I'd still hit it and lick it,
am I sick?

Have you ever had one of those days where you were so mad, you just had to tabledance? I'm with you Paris. Nothing clears up my PMS cramps like giving a good, naked, tabledance.

Who screamed at whom?

Yes griffmills, you are sick.
And if you hit it, licked it or otherwise got withing 27 miles of it, you would literally be sick because you would have caught the super-herpes.

When her publicist said Lo-Ho "took the high road" did she mean that she would have responded to Paris if she didn't have to go score some blow???

damn...richbitch needs a manicure. maybe some manners, too. maybe less makeup. maybe less roots showing. gross.

Is the guy in the front seat the one that tells her how to spell P-A-R-I-S when she's signing autograph's?
If that was my job, I'd tell her to spell it:
I-AM-AN-IGNORANT-SLUT, see if she actually catches on or not.

Girl can't seem to keep her titties in her shirt. God fucking forbid she wear something that doesn't give us all a shot of her itty bitty titties. Yes, Paris, that's fascinating. You have mammary glands. Now put those away or they're going to fall off.

And when is Blowhan going to finally tear this bitch a new asshole? I can't wait for pics of the catfight. That's gonna be so sweet.

barf.
why would want anybody to come near you with something that's been shoved inside paris hilton's vagina.

Duh!

everyday it's something
http://ultra8201.blogspot.com

I hope Regis and Kelly, sent out for a new chair before some the next unsuspecting guest sat and caught the hybrid power celebrity herpes!

she's a salad head...

13--
...a FRUIT salad head, no less.

Doing the nasty with Paris and Lindsay: next time on Dirty Jobs with Mike Rowe.

I still think her top priority should be getting that friggin crazy eye aligned

God she's ugly.

I think the only reason Hohan took the "high" road had something to do with the coke rimming her nostrils.

Nice NY Giants & Knicks. And I thought Big Ben was being irresponsible riding a motorcycle without a helmets.

At least he didn't have a naked Paris rubbing herps all over him.

Gawd, I remember reading an interview with her and Nicky when they were unknown except in the Manhattan party scene, and wondering who these crazy idiot bitches are. I long for those days.

What the fuck is wrong with her skin? That's not oil shine, it looks like she has had her skin replaced with latex. Some sort of cure for virii that live on the skin?

*helmet. Fuck! Now I'm going to be picked on again.

You forgot to put hitting parked cars in the cycle of events that is Paris Hilton's life.

When someone's that fake-baked, it looks really bad to wear light pink frosted lipstick. Bleh.

21 - I won't pick on you but I'll pick under you, if you know what I mean. If you do, please let me know because I have no idea, but it sounds pretty hot.

I know I posted this on another thread but it's highly entertaining. Go to http://www.eepybird.com/ and watch the Diet Coke & Mentos experiments.

That bitch makes my penis soft.........

"That crazy dancin's making my penis soft"

A true Chappelle fan can name that clip.

Osh, You can come cherry pickin' anytime.

Why don't these two just challenge each other to a duel of crabs?

I always thought crazy ho party girls were supposed to sleep their way to the top. Are these two so confused they can't figure out which way that is?

Four must see events during our life-time,

1. Tom Cruise actually sucking cock,

2. SP slapping Britney for being his mother

3. Hohan's cunt catching on fire. and

4. Paris dying of super herpes.

@27 We have a winner........

"Hell yea, I suck toes........Welcome to Pop copy, can I help you?".........

Is this the 5:00 free crack giveaway?

If I had Paris' tits I'd always have them out in public playing with them...but I'm a guy. Guys love to play with tits. Not necessarily her tits, but hey.

But her crotch? What do you do with Herpes Simplex 12? Let's sell it to the terrorists as a weapon of ass destruction.

why does her face look like its molded out of brown sticky clay?

Is Wayne Brady gonna have to choke a bitch?...

So she took the high road? Too easy...
Porous Hilton wears sun dresses in hot weather so her inflamation can dry up a bit. Interstingly enough, the fight seems to have stemmed from Lindsey now having lingual herpes after partying a wee bit to hard at the Hilton... Now please excuse me as I give my lunch to the toilet.

Look at Tron... livin' for the citay...

Tiger Woods is now 100% officially black.

Paris Hilton & Lindsay Lohan are classy broads.

Classy like a box of Franzia wine.

Whoever said that high school ends when you graduate obviously never met these two.

I love hearing about a catfight, but the fact that she followed it up with a strip tease is just too much! I despise Paris, but I have to give her props for making this story humorous.

Paris Hilton has man hands. That is so NOT HOT for a chick!

Samuel Jackson lager... Mmmmmmmmmmmm Mmmmmmmmmm, bitch!

From now on, when you in my presence, you sit down when you pee boy, don't let me catch you standing, you sit down when you pee!!!!!!!

It's a sad day when we're taking Flimsy HoHand's side over BareAss Hilton's. A sad day indeed.

How long will the fifteen minutes last for these skanks? I gotta go heave.

@43 You'll be fucking fat girls in no time.......

The guy in the back ground of the third picture has a really pathetic "help me!" look on his face. Of course I would to if I had to be around that skanky bitch too.

Bitches! Come over here and show Charlie Murphy your titties!

The milks gone bad!

#35 - It's a thin layer of jizz. Constantly present.

While Paris was screaming at Lindsay, La Lohan ran to the bathroom 6 times.

In related news: The entire New York Giants team has herpes.

What did the five fingers ssay to the face?!

Shoot it!

Well if it isn't the most diabolical haters.

@47, Shit, you might even fight a nigga!

I wish I had four hands. Then, I could give them titties four thumbs down!!

At this point, Lindsay Lohan is the living embodiment of a drug warning Before and After photo:

EXHIBIT A
http://www.imdb.com/gallery/granitz/2471/Events/2471/LindsayLoh_Grani_2864972_400.jpg?path=pgallery&path_key=Lohan,%20Lindsay

EXHIBIT B
http://www.imdb.com/gallery/granitz/4887/Events/4887/LindsayLoh_Mazur_8953747_400.jpg?path=pgallery&path_key=Lohan,%20Lindsay

She probably wears underwear with dick-holes in 'em!

Kudos to Lindsay for having enough sense to just walk away. Of course, the real reason why she couldn't stay and fight was probably because she had to go "powder her nose" once again..

I know better than to come between a niggar & his pork. Might get my fingers bit.. *bite bite*

Wow. I never thought I'd say this, but...go Lindsay!

#56 CDob: holy toledo, that's a good comparison of before and after.
well, two hookers fighting over a guy. though why anyone would sleep with a guy paris hilton has been with is as scary as walking around barefoot in the bathroom at the gast station.

"Teaching Tim how to ride a bike, these are the Niggars that we like, N-I-G-G-A-R, it's the Niggar family".........Alright I'm done, sorry.............

Wait a freakin' minute. This man has dated Mary-Kate Olsen, Paris Hilton, and now Lindsay Lohan (although her rep would have us believe he's just one of several overseas men, neh?)? Who's next, Courtney Love? What the hell does he see in these ladies?

@62: Precious. I could cuddle and watch chappelle with you for hours (or minutes, depending....)

Lohan is beyond ridiculous.

#56 - While that is a correct observation, it was done last week by someone else.

http://gofugyourself.typepad.com/go_fug_yourself/lindsay_lohan/index.html

hi everyone , i just can ´t belive he was with her ,anyway what does a man like that see in a women like her someone explan ???????????????????...........

Paris' Vagina killed ten men last season on the Deadliest Catch, but the crew of the Marina walked away with more crabs than they could handle.

I said it before but it bears repeating.

Cooky you must be 13 or older to post on this site.
Thank you, drive through.

#6 you're right

...she's
...stopped
...biting
her
nails

well done babe :)

as much as i hate them both, i must side with hohan...at least that coke-whore earned her money...

fuck that rotting cunt hilton...

she should have been gang-fucked by the entire roster of the knicks and giants...

#27 whatever happened
to fubar?

oh, i see...

fubar

#56 and #66
those pictures are nothing
http://linds-lo.com/photos/displayimage.php?album=316&pos=27

@71 Dude, you must really hate New York sports teams. Why not throw in the Mets, the Yanks, the Islanders, and the Rangers also?

And by throw in I mean throw in, like just toss them into cunt and see which one surfaces first.

74

i'll toss in the yanks...the tribe is playing them tonight...

Dizzamn, yall. She needs help. Thanks for the links, guys!

All kidding aside how dude Hohan go from cute little kid to used up skank over night?

And @73 who is the creepy dude she's hanging out with in those pics. He's scaring me.

Let's try that again:

All kidding aside how *did* Hohan go from cute little kid to used up skank over night?

And @73 who is the creepy dude she's hanging out with in those pics. He's scaring me.

I wonder what her tits look like...

Oh, wait.

Nevermind.

I bet Paris' STDs can beat up Lindsay's STDs. Betcha they can.

78

"cocaine's a hellofa drug..."

They are both whores.
http://celebreligion.com
watch out for an appearance by God.

paris's herps erupt like mt.st. helen...

@82 "They are both whores."

I'd say you're right except these girls seem to do it for free, just further the spread of their diseases.

#73 - that should have come with some type of warning!! She looks road haggard. Get your eyes open, coke-head!

I'm with osh (#2)....after i've had a fight with some bitch in a club i know the only way to relieve my stress is by stripping for a professsional football team. except i'm from Canada, and I don't actually think we have pro-football teams, so i have to strip for the local curling team. and let me tell you, those geezers wives do NOT appreciate it one bit.

Hey you didnt post the pic that you used on your note, its kinda cute... would you upload it?

86

you do...it's called the cfl...

and they have wider end zones...

Let's get one thing straight, I'm NOT a member of the Lindsay Lohan fan club. I wouldn't want my unabashed loathing of Paris Hilton to be miscontrued as defending that hyper-freckled slut.

With that out of the way, I was watching Reservoir Dogs the other day and I thought about how great it would be if someone would do for real what happened to the cop in that movie.

Paris gives the words "Stuck in the middle with you" all new meaning.

oshkoshb-goshdammgosh is awesome

RE Paris: If LL didn't "date" any of Paris's rejects that would leave her with... not very many people.

Get it? Paris has shagged them all, there's no one left. Honestly, I don't understand this possessiveness thing. I thought everyone understood that when you dump someone, they're free to copulate with whoever. Like a couch you leave at the curb for the garbageman. It's up for grabs by anyone. Although I would think that the fact that Paris has humped something would automatically make it undesirable to anyone else. One day Paris will screech at the wrong person and that person will punch the living shit out of her. And I hope there's someone there with a camera to record it. That'll be the most downloaded video EVER.

could it be her rank vag that gets cut off instead of her ear?

#88

You got me. I just prefer the curling team. Nothing gets me going like watching them slide down that ice, brooms in hand.... i get shivers just thinking about it.

What designer is she wearing does anyone know?

They are both really stupid.

Thank you LL, you get a free poster! Only $75 plus shipping.

I like to strip for the chess club and the pregnant teens' class at the local high school on Thursdays. It's a great follow-up to Pizza Wednesdays.

I volunteer as a candy stripper at my local hospital.

95

we have the bridge club at my house friday...you're invited...

I like to put on a blonde wig and trailer trash outfits and f@#! the hell out of K-Fed's ass while Brit has him chained in the basement.

Manny

Oh, sorry I guess that was off topic.

@34, she has herpes COMPLEX 12, no way it's simplex.

What a massive skank she is, doing a striptease for total strangers, just because they're athletes, and how egomaniacal, thinking that anyone actually wants to see her strip.

Can't say anything about Lohan that hasn't already been said, but who are these assholes that want a Paris Hilton autograph? I'd get one and then ask her why it wasn't signed "World's biggest slut" before ripping it up and throwing it in her face.

HERBIE FROG: SHUT THE FUCK UP!

I'm sorry. I've been holding that in for a while. Carry on.

Check out the rock on her finger!
I'd love me some diamonds. I'd be fully willing to kill her for that ring. And as much as I worry some would be angry at me for it, I bet many others would treat me as a hero.

Actually, Lindsay looks pretty good for her age which is, what, 30 or so? At least she hasn't gone the usual botox/facelift/booblift route that so many other actresses have.

What a complete moron this person is! I just can't stand Paris Hilton, she is a complete & utter waste of DNA....If her stupid antics & exploits weren't so horribly entertaining, I'd truly wish she'd just go the hell away

you have to go to a LOT of trouble to get a 'lil tit to fall out.......

#19 too funny!

Each day I wake up thinking I can't hate Paris anymore than I do, but then it happens.

Not a huge fan of Lindsay, but my money is on her if those two tangle. Lindsay would whup the stupid right out of her. What a great pay per view event that would make.

Steph, you would definitely be a hero. The only problem I see with killing her is that you only get to do it once, and who is worthy of that privilege?

and that cunt has the fingernails of a crack-whore...

not...that...i would... know...

#77
Karl Lagerfeld
why do fashion designers always look so weird? i guess maybe because they can

Letter to Paris Hilton:

Even though My word says that to take one's life is a sin, I will make an exception in your case. Concerning your afterlife, Satan and I were chatting the other day and We both agreed that neither of Us want you, so We've determined that you will spend the rest of eternity in purgatory.

Please kill yourself now, or I'll shove a lightning bolt so far up your ass it will poke out your forehead and people will think I've brought the fucking unicorns back.

Signed,

God

P.S. Mary Magdalene says you're a whore.

@109 Perfect!

Is it true that if you stick your finger in Paris Hilton's vagina and she sneezes your arm will explode? Next time on Myth Busters...

She just sucks at life. She has ZERO talent, she picks fights with her "friends", dates sick guys and is a porfessional SLUT!

Thats NOT hot Paris

Best part...she's clueless to what the world thinks...mostly because she can't read

I so don't ever need to see anything near to a Paris Hilton nipple slip ever again. She's happy for any kind of attention, even when it is negative.

Does anyone know who/designer she is wearing?

114 cc

Yeah, it's Urkrabz Onmee & Mekrabz Onyu, the hot new Ukrainian designers from Chernoble. I hear they do wonderful things with Glo-sticks as well.

Oh, and this is one catfight I don't want to watch without a hazmat suit.

What a cunt...

I love to look at her mouth, it's fun to try to guess how many penises have been inside of it...yecchhh...a real douchebag and she is totally full of herself...

There, I feel better now...

111
I think if you stick your finger in her vagina, you'll never see it again. Acid pussy, you know.

bitch.

http://spandexcouture.blogger.com

Steve tackles the wily, and ferocious Paris Hilton Vagina, whose one claw alone could be enough to rip him to shreds! Crikey! Next on Crocodile Hunter: Poon Safari.

ok

cut

+++++++++++++++++++++++++

quick message for uncle charlie

lol man :)))

it's
almost
as if
you
were
anh
inspiration
to me

serioulsy lol and thanks :)

#3 and as if you didn't expect it

wrong :)

Yeah, I don't know whose side to take. I kind of like Paris Hilton's new song... it's really good.

As for Lindsey... eh, I have nothing against her.

58: Exactly: "Lindsay took the high road" in this context means "Lindsay left to go snort a fat rail of coke".

#4 same for me ? :)

Paris Hilton is the devil.

#0 ok we get it :)
so time to find the branch
i guess
and when i say branch...
i meant bush
and when i say bush
its not that smoldering
one that you've got over there :)
and when i say over
we
really meant oVer

oV course

having fun :)
no?
ok ttfn:)

and tou just gerd the cuppy
isnt redstickkered

NOTHING Paris Hilton wears impresses me. She throws around trashy designer clothes like rags. And on top of that, she is beginning to look like a Beach Boy to me. Man or woman? You be the judge.

Slut, slut, slut sluuuuuuut...

Need we say more?

#128 i think we have to say thank you
...for working togethre :)

but thanks for asking :)

DOES THAT "WOMAN" EVER WEAR A BRA? SHEESH - I AM SO TIRED OF SEEING HER TIRED-ASS TITS. IT'S REALLY OLD NOW!

as i
said
old
:)
.

122 you kinda like talking to yourself, so what the fuck do you know...

Stripping for the Giant's? What a waste. Everybody knows Eli and the boys have no idea how to score.

Raise your hand if this is the first boob shot of Paris you have ever seen.

i think it's a little odd for paris to get so pissed about lindsey sleeping with the guy paris used to sleep with, since paris has in fact slept with 90% of the male population, the odds are prety good that no matter how hard lindsey looks she'll always be fucking a guy that paris hilton fucked.

Paris doesn't even bother to try to halfway fasten her clothes anymore. What's the point? Everyone in the Western Hemisphere's seen EVERYTHING of hers eleventy billion times. *yawn*

I'm sure there's a string in her back somewhere. She comes with half a dozen completely uninteresting phrases.

#137
#...actually

she's much smarter than you

lol bitch :)

It's time for Lindzer Lowhore to announce her engagement to all heirs of shipping from Greece that have fucked Paris.

That should make her go completely tilt. She's stupid but after the fourth wedding announcement she'll get it.

I'd be willing to spread that rumor.

Lindzer is a low down dirty coke whore but that puts her light years ahead of that no talent idiot Paris.

But Paris does make better movies. I want to see the sequel, "You're so hot, I'll swallow."

#139 ...sounds like you could audition? :)

In the pic posted by #73, hohan looks about fifty, she has a bleak future, but well deserved for such a ho.

Maybe I should change my name to Feed Me Cock a Lot. That's hot!

#141
...personally
...we'd rather
...believe
...in flying
...pigs

[know what we mean :) ? ]

no i don't suppose she does :)

lol b*tch :)

Where are all those men from overseas when Lohan needs them?

Yeah I'll do it #139 but first I have to see Paris gargle with Listerine, Scope and hydrogen peroxide.

Then I'll risk it without a condom.

that's hot

I like her new song, though:

Iiii've got her-pes! *wah* *wah wah*
Iiii've got her-pes! *wah* *wah wah*

Crawlies in my vag, I could be fresher!
So worn out it feels like leather!
*wah* *wah wah*

"Poon safari"

hee hee, you're funny

You know, the antics of the young and the useless are like looking in the monkey cage at the zoo. Hopping around, screeching at each other, humping each other, throwing poo... Some people are insulted by the suggestion we descended from monkeys, I think it's the monkeys who should be offended. No poo-throwing, red-ass-showing monkey has less dignity than Paris and Lindsay.

Paris is easy to trash. Let's go with an earlier suggestions and rank out the NY Yankees. Start with Damon.

She's kinda starting to look like Martha Stewart... esp. that top pic.

OMFG #66 - I went to that link you supplied, that was scary! Especially the pic of the little sister, EWWWWWWWWWW, I know she is a little kid, but she is really fugly. I can't go to bed now I'll have nightmares.

149-
"It's a good thing."

@ 25, better than the fountains at the Bellagio....but I wonder what would happen if you had to fart after Mento's and Diet Coke? Something like lamebananas might come out, no?

OMG, what is that wart/piece of skin on the end of that womans nose? Can she not afford to have it removed? This girl is seriously a bad piece. Please do not try to get any income from this article. These sites do not do advertisers a favor..I would never order a product from a site that does not report accuracy

is that... her nose? it looks like sausage or a very tiny penis.

Now why would I be interested in picture number two when I get to see her shoot sperm over her tits at the touch of a button?

I heard Matt Leinart is going to start doing commercials for Red Lobster.

He can stand there with a face full of sores telling everyone how good the grabs are.

Is it just me or does the guy in the front seat look like he's impatiently waiting for a blowjob? Could explain why her dress is open again. That or she's a whore.

Check out Paris' remake video of "stars are blind". Paris cut her hair and nails! She looks really cute!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YlVXeKK1GJc

#158 OMFG HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I almost fell off my chair laughing so hard.

um, why is she orange? i mean she's really orange. i'm scared.

#159--- isn't she adorable? Paris' remake video is good! ;-)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YlVXeKK1GJc

go lindsay lohan ♥
she's my girl

"Paris Hilton has man hands. That is so NOT HOT for a chick!"

That's because "she" is really Owen Wilson in drag. Think about it...do you ever see them in the same place at the same time?

Who is nastier LoWhore or Paris? I am so sick of hearing about these skanks. They should fight till the death in the octagon. I would pay to see that!

she sure seems like she has to concentrate REALLY hard to sign that name..."P...X...R...6...6...apple...wait, i don't think that's right. where's my cheat sheet?"

im so glad im left handed so that i have NOTHING in common with ir

As they said on Perez...Mmmm man hands.

I HATE THAT FUCKING CUNT TOO.

That Stavros dude must have a direct connection to his pharmacist for fire crotch medicine.

Oh, ironically, Stavros has also fucked the following babes:

1. Jessica Simpson
2. Lance Bass
3. Oprah
4. Tootie from the Facts of Life
5. Xenu
6. My grandma

Was comment 169 supposed to be funny?

#163 you have a very good point there...

I think you may be on to something!!

#100 see, don't you feel better now ?

lol bitch :)

Oh Alex! I'm so sorry. I didn't put your name on the list. Where were you...under Lance Bass...again?