Nov 6 2006Eva Longoria wishes she was made of bronze

its probably partly b/c of the dress too but she does look really fake

shes got the victoria beckham hair-cut as=-well

* as-well

Oh good, I was hoping someone would revive the monochromatic look last seen on Mariah Carey.

http://glossedover.com

no wait she hasnt, the front jus looks like it,

She still looks good in bronze.

last comment (promise) i bet you all hate me dont you

Who could blame Christian Bale for looking like he wants to go all American Psycho on this pig in that last picture. I would pay to fund a sequel where he killed all of these spunkbuckets we spew about on the 'fish everyday.

*Note: And I would have sex with him. hard.

Her 'head for the border taco face' really irritates me. Am I the only one?

She would look better in bronze with white splotches located near her neck and face, preferably on her lips.

Her stylist should be fired. And if she doesn't have one, she should be killed.

Dress is too big, hair is too flat, lipcolor is awful. She's no Eva Mendes, that's for sure.

It does look like Christian Bale is leering at her in the last pic.

I
Would
Hit
That

I
Would
Hit
That

I
Would
Hit
That

It's no wonder all these celeb guys are gay... all the chicks in hollywood look like drag queens.

That was a lame excuse for a caption Mr Fish.

For an 'older' lady, she looks doable.

melanin

@10 - Are you talking about Popping-A-Hot-Nut on her?

Her shoes are tacky.

But then again, so is her skin.

Can't blame her. She needs to be pretty tanned so that he mustache blends in.

The shoes are way cute, but not with that dress. And she has too much mascara on her bottom lashes! And......she sure aint no Eva Mendes.......Try harder Bitch!

I'm wearing those shoes today, with a black suit.

I'll be wearing the white splotches later, after seven.

"Dress is too big, hair is too flat, lipcolor is awful. She's no Eva Mendes, that's for sure."
I agree, Commish. She's trying her hardest, but it's not just easy being a midget.

"just not" - Duh!

Ferret-

Stop it right now, you know you wouldn't touch that with a ten foot pole.
Remember the pic of her without her makeup on? How can you expect to keep it up in the shower with a face like that?

kisses

-D.

i've never understood the big deal about her. she has no chest, and in this pic she looks like a walk-on part for Star-Trek:In Search of Splooge.

p.s. what a bitch trying to steal victoria's look. I would pop a cap in her ass....

I'm surprised she can even keep her eyes open with all the fake lashes and 10 tons on mascara on. And that dress is ugly.
I seriously fucking hate Mondays.

Don't like the hair.

who the hell thinks Eva Mendes is hot????? Oh my christ, she is a cross between cindy crawford and a man. Which is a cross between a tranny & man. Which makes her a manny.

HATE IT!!

Never been a big fan of hers anyway.

Um, she IS hispanic.

@8 Amen to the part about Christian Bale. I'm looooving the fact that he and Hugh Jackman are in a movie together. Haven't seen it, but am filing it away for a horny day.

She looks like Posh's clone.

Spanish people are supposed to be brown. Any post about her that doesnt contain nudity is BORING!!

I'd still hit it

http://www.celebslam.com

Okay, she may be having a slightly off day, but come on you freaky people, she is a hot little number!! I read something that said she loves to orgasm so she could run with me anytime. She seems fun and like a partying chic.

*PrettyBaby's Pink Ribbonly Bubbly FanClub*

#29 - I'm with you on that one biatcho.

I wouldn't kick her out of bed unless she was better on the floor.
She's porno hot - that's all that matters.

I wonder if the other celebs make her clean their dressing rooms first...

Her shoes would love great if they were resting on my ears... but I'd have to get a spackle knife to remove that quarter inch of Loreal...

#29 - Case in point biatcho.

http://img130.imagevenue.com/view.php?image=42587_eva_mendes0048_122_345lo.jpg

I used to think she was pretty until I saw a picture of her without makeup. Now I can't get that image out of my mind no matter how much make up she has on. All I see is a chicuahua in a brown dress. I also don't like the highlights in her hair either. Some people look better with dark hair. She also needs some color on her lips if she's going to be all brown.

eva longoria gave me a blumpkin

huh? www.carpemundus.com

eva longoria gave me a blumpkin

huh? www.carpemundus.com

She looks fine to me. Isn't that what her skins supposed to look like? If superficial guy didn't headline it like that i wouldn't have even noticed.

She's a hottie for her age and you all know it! :)

http://www.flash-screen.com/free-wallpaper/imgs/1287.jpg

eva longoria gave me a blumpkin

huh? www.carpemundus.com

I think she'd only suck a cock if she thought a fried banana was coming out of it.

ok, so she didn't...sue me

sorry for the multiple posts :(

www.carpemundus.com

#44

Hot for her age? It's not like she's sixty, for crying out loud.

jrzmommy must have gotten booked with Calvin Broadus.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20061106/ap_en_ot/people_snoop_dogg

hollywood standards, she's as old as my grandma. id throw her a courtesy

www.carpemundus.com

DM - You're right. I hadn't had my mocha when I typed that. You know I only have eyes for WisconSIN gurlz!

#44 & 48 - She's in need of a moustache wax!

http://www.shareapic.net/content.php?id=316149&owner=blarg

hey, is fuck.monkey one word or two?

OK: one word r.e. the photo: fuck.monkey

I think she looks good except for.... the fake eyelashes... the ugly dress... and her hair looks like crap with the way the collar was designed on the dress.... but I like her shoes... but not with that.....

'stache wax, brain?? Bitch needs a sideburn wax!!! I am horrified.

Now that I think of it, she looks like Gary Shandling in this picture...

#52 - nothings wrong with a bit of willy tickler :)
Actually thats gross - indeed she could do with a good old lip wax.

#52, Are you volunteering, Cuz I have something nice and soooo soft for you to wax!

Damn I am slutty today

Brain- the twenty-two inch monitor view was pretty scary. she is hairy indeedy.

58 - But you sound Pretty.. baby?

The slutty kind of pretty.

whites are attractive. minorities - yuck.

let's make fun of a latina for having brown skin...hahahahahaha...that's HILARIOUS...and by hilarious, I mean the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

@59 commissioner - At least there's no hair in her nose!

That is one dumpy dress. Whoever decided that a too-long, brown, wrinkly satin dress with a cheesy plastic belt was the perfect look for a movie premiere needs to be fired. Now.

I don't remember making fun of someone with brown skin, but I will rip on poochy-looking bitch with too much fake tanner and the remnants of a moustache. Even non-famous women have the just plain courtesy to nair once and a while.

#60 MMmmmmm... Intelligent men...

#61 HUH?!

One of my bosses leaned over my shoulder and looked at Eva's pic and offered this golden nugget "I'd run one into her."

Ta Ta Toothy.

Brain- no kidding.

Mr. Commissioner said once, "I'd throw some mule juice at 'er".

I did tell him if he ever referred to semen as "mule juice" again, it'd be a cold day in hell before I'd swallow.

#66 did he grind his dick on your back?

I will repeat what I said about Alyssa Milano several posts ago- I'd bend that over and introduce her to my UltraVibe 3000- but ONLY after I waxed the crack of her ass. Can't have her shorty-n-curlies mucking up my battery-powered funstick!
Oh- Christian Bale + Hugh Jackman= a movie that will fuel my wet dreams for a month.

#69 Nice number

They always try, Always.

#70 Hey Darlin, do you know that this is another ethnic lady here NOT Alyssa Milano. But go on with you fantasy if you must....

I don't see the problem.
She looks good, in these pictures.

I think soon celebs will just start spray painting themselves like in the movie Death Becomes Her.

http://www.holisticwisdom.com

I went to the salon the other day and said "I want to look like a piece of Horse Shit". The beautician showed me a picture of Eva Longoria. I said, "no, not a shit-colored horse, a piece of horse shit". We agreed on a picture of danielle's mother.

she looks fine, what is wrong with you people?

Isn't she Mexican ?
So, as opposed to English Beckham, isn't that normal that Eva's tanned ??

She looks like a Mexican dingleberry.
mmmmmmm
*shitty*

Yeah right, if you think that's how she looks, you should see how she REALLY looks like here:

http://www.niquehappy.com/blog/2006/11/05/eva-longoria-without-makeup/

I'm pretty sure it's "wishes she were..."

I'm pretty sure this has been covered, but she has a pretty sturdy/storm-proof 'stache.

Tho, I'd still hit rock it like a hurricane.

And:

pale > disgustingly overly-tanned

Ugh.

http://chasingculture.com/liberty/index.php

Slater didn't seem to mind hitting that a few weeks ago after dancin his star away.

He fucked it up with the hot russian partner of his.

#29 - brain embolism - Are you saying that's Eva Mendez? Because I could swear it's Mary Louise Parker.

Skönflicka et al . . . yes, it's perfectly normal for a person of Latin descent or origin to be brown. It's NOT normal, however, for themto be ORANGE.

Brown does not equal orange.

Plus the shininess is weird.

Uh...I feel awful......I had to go home sick yesterday.....I think I have Longoria or something. My skin is all brown and splotchy and my clothes are hanging off of me, and I have a bizarre craving for Tamales.

I'm pretty sure she was born that color...or something at least close to it.

it's not the skin tone per se, it's that i associate it with somebody cleaning a toilet. so i'd let her give me a blumpkin. if she wants to get all dressed up for it, fine.

Shes a fug nasty untalented skank ho who makes Paris Hilton smell good.

she reminds me of the taco bell dog

Wow. Her hair must have taken HOURS.

*cough*

she is just not attractive to me.

LOL, this is way old, but I couldn't resist.

I bet you all making bad comments are ugly as hell in reality! The girls are jealous and the guys are hermits. YOu guys are HATERS, cause you'll never have what they have. The only thing attractive about Paris Hilton, is her money, but she's still a little player that gets what she wants. Eva Mendez and Eva Longoria are way beyond you alls level. I can honestly only picture Yeti looking Sun reflecting apes talking out of lonliness and jealously. You guys put white people to shame. I wouldn't doubt the majority of you all look like the characters from the HIlls Have Eyes!!....except very very white LOL

yeah, give her a few years.....she's already old and over the hill