Aug 23 2006Britney Spears yells at Jessica Simpson

she can yell?

she's pregnant? i thought that was a beer gut? apparently jessica is willing to kiss anything that isn't Nick.

I bet Britney's belly tastes like dead dreams.

I hate them both, but Jessica should've given that fat hillbilly a beatdown for yelling at her. At least Jessica was married to Nick Lachey and not that parasite douchebag K-Fed. TEAM JESSICA! (Just this once...)

That's just fucking creepy. Who in their right fucking mind, asks someone they BARELY know (or even if they do know them for that matter) to kiss their pregnant belly? At least Brit had the sense enough to say NO, which is all we can hope for at this point.

For a preggo barefoot redneck, she shore has a purty smile!

The intelligence level of those two combine equate that of a dry cactus....anyways good thing jessica didnt kiss that stomach....britney spears is so dirty that she has to creep up on bathwater....if you want to check out more whore behavior.... http://www.dirtyrottenwhore.com

The visualization alone of that entire exchange between those two nitwits just made me lose 5 IQ points.

Kiss her belly? I wouldn't touch that thing with a long stick... because if I did, the stick would set on fire and start crying. Yea, sticks aren't animated and don't cry... but this one would.

I think Britney Spears has three responses to questions, "I'm Country" "Hell no" or just farting... Jessica Simpson got the second one.

They should get those two and Paris on Celebrity Jepardy. Then play it at night for insomniacs and people with sleeping disorders.
(" Ummm....yeahh...Could you repeat the question ?")

i would pay at least $2.50 to motorboat brit's sweet sweet sugar tits. maybe even $3

http://www.funderpants.com

Excuse me, person I am not friends with, may I put my scary toothy bum-chin mouth on your body? That's just weird. I would have said 'Hell No' too.

haha funny...

She probably thought she would catch Jessica's herpes...wait, nevermind, that's Paris Hilton

http://www.celebslam.com

This is the smartest thing this bitch has said in years (meaning Britney). Who goes around kissing people's bellies? How disgusting. That is the equivalent of kissing a hooker. Gross!

The Teen Choice awards: Where brain cells go to die.

When I was preggers, all sorts of weirdos wanted to rub my belly, and THAT drove me up the fucking wall. Good on yah, Brit. That request of Jessica's was waaaay too bizarre. I would have punched her though. Right in the twat.

as a consolation, K-Fed offered to let Jessica kiss his ball-sac, saying that it's where the NEXT baby would come from...sadly, things got a little 'involved' and she swallowed baby #3...

What an ass... She should have let Jessica kiss her belly!!!

I would have...

So that's what the Goodyear blimp would look like in cocktail dress . . .

TCLTC

I think someone made this up.

I think jessica wanted to get closer to Brit's meatloaf and take a long hard wiff.

I mean, why would anyone want to kiss a pregnant bellly? One person ends up with smeared lipstick and the other ends up with said lipstick on their dress. That's just dumb!!!

Mmm..Jessica ALMOST going down on Britney makes me feel funny in my pants.

Jessica was hurt because she didn't understand. Awhile back, when she and Britney were intoxicated, Britney had asked to kiss her "belly" and when Jess let her Britney went further south and tongue-twiddled Jess' pleasure button. Jess was just trying to return the favor, but Brit - good mother that she is - didn't want to deprived her fetus from it's dippy.

I wouldn't want my face anywhere near the lower hemisphere of that planet. Jessica must be on crack.

I wouldn't even want to kiss Spears' belly. She could have said yes, and when Jessica bent over to kiss her belly, the fucking redneck could have grabbed her head turned around and farted in her face. Now that's celebrity news.........

They didn't finish the report:

After Brit said 'Hell no', Jess was heard saying - "I'm the best belly-kisser ever, my daddy says so."

Of course, Jess isn't smart enough to differentiate between Papa Joe's belly & his cock, but she was just trying to be nice.

She probably said hell no because it would have required lifting her dress over her outrageously huge belly, exposing the fact that she was no wearing underwear since there hasn't been a pair made that could contain her blown-out cooch.

It's weird for someone to ask to kiss a pregnant woman's belly.

Kissing Britney's belly? How about punching Brit's belly. Hard. Over and over. Do the world a favour.

Oh my. Mentioning Britney and Jessica in the same sentence is one thing, but witnessing candid interaction between the two is another. When I picture them talking, I picture two buckets of blonde hair mindlessly sitting there while smacking their gum. It's like who's the bigger moron - Britney or Jessica? Then there's K. Fed - don't even get me started on that.

#3 and #9 LOL!!!!

Jessica made up for it when she kissed K-Fedup after his JOKE of a performance. People say it "didn't suck" but it soooo did! Didn't he say people were going to be blown away by his performance? Blown away by a cheesy fake pianist shot in the beginning and a dancer that almost clocked him mid performance while some black dude shout out every third word with K-fuckhead? Whew, I'm soooo blown away!

#32 - Ah, that takes me back to the days of the Punching Gweneth in the Pregnant Belly thread. Those were the days 'round here...

Why would Jess want to do that? Probably smells like soured milk and looks like cottage cheese down there.

Jess: Can I kiss your tummy?
Brit: HUH?! My jaw hurts.
Jess: So can I?
Brit: *table slap* HUH?!
Jess: Is there a baby in there?
Brit: Do you believe in time travel?
Jess: The kitty-cat goes moo!
Brit: Hell no! You just want to look at the pee-hole! You're doing somethin' weird!

Those two should have a titty fight. I'm not even sure what that could possibly mean, but I'm sure it would fun to see.

#3 - I think I shed a tear...

I am torn between being discusted and turned on. I think turned on is winning...I would like to have a pic of Jessica kissing her belly. But then again, I wish I had a picture of Jessica Alba eating horse shit - so maybe I'm not normal.

make that disgusted

If I could get pregnant I'd be lying on my back by the side of the road right now waiting for the first swinging dick to empty his load and make it so, just so that Jessica Simpson would pucker her beautiful red lips and kiss my swollen belly. Then I'd grab her hair and knot it round my fist...oh dear, it's been a long day.

Um....that's not a flattering outfit.

#35, yeah those were the days. Funny thing is I still want to punch Paltrow, pregnant or not.

#16, you are SPOT ON. I was thinking the same thing. (That it was the smartest thing she'd said in years!) Of course, she should have said "Hell, yes!" about nine months ago, the night K-Fag asked if he should pull out.

P.S. Jessica Simpson needs to be kicked in the cunt.

Her belly probably tastes like cheetos and pickles from the slobber dripping off her mouth.

#36 is fucking awesome... their whole conversation probably consisted of burping and table thumps.

Spears is probably PO'd because Jessica kissed K-douchebag.

I think Shitney didn't let Jess kiss her belly cause she probably thinks that's how she got preggers the first two times!

@36 Yay Jacq, that was funny!

Hey, I heard that John Mark Karr has a red Delorean. Maybe Britney would like to find out if time travel is possible.

#47 - I've been posting rather infrequently b/c I hit a shitty patch at the office - I have had to bust my ass lately.
You'd have to convince her to drive it off a cliff to get falling fast enough to REALLY time travel.

#46 - Everyone knows that BACK RUBS are what get you pregnated.

she got the idea of time travel from an episode of the superfriends the time when flash was spinning around so fast that he went back in time. hell, her head is spinning around so fast that she might actually do it.

Jess wanted to get down and suck on the imaginary umbilical cord, twirl it around in her mouth and pretend it was her ex-husband's cock.

Then she wanted to spit in the hole a little bit and suck it out with some of the belly button crud that has been resident there since the last puppy Brit squeezed out.

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

I gotta say, I think Britany is a nasty trashy cow that somebody has taught to wear human clothes...HOWEVER, Jessica Simpson is a psychopath for asking somebody she barely knows if she can kiss their belly.

As far as I'm concerned Brittany came out of this situation looking way better than Miss Simpson. Perhaps having to give her dad blow-jobs for her allowance made her unable to distinguish proper from improper behavior.

I just think that was Jessica's way of saying she wanted to taste Britney's redneck cooter hole.

You can always take the trash out of the trailer ....................

Can you imagine Jessica's Simpson's pregnant boobs!!! They'd have enough milk to nurish an entire village in Africa.

http://www.spoonspam.com

# 18. Krisdylee I second that. How come when you are pregnant people think it's ok to ask to do stuff to ya that they would get punched for doing if you weren't pregnant? Good for Britney - I think Jess was probably just shocked that someone actually turned her down when she asked to put her lips on them.

Just imagine where Brits rack will be in seven years after she's just had her tenth child.

Has anyone told her that despite what K-Fed said, covering the top of a warm bottle of coke with your thumb, shaking it, then inserting it up her vag and letting it squirt out is not a valid form of birth control?

Even if it is one of those new three liter bottles and she's putting a whole box of mentos in it.

Jessica is true to form (read: what a dumbass!) - maybe she forgot about the skit she did mocking Brit on SNL. http://www.jokaroo.com/funnyvideos/jessicasimpsonmocksbritneyspears.html

@ #4 youre fuckin hilarious

If I were Britney (and I thank the baby jesus everyday that I am not) I would have been like "Sure". And then as fat ass Simpson bends over I'd take her by the head with both hands, knee her in the face something good, pile drive her into cement flooring and pull a Jimmy SuperFly SNooka off of a couch and crush her pelvis. And blame it on my hormones.

fuck fuckity fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fucking fuck fuck fuck fuck fucking fuck fuck FAT-FUCK!

is this jessica's sick way of making truce? when in doubt...kiss the belly.

I'm torn. On the one hand, it must be annoying for people to think they can touch/kiss/fondle your bod just cause it's got a baby sloshing around inside it. Pregnant chicks must get really tired of people (mostly other chicks) wanting to touch their stomach, like it's a rabbit's foot or a pet or something. Much less kiss it. Ew. Even if it was the cleanest stomach imaginable, why would you want to do something like that? Weirdness.

On the other hand, we all saw Britney frenching Madonna, so you sorta can't blame Jessica for assuming Britney has no boundaries (or dignity).

Wow, thinking of those two together in the same room, with all that hair and all those boobs... you know there's a pregnancy fetish site going nuts right now just thinking about it. Or probably every pervert site, really. They've probably already photoshopped a picture to jerk off to.

#59: Well said. I second that.

Britney to Sean Paul when she's on one of her eating binges: "Get in my belly!!!!" I can see her now as Fat Bastard. She certainly has the fat part down pat.

This is just further proof that Jessica Simpson hails from another planet.

http://glossedover.com

i'm waiting for the day Brit's Tit's Explode.

I guess Kev has spent so much of her money that the poor thing can't afford to buy a new dress to change into between her Wal-mart and award show appearances (she's wearing the same dress to both)!

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA Jessica reminds me of the creepy old ladies that live in your tenament back in eastern europe!

@30- "blown-out cooch"

well you know now that britbrit is such a mega-super-security-concerned mutha she probably didn't want chestica's lips touching the baby's protective uterian covering for fear the plastification would permeate her organisms.. now that shits scientific.. if only she'd listen to good advice she wouldn't be in this pregnified position again..
http://www.stingybitches.com/stingy%20advice%20archive%20sex%20offender.html

I'm with Britney on this one. Who would let someone except maybe the father kiss your pregnant belly. I wouldn't. Why do people think as soon as your belly is swollen that they can touch rub pat and bloody kiss it. Say it loud and proud Brit "HELL NO!"

OK Superficial guy. That commentary was funny. Finally!

alllllllllllllrighty then. she wants to kiss britney's pregnant belly. seriously, what has papa perv been putting into jessica's water???? I have to I would say hell no, too. Britney may not be all that in the brain department, but who would want someone you don't know kissing your pregnant belly...that's just weird

I bet he's got good oral skills & I don't mean the lyrical type. Heeheee

South. It's all gone South and it's never coming back up again.

I think the conversation went more like this:

JS: Can I kiss that bloaty thang you's gotten stuck to you? That thang with the tiny little brain in it?
BS (looking at KFed): Hell, no!

If she'd had any sense (which we know she don't) she'd have said yes and maybe KFed would have jumped hosts.

LOL some of you guys are so damn funny, you could make a living with comical writing (you know who you are). I live alone and I look like a fucking crazy person laughing hysterically at my lap top rocking back and forward, thank god I live alone (is all I can say).

Firstly on this one. I can't believe that even Jessica would ask to do that. Like C'mon, it's gotta be made up bull. I mean she's clueless but she's had experience with pregnant friends before 'just watch newlyweds season 2 or 3, Nick Lachey is hot'.

Secondly Brit wouldn't have "yelled" at her. I know she looses it when she's stoned or pissed but she was neither cause she's pregs, and she's all sweet southern girl talking when she's normal.

Thirdly aren't they both southern? Texas and Louisiana? I don't know if Texas counts as southern cause I'm Australian but I'm sure if that conversation is true it would have sounded like the dumbest bitchfest ever (I love southern USA accents FYI so no offence any southerners, just not they way those two girls put them on for show)..

Yeah it's SO wierd to ask to kiss a preggo belly unless you're the husband (oh MY god - Is Jessica the father??? I always knew that square jawline belonged to a penis down there somewhere)!

Heres how Brit REALLY replied:

*chew* *chew* *chew* *blow a bubble* *POP!* *snap* *chew* *chew* *snap* *blow bubble* *POP!* *chew* *chew* *chew*
"HELL NO!"
*chew* *chew* *blow bubble* *POP!*

Then grabbed her WalMart loot, and picked up Sean Preston from the broom closet she had watch him for the past few hours, and sped off off in her BMW.

#19..you made me pee a little.

Neither of these blondes are in my collection of favourite people but for once, i think Brit deserves a standing ovation. How on earth does Jess think that a person she barely knows will let her do that? If she was so excited about unborn children, why didn't she try to get her own and invite the whole world to kiss(or bite) as they please.
by the way what the hell was Brit supposed to be wearing?

@77 when you say bite, I'm assuming you're talking about Tom Cruise. Also I dig that you're from the UK.

#75- I knew I wasn't the only one... Jessica is really Jessie the guy her papa is just so twisted. Well I don't wanna go there.

Maybe Jessica and Vladimir Putin should have a belly kissing party..

SHE LOOKS BEAUTIFUL!! She has that pregnancy glow and her boobs look great!

aww Jess wanted to kiss and rub the budda for good luck

yeah, that's kind of weird.....both of them...

beyonce Britney spears brad pitt paris hilton jessica alba aishwarya rai ayesha takia colbie caillat music song lyrics buy hot wallpapers