September 18, 2006

Nicole Richie tries to hide

I don't know much about looking inconspicuous, but I do know waving a giant handbag in front of your face isn't the way to go about it. If Nicole Richie was a spy all the other spies would infiltrate the office building dressed like potted plants and she'd show up in a giant baked potato costume.

More of Nicole Richie trying pathetically to hide herself after the jump.

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» Jessica Simpson pretends to shop for groceries
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Comments

all she'd need to do is pull an old cartoon trick... hide behind a tree. or jump off a bridge.

In the first picture it looks like her friend has to hold her up because the weight of the bag is almost too much for her...

Maybe she should get bigger sunglasses, then her face would be entirely shielded from the papparazi. They wouldn't know whether to take picture or swat her with the world's biggest fly swatter.

If she wanted to hide, all she needed to do is turn sideways. She'd disappear, like Olive Oyl.

pretty soon she'll be able to hide behind a strand of dental floss.

Against her non-existent frame, that Brikin suddenly looks like it's too big to even qualify as a carry-on.

More importantly, why is she dressed for winter? It's mid-September people. In LA, no less.

Ugh, and again with the pirate-tucking-boots-into-pants thing.

How hard is it for a string bean to hide behind anything?

She could hide behind a sheet of looseleaf, turned on its side. I hope the heels of those boots are filled with lead weights because it looks kinda breezy out there. Fat bitch.

well actually, if you are the nickster and there is no endoscopilogical proof that any food products you may APPEAR to consume actually pass thru your digestive tract.. well then yes, you can hide behind a purse.. and truthfully you can even hide behind a popsicle stick.. or a length of yarn.. or even a number two eberhard faber pencil..

I think that's her makeup in that bag because I don't think she's wearing any.

I doubt she can barely hold her head up with the fricking huge sunglasses. How does manages to lift that bag, I do not know. What I DO know is that her Skeletor fingers really creep me out.

http://myspace.com/ihateperezhilton

J-mommy

That's kind-of the point I was trying to make. You just said it better.

Those are some serious E.T. fingers.

I wonder if she can make her neck 18 inches long and tongue my ass from across the room?

I want to know why she hasn't snapped in half, yet

Why doesn't she just try hiding IN the bag?

Why haven't they posted the story about when she went to the hospital?

Supposedly, she was at a pool hall and was mistaken for a cue. I've heard of women "breaking balls", but this shit had to hurt............

Hey - I think she looks ok in that table cloth.

She is just embarrased because she finished an entire Ritz cracker by herseslf.

WTF? Who the hell cares about this no talent, moron.

I just might eat more than an ice cube and a couple of pieces of lettuce for lunch after seeing these pics.

She should get this bag it is alot bigger or even a Louis Vuitton trunk:

http://www.sybarites.org/2006/08/08/louis-vuitton-stamped-bag-gm/

I hear she's planning on visiting some refugee camps at Darfur so she can prove how fat she really is.

It's impossible for her to hide those fat legs...

Either her sunglasses are getting bigger with each day or her head continues to shrink. I'm going with the latter.

She must've been having a bad weight day. She just ate a Ritz cracker and took a sip of water and bloated right up. Those glasses are actually normal frames, Nicole's become so emaciated she's down to toddler wear. She's dressed for winter because she no longer has subcutaneous fat deposits to warm her body from the elements. She's so sparse, Ethiopians wouldn't bother eating her.

She doesn't need to keep losing weight- what's the point? She's still really fucking ugly. That poncho is ugly too. She doesn't need a bigger bag- she needs a donkey punch

It looks like the wind is blowing her away.

http://www.celebslam.com

Shame. If you were as enormous as Nicole, you'd be embarressed too.

'OMG!! I gained 5 ounces! Don't let them see me! Argh!'

I know I was a little "high" Saturday night, but I swear when I limbo'd under the pole, Nicole was looking down at me.

Why doesn't she hide behind her fame/career??? Oh thats right, it's getting thinner than she is.

Calling her career thin is a compliment considering her claim to fame is being Paris Hilton's sidekick on a reality TV show. Paris Hilton's herps have a better career and will certainly have more longevity!!!

I in no way feel sorry for this chick. She asked for the attention, and now she's gotten it. So her blaming the press for all the "stress" it's causing her and the lack of eating as a result of it is her fault. I don't hear the bitch complaining whe she gets free shit and gets access into everything.

she looks like a little Italian boy.

Someone needs to put some laxatives in her water so she can shit out her intestines and die already.

I covet her wrap though. Stupid, skinny rich bitch.

#35. They always look better on the hanger. (Nicole Ritchie in this case)

Why can't these washed up losers disappear? Or at least sign up for their own retarded VH1 reality show, which is worse than disappearing?


http://www.edquartersaudio.com


Hey Nicole - when you're so thin that a medical class can use your body to study bone structure, you're anorexic. Period.

Really - that top picture? I haven't seen elbows like that since learning about the Holocaust.

I think if she were to have sex with anyone who is not hung like a flea, she'd split clear up the middle! Maybe Tommy Lee can just do it and put us all out of our misery.

Eewww! Nicole's hair is looking mighty nappy. I guess she is black after all.

#40, I was thinking the same thing! Her hair looks like black (African) hair in these pictures! Who knew?

Has she ever said what her background is? Half black, half white? Just wondering.

#40 - What the F kind of comment is that?

Anorexic's have sh*tty hair because of malnutrition.


Give me a freaking break, first they want to be famous and now their hiding behind bags?? Whatever!!! Hollywood is so full of shit it's sickening. It's not even Hot outside and she's wearing that thing. Look at the girl with her; she's dressed up for a completely different season... Nicole, Paris, Lindsay, all these whores need to stop being so spoiled and be grateful they are even acknowledged!

@33 I didn't think she looked like your husband at all, but if you say so........

I expected better from you, that comment was like our President, a big disappointment.....................

Fortunately for her, she actually is emaciated enough to hide behind that massive bag. Perhaps her dramatic weight loss is merely a way to evade the paparazzi.

http://glossedover.com

Ewwww, look at her elbow! Ew, ew, ew!

we have a winner folks, our 2006 Hide-and-seek champion. Now you see her, now you don't...

#13 – Do I smell an Andrew Dice Clay reference?

I can't remember why people are so interested in this girl?

Oh, that is right it is her father's stardom, she has done nothing just like her old buddy Paris.

http://www.holisticwisdom.com

The POST recently had an item insinuating that Lindsay Lohan's people would call the press, informing them where she was going to be so that she could then complain about how the press always followed her.

If She's not careful a Dog is going to mistake her for a bone one of these days and run off with her in it's mouth...strong to moderate breezes are also a high risk factor for this girl!

If I was to nail this chick the on-lookers (that's right, I'm not stingy with my sex life) would think my condom had suddenly sprouted bony limbs and bad hair.

Put a fuzzy orange wig on her and she'd be a ringer for Beaker.

"Mee mee mee mee!"

First of all, I can not TELL you how tired i was of reading all of those "she's so skinny she could get blown over by a breeze" jokes. how original. second, I hate looking at those pictures because they make me sick. I dont know how you can joke about this because eating disorders are very serious and 10% result in death. no one, no matter how much you hate them for their fame, deserves to suffer like that.

Her hair is looking especially nappy, isn't it? And unwashed. Oh wait - is that being redundant? And she looks like a complete retard with those fucking sunglasses. They're so big they don't even stay on her face anymore. I hate this cunt.

her hair looks super ridiculous.

@54
Are you kidding? "no one, no matter how much you hate them for their fame, deserves to suffer like that." Last time I checked, no one is starving Nicole but herself. She's CHOOSING to destroy her body. Starving yourself you can look thin has got to be one of the most selfish things someone can do. There are millions of men, women and children starving and dying around the world, who would love a chance to eat the food she scorns. If she wants to starve herself, that's her choice. I'll save my pity for those who really need it.

#54 is really Mary Kate Olson. Or wishes she could be...

Her cute friend in the polka-dots looks like a young Jennifer Connelly.

Good God, someone please feed this girl, she looks like a f*kking skeleton!!!

HA! She has you all fooled. Daddy Richie cut her off when she was a fat cow, so she's turned to a life of crime, and Beverly Hills is her oyster! She is actually now the perfect size to slip under doors, slide through mail chutes, and sneak in slightly cracked windows. So hide your jewelry and electronics people, but feel free to leave a table full of food out... that should be safe. You can eat dinner while you watch the wall and listen to each other chew. What a crafty, sly little thief!

WHAT A BIG FAT-ASS!!

#54 - Are you out of your fucking mind, you dumb whore? If you don't like the jokes or the photos why on God's green fucking earth would you even soil our beloved site with your lice-infested ass? Don't come in my house and shit in my living room, you pathetic piece of horse cock. I eat little whiney bitches like you for breakfast, and shit Hello Kitty crackers out at around 10:00 am (PST).

I am your worst nightmare, and I might have to double date with you, Cock-Ninja and his sister and show you both how to eat horse meat.

That skinny little psycho deserves every word of every taunt she gets on this site. if you don't want to be rail thin, then eat some fucking food. boohoo.

Fucking stupid wretch.

If she wants to hide all she has to do is turn sideways.
Eat a sandwich.
Eat a burger.
Her bag is bigger than her.
The wind will blow her away.
Those sunglasses make her look like a fly.
A reference to Ethiopia.

Now I'm funny like you guyyyyzzzz.

Who's the little boy dressed in his grandmothers clothing?

www.whatthesha.com

#41

Her biological father is the former drummer of the Commodores (black) and her mother was a backstage assistant (white). She spent most of season 2 and 3 of the Simple Life advertising that she was half & half.

*is* half & half. Present tense.

#64 - Shouldn't you be out purging, Nicole?

It's been widely reported that Nicole's dad is Pete Escovedo, (brother of 1980s pop percussionist Sheila E.) an Afro-Latino musician. Her biological mother was a backstage assistant for Lionel. She's also of Afro-Latin heritage and currently resides in the Dominican Republic.
Either way, her hair is still nappy!

#63....yeah dude!, you tell that dumbass afterbirth of a mongolion grudgefuck what the real deal is!!!!!
oh and as for #54, maybe you should just stick to cramming things INTO your mouth instead of forcing us to listen to the verbal diarrea that comes out of it. Nicole Raunchy put herself in that position, so why should she get any sympathy for something that she did solely to herself? Try thinking before speaking you stupid cow.

backstage assistant = groupie fucktoy

Or she'd show up in a toaster costume and try to plug herself in. And then when she gets blown against the wall she'll grab a keyboard and shove it down her pants and say "Haha! You'll never find me" and then ride away on her pet ostrich so she won't draw any attention to herself.

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