is also a gutterslut. Read some story about her on a dinner date recently in some upscale NY restaurant and her date was fingerfucking her under the table. No word as to whether said date had to have his finger reattached after it burnt off, though.

#46: I saw that same story. Of course, the skank denied it ever happened, but I believe it did.

Good post, by the way.

Finally! This is the opportunity I've been waiting for. At some point during rehab, LL will fall asleep on her side or stomach - not wearing panties of course - and somebody (staff? lush?) will snap a cell phone pic of her sparkly browneye, and post it on the internet. I can't wait! I'm going to rush out to get lotion and tissues, hope I don't miss anything!!!

(46)Maybe the fingerfucker needed a dressing for his salad.

Those aren't rehab photos, according to her clothes, they were taken on the set of her new movie "Undercover Lumberjack"

The sad part about rehab is that you can get the best drugs there, as you are surrounded by fellow afficianados. Wonderland is prob the result of a client name contest.

#30...I agree, go after him. I'm a big fan of his comedy, but this attempt at acting and his massive ego are a bit much. You hardly ever read anything bad about him on the net, other than random people who aren't into his work. I think it would be funny to talk shit about him and see if he reacts.

you guys have no idea...

its not the drugs...
...its whether you are in control

duh ?

and they say all the good ones are taken!

#29 - sorry - I didn't read that post. Have no interest in two homos on a talk show. I didn't see Brokeback Mountain, either.

Carry on.

A synonym for fag would be like that Franco guy looks like a homo, or a turd burglar, ass wrancher etc...

To be fair, it's probably not so much a rejection of her but of her fucking humpback and pancake ass. None of this would be a problem if she'd correct her spinal curvature by lifting anything off the floor when she's exercizing instead of whatever the hell it is she thinks she's getting out of pretending to box.

http://thesuperficial.com/image.php?path=/2007/01/03/lindsay-lohan-pool-bikini-03.jpg
http://thesuperficial.com/2007/01/lindsay_lohan_lives_in_her_bik.html
http://thesuperficial.com/2006/08/lindsay_lohan_boxes_in_her_bik.html

Is she just salable just 'cause like making fun of her? Is that the only reason anyone ever hires her? DOES anyone hire her? What's she done lately? In China, they'd just put a bullet in the back of her head and charge her family for it and that would be the end of it.

Faster, Lindsay Lohan! Die! Die!

20. "RichPort" should work fine in most contexts.

37. But you are fluent in "cunt". wedgeone is conversant in both "idiot" and "cunt", so ask her to translate.

#6: You start your post with "fuckin"? Now there's a first class mind at work.
But in answer to your question "what does Paris think?" Newsflash for you, she doesn't. But if she ever managed to form a whole thought and transfer it into actual words from her mouth, it would most likely be "that's haaawt". Not that it would make any sense, it just seems to be the full extent of her vocabulary.

Okay yall, yall ain't gonna believe what I found:
http://www.circatrade.com/ViewProduct.php?id=89
here is perhaps not the place for a lesson in Bhuddism but...Briefly then, a little on Lohans:
In Theravada Buddhism, the Arhat, translated into Chinese as "Lohan", is one who has followed the Eightfold Path and has achieved deliverance of this earthly existence. He has reached "the other shore" and is saved for all eternity. In him the asavas - the craving for sensual pleasures, earthly existence, ignorance and wrong views - are gone. He is subject to no more rebirths and karma.

Lohans are well-known for their great wisdom, courage and supernatural power. Due to their abilities to ward off the evil, Lohans have became guardian angels of the Buddhist temple and there in the main hall standing guard are the ever-present, indomitable-looking 18 Lohan figures, sometimes accompanied by 500 or more lesser Lohans.
(from Buddhanet.com)

I can only say that I have pissed myself with laughter now...Can you *image* 500 lesser Lohans?

I just realized something...we are all part of the problem. Most of us can agree that the likes of Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, and Britney Spears reads like a who's who of human crap. So why do we pay the slightest bit of attention to them? If everyone just STOPPED paying attention to them, they would have no careers, and would finally do what we all wish they would do to begin with and just go away. It's fun to make fun of them, and the things said on this site are pretty funny most of the time, but all it does is prolong their careers and their time in the spotlight, and even enlarges their bank accounts. So I think if everyone here really hated these skanks enough, we'd all just quit giving them the attention they crave and focus our energy on something that matters. Then again, I'm one of the few intelligent people who reads this site, so I doubt anyone will follow.

#61 Yeah, right, one of the few...Ted Kaczynski called, he wants his ability to reason back when you're done with it...

You can see the exclusive Lindsay in Wonderland

LOL ROFL ..here:

http://www.sujet.co.uk/2007/01/21/lindsay-in-wonderland/

jamba juice sucks.

& 58 is fluent in "trolling", "cowardice", and "droll".

And because he is a droll troll, he FLTC!!

65. I simply prefer guerrilla warfare to standing in ranks on an open field. Think Sun Tzu, not Clausewitz.

I have used original names on the Superficial, but they mean nothing to me because I realize that this site and all of its content is anonymous, meaningless and inconsequential, unless one elects to reveal personal information.

RichPort is blissfully unaware of his narcissism, and seems compelled to direct unsolicited attacks on others, while I prefer egalitarianism. I'm simply diluting his "brand", not because it's worth anything to me, but because it means everything to him, and it's probably all that he has.

Seriously, jrzmommy stepped in it when she claimed not to understand "idiot". I couldn't resist, and I hear that, ...

RPLTC, a very, very, very long time!

Man, I better stop drinking Red Bull or I'll end up in rehab, too!

#67 - I don't seem to recall Rich unloading on anyone who doesn't first bash on him, except for DamYell, and I'm thinking that their feud goes back long before I'd ever heard of The Superficial. Maybe one pop on a really stupid comment, but not a perpetual pummeling (except in DamYell's case).

How does posting homosexual remarks on this board under his name promote egalitarianism in any way? Now if you posted gay remarks using the name "Donald Trump" or something like that, I could understand that. But Rich is one like us - one of the average and ordinary who are here to get "egalitarianistic" on those who don't deserve their fame or fortune.

Just lighten up, ok? And be yourself.

I HATE FIRECROTCH THAT FUCKING UGLY BITCH.

who the *** is lindsay lohan!?? why she's so famous!?

who is she ? ...

...she's a fucking good actor
...and you are not : )

so fuck you babe...

back to obscurity

bye...

yeah, i'd reject that too....or squeeze out a quickie in the bathroom stall!