first
first
first

This turn of events should come as no surprise to anyone except Kevin himself.

http://glossedover.com

MWA HA HA

I'll see if it he sends me a plane ticket and $1000, but that's my bottom line.

Zero. Also the result of his IQ test.

At what point can I begin to feel sorry for him? I'm getting close.

yea he is kinda a zero isnt he

hahaha that is actually the most pathetic thing ive seen.

His life continues to get better

http://www.celebslam.com

I am LOVING it. Now, if we can just get dubbya to move to paraguay. the apocalyse is coming!

Poor Britney. He's giving his goodies away free to us poor slobs but she had to pay for it. TWICE! Karma is a bitch when she bites you in the ass, Brit!

Price of return airline ticket to Chicago: $1,100

Price of cab from O'Hare International Airport to downtown: $55

Price of hotel in proximity to House of Blues: $149

Price of ticket to Fed-Ex-Earl show: $0

Being in a close enough proximity to Earl so that I can fling a beer bottle at his retarded head: Priceless.

I "performed" once inside the House of Blues in Chicago. I charged Long Island Ice Teas.

and please let it be an empty house still. just to add to his downward spiral I'm beginning to refer to as K-FEDS HAPPY DANCE TO HELL

He can have his ticket lolo

http://exposed-celebs.blogspot.com/

lol...you know what....jesus TANGO dancing christ =) I...don't even really know what to say to this. To tell you the truth..I would of gone for free and threw the video tape of her blowjob at him "this is how it use to be" then throw a picture of some random 180 lady with C sized tits and a huge nose at him, "this is how it's going to be".

DAMMIT, if not for my clunky OS9 G3 Mac, a dialup account, and typekey always forgetting I'm already registered, I coulda been first.

Not a big deal, it just would be special for me, y'know?

As far as Kfed is concerned, I don't think there's anything cute we can add to this.

It's perfect. All we can do is bask in its light.

180 pound lady*

November 7th & 8th are redletter days for K-Fed!

Redletter:
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/redletter

well...180 pound...180 years old..no matter. =D

I don't know what else I can say about the Popofag at this point.

'cept eat shit and die, in no particular order.

Well, not to worry, I am sure he will make out on getting some money by selling their sex tapes.

http://www.holisticwisdom.com

Why should he charge people to see him "rap"?

It's not like he needs the money. He is, after all, getting millions in the divorce settlement.

Great Next Career Moves for Kevin Federline

1. Personal Assistant to Naomi Campbell
2. Celebrity Boxing Match with Mike Tyson
3. Pete Doherty?s Person al Phlebotomist
4. Chicken Coop Cleaner in Indonesia or VietNam
5. Outspoken Democracy Advocate in Terhan

AM I FIRST?! LOLERZSKATEZ!!!!!!!!!

@22, oh, he's gonna need some money alright, the way he "rolls." This dirtbag is prolly gonna take a one time payment or some kind of annuity . How much you wanna bet he's still gonna go to Vegas with his faggot troupe of "buds," until he spends it all.

The worse thing than being poor, is to have been rich and then be poor.

Whatever he does next, I hope it involves a Tequila and Tranquilizer cocktail and a swan dive from a 10th story balcony.

23. 6. The Surreal Life!!!!

I couldn't possibly pass up the chance to see the most ridiculed man in America for free three blocks from where I work the day after his wife divorces him. Bring it, K-Fed, bring it.

suicide is too thoughtful, self-loathing, and shit for this dudebroah, hey, hey, ya ya ya, yo, buy my cd, yo.

no one will one him as a backupdancer now.

he's going to have to sell that $40,000 watch to a casino, I bet, just to keep going in craps one of these days... I mean, this weekend.

I hope he does the same thing for the show @ HoB in Hollywood! If he does, I'm soooo there.

Number of people to show up to free Kevin Federline concert- 0

At least my life didn't spiral out of control like this after my "Dear John" text message. I just threw his toothbrush in the trash and moved on. That's how I roll.

A year from now he won't even be able to get on the Surreal Life.

Hey, if I were this particular douchebag I'd thank my lucky stars for having had a semi-good run on the gravy train, take the money, move to some place like Alaska (or any place were the living is cheaper) and just play video games and watch porn for the rest of my life.

I'm thinking of doing exactly this

He's trying to be a rapper because rappers need ZERO talent. AND I MEAN ZERO!!!

don't you suckas recognize? earl is priceless.

i feel sorry for artists that have a ticket price. madonna's tickets were a hundred dollars. hell, that makes her no better than the average escort. kfed is in a league of his own.

It's not like he needs the money. He is, after all, getting millions in the divorce settlement.

Wrong. He gets $300,000 for each year married. That's $600,000 and no community assets. I think she's letting him keep the ferrari though. Tard.

# 9 He might end up in Paraguay, but apparently Don Rumsfeld has been seen in Patagonia scoping out the old Martin Bormann estate.

#28 - you so have to go to that.. Yell taunts at him and then come back and tell us what happened... If i lived in Chicago I would get 10 of my friends together, supply them with booze, and bring a video camera... Sweet Jesus would we be rolling in the dough when all the tabloids got the footage of us chanting "Go K-Fag, Go K-Fag, Go K-Fag" Can I get whoop whoop?...

37 - try again...
$30,000 per month for 1/2 the time they were together... So $360,000 there... Any items over 10K get returned to the gifter. Half the value of the Malibu house (valued at $10M)so that is another $5 million. She is allowing him all the proceeds from their stupid reality show. Once he cock-blocks over custody, she will throw in another $1M to get rid of him forever. He should pocket a cool $6.5 million before taxes....

Yeah, this is not the Best Week Ever for old K-Fag. Poor, poor wigger. BUT all my pretties, I KNOW that there will be some dumb Hollywood slunt there to let him leach off her. Oh, Guess what Shar's doin' tonight.... Now SHE's having the Best Week Ever!

He will blame Britney for all of this too. Because she filed for divorce no one wants to see his "show"

If I wanted to see a creepy guy yelling Hey 50 times, I would walk past the mexican guy that works at my building.

#40

House issue was probably covered by the pre-nup. If it wasn't, I'd sell the motherfucker for fifteen bucks and give him his half.

#40 you know all the stories about the guy who wins the Lotto, thinks he's on top of the world, then it turns out he doesn't know shit about managing money, hangs out with a bunch of losers. Then he's in debt, tries to pull of an armed robbery with a dude named "Tommy" who then rats him out. The lotto winner ends up in Pound Me in The Ass Chatanooga Correctional Facility giving blowjobs for a pack'o smokes from a black guy named Trey.

He's THAT GUY

Ah, sweet Schadenfreude.

The only thing that could make this day better would be if Airforce 1 crashed in Paris Hilton.

And Perez Hilton. Fucking fat faggot.

Everything that I have seen suggests that the house was in both of their names as a community asset. Supposedly they split it based upon value not sale price unfortunately... So she looks like she will definitely have to buy him out for some serious cash... However, at 20 million, getting away from that waste of space woudl be worth it....

I seriously doubt Britney's handlers would let her make such a stupid move as buying the house as a community asset after they worked out such a robust pre-nup. Has anybody seen the deed?

#46

There are many ways to get around that pesky community property law; this I know.

Obviously he'll blow it all with his peeps, a la MC Hammer.

#47

Britney may be a dumb hick, but her handlers aren't. They're gonna keep their little gravy train on the right track.

It also occurs to me that these properties might be mortagaged up the ying-yang, if so he's probably gonna get half the equity only. Stick that up your ass faggot.

*mortgaged

sorry

Fish - PLEASE provide #28 with a reserved spot for a post so that we can get a full report on how bad the K-Earl show was.
I can't wait for the Pollstar numbers to come out next month. He may be the lowest grossing artist of the year.
And for all of you still arguing over K-Earl's divorce settlement, please remember that he has 2 other kids from a previous relationship, so when he banks his $$$ another court summons should instantly appear for him regarding increased child support payments to Shar.

This whole situation should make every atheist in America a believer now - There is a God, and he does render justice onto those who deserve it.

#47

I've looked for her pre-nup. All I can come up with is the "faux" marriage agreement. If you have to have a "faux" marriage agreement, is it really a good idea to get married?

Awww...I kinda liked Brits downhill sprial..especially the time she cried.

#54 you said it.

The level of income she was bringing in at that time made her a target for losers like this scumbag. She could've just shacked-up with him, the end result would've been the same but less expensive.

I'd just like to say thankyou to those of you American's who voted yesterday. Thankyou for taking some power of that mental president of yours. You have No Idea how big the sigh of relief the rest of the world breathed when that happened!!!!

And I agree with # 53

Commissioner and others... Here are the prenup details per US magazine 2005...
http://www.bestweekever.tv/2006/11/07/sizzer-brit-k-feds-pre-nup-details/

#56

I looked at the "pre-nup" Punjab directed me to. I agree with you; if she was smart, the Casa La Spearderline was mortgaged up to her moneymaker.

I met plenty o' guys like him before I was remarried. Always looked at my shoes then asked how much money I made. Usually before asking my name.

#60
So how the hell IS my ex-boyfriend, and did he like your shoes?

Hahaha he loses the Ferrari, it should be summarily crushed as it has been tainted.

On the other hand, it's very generic to say he gets 1/2 the house, is the house paid for? I mean these people aren't buying houses cash, the taxes alone would bury you. You need to carry some debt with real estate (at least where I live)

#61

I told him he couldn't afford me after he told me he "trained horses" for a living. (In my neck of the woods, "training horses" means unemployed and living with your sister.)

i'm sure shar is experiencing a catch 22 right now. while she is elated that this cheating ass scumbag is getting dumped...at the dame time she has to be bummed that brit's not paying his child support anymore. i wouldn't doubt if shar is calling brit herself begging her to take kevin back.

#62

I'm telling ya, I bet she owes on that house. No way would her handlers allow her to pay cash for real estate. I'd love to see the look on Kevvy's face when he's told his Amex card "has been declined".

#63
Damn, that little fucker's lost another job! He used to be a "consultant", but only idiots from Louisiana still fall for that one.

#66
And don't everybody from the great state of LA get on my ass, you know who I mean.

#66

Yep, another one of my favorites. "Consultant".

My daddy used to say, "never trust a man who wears a suit to a bar". He said they were either a drug dealer or a car salesman.

Those bar hoppin' days are over for me now. It used to be amusing to hop out of my "sin wagon" (hot little sportscar) and watch the idiot "consultants" point and make plans for later.

#68
My daddy just told me get the cash up front, and to this day I swear I don't know what he meant by that.
Out here in LA those who aren't consultants are all "working on my screenplay". Uh-HUH.

LMAO...

I too am sure a Mortgage is involved... The split is half the vlue if you sold tomorrow and paid off the note... So YESLMAO...

I too am sure a Mortgage is involved... The split is half the vlue if you sold tomorrow and paid off the note... So YES

WTF? WHere is the rest of my post? THere were like 5 more sentences!!!! You suck FISH!!

Anyway, here they are...

Yes, you are correct...
He may not be getting a big $5M lump if the mortgage is huge adn the equity is small. That would be awesome... We can hope...

#72
The rest of your post will show up 5 days from now with the rest of the late breaking news. Let's hope Casa Feddy has a triple or fourple mortgage!

i wonder if fed-ex is still cool with everybody hating him.

#64-we have a cat named Nipsy Russell. Are you, in fact, a cat?

#75---nipsy russell was a black man. so really you own a black man. shame on you. you can own a black baby but owning a black man is so colonial. we don't do that anymore.

This just in...FED-EX has filed for custody and spousal support. Wigger just ain't got no pride 'yo....

#76-How do I know I can trust you? You were obviously a huge 'Liars Club' fan, to have chosen to honor one of that show's late, great alumni with your screen name....you'll suck me in with your romantic memories of colonial slave-trading, and then everyone will laugh when you reveal that your ideas are actually a corn-shucker from the late 1800's.

77-any fool can see that he really needs to sue for pride support. And wife-beater reparations.

Now he'll be worth what he dresses like: shit.

What's the opposite of sold-out? Sold-in? If so, this concert will be sold-in even at these prices... let's see, what do I have to do that night... coat my pubic hair in honey and sit on a fire ant's mound... stick my ass in a polar bear fence... wrestle a pack of bikers with only a spork and my faith in Xenu... wear a "Guns Suck!" t shirt to the next NRA rally... tell a pack of steroid-laden psycho lesbians to go iron my fucking clothes you bitches... convince liberals Jesus picked Dubya... visit Amish land with a bottle of anti-depressants and machete... there are any number of things I'd rather do than see Earl for free...

Right on #57
No one died when Clinton lied.

See? That's exactly what I said. I KNEW they were giving his tickets to homeless people in the hopes of having someone show up.
Shelter is a big draw these days. Even if they do have to put up with the noise.

57, 81- a friend just sent this to me. The similarities are uncanny.
So, anyway, I was in Stockholm Sweden, and went to this museum that was
built around a big warship built in the 17th century by the King of Sweden
at the time. The boat had sunk in Stockholm harbor and was actually lifted
out of the water in the 1960's and now sits in it's complete state in a huge
museum.

Well, anyway, along with the huge boat, they also had a nice installation
about life in Sweden during the 17th century. At the time, as with most
European countries, the people were in a state of abject poverty, and of
course, the royals were living large.

I was immediately struck by one placard in the installation that explained
that , even though the country and it's peoples were totally poor and
dealing with plague, and famine, The King of Sweden, Gustav Vasa was
insisting that the people should be more concerned about the threat of an
invasion from Poland... Poland! can you imagine?

The king of Sweden of course spent vast amounts of money on fighting this
war in Poland against the Polish. I am sure at the time he used lines like
"We must fight the enemy there, so that we do not have to fight them here!"

Of course, the people of Sweden in the end suffered from it (as well I am
sure, the people of Poland)

So in his endeavor to fight the evil Poles and everyone else he deemed a
threat to Sweden, he built what he thought was going to be the largest and
most deadly warship in Europe.

The ship had three rows of Cannons. Compared to the normal one or two rows
of cannons on most warships at the time. The king had ordered this, against
the recommendations of the ship designers and senior naval commanders.

As the boat left the dock on its maiden voyage, it sailed only half a mile
and then a strong wind came and the boat listed, with the weight of all the
cannons, it started to list so much that it eventually sank to the bottom of
Stockholm harbor. It had only sailed for less than half an hour.

In the end, no one was punished or reprimanded for the sinking, not one
admiral, not one designer, not one official...

I guess we never learn do we?

Apparently not... and I see Democrats have won the other house. Does that mean Bush will be able to do anything at all or is everything going to have to go through the opposition??

While I realize it may be poor form to comment on another article's "comments," I must say that I am absolutely DISGUSTED by the number of people rejoicing about this divorce. Don't get me wrong, I am all for warrented celebrity bashing, especially when it concerns free-loading mother-fuckers, but celebrating ANY divorce is just sickening. Marriage is sacred! Why is it funny to laugh at the destruction of one of the world's oldest, holiest, and most respected institutions?

#85 you make a good point, but in Britney's case how "sacred" is marriage, really?
Two words: Jason Alexander. And I don't mean the fat guy from Seinfeld.

I was so going to go to the show tonight (I actually considered paying the $25 to see who would actually attend KFeds crap ass show) but the gym sounded like a much better idea...So #28 please let us know how it turned out and even he even showed his sorry ass face.

OK fishheads, sorry to disappoint, but when I got there House of Blues informed me that the tickets were only free until 4 and then they went back to their regular price. I pity Earl, but not enough to shell out $27. Maybe the next time he comes through and plays at the mall I can catch him for nothing...

so sad fedex...so sad...apparently NW law was representing at HoB...how pathetic.

I remember a while back I was watching some stupid movie called "True Romance". It had Christian Slater (drug-addled, alcoholic bone smuggler) and that butt-ugly sister to a tranny Patricia Arquette.

Anyway, the only reason I was watching this flick was because some dumb broad I was with thought it was all romantic and I figured that if I feigned interest I might get her to touch my fun stuff (mission accomplished, by the way).

The only part of the movie I remember is that there was this wigger in it, back before there really was such a thing as wiggers (early nineties). I remember thinking, "man, that fucking white guy pretending to be black is totally annoying and retarded."

If I remember correctly, Slater blows the wigger's brains out. Or maybe he just beats the shit out of him. Either way, the wigger got fucked up.

That part was cool, cuz I hate fucking wiggers.

Word.

#85 Im sorry but I just cant associate the words "holy" "sacred" and "respected" with these two assclowns. "Institution", definitely since that is where someone as delusional as him belongs. Way to go, Had-her-poon.

Behold, through the miracle of google:

http://www.moviedeaths.com/true_romance/drexl_spivey

Wigger got his balls blown off and then capped in the head.

Now if only someone would do that to Fed-Ex.

#85: which century do you live in? Marriage is only 'sacred' to religious people and even THEY get divorced. Marriage was a necessity in the old days so women were protected. (AND people didn't live so long, so they didn't need to put up with each other's crap for too many years). Marriage nowadays is a luxury that most people don't take seriously. Move with the times, girl!

#95
Well, even if I am old-fashioned and idealistic, don't you still see my point? It's really sad and unfortunate for all parties involved, especially the kids. All I am saying is that divorce is never funny and shouldn't be celebrated, even if the parties involved are, in fact, ass-clowns.
Also, I realize that marriage may be a "religious" institution, but people still do it all the time (I bet you've either done it or want to do it yourself someday), and when they do it, they make a PROMISE to each other that they are going to stay together. When is breaking promises funny?

Despite all of this, I still think that Spears is a talentless bimbo (with good lawyers) and FedEx is a worthless piece of white-trash shit. I wouldn't be so put off by all those divorce business if they hadn't had offspring...

Er, #93 i mean. not 95. 95 doesn't exist yet. My bad.

But now it does. Okay I am done talking now.

I have no idea what he's going to do for a living, as I doubt even the gay porn industry wants his ugly mug in their movies.

http://chasingculture.com/liberty/index.php

#97
What's the snuff film industry's best offer?

#90
Speaking of wigger movies, "Malibu's Most Wanted" made me want to dig my eyes out of my head with a rusty fork.

#98

2 dollars more than he's making now.

...which would be 2 dollars.

http://chasingculture.com/liberty/index.php

Brilliant stuff people, and proof that you can in fact squeeze blood out of a stone.

If the cruise industry ever sees the benefits of having bad rappers instead of just bad singers in their itinerary of performances, Text-Dumped Earl may yat have quite a prosperous future. Of course that be open justification for the Coast Guard to gun down any ships not registered in the US, so choose your cruises carefully people.

In fact, fuck it, he got dumped on his Sidekick? He is now officially Sidekick Earl.

Big Jim--True Romance was an awesome film! The whole scene with Dennis Hopper and Christopher Walken, when Hopper is explaining how the Sicilians are decendants of the Moors? And Gary Oldman as the wigger pimp? One of the most quotable movies ever made. dude, watch it again, it's a classic.

OK so this morning I heard he gets to keep the Ferrari (who'd want anyhting else with his name on it) and Jewelry.

He is ballsy going for spousal support & full custody. Either his lawyer is dillusional as he is or there is a loophole in the pre-nup.

Oh and she's planning to do her comback in Vegas.
Sorry if this is old news- I am still getting through yesterday's posts.

True Romance is among my favorites:

Drexl Spivey: He must have thought it was white boy day. It ain't white boy day, is it?
Marty: No man, It ain't white boy day.

It ain't 'white boy day' for Sidekick Earl either...

Rich: We got ourselves a motherfuckin' Charlie Bronson! A real cru-say-dah.

and Brad Pitt as the stoner smoking out of the Honey Bear. LOVE IT!!!

HA!!

Marty: He's askin' about Alabama.
Drexl Spivey: Where the fuck is that bitch?
Clarence Worley: She's with me.
Drexl Spivey: Who the fuck are you?
Clarence Worley: I'm her husband.
Drexl Spivey: [Laughs] Well, that makes us practically related.

I repeated that last line for years...

Most awesome fight scene ever?....James Gandolfini v. Patricia Arquette...hands down. And when I say ever I mean EVER!!!

So sad that he's even tainting the HOB with his presence.

If we all give him $2 will he go away?

jrz:

Sorry, but Slater and Arquette make me wants to kick puppies. I do vaguely remember the Dennis Hopper scene as being cool:

"So your great great great great great grandmother, fucked a nigger, and had a half nigger kid, which means that you, are part eggplant."

@98:

Thanks a fucking lot. I laughed so hard that coffee came out my nose and now I've got it all over my shirt.

Bitch.

It's the fall of Vanilla Ice once again. I've seen it already, I'm changing the channel now.

BigJim, Hi, I must say the at movie True Romance has one of the hottest sex scene ever. When he does her in the phone booth, I thhink my panties were just a little bit wet. I wish to be tagged in this way.

Jim & Jrz - I think the biggest point being missed is that all the Black people, even the blonkey, died quickly in that movie. Sam Jackson lasted about 17 seconds... In fact, even the guy that brought up Black people, Dennis Hopper, became a cantelope... coincidence???

#110
Why do men always blame their drinking problems on women?

Wet t-shirt contest going on at BigJim's!

True Romance is right up there with Reservoir Dogs and Boondock Saints.

And Fedex only filed for full custody so BS will triple her settlement offer and make him go away. It's a ploy.

Awwwww. I watch True Romance every chance I get. I loved Val Kilmer as Elvis, giving Clarence advice in the bathroom.

Classic movie.

#115

He lawyered up, which was a huge mistake. He's only going to end up with what he agreed in the pre-nup; nothing more, nothing less; except he'll end up giving it to his attorney. He'll end up pawning shit and selling "his story" to the tabloids to finance a no-win legal battle.

I am trying to look for the words to "Popozao" cuz one of the Bosses was telling me how horendously gay that song is and I don't think I have grasped the magnitude of the horror that is Popozao.

2 Questions that I wonder
1. Does Fag-EX play Popozao at his "shows"
2. Where can I find a breakdown of that song?

I will hit google now

"Girl don't worry about the dough, cuz a cat is comin straight outta the know"

WTH?! Hahhahhhhhahahhah shit

I don't know how many of you all have read or seen this but it is hilarious. The stupidest, worst, gayest most ridiculous song ever has been written in our time. Popozao

#119 “At first, when I put out PopoZao, people were kinda laughing at me. I did it on purpose so people would look at me exactly the way they did. That way, when I come out with my real s**t, people are f**king blown away.”

It's kinda like when my cat falls off the TV or something and then gives me that "I meant to do that" look.
I believe it then, too.

I like the way Earl plays the air piano in his video... that's fucking fire!

#121
Shit, I thought it was a seizure. My bad.

Wow, surprising his music career isn't working out that well.

BREAKING NEWS:

K-Fed's CD just went aluminum!

He should of saw this coming. Making a mockery of himself, pretty much humiliating himself. At this point anyone who goes to those shows are there for sympathy support. Oh well.