Sep 19 2006Mischa Barton is a dirty hippie
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I'm all for retro, but Mischa Barton's dress makes her look like a time traveler from the 70's. Only not nearly as cool as that sounds, because if it was there'd probably be a dinosaur in the background having a fist fight with Abraham Lincoln. And you'd put your money on the dinosaur, but old Abe has a mean uppercut.
More of Mischa looking like she's given up showering after the jump.
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Reader Comments
1. JammyDodger - September 19, 2006 1:30 PM
1st?
2. Wampoon.com - September 19, 2006 1:32 PM
Looks like my sofa cover.
http://www.wampoon.com
3. piratekuhnbeard - September 19, 2006 1:44 PM
and there probably wouldn't be a nice mercedes (?) chillin' there. yeah. that.
4. dstroyer - September 19, 2006 1:45 PM
Moonbeam Barton?
5. Rimmer - September 19, 2006 1:45 PM
Like that inmate yelling at Jodie Foster ... I Can Smell Your Pussy ...
6. frenchtoaststix - September 19, 2006 1:52 PM
It's Squeaky Fromme.
7. BigJim - September 19, 2006 1:53 PM
I betcha she's got a really hairy pussy. Like one of those chicks in a 70s porn film.
Yuck!
8. LilRach - September 19, 2006 1:56 PM
WTF. She looks like she's travelled back in time to the 60's.
And what is with her top in the 2nd to last picture - well what is with her whole outfit? She needs a shower pronto!
9. commissioner - September 19, 2006 1:58 PM
Yup, BigJim, she looks like a granola gal.
10. Grobpilot - September 19, 2006 1:59 PM
She kinds looks like my babysitter who let me feel her up when I was twelve years old. She wasn't incredibly attractive but, hey, my first grope! Ahh, the memories......
11. Grobpilot - September 19, 2006 2:00 PM
"kinda". Shit, I still spell like a twelve year old.
12. Russell_Reyes - September 19, 2006 2:05 PM
eww... what happened to her?
13. thesarahficial - September 19, 2006 2:06 PM
ew
14. RichPort - September 19, 2006 2:20 PM
Four words: Russian mail order bride.
15. clamofdeath - September 19, 2006 2:24 PM
not showering is the only way she'll put on weight
16. PJ in PA - September 19, 2006 2:27 PM
Nothing pairs better with BoHo (Ho for Homeless) chic than a classic Chanel purse and a Mercedes Benz.
17. tits_on_snack - September 19, 2006 2:28 PM
I can't exactly remember what prompted healthy, fit and bronzed, big-breasted, luscious lipped, toned and tight-bunned babes to be out; and haggard, frail old 75-pound senior citizens in flat shoes, giant old lady glasses, and cancer patient hollows under their eyes to become all the rage. But I think it starts with 'Ashley and Mary Kate' and ends with 'Olsen'.
18. reflight - September 19, 2006 2:32 PM
It's always nice to see celebs without all the makeup and glam clothes...
Well, maybe not.
19. reflight - September 19, 2006 2:36 PM
And Fish, could you get another home page ad besides Whitford making eyes at Hughley's nappy-ass hair?
20. Tracie - September 19, 2006 2:36 PM
What happened to her? Two words: Cisco Adler. I mean, how long could she possibly go on seeing him without his stank finallyt rubbing off on her? I can't believe I'm saying this, but Mischa, bring back Brandon Davis! He may be a sweaty pig, but at least he's a more fashionable sweaty pig.
21. Superevil - September 19, 2006 2:37 PM
WTF? Can someone explain to me why she is famous?
22. Tracie - September 19, 2006 2:37 PM
*finally ...Type too fast and mistakes happen...
23. krisdylee - September 19, 2006 2:43 PM
70's porn and hairy pussies make me giggle.
24. BarbadoSlim - September 19, 2006 2:44 PM
Yuck, my state of the art Logitech gaming keyboard suddenly started reeking of old-woman smell.
Somebody take this witch and burn her at the stake PLEASE!!
25. Tracy - September 19, 2006 2:44 PM
Maybe I could understand it if the outfit at least looked comfortable, but that drapey dress with the fussy sleeves and strings hanging off the back looks like a pain in the ass. I think a cute sweatsuit and a pair of keds would have given her more bang for her buck.
26. Tracy - September 19, 2006 2:47 PM
...or maybe now that she's unemployed she's taken a job as a wench at the Renaissance fair. "Fetch me some fries and a diet coke!"
27. Italian Stallion - September 19, 2006 2:58 PM
LOL @ 14........
*Ring Ring*
Janis Joplin called, she wants her shit back.......
28. Angry Ferret Jones - September 19, 2006 3:05 PM
Wait a good goddamn minute. That is the same Mischa Barton as this: http://pub.tv2.no/multimedia/na/archive/00233/Mischa_Barton_233048g.jpg ?????
What in holy hell happened? Did she get beat in the head with an ugly stick? Jumping Jesus on a pogo stick, what is one homely skank.
Would I hit? Sure, but I wouldn't tell any of you about it afterwards...
29. Star Maker Machinery - September 19, 2006 3:18 PM
Nice shawl haha ... is that blue thing a tunic? She's bringing the medieval look back.
30. Amy3000 - September 19, 2006 3:46 PM
I wonder if she forgoes shaving her legs and armpits too?...ick
31. CelebSlam.com - September 19, 2006 3:53 PM
I think she may have washed my car windows with newspaper.
http://www.celebslam.com
32. DiabetesExplosion - September 19, 2006 4:14 PM
Bitch's muff is NASTY.
33. krisdylee - September 19, 2006 4:27 PM
I'm gonna go out on a limb here folks, and suggest that most famous people are somehwat normal(and sometimes fugly) folk under their air-brushed, manicured, cosmetically-altered exteriors. I mean, I am so fucking hot as it is, I couldn't IMAGINE how fucking unbelievable I'd be if a little Hollywood magic was bestowed upon me.
The world would likely implode.
34. RichPort - September 19, 2006 4:44 PM
Since she was auditioning for the remake of one our first favorite jerk-off movies, Heidi, where the FUCK are the wooden clogs???
35. RichPort - September 19, 2006 4:46 PM
Did I say jerk-off movies...? Shit... um, I of course meant stupidhead poopy movies... I swear I didn't wack off when I was kid... not that much...
36. xx.deathcab.xx - September 19, 2006 4:47 PM
She's one mental breakdown away from making a sextape, releasing it at newstands, setting up a press conference explaining how she never intended to promote 'Oh In Ohio' with the homevideo and then she'll continue to plug the movies concept. All the more, I die a little inside.
37. Throws-Like-A-Girl - September 19, 2006 4:50 PM
How does the Superfish know how Abe Lincoln punches??
I'll bet* Mr Fish throws like a girl??
38. BarbadoSlim - September 19, 2006 4:51 PM
Wait a minute here, wasn't this smelly cunt over in London learning the fuck how to "act."
what the fuck was that all about?
39. camabron - September 19, 2006 5:22 PM
Well, that black Mercedes late model E Class is no hippie car I tell you what.
40. hav-a-tampa - September 19, 2006 6:06 PM
First ! ya man ya. woooooooo...
41. Skönflicka - September 19, 2006 6:19 PM
Victoria Beckham, Kate Moss and Mischa Barton : what's up with the Brits ?
42. DiabetesExplosion - September 19, 2006 6:53 PM
Didn't you hear? England had to export some skanks since they imported Madonna to gain a surplus in the balance of trade and prevent a trade deficit in cunts.
43. suzy - September 19, 2006 6:59 PM
you think she slept in mary kate's closet?
44. PrincessMuMu - September 19, 2006 7:23 PM
Are you retarded? What the hell do you THINK celebrities look like when they're not on the red carpet?
45. Reid - September 19, 2006 7:58 PM
She looks like a Golden Girl's stunt double.
http://www.reidaboutit.com
46. assfacecocknocker - September 19, 2006 10:31 PM
that dress is fucking terrible. it makes her look like she smells like pee-pee. i should know, im a professional pee-pee sniffer.
47. stonefoxhippie - September 19, 2006 11:10 PM
what is she hiding under that tent?
48. Niara - September 20, 2006 2:47 AM
I think she's a bad lay.
49. jrzmommy - September 20, 2006 4:51 AM
She looks like Gwenyth Paltrow and Mary Kate Olsen had a baby that breaks into cars. Damn girl, there ain't no more Dead shows...get your ass in the shower!
Old Abe may have a mean uppercut, but he can't take a head shot to save his ass.
50. Doodlebug - September 20, 2006 5:05 AM
Um...I still think she looks fine actually. But yeah, I'm sure everyone commenting looks a hell of a lot hotter than Ms. Barton..bunch of fat losers shoving chips into their mouths by the glow of the computer screen as they hate on successful, hardworking and rich young women.
51. knowhere - September 20, 2006 5:26 AM
showering is for elitists anyway
52. jrzmommy - September 20, 2006 5:33 AM
50--I do look a lot hotter than this skank in the pretty Tahari suit I'm wearing to work today. And I am successful, hardworking and rich, not to mention healthy, educated and happy!! Young? Well, I'm not 25 but I'm not old either. Doesn't that just piss you off? Have a great day.
53. BigJim - September 20, 2006 5:52 AM
I'm the hottest guy here:
http://profiles.yahoo.com/therealbigjim68
54. Italian Stallion - September 20, 2006 6:12 AM
LOL at BigJim. You better hope your wife doesn't see that. You might not be able to come back to the fish again. I bet when she cracks that whip, shit hurts..............
55. pinky_nip - September 20, 2006 6:17 AM
Welcome back BigJim... allow me roll out the pink carpet for you.
56. BigJim - September 20, 2006 6:40 AM
I'm not afraid of my wife... I learned how to clear the history on my computer.
57. fat ugly girl with frizzy curly hair - September 20, 2006 6:52 AM
that's the way i look.. but i'm in NY- it's the air
58. commissioner - September 20, 2006 7:33 AM
She looks like one of those Pentecostal women who ring doorbells in my neighborhood trying to "convert" all of us sinners. All she needs is a couple of grubby-looking toddlers to complete the picture.
59. jrzmommy - September 20, 2006 7:42 AM
It's the Daryll Hannah phenomenon. Pretty girl, but does everything in her power to look ugly as sin when she goes out. Is this House of Ruth chic?
60. UNWASHEDMASSES - September 20, 2006 8:43 AM
You know her pussy hair's braided. And the long skirt because she doesn't shave her legs in the Fall. Watch her and Cisco let slip a sex tape that no one's interested in. Wouldn't that be funny? A star's popularity measured by the downloads - or lack thereof - of their naked shenanigans. Those two release a nasty home vid that no one even bothers to peek at, that US troops use to "violate" the Geneva Conventions and torture terrorist prisoners with. And any takers on the fact that she has a hairy butthole?
61. HolisticWisdomcom - September 20, 2006 8:43 AM
@7
Linda Love Lace from Deep Throat was better dressed-
http://www.holisticwisdom.com/deep-throat-original.htm
62. jrzmommy - September 20, 2006 8:45 AM
the thought of her and one of that guy from the world's ugliest band doing it is mental abuse.
63. Doodlebug - September 20, 2006 10:14 AM
Dear #52 - lmao. WOW. So you ARE over 25, and you DO still read this pre-teen celebrity gossip shit? That's even hotter! *LOVES IT* You try to have a good day too!
64. HollyJ - September 20, 2006 10:27 AM
She's picked up her grooming techniques from that Yeti boyfriend of hers.
65. jrzmommy - September 20, 2006 10:40 AM
63--what's your point, assclown? do you have one? run along and play hide-and-go-fuck-yourself with the other kids at recess now, junior.
66. brooklynite8215 - September 20, 2006 12:16 PM
@50 You ass, the whole point of coming here is to make fun of celebrities... hence SUPERFICIAL... but I guess your junior high special ed class is still on words like Cat and Dog so you're forgiven your ignorance
67. ValeWolf - September 20, 2006 12:51 PM
I love it when fans come and defend their Gods. It's just pricelss how perfect they see them.
68. commissioner - September 20, 2006 12:59 PM
Hari Krishna, Hari Krishna . . . . .
69. Skönflicka - September 20, 2006 2:54 PM
@42 - Excellent !!
70. Niara - September 21, 2006 2:59 AM
@50: I may not be as rich as Mrs Barton, but I do speak 9 languages, earn good cash and live a simple, happy life. I don't hate any celebrity, I don't even envy them. Quite on the contrary. Such lives must suck, because what's so fun of being able to buy everything you want? There's no surprise, no anticipation anymore, after a while...not for me, thanks :-)
71. Niara - September 21, 2006 3:02 AM
@67: This kind of celeb adoration does not exist so strongly here in Europe. I noticed that in US, it's incredible how some people even want to LOOK like their favourite celebrities, and behave like them, even do plastic surgery (in extremis).
As for Barton, I saw her act, and I don't think she's that good. I've seen better.
72. RichPort - September 21, 2006 4:33 AM
#63 - While you sit at home, trying to dislodge the sweaty linty sludge trapped in your flesh folds, please remember that Mischa "the farmer's daughter" Barton and the entire cast of OC would like for nothing more than for you to drink a huge steaming cup of shut the fuck up.
#71 - You Eurodweebs are too busy worshipping interbred 'royalty' and placating Muslim extremists to worry about the inane things in life. That's why we love America.
73. jrzmommy - September 21, 2006 5:06 AM
72-sweet. Europe is totally into celebrity watching. Give me a fucking break. Ever watch Italian television? Besides being a fucking 3-ring circus on crank, it's all plasta-people. The UK -- hello? their tabloids are worse than America's. I don't know or care too much about fucking France so they can all drop dead anyhow. WHY do Eurotrash always compare themselves to America? We're different cultures.....get over it. fucking assholes.
74. Creepmouse - September 21, 2006 10:34 AM
Helen of Troy: The face that launched a thousand ships.
Mischa Barton: The outfit that launched a couple dozen petty intercontinental comment flames.
75. tsarinaamanda - September 21, 2006 12:59 PM
I have NEVER seen this dizzy cunt in ANYTHING that even looks slightly attractive. She always looks like she's wearing something from the Salvation Army, but I'd be willing to bet those grotesque outfits of hers cost a LOT of money. She was one of the first to start wearing those goddamn "skinny jeans" as well, so that right there says a whole hell of a lot about her so-called "style". Besides, for a fairly emaciated chick, she's got one of the ugliest bodies I've ever seen. She's so thin, but she looks flabby, she's got no tits, and has huge, wide hips and some of the UGLIEST legs I've ever seen. They're flabby AND skinny at the same time, it's so strange. And don't even get me started on that face...goddamn, she's HIDEOUS! How she ever got into Hollywood is a mystery to me, and how she's now this "big star" after being (not even STARRING) in ONE shit TV show is yet another mystery to me as well.
76. tsarinaamanda - September 21, 2006 1:05 PM
Oh, @50? STFU already. This stupid twat doesn't even know you exist, so defending her isn't getting you anywhere. She's not going to call you up on the phone, thank you for defending her "honor", and invite you to Hollywood to be her new BFF, so give it a fucking rest, ok? Take that celeb-worship somewhere else, this is the SUPERFICIAL, we come here to talk shit about celebs, not talk about how WONDERFUL they are while playing with ourselves. And if you wanted to worship a celeb, you could do a HELL of a lot better than Mischa freakin Barton! She's definitely nothing to get all wet over, that's for sure.
77. Michele - September 23, 2006 4:32 PM
Even if she's dirty, Mischa died with her former tv role MARISSA.
She sucks!
78. HollywoodSnark - April 11, 2007 12:19 PM
ha ha...well, she doesn't have a job now