Jan 31 2007Courtney Love not replacing Paula Abdul
Courtney Love claimed yesterday she was being brought in to replace Paula Abdul on American Idol, but now the executive producer who allegedly called her is denying he ever made the call. He says:
"I did not call Courtney Love and am afraid someone may have misrepresented me. Courtney Love is a very talented artist, but the judges for American Idol are Paula, Randy and Simon. We have no plans to add to or replace any of them." So who made that mysterious phone call? A source close to Love says, "It was probably a prank." A rep for Love adds, "There's no truth to it whatsoever."
The first sign the story might not have been true was that the source was Courtney Love. I'm surprised she was quoted as even using words. Usually it's just some slurred mumbling like: "Iaa wannna make nngggghh. Nggghhh it huuuuuurts. Huungry. I'mma so huungry. Nggghh." She probably thinks she gets important calls all the time, when really she's just talking into her shoe like it's a phone.
Reader Comments
1. vaselineintensive - January 31, 2007 2:08 PM
first!
2. missykissy - January 31, 2007 2:09 PM
I thought only Anna Nicole made those noises.
3. cami_calzone - January 31, 2007 2:09 PM
Does anyone care??? Second, I think.
4. suzy - January 31, 2007 2:12 PM
well duh
5. wedge1 - January 31, 2007 2:13 PM
so she says the n-word constantly when she's doing her slurred mumblings?
6. JungleRed - January 31, 2007 2:14 PM
That's too bad. That would've been awesome TV. But I wouldn't replace Paula, just add Courtney and watch the magic unfold as those two strung out broads go at it. I don't watch Idol, but I'd tune in to watch that.
7. K.Guevara - January 31, 2007 2:17 PM
Definately would be a better choice than Paul abdul. I'd much rather look at a horse while i'm submitting myself to bad tv. And by a horse i mean courtney love. Paula's resemblance to my foot can only be watched for so long.
8. Jason The Barbarian - January 31, 2007 2:19 PM
I had actually gotten my hopes up on this one, too...
9. kathleen170 - January 31, 2007 2:20 PM
She doesn't look terrible for once.
10. combustion8 - January 31, 2007 2:21 PM
they need someone to replace that train wreck paula.. she's a mess.
11. kamihi - January 31, 2007 2:24 PM
Talking of the judges that Randy fella makes me wanna stomp on his face and throat permanenetly damaging his vocal chords and voice box, so he can never say "Dude" again, I hate that man, Simon and Paula are music to ears after than fat ugly repulsive fool.
12. Do Freebird - January 31, 2007 2:25 PM
This is bullshit! I'm telling ya Fox TV, Uh-huh I'm talking to *YOU* Rupert Murdoch!!! Don't go messing with the American Pete Doherty! She might be a stumbling, slurred speech, cum incrusted, filthy haired, crack smoking whore-bag, but she's OUR stumbling, slurred speech, cum incrusted, filthy haired, crack smoking whore-bag.
13. kamihi - January 31, 2007 2:35 PM
maybe Courtney could be instructed to accidentally break Randys fingers off so he can't do those stupid black man finger signs he does (50 years old and he thinks he's 18) maybe one day my dream will come true.
14. Peter Coffin - January 31, 2007 2:43 PM
She could get on of Pauly Abdul would just "commit suicide."
15. John Doe Jr - January 31, 2007 2:43 PM
She probably spoke to the shows executive producer after she spoke to Kurt on the phone.
16. BarbadoSlim - January 31, 2007 2:49 PM
This is totally going to make her relapse, she might even kill herself, with a shotgun, to the head. Like her boyfriend did when he "committed" suicide...
17. D'oh Eyes - January 31, 2007 2:55 PM
So she talks into a shoe like it's a phone? Maybe she's just trying to "Get Smart".
I don't expect many people to get that.
18. F-Sucker - January 31, 2007 2:56 PM
I banged Courtney Love once.
I still haven't gotten rid of the crabs.
19. N@ughty - January 31, 2007 3:07 PM
wow! i like to talk into my shoes as phones too! usually, i make sure it has a cord going from the wall into the device instead of mistaking the shoestring for a cord that was half-eaten by rats...of course that only occurs when i'm drunk-OCCASIONALLY drunk. Courtney Love on the other hand was a natural born alcoholic. but who can help the mental illness right?
~N@ughty
20. Do Freebird - January 31, 2007 3:07 PM
#17
Let's see, I was about 12 and "99" was about 30, and God was she hot. I saw her 15-20 years later, on an episode of Cheers and she was still hot.
BTW for you young'uns, 99 was a secret agent in a 60's TV show that I have to admit I remember from it's first run. And did I mention she was hot?
21. Angry Ferret Jones - January 31, 2007 3:15 PM
I can't be certain, but I think one of these guys made that phone call:
Al Coholic
Oliver Clothesoff
I.P. Freely
Jacques Strap
Seymour Butz
Homer Sexual
Mike Rotch
Hugh Jass
Bea O'Problem
Amanda Huggenkiss
Ivana Tinkle
Anita Bath
Maya Buttreeks
Eura Snotball
Ollie Tabooger
Heywood U. Cuddleme
Elvis Jagger Abdul-Jabbar
22. woodhorse - January 31, 2007 3:23 PM
After seeing your photo of Paris smoking a tampon, nothing Courtney does seems particularly odd. Boring Courtney. Give Courtney Paula's space so she can acquire a personality by osmosis. well, she can if she copies Simon, Randy "Dog" doesn't "Dog" have a "Dog" personality. "Dog"
23. A. C. - January 31, 2007 3:30 PM
you know i think i might have pranked called her. but i get drunk alot and force a british accent and call people. i could have thought i was calling margot kidder and accidentally called courtney love. i should go over and apologize and then throw up in her hair and see if she eats it.
24. JessicaCha - January 31, 2007 3:32 PM
I would give anything to see them replace Paula with Courtney... can you see her stumbling up onstage with a contestant and trying to sing a duet?
I love Courtney!!! LOL
<3 Jess
25. flauccinaucinihilipilifcation - January 31, 2007 3:34 PM
she's been using Homer Simpson's make-up gun.
26. Truthseeker013 - January 31, 2007 3:41 PM
(*slight* sign of relief)
Not that I waste so much as an iota of time on that piece-of-crap show. I do, however, have to *hear* it, courtesy of my niece and sister. And my nerves are already bad enough...
27. Shadow*Walker - January 31, 2007 3:48 PM
We should just replace Paula with Big Rosie and point and laugh as we watch her eat everyone up.
28. Shadow*Walker - January 31, 2007 3:59 PM
TEAM ROSIE
29. tits_on_snack - January 31, 2007 4:03 PM
So. When did she get that nose.
30. the chicken - January 31, 2007 4:31 PM
#29 When Jennifer Aniston was done with it.
31. Kate&Tina - January 31, 2007 4:52 PM
#20 - Man, how old are you then? Cheers is pretty ancient - and you're saying that was 15-20 years after?!
32. Kate&Tina - January 31, 2007 4:56 PM
Anyway on the subject - the only people who would give a shit about this are people who still watch sucky american idol. So obviously a lot of people on superfish still do cos they seem to know a lot about it!! ha ha funny funny! :) :) :) :) :)
33. NicotineEyePatch - January 31, 2007 5:46 PM
So this is actually an update then. Good, so I can safely expect that tomorrow Courtney will be rolling around on the sidewalk somewhere asking random strangers to make love to her, and the day after that, she'll be stiffing a taxi driver who drops her off at Carlos' place on 134th so she can score. And Paula will still be attempting to speak without drooling.
34. RichPort - January 31, 2007 5:52 PM
21. Ferret! Shouldn't you be busy inventing the Internet, convincing cretins you invented the Internet, getting your ass plowed, or practicing "would you like fries with that?" for your next job interview?
35. Kate&Tina - January 31, 2007 6:38 PM
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36. CruisingForCock - January 31, 2007 6:56 PM
Fan-fucking-tastic! Kate&Tina are in the mother fucking house.
37. NicotineEyePatch - January 31, 2007 7:22 PM
#35, you're needed at perezhilton.com.
38. the chicken - January 31, 2007 7:31 PM
#37 I think they're really Mary-Kate and Ashley.
39. cayana - January 31, 2007 7:46 PM
#35 Autobiography of Kate & Tina.. thank you for sharing.
40. CruisingForCock - January 31, 2007 8:54 PM
Jesus Christ. I am all fired up and ready for an internet fight and there is no one to fight with. Kate&Tina must have found the medication. Fuck.
41. heyheyhey - January 31, 2007 9:35 PM
you know you've made it big time when YOUR OWN pr guy tells the media that what you said the day before has "no truth to it whatsoever"
42. HollyJ - January 31, 2007 10:23 PM
Sorry everyone about #35...
It's because 35's a hermaphrodite and someone was spanking its clit and ballsac at the same time. It became overwhelmed with the joy of mentally visualizing some masked stranger (TCLTC) playing with its pseuso-clit and semi-ballsac at the same time .. OH YES!!!! OH YES!!! HALLELUJAH!!!
43. Team OJ - February 1, 2007 1:57 AM
This is one of the lasting sideeffects when you get your cokefix from Kurt Cobains crying cock.
44. djfredflintstone - February 1, 2007 7:11 AM
Too bad. I'd watch that idol. On the final episode Courtney could eat Randy, Simon and the idol winner then stumble around drunkenly mumbling "I thought the show was supposed to be America's Sweetheart."
45. djfredflintstone - February 1, 2007 7:13 AM
Becasue that was the name of her last album, get it?
Oh, and something about through blood flecked lips.
46. BritneysFUCKhat - February 1, 2007 7:19 AM
Jesus God she is SCARY in the face.
47. jrzmommy♠ - February 1, 2007 7:30 AM
Damn--I was looking forward to Simon getting the snot pounded out of him by Courtney.
48. 86 - February 1, 2007 8:00 AM
21 HA!
What's going on in here?
49. misanthrope - February 1, 2007 8:24 AM
"Courtney Love is a very talented artist"
Tee Hee. Well, she's having a hard time finding someone to write her a new album.
50. Spindoc - February 1, 2007 11:36 AM
What a stupid bitch!
Ok Courtney you IDIOT, if they WERE considering dumping Paula and hiring you, the fact that you can't keep a secret probably just fucked up the deal.
That said, high doses of courtney Love are even more irritating than Paula ever was.
51. Kungfujen - February 1, 2007 12:17 PM
Her face. No, seriously, what the hell is wrong with her face?
52. HollywoodSnark - March 25, 2007 3:18 PM
well, that would definitely make for some interesting banter between her and simon!
53. Hew Jadick - July 26, 2008 11:15 PM
I think Courtney Love isn't a very nice person. Her myspace page clearly threatens
anyone with having their myspace page deleted if they post anything negative on her site.
Gee Wiz...thats a little negative in the first place no in't it?
Hmph...Perhaps a big hug is what she needs...
Yeah thats it...
Big hug...
54. oy - April 15, 2009 4:02 PM
BigTimeCrazy™