August 22, 2006

Paris Hilton is cunning

paris_hilton_friends.jpg

"I'll pick out two outfits, one which is disgusting and one nice and I'll ask my 'friend' what they think. If they go for the revolting one, I cut them out of my life."
Pairs Hilton on how she weeds out her friends


Previous Entries

» Madonna has some magic water
» Paris Hilton is the best singer ever
» Kevin Federline rocks the Teen Choice Awards
» Our email is was broken
» Hulk Hogan and his neon banana hammock

Comments

first, and man that is cruel

This post is confusing. Me no likey. :(

"And then I put that revolting outfit on and get photographed as many times as possible."

Paris deserves her name. Because, much like the French she is stinky (hello crusty armpits), she has bad fashion sense (zebra dress and alien blue sweatsuit), and she just plain sucks.

lol @ #3

What a skank.

now we know what Nicole did.

I don't know if that's a good way to test friendship. People have different taste.

The title should say Paris Hilton is cunting.

That's exactly how I choose my friends.
Only instead of picking out different outfits that either look good or look bad and making them choose which looks better on me and basing their worth on the chicness of their decision, we have conversations and hang out together. Other than that though it's exactly the same.

Paris Hilton, the human equivalent to the kiddie pool...shallow, full of shit and loaded with nasty bacteria.

I would take two pairs of my giant dirty soiled underwear, and have Paris snort deeply from the crotch of each. "Which pair did I fart in the most, Paris?" If she can't tell that I pushed out a turtle into both pairs, then I will not go out with her.

And suddenly her comment about Nicole Richie and why they're not friends anymore, "She knows what she did", makes SO much more sense.

Pairs Hilton? Come one! Typos typos!!

Isnt she great guys?? Wow. what a nice, respectable young lady...trying to keep a good respectable reputation. Sweet girl. I mean, it is all about the outfit, not about meaningful lifetime relationships.
Those are for poor people.

@2 I'm confused too. So the outfits she wears are the ones she thinks are the good ones? What the hell do the awful ones look like?? Methinks this system isn't working so well for Ms. Paris.

'I ask a guy which he would rather have, herpes or syphillis, and if he picks the herpdog, well then he's a keeper...'

i'd still fuck her sister

What if they make fun of her herpes?

http://www.celebslam.com

Kiddie Pool, Good One #10!!

Useless whore.

.....wow

Admit it. She is brilliant. Truly, a modern day Solomon.

OK..honestly, i thought she had at least a LITTLE sensibility, being that she makes all that money and invests in all these different aspects of the media, but seriously, could she BE any more of an asshole?
the things she says makes me wanna beat the shit out of her...she needs to keep an everlasting cock in her mouth to keep her from saying stupid idiotic shit like this!

#9--funny!

Yikes. How can one's sense of reality become so distorted...I mean, it's got to be a joke. I think.

What if mommy and daddy pick the revolting outfit?

http://www.BadBreakups.net

Her closet must have a bunch of those faceless heads with different wigs on them, looking eerily like a cannibal chief's hut or Lord of the Flies. Hopefully we'll find her head on a stick someday.

Could it be this is the way we should all start picking our friends? Turn her upside down and it won't matter what the hell she wears.

Beauty on the outside does not necessarily translate to it on the outside. Paris is one of the biggest examples of that in our society.

http://www.holisticwisdom.com/paris-hilton-sex-tape.htm

I'm sorry...

Nicole

This is from her book back in 04, and right after that line she says 'unless they have really bad taste" duh old news

I wish I had friends.

I pick my friends by the size of their vibrators.

Wow, being in second grade is SO tough!

I wonder what happens when they think her FACE is revolting!

http://www.spoonspam.com

I guess everyone picked the wrong outfit.

I think the friends she keeps are even more cunning: they pick out an outfit that she likes, she wears it, and still looks like trash. Bravo!

#12 - I'm confused...isn't "She knows what she did" the same thing that Tom said about Nicole Kidman? Do you think Nicole told him it was ok to go out wearing flat shoes or something?

Ewwwww...I thought the title said "Cumming", and I actually threw up in my mouth a lil.

Paris is her own best friend, she should ask herself to choose an outfit and if she chooses the wrong one than she can endlessly kick herself for having bad taste.

I bet she's one of those people who make fun of people who drive Hondas and Fords. You know, us little people.

I only have friends who aren't as pretty as I am. Just in case.

It must be exhausting to be Paris Hilton.

Paris to friend: "Do I go with 'skank-ho' or 'skankier-ho'?"
Friend: "Ummmm...."
Paris: "Come on. Which one says 'I am a physical manifestation of the herpes virus?'"
Friend: "Well, I..."
Paris: "I can't HEAR YOU. Would you wear 'Nip-slip neckline' or 'You'd have to lift only an inch of this skirt to lick my butt, Owen Wilson,'?"
Friend: "I think I have to go."
Paris: "Whatever, bitch."
[End of scene]

It's like that saying, you never know how truly dumb someone is until they open their mouth. So true!

I guess it's time to cut herself out of her life, because those wide belts have got-to-go. Or maybe she'll just cut herself.

So is this taking place at a store or does she already own these outfits?

46 she already owns them. That's how rich she is. She can buy stuff she knows is ugly and not care.

These days the kinkajou gets to decide what she wears.

paris hilton is a no good piece of shit whore...the only fame she earned was from being a whore. more whore behavior at Dirty Rotten Whore

Vapid, thy name is Paris Hilton. It must be nice to be able to cut people off so easily. I've got a friend since high school and ever since he ate all my Little Debbie snack cakes I've been trying to cut him off for years but to no avail. She's trying to come off cool, and instead achieves cold hearted. What she doesn't realize is those "friends" she terminates were never really friends at all. They were only with her for the parties, the lifestyle, and the free drugs/sex. I'm sure when these ex-friends pine about losing Paris, about picking the wrong fucking frock, they do so because they miss her sweet laughter, her rapier wit, and her loving generosity. Right.

@28, did you mean "beauty on the outside does not...translate to beauty on the inside?" If so, do you seriously think she's beautiful on the outside?!?! YUCK! If you take a close look at her face instead of the hideous outfits she wears you'll see that she really doesn't have outer beauty either - she's got lots of money and lots of makeup & so-called fashion, but it's all to distract you from the fact that she's not all that pretty. And that's even after plastic surgery.

I think that if she left herself as she was without plastic surgery and simply used some makeup (instead of all her makeup at once) and stopped wearing such hideous outfits & stopped flashing her hooha at everyone that passes by, she might not be all that nauseating...

Yea, cuz only Paris has good taste. I mean, who doesn't want to look like a rich slut. I know I do.

See, now I always used "The Princess Bride" as my litmus test for potential friends. If they like it and can quote extensively from it, they're in. If not . . .

Well, I'll let the bodies buried in my basement speak for themselves.

"I'll pick out two outfits, one which is disgusting and one nice and I'll ask my 'friend' what they think. If they go for the revolting one, I have Nikki wear it"

@53 - That's INCONCEIVABLE!

SHE IS SUCH A PIG. SHE'S NASTY LOOKING AND SHE'S VENDICTIVE. THE TIME WILL COME WHEN SHE WILL DESERVE EVERYTHING SHE GETS.

SHE CAN'T SING HER WAY OUT OF A PAPERBAG. I HAVE NEWS FOR YOU.

@53
Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

what a dumb cunt. at least now EVERYONE knows how to get on her shit list, this definitely saves a lot of time and effort

Hey, #53--Have fun storming the castle!

As you wish.

I wonder how many friends with better fashion sense she's cut off already.

comon all ya post are good but get some more juicy merchandice

I like Nicole a lot more after hearing that.

At least she tried.

Paris, I apologize for #51. Please keep flashing your hooha. You are responsible for over half of my advertising.
Love,
The Superficial

Nobody likes her anyway, except for the firecrotch nerd.

#57 Stop saying that!

@ 53

She doesn't get eaten by the eels at this time.
I'm explaining to to because you look nervous.

I wasn't nervous. Maybe I was a little "concerned" but that's not the same thing.

My buddy Jared fucked Paris last Halloween and he said she is great in bed.

And her snatch tastes like a peach!

never seen the princess bride so y'all need to "stop saying that" quotes from the movie.

Mawidge...mawidge is what bwings us togewer today...Mawidge, the bwessed awwangement, that dweam wiffim a dweam...

and my personal favorite:

Now, a clever man would put the poison into his own goblet, because he would know that only a great fool would reach for what he was given. I'm not a great fool, so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of you. But you must have known I was not a great fool; you would have counted on it, so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of me.

She is more shallow AND idiotic than I could have ever imagined. Please don't buy her cd and make her richer. Everyone should pray that her sorry ass goes bankrupt.

@ 69

You do not happen to have six fingers on your right hand?

Paris Hilton is Cunting not Cunning.

this chick has made so many enemies one of them is bound to be a crazy motherfucker. Just crazy enough to rip her head off, shit down her throat & bury her in one of Bea Arthur's mumu's.

And they all quote out of fear . . .

Except #69. Note to self: Make room in basement.

@ 66 "As you wish!"

I used to work for a construction company and I noticed that the superintendents used to drive Big Jumbo Sized Heavy Duty Pickup Trucks, but they never really used the payload section of the truck. I asked one of the superintendents, "Why do you need such a big truck?" He thought about it for a moment and then answered very honestly, "Yes, I do need my heavy duty pickup truck, but not for doing work. I need it to command the respect of all the workers. The size of the truck commands respect and so does the loud diesel engine. The load roar of the diesel engine makes me feel like I'm doing something professional even if I'm just hauling an empty trash can from one worksite to the other. I could certainly do everything I do with a mini-truck or even an economy car with fold down rear seats and a hatchback."

78- scienceguy
What the FUCK does that have to do with Paris Hilton and her relevance to society or even science for that matter?

@79, it is tangentially related to Paris because she loves guys who drive big trucks like Matt Leinart. This brings to mind a question I recently received. Tell me if it has anything to do with science or Paris Hilton:


I am the proud owner of a 2001 FORD F-250, SUPER DUTY, 4WD, 4 DOOR, LARRIAT EDITION, PICKUP TRUCK.
My question is how slow do I need to drive in order to match the gas mileage of a TOYOTA COROLLA driving at say 55 miles per hour?

Oh and I was also wondering if it's worth it to remove the tail gate.
I heard that removing the tail gate creates a "wind tunnel" effect that will trickle down to my fuel economy.
If this is true, how much will it improve my gas mileage?

I have to admit that I never watch your show, but don't take it personal.
I just don't have an interest in science or history.

Thanks,

George from Texas

Ps: Here's a shot of me behind the wheel of my 2001 FORD F-250 SUPER DUTY
http://www.manbottle.com/pictures/bushtruck1.jpg...

where's bigjim

#68 - did your friend notice that the guys who organized that gangbang brought a case of peach-flavored condoms?

I'd still tap that, despite the Jewish nose. (no Mel Gibson)

now, i've finally discovered who is that headless blond bitch on the top of the page.

#6 & #32...ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Sorry I fed number 78

Yeah that's smart what if your friends have different taste cause damn if Paris' outfits aren't fugly

http://www.exposay.com/paris-hilton-paris-hilton-seen-around-town-promoting-her-new-cd-paris/p/3758/4/

I hope you're proud of yourself, Superficial. You're actually making me like Paris Hilton. I mean, who else could be this inadvertantly hilarious?

You guys are giving Paris way too much credit if you really think she said that. First of all, "cunning" is to Paris Hilton as "sober" is to Pete Doherty. Second of all, you really think she knows what "revolting" means?

@57 - JANE!!!! Where the hell have you been, woman?! Get my e-mail addy from Tranny..I need those pics again for the t-shirts...daaahling, please!

I can't believe so many people love the Princess Bride..awesome flick!

Have fun storming the castle!!!!!!

Paris Hilton: So, I say to the crabs on my twat, I've got these two combs, see? One is made of diamonds and the other one is made of steel. And I tell them I'll let them decide which comb I use to scrape my chooch! They ALWAYS pick diamonds. That's why crabs are hot.

When I found you, you were so slobbering drunk you couldn't buy brandy. And you: friendless, brainless, helpless, hopeless. Do you want me to send you back to where you were, unemployed . . . in Greenland?

had to. sorry.

Where is the enraged mob with a guillotine when you need one?

oh paris you are just so fucking sneaky lol

oh paris you are just so friggin sneaky lol

I had a best friend for 16 years, then the sex tape came out and Parish was everywhere. My best friend looks just like Paris. I found a new friend.

Yeah, she is quite the cunning little runt.

BIOTCH!

I think the Princess Bride might be the most quotable movie EVER.

Zanna, I'll get your email from Tranny when I get a chance. Right now I have to go get ready to go see Toad the Wet Sprocket with my husband...I know, I know, it's part of his birthday present. What can I say, I married a nerd.

I can't even believe you just openly admitted to going to a Toad the Wet Sprocket concert in a public forum as vile as this one??? What the christ are you thinking? I'm gonna leave that one alone.


Oh & I have to throw in that Caddyshack is the most quotable movie in the history of cinema, but P Bride is definitely a close second! i said pee bride...

That's amazing, 'cause I've been playing Paris' song for my friends, and if they say they like it, I cut them out of my life.

I thought it was a great plan...

And when I first saw the heading, I thought it said, "Paris Hilton is cumming."

In a similar ruse, I actually covered a mongoos's cock in roof-tar, an AMC Gremlins only working piston in lime jello and mayonaise, then a switch blade in baby vomit and holy water....guess which object Paris stuffed in her cunt?

Yup, all at the same time.

Then she burped.

Biatcho, I am with you. fuck Toad. and for the love of all that is fuckable...the Princess bride as a quote option.....go fuck yourselves, cause no one else ever has. Stupid assholes.

Does anyone want a peanut?

Or whatever that dead freak of nature said.

Jay and Silent Bob movies are the most quotable.

Cheeks, I don't want to hear shit about friggin Spinal Tap.

Ok, I am done, rant away, people.

Did anyone get that?

#103 I agree. Jay and Silent Bob are way more quotable. Of course I've never seen the Princess Bride, I just like smoking weed and weed references. Now excuse me while I put on some Marley and fire up the ol' Kabbalah bong...

LMAO #6 you got it! Apparently Paris spends $200 000+ a year just on her blue contact lenses, her eyes are actually brown. I prefer brown over blue so she's wasting her money. How fucking wierd would it be to look at yourself with different coloured eyes, that's just trippy, there is something very very wrong with people that feel the need to change their eye colour. But Paris does it so it's cool!!!!!

105 Rich P

dude, the Kabbalabong? Every German knows that smoking Jews gets you SOOOOO high. Nice action, front clasp Bra!!!!!

Is it just me or is she starting to foam at the mouth in that pic?

dirty slag. it's fun hating her though i admit

that's how you find a true friend, you have to have the same fashion taste of course

that's how you find a true friend, you have to have the same fashion taste of course

that's how you find a true friend, of course you have to have the same fashion taste

I think the actual quote was, "if they tell me I should wear underwear, I cut them out of my life."

Of course, the Guinness Book just voted her "Most Overrated Celebrity." If we could just figure out HOW she became a celebrity, maybe we could move on to finding a cure for cancer. Not herpes -- she's incubated that into a super-gene by now.

Pardon me while I go give my brain a good scrubbing.

#107 - Damn Tranny, that's cold.

Jay: Yo man, tell me something about me.
Rufus: You masturbate more than anyone on the planet.
Jay: Aw fuck, everyone knows that. Tell me something nobody knows.
Rufus: When you do it, you're thinking about guys.
[a shocked Silent Bob stares at Jay]
Jay: Dude, not all the time.

100, 99, I find Scarface and The Life of Brian to be highly quotable. Although I must agree with 100--I've used "I've got a pool and a pond....the pond would be good for you." on more than one occassion.

do they at least get to keep the revolting dress?
#43..you're the funniest thing ever.

thats totally a catch 22, how is someone like her evern going to have a disgusting outfit?

It couldn't be that all her female friends are cut out of her life cuz she f*cks their men, could it? I didn't think it was possible to hate the petri dish any more than I already do, but it happened.

Elaborate... Ya daft assed newsmong :)

jay calls her...
boo-boo-kitty-fuck.

@10
mommy-
you win. hands down!

plus you owe me a new keyboard.

31
mommy, i'll be your friend. as long as you keep that scary stoopid black person off my cute fluffy ass!

okay, so today's tally
most quotable movies:
princess bride
caddyshack
life of brian (o.k. anything python)
JAY AND SILENT BOB (i would SO do silent bob)

and can i throw in... JAWS ?

"we're going to need a bigger boat"

hee-hee-hee!

suicidal: call home. the kids need cereal (kidding) (seriously, i'm out of booze........)

She really needs to shut the fuck up and go away. Each sentence that falls from her lips just reminds the public what a complete 'tard she is. And please...don't get me started on her 'singing' career. The whack song she's got out is a testament to the limits of the vocal enhancements that can be done in a recording studio. Fuck, I've heard screeching cats who were more melodious.

Bunny--what scary stoopid black person? DanYELL?

That's funny, I do the same thing with girls, I have sex with a hot one and an ugly one and after I hook up with the ugly one, I was drunk.

Why hate Paris? Sure, she parks in handi spots, but she's a celebrity and they all do crappy things sometimes because they're ALL overprivileged. Other than that, what gives? She's funny, cute, daring and definitely not stupid. All this stuff about calling her names (like "cunt," "whore," etc.) is immature and baseless. She's a whore any more other famous women who do as/who they please how?? Oh, right. Her ex publicised a sex tape. Slut!

I USED TO LIKE PARIS, BUT AFTER THAT VIDEO WITH THAT GUY CALLING LINDSAY A FIRECROTCH AND HER SNICKERING BEHIND HIM MADE ME REALLY DISLIKE HER....

KHARMA IS A BITCH, AND IT'S COMING FOR HER.

You guys don't get it. She cuts them off for chosing the ugly outfit because they WANT TO MAKE HER LOOK BAD.

I'd hit it.

She has to preserve her image-definately, but geez. You have to uphold a sense a morals (even if you never had them to begin with) to some extent.

This comment is not for Paris Hilton. This comment is for those of you that are leaving negative remarks. My advice to you...is...Be a REAL human by having respect and HAVE some justified morals. Ya'll feel me? Yaddaddamean?! WHY DO YOU GUYS CARE ANYWAY? JUST beacuse you guys DON'T have lives...it doesn't mean that it gives you the right to get on hers. REMEMBER! She's rich enough run you over with a hummer! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! You guys are so pathetic! I honestly love Paris even though she's done some crazy ass actions! I don't give a fcuk! Only because SHE doesn't give a sh*t herself. She's only living her life. SO ALL of you who give no respect. GO BRAINSTORM for the good things in life which will help all of you guys' pathetic lives and you may never know...you might attain the knowledge of RESPECT and justified morals along the way. HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH! And I can't believe you guys went through ALL the trouble to REGISTER for this site JUST SO you guys can VENT OUT your JEALOUSY by leaving her pathetic little rude comments. MUAHAHAHAHHAHAHHA! ANYWAYS! I LOVE YOU PARIS! C(:

This comment is not for Paris Hilton. This comment is for those of you that are leaving negative remarks. My advice to you...is...Be a REAL human by having respect and HAVE some justified morals. Ya'll feel me? Yaddaddamean?! WHY DO YOU GUYS CARE ANYWAY? JUST beacuse you guys DON'T have lives...it doesn't mean that it gives you the right to get on hers. REMEMBER! She's rich enough run you over with a hummer! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! You guys are so pathetic! I honestly love Paris even though she's done some crazy ass actions! I don't give a fcuk! Only because SHE doesn't give a sh*t herself. She's only living her life. SO ALL of you who give no respect. GO BRAINSTORM for the good things in life which will help all of you guys' pathetic lives and you may never know...you might attain the knowledge of RESPECT and justified morals along the way. HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH! And I can't believe you guys went through ALL the trouble to REGISTER for this site JUST SO you guys can VENT OUT your JEALOUSY by leaving her pathetic little rude comments. MUAHAHAHAHHAHAHHA! ANYWAYS! I LOVE YOU PARIS! C(:

This comment is not for Paris Hilton. This comment is for those of you that are leaving negative remarks. My advice to you...is...Be a REAL human by having respect and HAVE some justified morals. Ya'll feel me? Yaddaddamean?! WHY DO YOU GUYS CARE ANYWAY? JUST beacuse you guys DON'T have lives...it doesn't mean that it gives you the right to get on hers. REMEMBER! She's rich enough run you over with a hummer! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! You guys are so pathetic! I honestly love Paris even though she's done some crazy ass actions! I don't give a fcuk! Only because SHE doesn't give a sh*t herself. She's only living her life. SO ALL of you who give no respect. GO BRAINSTORM for the good things in life which will help all of you guys' pathetic lives and you may never know...you might attain the knowledge of RESPECT and justified morals along the way. HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH! And I can't believe you guys went through ALL the trouble to REGISTER for this site JUST SO you guys can VENT OUT your JEALOUSY by leaving her pathetic little rude comments. MUAHAHAHAHHAHAHHA! ANYWAYS! I LOVE YOU PARIS! C(:

This comment is not for Paris Hilton. This comment is for those of you that are leaving negative remarks. My advice to you...is...Be a REAL human by having respect and HAVE some justified morals. Ya'll feel me? Yaddaddamean?! WHY DO YOU GUYS CARE ANYWAY? JUST beacuse you guys DON'T have lives...it doesn't mean that it gives you the right to get on hers. REMEMBER! She's rich enough run you over with a hummer! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! You guys are so pathetic! I honestly love Paris even though she's done some crazy ass actions! I don't give a fcuk! Only because SHE doesn't give a sh*t herself. She's only living her life. SO ALL of you who give no respect. GO BRAINSTORM for the good things in life which will help all of you guys' pathetic lives and you may never know...you might attain the knowledge of RESPECT and justified morals along the way. HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH! And I can't believe you guys went through ALL the trouble to REGISTER for this site JUST SO you guys can VENT OUT your JEALOUSY by leaving her pathetic little rude comments. MUAHAHAHAHHAHAHHA! ANYWAYS! I LOVE YOU PARIS! C(:

I LOVE PARIS! :)

I love Paris! (:

I love Paris!

Post a comment

Comments will be moderated and obnoxious or promotional comments may be removed.